“Oh, nonsense,” I waved dismissively. “What are you saying, Papa? You know we have never cared about those kinds of things. We are a part of a resistance to the crime world. We have plenty of work to do. There’s no time for these traditional ideas of home and family. Besides, who would take care of you? This is the only home I need to tend to.”
“I always thought so too, but when you were gone...so were my hopes of seeing you fall in love and have a baby of your own someday. I started to be afraid that I’d never be a grandfather. I didn’t realize how badly I wanted it until I thought I lost you.”
I grew so frustrated I could barely stand to sit across from him anymore. I collected his dishes and stood up to finish cleaning. How could he say such things? My father had never been one to pressure me into being a wife and mother, and I loved him for it. I thought he saw potential for more in me. My time away with Alberto had changed so much inside of me, I thought the least I could hope for was for everything between my father and me to remain the same. I had kept so much from him just to ensure that would be the case.
“I should get going,” I told him in a huff. “I’m helping Deanna with the kids after school today, and there will be lots to do to prepare.”
I stormed out without much more of a goodbye. I guess it made him happy that I was spending my days helping at the community center with the neighborhood kids. Those who needed it could come early for breakfast before school and many of them would return afterward for snacks and help with their homework. Many of their parents worked long hours and we gave them something to do besides returning home to an empty house. I was happy to help, but my father’s confession suddenly made me resentful of it. I wanted to be out there in the world in the thick of things. Not slaving away over a stove or wiping snotty noses. There were plenty of other women who were content to do those things.
My friend Ava and I helped Deanna prepare sandwiches and some other activities for the kids to do to pass time. I was quieter than usual, still seething over everything.
“Alicia, I think you’ve put quite enough jam on that one,” Ava snickered.
I snapped to and looked down to see I had been piling more jelly onto the same slice of bread for who knows how long. It was soggy and dripping by that point. I groaned and tried to move on, paying more attention this time.
“What’s gotten into you, child?” Deanna asked with her hands on her hips.
“Just tired,” I murmured.
But she wasn’t buying it. “Oh, no. Look at that glow on your cheeks. I’d know that look anywhere. You’re either in love or pregnant or both.”
My heart stopped with her words. I couldn’t spread any more jam or cut off any more sandwich crusts. All I could do was stand there and stare. Ava noticed my startled reaction but was kind enough not to say anything until Deanna was out of the room. She came over and gently placed her hand on mine, speaking in hushed tones.
“I know of a doctor you can see,” she told me. “They’re very discreet. They can tell you if you are...you know.”
“Please,” I grumbled, holding back tears. “My father is Don Martino. Nothing I can do in this town is discreet.”
“No, I know them. Trust me. I can tell them you’re coming and show you in through the back door. My sister went there when she was pregnant.”
I whipped my head around to her with wide eyes. I knew their family well and never once heard anything about her sister being pregnant. That meant not only did this doctor confirm it for her, but they also took care of it and no one was ever the wiser. Maybe Ava really meant it when she said they would respect their patients’ privacy.
I nodded and stared back at her with desperation. She knew I was silently pleading for her help. While she scurried out to set it up for me, I stayed behind and tried not to think about anything at all. I wouldn’t let myself fall to pieces until I knew for sure.
The kids had already returned to the community center by the time Ava came back. She brought several of her friends with her to stay behind and help Deanna while she and I snuck out. As promised, she delivered me to the back door of the doctor’s office. They were waiting for me and went through the exam quickly. It all happened so fast. I was hardly prepared when the nurse told me what I was dreading to be true.
“You are pregnant.”
I felt like I was sinking into a hole as the words resounded through my head over and over. She told me I had “options” if I wanted to come back later and talk to her. The thought made me sick. I didn’t feel like I had options. Maybe before I ever laid down with Alberto, but not now.
Thankfully, Ava was waiting for me outside. She walked me home and helped me to bed, promising that she’d make up some excuse to tell Deanna for why I vanished. I was grateful for her, but barely had the strength to express it. All I could do was lay in my bed and stare at the wall. I felt numb and in shock. But that was better than the panic that set in a few hours later.
My heart soared with hopes about glimmers of something good I thought I had seen in Alberto. He cared about family and honor. Maybe this would mean something to him. Maybe he could win over my father. Maybe this would all be okay. I grasped for anything and everything I could cling to, to convince me it was a possibility.
But I couldn’t keep a grip on any of that. I hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Alberto. Whatever spell he had me under hadn’t been broken. In fact, the longer I was away from him, my feelings only seemed to grow more each day. But the truth was...how I felt or what I thought I wanted didn’t matter. Alberto was a criminal...a gangster. And to make matters worse, my father was his known rival - the Great Detective who had made it his life’s mission to bring Alberto Milano down. Whatever restraint he had shown since my return would fly out the window the minute he found out about this.
Alberto was not fit to be the father of any child. Especially not my child. I couldn’t let myself forget that, but it also seemed...I couldn’t really let myself believe it either.
My father had always told me that you had to trust your gut. That would lead you to proof and evidence to back up what you already thought you knew. My gut told me that no matter what I thought I knew or what I had been told my whole life, Alberto Milano had it in him to be a good man.
These feelings of mine didn’t come from nowhere. I had never been one to pine over someone who didn’t care for me in return. No, I was convinced if I was feeling this way...Alberto had real feelings for me in return. Why else would he have saved me more than once then delivered me home safely?
Alberto may never have wanted to settle down in some modest little countryside cottage with goats and chickens. He wanted his big house and his nice things. But with a little convincing, could he learn to do some good with all of his wealth? And maybe I didn’t want to die off in domesticity either. Maybe I wanted something different. We could be the rebel lovers like the ones who hid out in that cave - stealing from the rich and giving to the poor.
I knew it was all just a ridiculous fantasy, but I didn’t know what else to cling to in my panic. I locked my bedroom door and hid under my covers. I didn’t know what to do, but for now all I wanted to do was hide.
19
Alberto
I had several important meetings lined up for the day to negotiate some property sales, and I was eager to throw myself back into business and feel some sense of normalcy again. Nothing had felt right since I delivered Alicia home, and Felix’s own personal problems weren’t helping. I was showered, dressed, and ready to get down to it.
But when I walked into the dining room, no one arrived to serve me my breakfast. The usual flow of staff coming in and out was absent. Not knowing what the problem could be, I finally stormed off into the kitchen myself to see why everyone was slacking.
When I walked in, the kitchen staff and a few of the maids were crowded around a young woman who also worked for me. She was in the corner crying and everyone seemed to be trying to console her.
“What the hell
is going on here?” I thundered.
They all straightened and went back to work, offering their apologies. The woman who was upset did her best to pull herself together, but couldn’t stop sobbing.
Finally, one of the cooks came over and whispered to me softly. “Her husband was shot last night. It was gang violence. He got wrapped up in the wrong crowd...trying to make some extra money to put food on their table.”
I sighed, not wanting to concern myself with any of this. But while the rest of the workers went on with their business, the young woman remained inconsolable. I couldn’t very well have her around distracting everyone all day when she was obviously of no use in this state. I called out to her and nodded for her to come with me.
Normally my employees were too afraid of me to show anything outside of a “yes sir” or “no sir” with their heads down while they kept busy. But the poor girl was so distraught that she sniffled and sat across from me at the table, looking completely broken.
“Will you need some time off?” I asked her in a half grumble, seeing that I obviously didn’t have any choice but to grant her just that.
“No, senor!” she cried back in desperation. “I can’t afford to take any time off! Perdón, Discúlpame. I will get back to work. My love has left me behind with our three children to care for. We don’t have any family to help. It all depends on me now.”
Her voice broke with tears, and I could see her trying her best to pull herself together. But it was no use. I felt a pang in my heart that I couldn’t quite place. She had only just lost him last night, and here she was trying to work through her grief while worrying about feeding her children and keeping a roof over their heads.
I was suddenly hit with the strangest picture in my mind. I imagined Alicia sitting with us at that table shooting me disapproving looks. She would want me to show this woman sympathy. Even by my own claimed values, the woman was doing all that she could do. She was working hard to provide for her family under terrible circumstances. I was hit with an appreciation for my privilege in this world that I had never felt before. And I couldn’t stop asking myself - what would Alicia do? What would she expect me to do for this grieving widow and single mother?
“Take as much time as you need off,” I decided out loud. “I will continue to pay your salary, and, in fact, I will double it until you are back on your feet.” I waved to one of the nearby workers, who were now filing in and out of the room like usual. “Take her down into the basement. You can take whatever you need from there. Wine for the funeral perhaps? You will find bread and grapes and other useful things too. Take the things and go home to be with your children. You may tell the funeral home directors to send their bill to me, and I will take care of it.”
Everyone froze for a moment in shock. It was enough to finally make the woman stop crying, but only briefly.
“I don’t know what to say, Senor Milano. Gracias.” The tears started flowing down her cheeks again, only this time with a small sense of relief.
I waved for them to leave me and waited for my breakfast to be served as usual. While I ate, I couldn’t stop thinking about the woman and also everything Felix had said about his love for his mistress. True love was rare for anyone to find, but Alicia had melted my heart in ways I never thought possible. That was the most unexpected thing.
I started thinking about it like a real estate deal or acquiring a shipment of rare, imported goods. If such a rare opportunity fell into my lap in my business, I would never pass it up. I had to think of Alicia in the same way. I knew what I had to do.
I called one of my men over. “Cancel my meetings for today. Set up one instead with Don Martino.”
He seemed confused. “Don...Martino, Senor? The detective?”
I didn’t answer. I only glared at him until he thought better of questioning me and scrambled off to do what I had asked.
I suspected Don Martino would be too curious to refuse my meeting, and thankfully I had been right. I got into a carriage and was taken to a private room of a restaurant in a nearby city. Don Martino was already waiting for me in a booth. I hesitated for a moment before stepping into his line of sight. For all the years I had come face to face to him with potential criminal charges against me on the line, this was the only time I had ever been nervous about meeting with him.
He stood to greet me before we both settled into our seats across from one another. He wouldn’t look me in the eye, which was an odd behavior for him. He seemed like he was doing his best to hold something back. I could only imagine what Alicia must have said to him.
“I’m sure you are wondering why I asked to see you today,” I started slowly.
“I imagine you want some sort of thank you for bringing my Alicia home,” he huffed. “Some sort of pardon or leniency on whatever new terrible thing you’ve done. When she told me you were the one who pulled her out of the market and brought her home, I assumed it wouldn’t be long before you wanted to use that as some sort of bargaining chip.”
“A few months ago, perhaps you would have been right.”
“And what has changed exactly?” His voice grew stern, and finally, he looked me dead in the eye. “Alicia may think that you are some kind of savior, but I still see you for exactly what you are. A criminal.”
“In my past, I have been what some would call a criminal. Si. But I have come to declare to you my intention of changing my ways. Today, I come to you as a man who is in love with your daughter.”
His eyes lit up with anger and fear and sadness all at once. “No.”
“I have come to ask for her hand in marriage.”
“No! Absolutely not! My daughter is a good woman! The finest there is! She deserves a decent, hardworking man who lives an honest life! Not some seedy criminal who cuts corners and hurts people to line his own pockets!”
I couldn’t help but smirk just a little. It was obvious where Alicia had gotten so many of her ideals from.
“I suppose you think you can bully and negotiate your way into marrying my daughter just as you do with all of that land you swindle from innocent, struggling people!”
“I will not attempt to bully my way into anything. You see, quite the opposite has happened. It is Alicia who has bullied her way into my heart.” I paused for a moment, surprised by my own admission. It was strange to hear it out loud. “She has inspired me to change. To try and be a man that she can be proud of. If you cannot accept me as a man who truly loves her, then consider this...You have wanted to put a stop to my dealings for my entire career. And now...I am offering to do just that. But I have no reason to change unless it is for her. If you won’t grant me her hand as her father, then please do it as a detective facing his nemesis.”
He sat in quiet consideration for a long time. He didn’t seem happy about any of the outcomes he was reviewing in his mind, but I didn’t expect him to burst into laughter so suddenly.
“The funniest part is,” he chortled. “Is that if Alicia was here she would probably tell me to take your offer! She cares more about putting a stop to your shady business than I do!”
We both laughed at just how true that was. “Yes,” I agreed. “She is more than willing to martyr herself for the causes she believes in. It’s very admirable. She is the strongest, most courageous woman I know.”
Don’s laughter slowly faded, but he seemed softer to me and more open to what I had to say. He even called for a round of drinks to be delivered to the table. I let out a deep breath. The conversation stood a chance of being less volatile now.
“The things you admire about her...They are what I always hoped a man would love her for. But I’m afraid I have not raised her to be a good wife. There are not many men who would appreciate such qualities.”
“She is unique. And I think we can both agree that I am as well. This whole situation is.”
He nodded with a grunt and took a big swig of his drink. “But...I do not want to sacrifice my daughter for the sake of my life’s work. Even if she would te
ll me to do just that. I want her to marry for love. How can you be so sure that she loves you back? Or that she would accept your proposal?”
I sat back and thought about all the times Alicia lashed out at me or told me off. I could see her angry, wrinkled face and her furious little pout. But I could also see a number of other memories that weren’t appropriate to recall as I sat across from her father. I could see hints of tenderness in her eyes. At one time, she had loathed me. But somewhere along the way, that changed at least a little.
“I am not so sure of anything,” I explained to him. “I can’t predict anything Alicia will do from one moment to the next, so I don’t pretend to try. But I can say that if you will grant me my request for your daughter’s hand in marriage, I will spend the rest of my life trying to win her over if that’s what it takes.”
“I wouldn’t take those words lightly if I were you,” he warned with a tip of his glass. “That’s exactly what you may be signing up for.”
I chuckled and agreed. He questioned me a while longer, wanting to be sure that I meant it about changing my ways. I told him the truth. There was a lot I would need to discuss with my brothers, and getting out of some things would be harder than others. But I had plenty of money to see me through the transition, and I wouldn’t stop until I was the kind of man Alicia wanted and deserved.
“I’ll do whatever it takes,” I assured him. I could see that he still didn’t trust me, but he was willing to give me a chance to prove him right or wrong.
He lifted his glass and clinked it to mine. “I never thought I would hear myself saying this, but...you have my permission to go after her. If nothing else, it will be quite entertaining to see her shut you down.”
20
Alicia
Sold To Mr. Milano (Evil Empires Book 1) Page 13