Rock Stars Do It Forever

by Jasinda Wilder

  "It's called 'A Six-word Spell.'"

  Chase cleared his throat, then picked a simple but haunting melody on the guitar. He met Jamie's eyes and began singing in a high, clear voice, at the upper end of his register.

  "A skein of kisses

  Trails from my heart to yours,

  Tangling our souls one with the other

  In an endless web of heat and desire.

  I hold you tight and whisper as we kiss,

  You clutch me close with desperate fingers

  As we drowse in the afterglow,

  Drowning delightfully in satiety."

  He paused in his singing and repeated the opening notes as an instrumental chorus, eyes locked on Jamie, his gaze unwavering and fierce. He saw the emotion in her eyes, the wonder and hope and stunned confusion. She glanced out at the crowd, then back at him. He smiled at her, then returned his lips to the mic and resumed singing.

  "The days and moments and weeks that went before this night

  Are but a dream, lost and burnt by the fire between us.

  And now all that remains is love,

  Our fingers twined as we sleep,

  Our hearts beating as one.

  Apart from you, I bleed.

  Without you I mourn.

  How can I bind you to me?

  How can I seal closed the spaces between us?

  With a six-word spell, a vow spoken:

  'With this ring, I thee wed.'

  Marry me, my love.

  Be my forever."

  Chase repeated the chorus notes again, playing through his own emotion, fighting a thickness in his throat, stinging in his eyes. Jamie's face was streaked by a flood of tears. Chase let the guitar go silent, set it down on the stage, and slipped off his stool, grabbing the mic from the stand. He had the little black box in his hand, and he sank to his knees in front of Jamie. She put her hands over her mouth, shoulders shaking.

  "Jamie, I know this is totally crazy. This is probably not a really typical way to do this, but...it's the only way I know. And...I love you. Too much to let another day go by. That song was my proposal." He opened the box to reveal a one-carat, princess-cut diamond ring, simple but beautiful. "Will you marry me?"

  The crowd lost it, and Jamie's whispered "yes" was lost in the screams and applause. Chase heard it, though, read it on her lips and on her face. He stood up and scooped her against his chest, holding the mic away so it didn't thump noisily. He kissed her, to the delight of the audience. He heard a question shouted by someone near the stage and lifted the mic to his lips.

  "Oh, I didn't tell you what the news is, did I?" He glanced at Jamie, lifting his eyebrow in a silent question. She shrugged and nodded, laughing. "Well, the news is, Jamie is pregnant. We're going to be parents together. Now, just so there aren't any questions from you guys or from her, I was writing this song with the intention of proposing well before Jamie told me she was pregnant."

  Jamie laughed, almost hysterically. She took Chase's hand, gazing at the ring on her finger, then glanced out at the crowd, which hadn't stopped screaming since the moment Chase asked the question. She leaned close to his ear and whispered, "Get me off this stage, Chase. I need you alone."

  He grinned at her and looked back out at the crowd. He took her hand in his, turned them to face the crowd, and raised their joined hands. "I love you, Detroit. Thanks for putting up with my sappy proposal song. I hope you liked it." They screamed their approval. "Now, if you'll excuse us, we have some celebrating to do."

  The screaming went on and on, well after Chase and Jamie had left the stage and the house lights had risen.

  The moment they were offstage, Jamie shoved Chase with all her strength against the wall, slamming him into it so hard his breath left him in a huff. He was stunned by her sudden fierceness, looked into her eyes. The intensity he saw in her jade-green orbs left him breathless.

  She kissed him hard, kissed the hell out him. Kissed him so fiercely he couldn't breathe, couldn't do anything but kiss her back.

  "Did you mean it?" Her voice was a harsh, ragged whispered plea.

  "Did I--? Yes, Jamie. I love you. I love us. I want to marry you."

  "But not just because I'm pregnant with your child?"

  "God, no. No. That just made me want to marry you even sooner. Now. Tomorrow. Next week. I don't know when. But...you're mine. And I want you to be mine forever."

  "I am yours forever. I just...I was so scared." She ducked her head. "I'm still scared."

  Chase laughed, a nervous chuckle. "Me, too. You're pregnant. We're having a baby. I don't know shit about fatherhood. This is...so unexpected."

  "I know, I know it's bad timing, and I'm sorry but--"

  "Don't apologize. Never apologize. This is perfect. Just like you." He pinned her with an intense stare. "You weren't afraid I would...that I'd run, or something, were you? That I'd leave you to raise our child alone?"

  Jamie shook her head. "No, I know you better than that. But it was still scared of it. I couldn't help it." She laughed and cried at the same time. "This is just the worst possible timing. Your band is bigger than ever and still growing, especially with how this show went, and I'm about to be promoted to GM at work, and...I'm not ready. I don't...I don't know how to be a wife, or a mother. I never thought I'd get married. Really really never thought I'd be a mother. I don't know how. I'm not even sure I want to, but I'm going to be, like it or not."

  "Unexpected, yes. Unwanted? No. I'm not ready, either. But we can do this together. Okay?" He took her cheeks in his palms, drew her close to him, and kissed her, gently and carefully. "I'm happy you're pregnant. Scared shitless, but ready to take this on with you."

  Jamie thunked her head against his chest and went limp. "Thank god. I didn't know what you'd say. I didn't know--god. I've been so scared for so long."

  Chase led her into a walk, took her to the bus and into his room. They needed privacy. Chase felt his own emotions spiraling out of control, needed time alone with her to process. To hold her.

  To make love to her.

  He pulled her down onto the bed with him and held her close. She nestled in his arms, then turned her bright gaze on him, her eyes burning.

  "I need you," she whispered. "Take me."

  *

  Jamie's heart was pounding a million miles an hour. As if they hadn't made love a hundred, hundred times by now, as if she didn't know every inch of his body. As if she hadn't felt him settle above her just like this a thousand delicious times. She watched him peel off his clothes, lifted up to let him strip her, watched, rapt, as he stood, raking her body with his gaze. She couldn't take her eyes off his erection, pink skin ridged and purple-veined, broad head dark with rushing blood. He simply stood, breathing, each breath causing his cock to bob, beckoning her touch.

  She resisted the call, waiting for him. She wanted his touch, wanted to follow his lead. Before Chase she'd always been the one setting the pace, initiating and leading, hoping the flavor of the night could keep up with her. They never could; they could only try to last long enough to make it worth her time.

  Chase? Oh, god. He led her--he set the pace and took away the need for her to make decisions in the bedroom. She could trust him, wait for him, follow him. She could lie on her back and just breathe, knowing without a doubt Chase would take her to heaven and back.

  She held her breath as he knelt on the bed and crawled over her. She forced her anticipation-tense body to relax as he prowled on all fours between her thighs, his eyes dark and predatory, his thick, heavy muscles rippling. She lifted her chin, arched her back up into his touch, sucking in a breath as his palms skated across her belly.

  The look on his face told her what he was thinking. She stilled his hand on her womb, her palm on his, breathing deep and watching his eyes shine. The gleam of love turned to the glint of lust, and Jamie led his hand down her belly, over her pubis, guided his fingers into an inward curl, her eyes going hooded as he took the cue, took her away from now and into e
cstasy. He captured both of her hands in his and raised them over her head, lifting her breasts to his lowering mouth. His hand left her wrists, and she forced herself to remain as he'd placed her. His hand traced a line down her cheek; his mouth sucked her nipple into an elongated ribbon of shooting heat, and his fingers curled against her core and sent lightning thrilling through her womb. He pinched her nipple in his fingers, and now he set a complicated rhythm of suckling, curling, and pinching, a fiery trinity of sensation blazing like a comet through her body.

  She fell willingly over the edge, bucking against his touch, biting her lip to remain silent. Chase didn't take mercy on her, kept her writhing with his mouth on her taut nipple, and as she crested the wave of her climax, he sliced into her, sent her juddering over the edge once again. He pulsed into her, deep and slow, lips worrying her nipple, fingers rolling the other, his hips pistoning with gentle force.

  He knew what she needed, and he gave it to her. He raised his head and settled his torso against hers, cradled her head beneath his strong arms, held her in a hot embrace and moved with her, breathing her name in her ear, a prayer to their mutual pleasure. He met her eyes, locked gazes with her as they slid and slipped and tangled together, her arms scraping over his broad shoulders and lean waist, her feet catching at the tensing and releasing muscles of his ass, her lips stuttering on his neck and his stubble-rough jaw, her breath coming in hard gasps as he took her to new heights of need.

  There were no words, no cries or screams or moans, only synchronous breaths in the silent room, only the sweat-slick sliding of trembling limbs and eyes locked in an unwavering meeting of souls.

  They came in unison, each gasping the other's name, the only spoken words.

  There was no talk after that, either. Only fingers tangled and resting on her belly, their eyes staring at her womb. Jamie's thoughts were running in circles, incredulity at the life growing inside her, fear of screwing up, fear of not being enough, joy at Chase's crazy, romantic proposal, at his unflinching devotion to her. His bone-deep knowledge of exactly what she needed and his ability to make her feel loved and cherished and protected in a way uniquely Chase's.

  She heard his breathing change and turned her eyes to his face, relaxed and handsome in repose. Her thoughts wandered back to before the concert. He'd been the rock star, taking her with fierce, forceful, erotic power, and then he'd taken the stage with the same dominant charisma, working the already-pumped crowd into a frenzy. He'd bled out on the stage, left pieces of his soul in the audience's ears. Then, when she'd spilled the news to him, he'd turned an arena into a coffee shop, transforming instantly from rock star into singer-songwriter, using a simple, beautiful song to move every heart in attendance.

  She held her hand up so the light caught the diamond and sparkled brilliantly. She felt an overwhelming rush of joy and fear bolt through her at the significance of the ring.

  She let sleep steal over her, knowing Chase would wake up soon and want to go out with her.

  Her last thought before succumbing to unconsciousness was, What am I going to tell Anna?

  9

  Jamie clenched her hand into a fist in a vain attempt to still the trembling. I can do this, she told herself. No, she couldn't. But she had to. She was distantly aware of the bright beauty of downtown Rochester, every building bathed in multicolored strings of lights. The streets were busy, bustling with bundled shoppers, breaths puffing white in the cold December air. Christmas was a few days past, and Jamie had spent it with Chase. They'd both been introduced to each other's families, which was fine. Chase's mother was kind, small, dark-haired, with the same intense brown eyes as Chase. His father was absent from his life, a story Chase had shared late one night in a hotel in Indiana. His father had left with another woman when Chase was thirteen, and that had shaped his young mind and heart. It had also nearly destroyed, Kelly, his mother.

  Chase had bought his mother a condo and a car, sent a huge check to her every month. He called her once a week.

  Jamie's family was a bit more awkward an experience. Her father and mother were still together, somehow, but she didn't see them very often. She had a strained, almost nonexistent relationship with them, which was putting it nicely. Her parents had always made it clear they considered her a disappointment, when they bothered with her at all. Her mother had, during the last holiday get-together argument, called her a whore. Of course, her mother was the one strung out on prescription painkillers at the time, and her father stank of cheap perfume--the kind prostitutes wore.

  Jamie had left and hadn't seen her parents since.

  Chase knew all this, and had still been willing to go with her for a Christmas Eve dinner. The shock on their faces when she'd introduced Chase Delany--whom even they had heard of--as her fiance and the father of her unborn baby had been worth the awkwardness.

  Chase's mom, however, had taken the news with joy, hugging Jamie like a daughter and asking a thousand questions about pregnancy to which Jamie didn't know the answers.

  Now Jamie was about to meet with Anna.

  Jamie pulled into a parking spot and made her way into Gus O'Connor's. Anna was sitting at a high-top, sipping diet Coke from a straw. That's odd, Jamie thought. Anna's not drinking wine. They'd agreed to meet at Gus's, which had long been a favorite hangout of theirs. They always split a bottle Kendall Chardonnay.

  Jamie hugged Anna and sat down across from her. Anna seemed even happier than usual, glowing, almost. The server appeared, and Jamie ordered a diet Coke and a burger. As the server left to put in their order, Jamie noticed a puzzled expression cross Anna's face. Much like the one that had probably crossed her own, Jamie reflected.

  "So, I have some big news," Anna said, grinning from ear to ear.

  Jamie knew instantly what Anna was about to say. "I have some news, too, but you go first."

  Anna's features flickered in consternation, then shifted back to joy. "Okay, so you can't tell anyone yet, since only Jeff knows, but...I'm pregnant!"

  Jamie smiled and squealed with Anna, asked the right questions about due dates and whether she thought it would be a boy or girl. She was happy for Anna, she really was, but in light of what Jamie had to say to Anna, her excitement was largely a show for Anna's benefit.

  Finally, after they'd both eaten, Anna pushed her plate aside with a sigh. "Okay, hooker. Spill it. You said you have news, too."

  Jamie twisted her paper napkin between her fingers, struggling for calm. "Well, um. It's kind of a twofold thing." Jamie had been trying to keep her left hand out of sight for most of the meal, and now she set her palm on the scuffed wooden tabletop in front of Anna. "Chase proposed."

  Anna blinked, and then her eyes widened. "Omigod!" She seemed more stunned than happy. "He did? Omigod. Jamie, that's...that's wonderful! That ring is gorgeous!"

  Jamie grinned, a real smile this time. "Yeah, it is. Wonderful, I mean. And the ring is beautiful."

  Anna's eyes narrowed, her gaze zeroing in on the diet Coke Jamie was sipping on at that moment. "Oh...shit. You didn't order Coke just because I did, did you?" She leaned forward, both hands on the table, her eyes blazing. "You're pregnant!"

  Jamie ducked her head. "Yeah. Nine weeks."

  Anna sank back in her chair, clearly trying to process the news. "So he proposed when he found out he'd knocked you up, huh?"

  Jamie physically flinched. "No!" She scrubbed her face with her palms. "Well, yes, but it wasn't like that. He was going to propose anyway. He...it was--I'm happy, Anna. Be happy for me, can't you?"

  "I'm just shocked, Jay. I don't know what to think. It was hard enough when I heard you'd slept with him. Now this? It's just a lot." She averted her gaze to the table. "If you're happy, then I'm happy for you."

  "I am happy. I'm scared, I'll admit. I wasn't expecting this. Husbands and babies? Never thought they'd be in my future, but yet...now I can't imagine anything else. It just seems okay, with Chase. It's scary, but I know it'll be okay."

  Anna nodded. "I know
what you mean. I'm married to Jeff and everything, but I'm still scared. I don't know how to be a mom. I'm still learning how to be a wife."

  Jamie tilted her head. "How is being a wife different from being a girlfriend?"

  Anna laughed. "It's totally different. If you're dating someone, you know, in the back of your head, you can always just break up if things go wrong. You know, even if you're afraid of the process of breaking up, that you'll be able to move on. But once you're married, it's permanent. It's legal. Getting a divorce is messy and difficult and expensive, if nothing else. And...there's an element aside from all that. I'm his wife. I want to make him happy. I want to be everything he needs. It's not gender role thing, or a Leave It to Beaver thing. I'm not June Cleaver by any stretch of the imagination. But I still want to be the best wife I can be for Jeff. Maybe that makes me old school, or traditional, or oppressed by some women's standards. But it's what I want."

  Jamie didn't answer for a long time. When she did, her voice was hesitant. "See, I don't even know where to start with all that. You know, for all the sleeping around I did before Chase, I've never lived with a boyfriend. I've never had a boyfriend long enough for that to be a consideration. Living with you was different. We were roommates, and we barely saw each other at home. I don't know the first thing about being married. Am I supposed to do his laundry and cook his meals? He's a rock star. I don't know how being married to him is supposed to work. I don't know how to be a mother. I'm terrified of how bad giving birth is going fucking hurt. I'm--I'm happy, but I'm scared."

  "Don't take this the wrong way, but I'm just worried all this with Chase and you is happening too fast. He's a man on the move. He was just on Conan O'Brien, for fuck's sake. Headlining concerts, sold-out concerts, at that. How is he supposed to be a father? A husband? I'm not gonna lie--I'm worried, Jay."

  "You think I'm not?" Jamie snapped.