“This is really nice.” Brooke’s voice was shaky.
“Thanks. I need to check the roast, so make yourself at home. Explore all you want.” I motioned with my arm as I set the carrier down and closed the door behind us. I went toward the kitchen as Brooke began unbuckling Ava.
“Just toss your coat on the chair over there.” I rounded the corner, and left her there. Normally, I’d give a tour, but I wanted to give Brooke time to herself. I could hear her feet padding on the floor as I moved about the kitchen grabbing wine glasses, and putting the finishing touches on dinner.
oooooooo
Brooke
Blake’s apartment was beautiful. His living room had a wall of floor to ceiling windows that overlooked the city. There was a giant brown leather couch that sat to one side, and a large TV on the other. Soft lighting was throughout. A hallway was off to the side, and even though he said to explore, I felt odd meandering through his space. He’d gone to the left when we came in, and I assumed the kitchen was that way. Behind the living space was a large glass table with chrome chairs surrounding it. The walls were white, and everything minus the couch seemed modern. It was as if it was picked out by someone else.
“Hungry?” Blake came around the corner wearing an apron.
“A little,” I mused. “You have a great view.” I motioned to the window. The snow was still falling softly, and everything outside was lit up with Christmas lights.
“I know.” He stared right at me as if the city wasn’t even there. “Come on over to the table. I’ll get the food. Do you drink wine?” he called out as he was walking away.
“Sure. Anything white is fine.” I carried Ava over and nestled her in the carrier, setting it by my feet. If she got fussy, I could rock it with my toes.
It seemed like the evening was going to be perfect, but perfect has never been in the cards for me. Blake rounded the corner carrying a huge platter. Sitting on top of it was a pot roast. There were vegetables piled around. He set it in the middle of the table, and then rushed away before seeing my face fall. When he came back, he was holding two glasses of wine. We sat down, and everything faded away. I was back at the brownstone serving Warren. He was screaming at me that I was lazy and stupid as he used his arm to knock the roasting pan and everything else to the floor. I was crouched on my knees trying to clean up the mess as he berated me and told me I was worthless.
“What’s wrong?” I hadn’t even noticed Blake move. He was bent over by my chair with one hand on the back and the other on my knee.
“Pot roast was his favorite. I messed it up all the time. I was never right.” My voice was monotone as I stared at nothing in particular.
“Fuck!” he hissed. “I should have asked. I’m sorry.” He stood, grabbed the roast from the table and rushed back into the kitchen. I heard some banging around, and then he was back with the phone pressed to his ear. “Yep. A large, and put a rush on it.” He hung up, and then reached for my hand. “Pizza will be here in twenty minutes. I’m sorry.” He pulled me into his chest and wrapped his arms around me. “I’m not him. I promise.” He rocked me from side to side, and I think this was the first time that his words really sunk in. He wasn’t Warren. He’d cooked a meal for me, and now we were eating pizza because he didn’t want me to go to war with my memories. Blake Douglas was slowly winning my heart, I just hoped I was winning his too.
Chapter 23
Blake
The pizza had arrived in record time, and I tipped the delivery boy accordingly. Brooke had been quiet, lost in her head since we’d moved from the kitchen table to the couch. The TV was on, but we weren’t really watching it. I was holding Ava and Brooke was just staring off into space. “I’m sorry I ruined tonight,” she mumbled without looking at me.
I was shocked to hear the words. She’d been silent for the last hour. “You didn’t.” I turned slightly, cuddling Ava to my chest in the process. She was sleeping on me, and I didn’t want to wake her.
“Yes, I did.” She blinked a few times before looking my way. “You cooked a nice dinner, and we ate pizza.” She wrapped her arms around her middle, her bottom lip trembling in the process.
“Food is food.” I smiled. “Tonight wasn’t about what we ate, it was about who I ate it with. I wanted to have dinner with you. I would have eaten chips and an energy drink if that’s what you wanted.” She started to smile. “You have demons. I know this. I know that I’m always gonna to be fighting them. I know that being in your life means he’s in it too; even if he’s not there. I get it.” I smiled back at her. I get you.” I leaned closer and offered a soft kiss.
“Are you real?” She started to cry. “I mean… I just… I’ve never…” She swallowed before looking away. “You make me want things that I never thought I’d have.”
“Like what?” I glanced down to see Ava sucking her thumb. She was drooling in her sleep and leaving a wet spot on my shirt.
“A future.” She said the words so quietly, I almost didn’t hear them. “I…” It was in that moment that my phone started to ring.
“Sorry.” I grimaced. “I have to get it. It might be the hospital.” I cradled Ava close as I stood and headed to the kitchen where my phone was charging. When I glanced at the caller ID, it was my brother. I rolled my eyes as I picked up. “Yeah?” Cal never called me at night. He knew when I was off, I was usually asleep.
“I really shouldn’t be telling you this, but I feel like you can help me.” Cal’s voice was hushed and it sounded as if he was cupping the receiver with his hand.
“Ok.” I was skeptical. How could I help with anything?
“Is she with you?” He was so cryptic.
“Yes. What is going on?” I was getting annoyed.
“Her ex is out on bail. I don’t know how he did it, but he did. The arrest stuck, and he was in county lock up, but his lawyer got him out on bail. I think she should stay with you for a bit. He might come to the house looking for her.” There was a door closing in the background. “Fuck, it’s cold out!” he hissed.
“Are you off now?” I moved farther into the kitchen. I didn’t want Brooke to overhear me. I wanted to tell her all of this in person.
“I’m heading home. I’m going to do a drive by just to make sure he isn’t near the house now. He’s not supposed to be, but that fucker doesn’t care. He thinks he owns her. You should have heard the bullshit he was spouting off in the back of the cruiser when we arrested him.”
“I thought you couldn’t talk to me about this stuff,” I warned. I’d asked Cal about all of this, and he was tight lipped.
“I shouldn’t be, but I don’t trust him to not try to hurt her.” Cal sighed. “I’m exhausted. Been dealing with all kinds of crazy today. What is it with winter and the crazies coming out?”
“I don’t know. I see it too at the hospital. I’ll talk to Brooke. She’s safe for tonight. Tomorrow we’ll figure out a plan.” I hung up the phone, and carried Ava back to the couch where Brooke was waiting.
ooooooooo
Brooke
“What is it?” I could see the change in his expression almost immediately. Blake never seemed to worry, but right now he was.
“That was my brother.” He swallowed as he sat back down beside me. “He was calling about your ex-husband.”
“Ok.” My heart started to pound. Blood rushed in my ears, making it hard to hear.
“It’s gonna be ok.” Blake’s voice broke through. “You’re safe here.” He placed Ava back in her carrier on her floor, and wrapped his arms around me. I was shaking, and didn’t even know it. “I’m not going to let him hurt you anymore.” His voice was hard, like nothing I’d heard from him ever.
“Why won’t he just leave us alone?” I cried. I was so tired of this. I’d done everything right. I’d left. I divorced him. I didn’t ask for anything. I only took clothes with me. I was living without his help. He wasn’t even helping with Ava.
“Men like him have a need to control. He doesn’t like
the fact that he can’t control you anymore.” Blake began rocking us. “We’re going to figure this out. Promise.”
ooooooooo
That night, I slept in Blake’s bed. He made up the couch in his home office, and he slept in there. I knew it couldn’t have been comfortable, but he insisted. Ava slept on a small pallet made up of blankets on the floor beside me. It was one of the few nights that I didn’t dream of Warren.
Blake’s bed smelled just like him: soap and a woodsy cologne. I snuggled under the down comforter, and stared out the window at the falling snow. I don’t know when I fell asleep, but the next thing I remembered was waking up on my own.
I scrambled to look over the edge of the bed since I hadn’t heard Ava cry, but she wasn’t there. Fear took over and common sense flew out the window. I flung the covers back, and rushed out of the room.
When I reached the end of the hallway, I skidded to a stop, my socks sliding on the wooden floor. Soft music was playing, and Blake was swaying around the room with Ava tucked against his chest. Tears sprung to my eyes. This was something I’d pictured years ago when I’d first thought about having a baby. I wanted to wake up to my husband bonding with our child. I knew that would never happen with Warren, but I’d hoped I could change his mind. Now, it was happening, in the strangest of ways. Here was a man who wasn’t my child’s father, but he seemed to want to be. He was a natural in every way with her, and my heart opened a little more to him each time he did something like this.
“I didn’t want to wake you.” He smiled as he spun around, yawning in the process.
“I can take her.” I stepped closer and held out my arms.
“It’s fine.” He brushed me off. “I changed her, and gave her a bottle. We’re good.” He smiled. “There’s some breakfast in the kitchen. Help yourself.” He tipped his head to the right.
“Thanks.” I shuffled around the corner and immediately smelled coffee. Blake had left a plate of fruit out with some bagels and cream cheese. There was a mug sitting on the counter with a sugar bowl nearby.
“I hope milk is ok. I don’t keep cream in the house,” he called.
I pressed my lips together to keep from crying. He was going to make me lose it. “Milk is fine,” I choked out. I made a cup of coffee for myself, and grabbed a piece of melon. This man was too perfect. Here I was wearing an oversized pair of his scrubs, eating breakfast that he’d prepared, while he took care of my daughter. I almost pinched myself to make sure it was all real.
“Once you’re finished, we’re going to go back to the house to discuss a plan with Donna. I think Cal wants to make sure that you feel safe there.” Blake was now leaning against the counter, watching me.
Ok.” I nodded. “It won’t take me long to get ready.” I finished the melon, and carried my coffee back to Blake’s room. My clothes from the night before were draped over a chair in the corner. It didn’t take me but a few minutes to dress, and then I was back in the living room.
“Ready.” I forced a smile. I wasn’t sure how I was supposed to feel about all of this. Scared? Angry? I’d been feeling those emotions for so long that I was tired of them. I wanted to feel happiness. I’d seen it in glimpses, but I wanted more. I wanted a lifetime of it, and the more time I spent with Blake, the more I wanted it with him.
Chapter 24
Brooke
It’s been two weeks since Warren got out on bail. It’s been rather quiet around here, and dare I say normal. Cal was coming by pretty often, but when Warren didn’t make an appearance, he cut back. Blake’s been over many times, but he’s working a double today. Donna has been even more vigilant, and I rarely leave the house. Roni called just a few days ago, and let me know that the OP had been extended, and to call 911 if Warren showed up. It’s made me a little on edge to tell you the truth. As much as I want to make sure I’m safe, I feel like I’m the one who’s done something wrong. I’m living as if I’m the one in trouble.
Christmas is in just a few days and Blake has invited me to spend some time with him. I told him I wanted to have Ava’s first Christmas morning be here at the house, but I was open to spending time afterwards. He said he understood, but I could see disappointment on his face. It’s not that I don’t want to spend time at his place, it’s just that I feel like the house is my place. I want Ava to feel like she has a home. Donna and I have been discussing what I need to do to get my own apartment. I feel like I need to live on my own for a while before I live with another person. I need to be me, that’s something I learned in therapy. I need to build a life that I want, and then if Blake or someone else fits in, great, but I need to be me first.
ooooooooo
“I’ve got to run out to the store, Amy’s here if you need help with anything.” Donna was leaning in my doorway. I’d been sitting on my bed with Ava. Donna rarely left me alone lately with the threat of Warren showing up.
“Ok. Don’t worry. We’ll be fine, won’t we, pretty girl?” I cooed as I tickled Ava’s feet.
“See you in a bit.” Donna smiled back at me before leaving.
We’d made plans for what to do if anyone showed up. We all knew the rules. Part of living in the house is learning how to watch out for one another. We all have our enemies, and we all needed to know who those were. There were steps to follow, and weapons for protection. Donna kept a handgun hidden in the hall closet. We knew where it was, and how to use it. None of us wanted to use it, but it was there just in case. After Donna had lost Emily, she swore she’d never lose another woman and she’d do whatever necessary to make sure that truth held.
I honestly don’t remember much about this day. It comes to me in pieces. I’d like to believe it’s my brain’s way of protecting me. Blake says that sometimes we can’t remember things because our mind just shuts it out.
It was around lunch time when Ava went down for her afternoon nap. Amy was in the living room, and I was straightening up the kitchen. We’d done some holiday baking that morning, and left a bit of a mess. I heard the doorbell ring, and Amy call that she had it. I didn’t think anything about it. Amy was always answering the door. It was her thing, so to speak. She was like a kid in a lot of ways. She was the youngest of all of us, and seemed to enjoy seeing who was visiting.
This time was different. The usual laugh or teasing response she gave to visitors never came. “Brooke?” Her voice trembled, and I knew right away that something was off.
“Just a minute,” I called back. I was drying my hands.
“No, now!” His voice was clipped and a chill ran down my spine.
I dropped the dish towel as a chill ran through my body. He was here. He was going to kill me, and maybe Amy too. I closed my eyes and swallowed as I attempted to control the fear.
Our kitchen had two doors, one that led to the dining room and one that led to the hallway. I slowly moved toward the hallway, sliding my feet along so the floor wouldn’t squeak. I knew Warren’s routine. I knew that I couldn’t give in. I knew that if I did what he asked, he’d assume complete control.
“Brooke!” His voice boomed and got louder. He was inside now, and coming after me. My feet moved faster down the hallway. My hand gripped the closet door just as he reached me. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” He leaned in next to my ear. His breath reeked of bourbon and he looked as if he hadn’t showered in a few days.
“Nowhere,” I whispered. I refused to let go of the door, and I prayed that Amy was calling 911. She knew the process. She knew he was here to either take me with him or kill me.
“You’re coming with me, you little slut! I’ve been watching you with that doctor. You spread your legs for him yet?” His grip on my shoulder tightened, digging in. I’d have a bruise for sure.
“Warren,” I begged. “You’re hurting me,” I whimpered.
“Did you think I was here to play nice?” he scoffed. “You’ve had your fun. Now it’s time to go.” He started to pull me away, but I fought back.
I was not going to go do
wn without a fight. I spun, and shoved against his chest. He stumbled back, and I used those few precious seconds to stuff my hand between the pillows on the top shelf. My fingers wrapped around the wooden grip, and I spun to face him. “No!” I shouted as I pointed the pistol at him. “Never again!”
“Are you serious right now?” He laughed. He laughed so hard he almost lost his balance.
“Leave!” I demanded.
“I’m not going anywhere without you.” His head tipped to the side as a smirk spread across it. “I’m never going to stop coming for you, you know that, right? I’m always going to be there. You’re never going to have a normal life, and that doctor isn’t going to want you when he finds out how pathetic you are. You’re used goods, Brooke. I took what little you had to offer.” He sneered.
It happened in a blur. Warren charged, there was a bang and then I saw him slump to the ground. I was still standing there, in the hallway when Cal arrived.
“Brooke? It’s over.” I looked up to see Cal’s face pleading with me. His hand was covering mine and the gun. He was trying to pry it from my grip. “I have to take this.” He slowly removed it from my hand. “You’re safe. It’s over.” He said the words again, but they barely registered.
“You should take her and get her checked out.” I glanced up to see Blake nodding.
“I got you.” His arms wrapped around me, and he started walking me out of the house.
We were halfway down the hall when I turned. “Wait.” It was the first word I’d uttered since it all happened. I took a few steps toward his body. Warren was on his back against the hallway wall. His head was slumped to the side. Blood was pooled under him, his eyes were clouded over, but still held malice. How could a human be so evil? What could have happened to him that made him this way?
Enduring Act (The Survivor's duet Book 2) Page 13