Cursed Fae (Dark Thirst Series Book 1)

by Sarah Tobias

“Please!” she begged. “It hurts! Please stop!”

  It was all the dark flame needed.

  She’s so young, I screamed as my teeth sharpened into points. We can’t hurt her!

  I was in a state of half-monster, half-me, my teeth no longer extending, but my eyes glowed with the deadly burn.

  She will kill us if we don’t, the darkness said. This is no longer the human you think you see.

  No! My soul distorted, struggling to fit through the dark flame, refusing to concede. No! She’s in there! I see her! Don’t!

  The dark flame skidded against my barriers, her black smoke forming into sharp knives that pierced and slashed. I searched within myself, a panicked attempt to find a solution against her deadly, polluted power.

  Steel gray, the color of wolf’s fur, tinged my vision. The quirk of a mouth and the warm press of a hand against my forehead caught in the crossfires of my desire. Craving for souls. Thirsting for him. One pulling me down, the other rising, both asking what kind of history I wanted to make.

  Asher took shape in my mind’s eye, his silver eyes beseeching. He understood my visceral need to tear into human skin simply for the sensation of blood pouring through my fingers.

  And he was asking me to stop. Find myself. Unearth the true Emily Chaucer from the ashes of hellish disgrace.

  With my dagger-like nails cutting into the girl, I siphoned my will to him, his expression pushing me to remember, to hold on to the light.

  I found it far within, below where even my dark flame could reach, and it shimmered with a thousand stars, a celestial brightness burning in a hidden part of my mind. Searing, glittering diamonds housing mercurial heat. I pulled it forward and it filtered through my eyes, coating my vision in pearlescent white.

  I’d done it. I’d accessed the hidden recesses of my soul. The dark flame scampered against the brightness, screeching, then scurrying into the cratered bowels of her cave where she watched, awaiting the outcome of my untimely find.

  Incandescent light bled from my body, my vision clearing in time for the energy to warp and heave itself, thick as a polar glacier, at the fae. Blue mist seeped out of the girl’s pores, mutating from her human shape to ... its. The paranormal dust motes swarmed and clustered, until it shaded to gray, the deformed smoke manifesting arms, legs, a cue ball head. The fully formed fae tumbled from the air, spitting with anger, and landed in a crouch to my left.

  It was as small as the girl, with tiny, bloodied strips of tendon and muscles for limbs and a ghastly, putrefied face.

  And, oh good, still in possession of those blasted tusks.

  “How dare you!” The fae seethed, its voice high-pitched, yet ragged. I assumed, rightly, it was missing a fully functioning voice box.

  I let go of the unconscious child’s shoulders. The venom was still in my system, my adrenaline making it easy for it to gain traction and spread further. I didn’t have a lot of time.

  Was I dying? Because I refused to pass on unless I took this repulsive squirt with me.

  To do that, my deadly self must take the reins. I folded back, allowing the dark flame to finish this fae for good. I’d reached my goal; the human child was safe and unconscious on the floor. I’d inquire as to how and revel in my success later. And, my newfound shiny white light couldn’t drink tasty souls. That was her job.

  She flowed through me, miffed but craving this fae’s vital force as much as me. Bracing, she sprang. The fae simultaneously charged, and we collided in midair, but my darkness wrapped our arms around the lean, slippery form and deftly avoided the fae’s fangs from piercing skin.

  By slashing our canines across her forehead.

  My face had morphed into my satanic self, my fangs fully extended and my jaw detached, my vision bright as my teeth sank into her neck, tasting the licorice tang of black blood. The dark flame tossed the fae aside like wet tissue, and she splatted to the ground, gurgling as she died. I licked my lips and watched. When the fae was at the brink of death, I bent down.

  “Come to me,” we whispered, and it did.

  The blue smoke trailed up, out of the fae’s mangled mouth and into mine, the taste of it overriding all senses and melting like warm, sweet cream.

  I exhaled, the dark flame backing up to make room for me, but only marginally. She was stronger now.

  The venom in my body dissipated like ink diluted in water—or poison diffused by hellion blood—and my physical injuries healed from ingesting a centuries-old blue soul.

  Threat annihilated, I cast my gaze around my surroundings. I ruined the shop, of course, and a little girl now lay unconscious on the floor. The sky was lightening, vehicles’ motors starting up nearby. New York was stretching its legs, readying for the day. I had to take care of this quickly.

  I stepped out of the broken storefront window, the girl sleeping peacefully in my arms, but I was too late to sneak away unnoticed. The city that never sleeps meant there were usually stragglers meandering around the sidewalks, even at stupid o’clock in the morning. A middle-aged man stood above me just to my right, gaping as I ascended the small staircase.

  “What do you think you’re doing, lady? Is that kid all right?”

  Warmth spread through my eyes, and his pupils dilated in response.

  “There’s been a break-in,” I explained. “Vandals. This girl fell and is hurt. Help her.”

  I gently laid her in his acquiescing arms.

  “Forget you ever saw me,” I added, and headed in the other direction, towards 1st Avenue.

  A few blocks away, I found a side-alley between two low-rise buildings and used the privacy to sag against the rough brick. It took more exertion than usual to compel that man, and I wasn’t sure I used enough to alter reality and not simply his mind.

  How could reality be so unequivocally manipulated? One middle-aged man’s opinion may not be enough to convince the NYPD that it was dumb kids who found smashing antique chinaware to be more preferable than curfews. I was pretty sure my blood and the fae’s were splattered all over the shattered glass that littered the storefront floor, a jagged jigsaw puzzle left for the police to comb through. I reached around my torso, picking out a particularly large piece of broken glass that had lodged itself in the small of my back. I let it slip out of my hand and fall onto the concrete.

  How do I do this? I thought, looking to the sky as if clouds had answers.

  The dark flame blossomed, her black petals opening before she murmured the answer.

  I was a slave to her knowledge—submitting to her power. As much as I despised being the deficient one, I needed her. Too exhausted for another round of mental origami, I slumped against the wall in heavy defeat as she took my place.

  My vision went black. A flutter grew in my stomach, a cluster of flies swarming a juicy pile of spoiled meat, and my arms and legs tingled. I shuddered, and, fascinated, I noticed the air change around me, a gravity wave cresting out, expanding. It was unlike what I’d caused to knock the fae out of the child’s body—that ripple had been a bright, blinding white. This one was more of a rainbow, the hues you’d see when sunlight hits a crystal prism and flashes bright, multicolored rays in all directions.

  The wave swelled, flexing lazily as it glided above the city. All sound and movement stopped, the city caught in a lens and shuttering to freeze frame, click, then back again. The clouds halted in the sky, as if hitting an invisible barrier, before they moved north with the wind seconds later. Cars on 2nd Street jolted to a stop as the rainbow cascaded before motoring forward, the vehicles’ momentum unaffected by the brief break in speed.

  Almost as quickly as it came, the prism of light evaporated into the cloudless fall dawn.

  Did it work? I asked her, my eyes darting between 2nd Street and the alley. Will everyone believe it was just vandalism? Will they ignore the smell of licorice? The black and red bloodstains?

  She flickered her assent.

  How? I pushed. How did you do it?

  She met me with silence and I si
ghed. I should have known. The dark flame coveted her secrets.

  I pushed off the wall toward home, wanting to change my disheveled and torn clothing before Macy or anyone else saw me. Hopefully, Macy was asleep by now, because once she was out, only the sounds of an incoming apocalypse could wake her.

  True, I’d just eaten fae sushi and saved a young girl’s body and soul, but I had to keep up pretenses and pretend it was just another normal morning.

  Unfortunately, I still had a full day of work to get through.

  Chapter 32

  This fairy felt different.

  A constant surge jolted through my chest, my stomach lurching as if I were on an endless roller coaster, dipping and rising, reeling and flying. My fingers wouldn’t stay still, even when I pressed them hard against my thighs, clamping them so tight my hands numbed from the lack of circulation. My senses were in overdrive, my ears picking up incessant conversations, even those in the restaurant next door to Cream. I involuntarily listened in on a girl’s new sexual experiments as she cupped her coffee and spoke to her friend in whispers at the back of the shop.

  But I also caught, to my relief, talk of a recent break-in on 2nd Street and Avenue A.

  I was jittery, wired, and Asher kept glancing over, losing his battle at cold indifference.

  If this morning hadn’t happened, I’d be halfway elated to find him at Cream, stealing glances when he thought I wasn’t aware. I was sure he’d written me off and decided to observe me from a distance.

  At last, when he reached the front of the line, he asked, “Are you okay?”

  Asher was one hundred percent annoyed at himself for asking. His gentle question didn’t match the look of death he directed my way.

  “I feel like you’re always asking me if I’m okay,” I said.

  “Because you always seem like you’ll melt down and collapse any second,” he replied, raising his brow.

  “Why do you even care?”

  I fiddled with the cash register, but I didn’t glance down in time to hide the hurt in my face.

  “I don’t know.”

  He tightened his lips and turned to where Andrea tended to orders, a scowl crossing his face.

  I hesitated before saying anything else. Asher was like a wild animal let loose from his cage, pacing around leisurely, but ready to leap for the kill at any opportunity. He knew I healed fast. He was aware of my difference from most humans. And I wondered what he wanted to do with that information.

  “I hate that you won’t talk to me,” I mumbled.

  A flash of emotion flickered across his face, but before he could say anything, the woman behind him cleared her throat, tearing her eyes from her phone long enough to glare at the two of us.

  “I’ll, uh … black coffee,” he said.

  I nodded, avoiding any physical contact with him by waving away his dollar bills.

  “On the house,” I said. “Consider it my thanks for saving my life at the ship. Again.” Sarcasm coated my words. “If you regret it so much, you should probably stop doing it.”

  Asher gave me one last considering look before I turned, poured him his coffee, and with shaking hands, handed it over.

  Our connection faded as he backed away, the pops of carbonation in my blood like seltzer going flat. I stared at the back of his head as if it were speaking to me.

  That look on Asher’s face, it was so familiar. I stilled, searching my memories to place what it was and where I’d seen it before. My mouth parted when I recalled who wore that expression in my past: My mother. It was how she had looked at me before she said her final goodbye.

  “I’m not able to do this anymore, Honeybee,” she'd said, her lower lip trembling. “It’s torturing me.”

  The thought that Asher could think the same thing, of saying goodbye, leaving me behind to…

  No. I had to be reading too much into this. It was just a look, a spurt of emotion lasting for two seconds tops. Torment or not, Asher and I had some kind of link. He felt it, too.

  Didn’t he?

  “Are you already fighting with him?” Macy asked as she trotted over, pushing in front of the cranky woman who let out another impatient mutter.

  She leaned over Macy to get my attention, her frown lines creating deep crevices in her bright pink lipstick. ““Could I just get a double-shot almond milk latte? Vanilla, the sugar free kind. Zero calorie.”

  Macy waited for me to finish the transaction with the woman, and as soon as the woman turned, flicking her scarf over her shoulder, Macy directed her attention back at me. “What’s happening between you and Asher?”

  “We’re nothing. I’m thinking of something else,” I said, snapping myself out of it by wiping the counter around the cash register.

  Macy laid her hand across mine, halting my sharp circles. “Ems, don’t get me wrong. I love you for all your quirks, I really do. But you’ve been acting so frickin’ bizarre.”

  “Please don’t ask me if I’m okay.” My voice broke.

  “Emily, what’s going on? Please, tell me. I’m your best friend. I can help you.”

  I shook my head. “I can’t. I’m so sorry.”

  Tearing my hand from her hold, I scrambled for the basement door, turning my back on Macy. I effectively shut out the only person who had ever truly understood me. I hated every minute.

  “Emily, come on. Stop, please!” Macy said behind me. Her hand reached for my shoulder and I snapped back, grabbing her wrist before it touched me and—no, not her!—I snarled.

  “I said I can’t, Macy. Just ... just stay out of my business, okay?”

  My heart broke at the shock coating her features. I burst through the basement door with my head down, holding back the earthquake rumbling within, but stopped midway when I felt a hot, predatory gaze between my shoulders.

  Gwyn stood at the bottom of the staircase, her arms crossed.

  “I have my eye on you, Chaucer,” she said.

  I glared, but took the rest of the stairs and pushed past her.

  “Staff only, Benedict,” I said. “Get out before I shove you out.”

  She snorted, but after I went to my locker and tugged my coat out of my locker, ignoring her, she trumped up the stairs, slow and steady, ensuring I’d hear her every step.

  I had to leave. It didn’t matter I was only halfway through my shift and was possibly jeopardizing my job. I couldn’t maintain calm for another minute in this place.

  The frustration boiled over.

  My dark flame begged me to hurt someone.

  * * *

  I sulked at the Secret Clubhouse in Williamsburg.

  At least here, I could let loose without giving myself away, frightening friends, alerting enemies, drawing fae.

  Been there, done that.

  Zooming around, I tore at broken pieces of wood, throwing cinder blocks, the concrete giving way beneath my iron grip.

  My dark self reveled in my misery, skipping and twirling with glee each time I screamed in anger and shredded the surrounding debris in the gymnasium, throwing everything I could get my hands on.

  The rage I’d harbored against myself and the feelings of ineptitude barreled forth, the ground beneath my feet answering my grief by shuddering in sympathy.

  “Of all things Damos, I leave you for a few weeks, and now suddenly you’re the Incredible Hulk?”

  I was about to hurl the basketball stand, but I froze, my head snapping toward the familiar voice.

  Derek retreated a step, a trait he seemed to have picked up ever since coming across me. “Emily, your eyes.”

  “What about them?” I said, stalking towards him. “Are they exuding a new superpower I won’t be able to control? Can I now shoot lasers out of them? Is that my next party trick?”

  Derek threw his hands up. “Whoa, babycakes. Calm down.”

  “Yes, we wouldn’t want you to scurry away again,” I snapped. I slammed the large steel basketball stand at his feet.

  He jumped back, but attempted to c
ompose himself by clearing his throat. “I’m serious. You need to calm down. You’re literally causing the ground to shake, and you’re making a ton of noise, mightily felling sports equipment and destroying textbooks and all of that.”

  “Why are you here?” I asked, though Derek remained a cautious fifteen feet away.

  “Your eyes still glow that crazy gold-yellow color. Could you possibly temper that so I don’t have to feel like I’m your next palate cleanser?”

  I sighed, the spectral voltage draining out of me as I faced my incompetence. “I can’t control it.”

  “There now, out it goes. Well done, babycakes, well done.”

  He took a seat on the pile of wood I’d ripped in half, delicately perching on the smoothest area he could find. “I better not get any butt splinters because of this,” he muttered.

  “Answer me, Derek,” I said. “Why are you here? Why have you come back?”

  He pondered before answering. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking since … that night when I saw you drinking a fae’s soul. Trying to figure out what you are and how it’s possible you landed at my feet. I still don’t know,” he added, recognizing the eagerness in my expression at the thought he might have found something. “And it caused me to wonder. In all the time we’ve spent together, you didn’t once try to kill me.”

  “Because you’re useful,” I said, my voice flat and exhausted.

  “Yes.”

  “And I won’t kill you so long as you remain so.”

  Derek tensed, resembling the downtrodden puppy that I’d felt like with Gwyn.

  “You’ve been helping me, Derek,” I said, softer now. “I’m not sure what I would’ve done if you hadn’t been around.”

  Derek nodded. “When I left, I was afraid. Truly petrified. No fae has ever spoken of a species like you. I can’t find anything in our ancient texts. It’s as if you don’t exist.”

  My shoulders sagged, feeling the weight of the world. “I’m struggling, Derek.”

  “I know you are, babycakes. I know it. And, as much as it would be smart of me to let you struggle on your own and stay far, far away, I feel like it would be more dangerous to leave you by yourself. I would much rather be at your side than have you go rogue.” Derek eyed the ripped, mangled sports equipment at his feet. “We need to figure out what you are. I think the preservation of our kind depends on it. And you are my kind,” he said, catching my look of stubborn refusal. “You need to accept that before we can move forward. I saw what you turned into.”