"Thanks," he says with a sheepish grin I also know too well. "I'll let you know."
He won't. They never do. But at least for now, I've done something to help with the pain until the next time his body decides to betray him.
"You do that. I'm here to help you guys any way I can."
Scout begins to open his mouth to say something, but clamps it shut just as fast. I follow his line of sight to find Gunner standing in the doorway between the kitchen and the bar. He's watching us intently. It's hard to tell from a distance, but I think I see fire flicker in his eyes, and his jar is set so hard his cheek quivers.
"Gunner."
He steps out of the doorway and into the bar. He picks up Scout's shirt and throws it at him. "I thought you'd need a ride to the clinic."
I glance at Scout as he pulls his shirt off his shoulder and glares at Gunner. The tension is enough to make my next breath stick in my lungs.
"Bear's looking for you."
Scout glances at me and says a quiet thank you before he's out of sight.
I step up to Gunner and look him square in the eyes. "You didn't have to do that to him. He only asked for help with a pinched nerve."
Gunner looks away from me and reaches for the empty bottle of water on the bar before he throws it in the trash can. "Sure, he was."
I can't believe he's acting jealous. "Why are you so upset about me helping a member? Isn't that what I was hired to do?"
"Not in the bar." He pretends to busy himself, putting away a stack of clean glasses, but I know a diversion when I see one. Gunner is as hot under the collar as they come, and I'm determined to find out why.
"Why does it even matter to you?"
He reaches around me to put a glass away, but he's careful not to make eye contact. "There is a room for that. We spent a lot of money, setting it up for private appointments. Use it next time."
"I will." He still won't look at me. I find it kind of funny the way he's trying to act disinterested while lecturing me. I've always had a knack for poking the right buttons in people. "Now, are you going to take me to the clinic, or should I ask Scout for a ride?"
Gunner lifts his face to look at me, and I feel his anger coming in waves. I have to admit seeing him so worked up over me, touching Scout's bare shoulder, gives me a sense of power. It's almost hot how territorial he's being.
Gunner doesn't answer. He finishes the glass in his hands before he stalks off toward the door. I'm not sure what he's doing until he turns just enough to speak over his shoulder. "You coming, or do I have to take my shirt off to get your attention."
My brows lift at the thought. Gunner shirtless is already burned into my brain, but I wouldn't complain about seeing it again.
By the time I grab my bag from the back room and meet him outside, Gunner's standing near a motorcycle with a helmet in his hand.
"Aren't we taking your truck?" I ask, confused by the leather jacket he extends to me.
He straddles the bike before he cuts those gorgeous gray eyes on me. "You want to play with the big dogs, I'm going to teach you how the big dogs play."
A weight sinks into my core at the cruelness in his tone.
If Gunner wants to play dirty, I can hold my own.
We'll see who comes out on top.
Gunner
Lexa is dangerous. She doesn't have a fucking clue what she's up against. I'm not going to be around every step of the way to protect her.
Not that she'd need protection from someone like Scout. He's a good enough kid. Probably did have some kink in his neck or whatever the hell she said he had.
But, I know the look of lust in a man's eyes, and Scout had it bad. Bad enough that if I hadn't stepped in when I did, there's no telling how long it would have taken him to have her up in his room.
Lexa thinks she's smart. She thinks she's learned what club life is like in the span of a few days. But, she's dead wrong, and it's going to take making the wrong choice with the wrong member to prove it to her. I don't want to see that happen. Not while she's staying under my roof.
She's glued to my back the whole way through town to the clinic. By the way, she's holding on to me, I doubt she's ever been on the back of a bike. I take the first few turns sharp, wanting to scare her, but when her fingers dig into my sides, and her thighs tighten around mine, I don't have the stomach for feeding off her fear any longer.
She wants me to see her as tuff enough to hang with my crowd, but the truth is, I'm not looking for a woman who is just as comfortable around a group of bikers as she is with her own girlfriends. That works well enough for Everly. But I want something different. Something soft and warm that's the complete opposite of what I deal with daily.
That thought only reminds me of how young Lexa is. She's still willing to bend to become what she believes a man wants instead of standing her ground and finding the man who meets her needs first.
I shake my head and zoom through the next intersection. She's working her hands tighter around my waist until she almost has her hands clasped around me. She's also shaking. I can feel the shiver through the leathers I gave her to protect her skin. It's a bit of a turn on, and I feel like a sick old man for taking pleasure in it.
Around the next curve, I pull into the lot for the clinic and ride right up to the door. I'm not planning on coming inside. I'm pissed as hell, and every nerve is tweaked. I can't trust what I'd do to her behind closed doors.
Lexa stumbles to get off, and I reach for her elbow. She fumbles with the helmet, so I park the bike to free up both hands to help her. She's a mess with her hair plastered to her face, and her cheeks damp from the heat.
A beautiful fucking mess. I have to look away.
"Thanks for the ride," she says, handing me the helmet before she peels off the leathers and hands those over.
"You better keep them." I hold my hand up to stop her. "I don't know if I'll be able to get back this way tonight. Someone else might be picking you up."
"Another member?" Her mouth forms a perfect little o when she talks, and she takes a deep breath.
"Someone." I can't stomach saying yes and picturing her holding any other man as tightly as she held on to me for the ride over. "Bear's called a meeting. It's mandatory. But I'll make sure someone picks you up and sees you home safe."
She nods, but by the way, she keeps watching me, I know she isn't satisfied with that answer. She begins to walk away toward the front door, but before I can make a move to leave, she turns back. "Gunner." She studies me for a second. "I don't know the first thing about your lifestyle, and I'm not going to pretend that I do, but I'm here for Everly, not the club. I want to make her life easier, not harder."
She blinks, and I can't stop watching her. I'm staring, probably hard enough to scare her, but Lexa just squares off her shoulders and keeps going. "If what's going on between us is going to cause issues, then maybe I shouldn't be here."
Of all the arguments I thought we were about to have, I didn't expect it to be this one. I park the bike and step off. When I approach Lexa, her shoulders drop, and she backs a step.
Does she think I'm going to hurt her? My gut clenches. Have I been that callus toward her that she'd have reason to believe I'd even be capable?
"You may not know the first thing about my lifestyle." I stop advancing on her when I feel her gaze studying my every move. "But you know what's most important to me. Everly. And maybe I haven't acknowledged how grateful I am to you for stepping in and taking the stress off her shoulders. I am. Very. Grateful. But this thing...between us." I'm about to tell her it can't happen, but I can't make the words come out. Not with the way she's looking at me like I'm about to break her heart. "I don't know, Lexa, and not being in charge doesn't make me comfortable."
"So I'm the reason you're acting so pissed off? Me being here bothers you that much."
"Shit, no." How the fuck did I get this deep with her this quick. "Lexa." I blow out an exasperated breath. This isn't the conversation I want to have i
n the middle of a parking lot. Not with her. "It's complicated."
"What's complicated." She crosses her arms over her chest. The look of frailty and demise is gone from her eyes, and I feel any second now she's going to burn me with flames from how hard she's staring.
"You are Lexa. If I had known who you were that night--"
"You would have what? Not talked to me? Not helped me out at the bar? Not taken me back to the hotel? What would not have done if you had known?"
"I wouldn't have let any of this happen. Fuck, Lexa, I'm twice your age for one. Does that not bother you?"
"No." She shakes her head.
I run a hand down my face. Doc's the one who's good with the words, and Bear just plows his way through a problem. I'm the one who always has to stop and consider all sides of an argument before I can make a decision, and I have to factor in all the feelings of everyone included. What I wouldn't give to not be me right now.
"Look. If it weren't for Everly, maybe. But."
"You don't even know if she would disapprove." Lexa drops her arms and huffs. She's wearing a sheen of sweat from the humid air that makes her skin glow. With her hair a mess around her face and her body screaming defiance, I'm more drawn to her than I was at the bar a week ago. "Just fess up to it and let us both off the hook. You're using Everly to keep your distance because, for you, that night was a mistake."
"Christ, no."
Lexa turns to the front door, but I can't let her leave thinking anything about that night was a mistake. I can't let her believe that she could be anything but perfect. I reach for her arm and clamp my fingers around her elbow, spinning her back to face me.
"That's not what I'm saying, Lexa." I step closer until she's pinned up against the door. "Nothing about you is a mistake. It never could be."
"Then why are you pushing me away so hard?" Her gaze searches out me, and her chest heaves into mine. She's fighting for breath. Struggling to stay strong, and it's killing me.
I reach for her cheek and run the back of my hand down it. "Because pushing is the only way I know how to keep from hurting you."
Lexa puts her hand on top of mine. Her lips quiver, and her cheeks flush. She's looking at me like I'm the answer to an unspoken pray and I can't keep fighting off my feelings for her any longer. I'm just not strong enough.
I drop my hand to her neck, and I pull her close until our lips are a breath apart. I know I should put an end to this, but I'm weak. I can't fight this attraction off any longer.
I drop my mouth to hers, and I swallow the moan that follows like the starving animal I am. I take Lexa in my arms, and I hold her against the door while I plunder into the depths of her mouth, tasting her, satisfying my cravings for the first time we kissed.
It's all I can do to take the keys from her hands and work them into the lock. I don't want to let her go. I hold on tight, my mouth sealed to hers while I push the door open and move us inside.
In the quiet, there's nothing to hold me back. Nothing telling me to stop.
Lexa moans into my mouth again, and I pull her close until I'm pressing my erection into her belly. I'm an addict, and there is no motivation for me to cure my disease. I have to have her.
I pull back enough to hold Lexa's face between my hands. I look at her, hard. Testing her strength against my own. "Lexa," I breathe and drop my forehead on hers. "I don't want to hurt you."
"Then don't." She pushes against me until our eyes meet in the middle. Her hand snakes up my chest in the small space I've allowed between us. "I don't want to fight with you. Gunner. I don't want to be the thing that makes you unhappy."
I run my thumb across the top of her cheek. "You could never make me unhappy."
Her smile is weak. I know I have a lot to make up for. I've been an ass. I've taken out my fears on her. Dropped the weight, I usually carry on my shoulders onto hers. I need to fix it. Starting now.
"When's your first appointment," I whisper.
She lowers her lashes before she answers. "Not until after lunch."
"Good," I breathe into her hair—just enough time to right my wrongs.
I've been unfair, and now I must make amends the only way I know how.
Chapter 7
Lexa
I open the door to the examining room and walk-in backward with Gunner following behind. He hasn't taken his hands off me since we walked in the clinic, and I'm afraid if he lets go, I'll wake up from this dream.
He backs me all the way to the exam table, and when the back of my thighs touch it, and I can go no further, he wraps his hands around my waist and lifts me up with ease. It's a complete turn on how light I feel in his arms. I've never been picked up before. Most men don't even try, but Gunner doesn't even flinch at the idea.
I spread my knees, and he steps between, so his hard cock is pressing into my wet panties. I'm soaked. I have been since that kiss in the parking lot, but I never dared to dream I'd be sitting here with Gunner's hands touching every one of my curves and his full erection throbbing between my legs.
I've done this to him. I've driven him to the point he can't turn back.
"Gunner," I whisper, and he nuzzles into my neck.
"Hum," he says from deep in his throat.
"I..." My voice catches as he reaches down the front of my shirt and fists my breast. My hardened nipple scrapes across his course palm, and the invisible ribbon that connects down to my core pulls tight. "I…" I lose my voice or my nerves. I'm not sure which.
It feels too good to make him stop, even if I'm still unsure of his motives. I throw my head back and give him further access to my throat. His mouth presses on my vocal cords when I try to speak again. "Please don't let this be a dream."
"Only if you want it to be, baby."
I squeeze my knees around him, and Gunner steps closer, pressing himself harder into me. I could ride him, he's so close to my core. I work my hips back and forth until the silk's friction along my clit has me close to losing control.
It's intoxicating how just Gunner's presence makes me teeter this close to the edge. It's a power I've never given to another, and it makes me afraid even though I am sure he'll treat me right.
"I want you," I answer, closing my eyes and riding out the soft wave of impending release. "I want you to want me too."
Gunner slips his hand down the waist of my shorts until I'm sitting on his open palm. He presses one finger into the ridge of my opening, and I push myself into him and moan his name from deep in my throat.
"I want you, baby. I want to make you feel everything you've done to me over the last few days. I want you to understand how hard it's been for me to stay away."
His finger curves and the tip finds my entrance. He presses in with one long motion before adding a second and pulsing back and forth until I'm lifting off the table and back down to deepen the thrust.
"Gunner," I breathe, pushing myself off the table and back down until I'm riding his hand. Oh my fucking God, I am fucking his fingers like a bitch in heat, and it's the sexiest, most provocative act I've ever committed.
"Come in my hand," he says, pushing back on my shoulder and tilting me to go deeper. "I want to hear you're happy, Lexa. I want to know I can give you joy."
"I'm." I swallow. I'm so close to the brink I can't make words in my brain. My thighs begin to quiver, and my walls constrict. I'm so close I have to reach for his shoulders to keep myself from falling from the table. "I'm…" The sound fades as the contraction hits, and I clench so hard around his fingers. I feel it all the way to my core.
Gunner slows his rhythm, but he doesn't stop. He lets me ride out the storm slowing as my heart falls back in my chest and my breathing eases. I'm limp, and I've lost all desire to ever move again. I can't even force my eyes to open. Not even when Gunner pulls himself from me and lays a kiss on my cheek.
"I owed you that, baby," he says, his breath blowing over my face. "And I owe you so much more."
He pulls me up until I'm sitting, and I slowly open
my eyes to find him smiling. It's not an open mouth, teeth gleaming white smile. No. It's a satisfied as hell with himself grin that begs to be kissed. So I do.
"I need to get ready for work," I say when I find my voice again. Gunner helps me off the table, and I straighten up my shirt and shorts and use my hands to brush my hair back into the ponytail.
"I'll let you get started," he says and begins to walk away.
I feel his absence the second there is space between us, and I'm desperate to pull him back, but I don't know how to without coming off as needy.
"Gunner," I call when he's almost out the door. He pauses and glances back. "Will I see you tonight?"
He grins, and I melt in place. I can't take how cute he is when his eyes light up, and he tilts his head ever so slightly to the side to study me. "Sure," he says, and then he's gone.
I lean back on the table and take a deep, satisfied breath. I shouldn't be so happy or so relaxed. If Everly ever found out what we'd just done, it would wreck our friendship and maybe even her relationship with her father, but I can't stop smiling.
Gunner likes me, and I feel the same. I want to hold onto that for as long as I can. I know we can't continue. What we're doing is wrong. But for right now, I just want to enjoy the feeling.
Gunner
"You're looking rather pleased with yourself?"
I turn to find Doc standing behind me in the church room. I didn't hear him walk in. I've been leaning on a table and daydreaming of Lexa long enough to have lost track of time. The room is filling with members, all taking their seats, and Doc smacks me on the back before he takes his.
"Impending war got you in your happy place?" Doc asks as I take the chair in front of his.
"Not as much as it used to," I answer. "I'm getting too old for this shit."
"Aren't we all," Doc says with a huff. He's ten years my junior, but settling down has matured him well past my years. "Bear mentioned closing ranks soon. You know anything about what he's planning?"
I shake my head. "No." I hate lying to members, especially ones I served with, but when the prez tells you to keep your trap closed, you do what he says. "How's Meredith getting on?" I change the subject. Since Doc and Meredith made it official a few weeks back, she's been spending most of her time either working the front office of his warehouse or staying in the townhome they bought together right outside town.
Gunner: Tempest Elite MC Book #3 Page 5