Cut their limbs one at a time?
Or maybe I should just chemically preserve Chiara so I can still look upon my Allegra's face...
But it wouldn't be her.
I felt it before I knew it, so it would never work. She could never replace my heart even on the most physical level where they're identical.
And so torture it is.
Pure agony.
I bottle up the grief for a moment, needing my wits about me to beat them at their own game. They're probably fucking even now.
Ah, but wouldn't it be nice if Chiara would choke up on father's dick — after it's been severed from his body, of course. I'd like to see her face then, when I make them eat each other's entrails and choke on putrid bile; regurgitate only to ingest again.
My mouth curls up in sinful delight.
I'm at the top of the stairs, my resolve firm, my fingers itching to draw blood.
Until my phone rings, and one reluctant glance tells me it's Lia.
Does she know?
I'm torn between ignoring her call and continue on the path of destruction; but the other side of me tells me to answer it; find out exactly what these people have done and mete out an even worse punishment.
"Yes," I answer, my tone curt and clipped.
"Signor Enzo," Lia says, her voice breathy and scared.
"What is it," I bark out, a little too harsh.
"I... can we meet? There's something you need to know," she sounds uncertain enough to make me intrigued.
"Aren't you in Italy?" I ask drily, already anticipating the answer.
"What? No, of course not," she replies immediately, and her confirmation is enough to stop me — put a momentary stop to my murderous plans. Because I need the full picture.
I need to know what happened to my little tigress, so I know exactly how much I'll punish those fucking bastards.
"Fine," I tell her where to meet me — the only secure location at this point — maman's place.
With a longing stare of disappointment, I leave some of my weapons at home, before I take Luca with me and head to maman's.
Knowing what I do know, I can't let my son stay unsupervised under this roof.
When I reach maman's apartments, I'm met with a sobbing Lia taking comfort in maman's arms.
"Shh, dear, let it all out," maman coos, and Lia cries even harder.
My own tears are dried up, but as I look at her face ravaged by tears, I feel my eyes getting moist anew.
"Lia," I address her, and her eyes widen when she sees me with Luca strapped to my front.
"Signor Enzo, and baby Luca," she rises to rush towards me, her eyes greedily moving over Luca's sleeping form.
"He's fine?" she asks, her voice breathless, but also full of relief.
"He is." I nod towards the seats. "I gather you know something."
She sits down, her hands fidgeting in her lap, her expression full of worry and grief.
"You too?" She asks slowly, and I wonder how much I can reveal. But I remember how much Allegra had trusted her and how much she'd loved her as a mother figure.
"I've recently found out." I admit and her hand flies to her mouth, muffling a cry.
"Would someone please tell me what's happening?" Maman interjects, and I motion for Lia to continue, since she probably has more information than I do.
"I don't even know where to start, signor," she sighs deeply.
"What happened at the hospital?" I ask, feeling a lump form in my throat. I don't want to hear about my Allegra's death, but I need to steel myself. Ironic that for someone used to the harshness of life, to killing without a care, this small detail could make me unravel.
"It was the day you left, signor. She was behaving a little strange, so I was worried about her. I kept trying to pamper her, thinking maybe she's feeling a little overwhelmed. But then she asked me to go buy her some sweets. She was very specific in her demand and asked for something that she knew I wouldn't find easily." She wipes at her eye.
"Luckily, I did, and I returned within the hour. Right in time to see Miss Chiara walk into her saloon."
"She never mentioned that she and Chiara are twins," I interject.
"Of course she wouldn't," Lia's expression sours, "when all their lives they've been more like strangers than sisters who shared a womb. And their parents contributed in large part to that, always pitting the girls against one another, making them compete for their affections. But Chiara wasn't quite like my Miss Allegra. She lacked her warmth and kindness, and she never played fair. It was hard enough that Signora Marchesi blamed Allegra for the complications at her birth, but as the girls grew, it became clear they favored one over the other."
"But they're twins." I add, almost outraged. I'd known Allegra's childhood hadn't been a happy one, but for her to be ostracized by everyone is a hard pill to swallow. I'd had my sisters, and even though there's an age difference, we'd all been close.
"It didn't really matter to them," Lia continues, taking a deep breath. "As the favoritism increased, so did the scheming. They eventually realized that they were lucky to have twins — one girl to keep and one to sell."
"Franzè."
She nods. "He was the perfect target, with his wealth and connections throughout Europe. They decided early that Franzè would be the perfect son-in-law, so they contrived to turn Allegra into the perfect bride. Most of which, as you well know, involved starving her and keeping her in a bubble. While my Miss was having hunger pangs, her sister was traveling in luxury all around the world. She was loved and celebrated by her parents and they never denied her anything." More tears make their way down her cheeks, and maman offers her a napkin.
"I've always known Miss Chiara hated Miss Allegra, mostly because for all her evil machinations to always be the best, she knew she could never hold a candle to her sister. She always tried to bully my Miss, but you know Allegra," she smiles fondly, "she doesn't back down without a fight."
I nod along, trying to keep my head in the game and not succumb to my grief.
But Lia is right. That is exactly the beauty of Allegra. No matter how many times she gets knocked down, she always rises up stronger.
My little tigress...
"You can imagine my surprise seeing her at the hospital. Knowing how much they hate each other; I didn't think Miss Chiara would care about Miss Allegra's birth. So I waited around, suspicious of her visit."
My muscles are tense as I wait for her to continue.
"She was in there for too long. And at some point, another man came in. But it was when he left that I knew something was up," she sniffles, her mouth clogging up.
"He was carrying one of those portable hospital beds, and even from a distance I could see there was a body on it, only a sheet covering it," she pauses and my heart drops. Because I can imagine what follows. My hands automatically go to Luca's ears, hoping he won't hear the gruesome details of his mother's murder.
"I followed him to the hospital morgue, where he dropped the body. When he left, I went in. My..." her voice breaks, "my Miss was lying there, bloodied and unmoving... Half her face had been smashed to pieces and I could barely recognize her."
I look away, that detail threatening to break the tight control I have over my anger.
"I didn't know what to do. I started crying and wailing over her body. But then I noticed something. She was still breathing — barely, but it was there."
I whip my head around faster than a projectile, my hands falling from Luca's ears.
"You mean... she's alive?" I barely trust myself to speak, feeling like a whole pandora box of emotions opened within me.
Lia nods.
"Where? Where is she?" I stand up, ready to go to wherever my little tigress is.
"She's not... well."
"What do you mean?"
"I managed to get her out of there and get her some medical help by lying she was my daughter but... the Marchesi have been looking for me. They sent someone to where I was staying a
nd I'm sure they won't rest until I'm dead."
"Don't worry about that. Nothing will happen to you," I assure her, a little impatient. "Allegra. Where is Allegra?"
"She's in a coma, Signor. I moved her to an elderly home and they have her hooked to machines but... they don't know how much longer..."
"No," I whisper. "She can't die." Not when I got her back. "Let's go to where she is and we can discuss a plan later on."
Lia seems unsure as she looks between me and maman
"That's exactly why I didn't come until now, signor. I don't know if I can trust you. I know my Miss needs better care, and it's imperative she gets moved to a better facility but... will you save her or kill her?"
She looks at me straight into the eyes and I do the only thing I can think of.
I fall to my knees in front of her.
"Please," I start, my voice shaky, "I love her more than anything in this world. Please... let me save her." I implore her, using all my emotions to imbue my words and hoping it will be enough.
"I was right in my initial assessment of you, Enzo Agosti." She finally speaks, raising up.
"Let's go get your wife."
We change two cars before we reach the location, the goal being to keep anyone from following us.
When we finally go inside, Lia grabs my arm to warn me.
"She doesn't look like the Allegra you knew."
I don't put too much weight on her words since I'd never cared what Allegra looked like. I'd love her any way, shape or form. Because she's simply my Allegra.
Should she ever reincarnate into a cat, a dog or a bird, she'd still have my devotion. We'd be like Tesla and his white pigeon, and our love would know no bounds. And maybe beyond our carnal shackles, we might merge into one, become a primeval androgynous: two parts of a whole put together, the ultimate union of souls.
Because she is it for me, in this life or any that may follow.
Leaving Luca with maman outside, I slowly step inside the salon.
Allegra is hooked to all types of beeping machines, her entire head bandaged, half her face destroyed. I swallow a painful moan as I look at her shattered cheek and forehead, and I can't help but tear up.
Taking a seat by her bed, I take her hand in mine, reveling in the warmth that attests she's still alive.
"God, my God," I whisper, my eyes focused on her face and the tubes coming out of her mouth.
"I swear to you, little tigress, that no one, absolutely no one, will remain unpunished for what they did to you." I lift her hand to my lips, hoping I could take away her pain, wishing it were me instead of her. "I vow to you that I will do everything to make sure you wake up in the perfect world, and we'll be a family again. You, me and our son."
Because this is the wake-up call, I needed to realize my little tigress doesn't belong in a cage. She deserves true freedom, and I will do whatever it takes to give her that when she wakes up. Even if it means taking on the entire Cosa Nostra.
"I never told you how much I loved you..." I trail off, my eyes misty, "how much you mean to me. But I will show you. Just... get well soon."
I spend more time with her, feeling at home for the first time in weeks. At some point maman brings Luca and I place him on his mother's chest, hoping she can feel him and see how much we need her back.
"Come back to us, little tigress. We need you. Both of us." I lay a kiss on her unmarred cheek, my heart breaking again at the thought of leaving her.
But by the end of the visit one thing is clear. I will unleash hell on everyone involved, and there are four people who will get front row seats: Rocco, Chiara, Leonardo and Cristina Marchesi. This won't be an easy death, or even a long torture session. No, I will hit them where it hurts — I will destroy whatever they value the most. For Rocco it's the famiglia and the empire he's built. For Marchesi, it's their wealth and connections.
By the end, they will have none.
"I've spoken with her doctor," I take Lia aside, "and he recommended a series of brain surgeries as well as reconstructive surgery for her left side. I'll take care of anything and I'll get you two new identities so you can move around undetected."
Slowly, a plan starts unraveling in my mind.
"After her surgeries, we'll move both of you at Sacre Coeur where my sister is, and I'll have medical staff on hand twenty-four seven. I need to have her nearby but also in a secret location." I add, explaining my thought process.
If Rocco or Marchesi ever found out that Allegra was still alive, they'd try to kill her again. In her vegetative state, she's an easy target so anything could happen. The best way is to keep her close to me, but also somewhere safe. Since I'm regularly visiting Catalina at Sacre Coeur, no one would bat an eye about that. And I know their security is top-notch, so that is an added bonus.
It will take a lot of bribing and blackmailing, but I'll make it happen.
The next few weeks are an ordeal. I'm stretched thin between Allegra's surgeries, Luca and the business. I'm glad maman offers to watch Luca sometimes, since I've become increasingly paranoid of everyone around me.
But as my little boy grows with every passing week, Allegra's prognosis worsens.
"I'm sorry, I don't have great news," the doctor tells me after her third surgery, "We've managed to fix the damage to her brain, but there's simply no way of knowing when she will wake up..." he trails off, the words unspoken — if ever.
"She will," I say confidently, because I know she will. It's just a matter of time, and I can wait however long for her.
"If she'd gotten immediate help, maybe her prognosis would be better. As of now, I really can't make any promises."
I nod and thank the doctor for his effort, even though inside I'm breaking.
Fuck!
From the very beginning, this has been my worst nightmare — that someone would harm my little tigress and take her away from me. Because I'd known, even then, that life without her would be nothing but hell.
Now I'm living it.
With Allegra and Lia settled at Sacre Coeur, I find it easier to go about my business, as well as planning Rocco's downfall.
They took the most important thing from me, so I will just return the favor.
Rocco's kryptonite is his empire, and he always proudly declares that he'd elevated the famiglia to a different status with his business acumen. So I will just have to play him at that.
It might take some time, and given Allegra's vulnerable state, some top-notch acting from me. But when it's all said and done, Rocco's fall from grace will be the best thing to witness.
The acting shouldn't be too hard since people already have a preconceived idea about me — the indolent playboy who relies on his good looks to get everything in life. I know what people see when they look at me, just how I know that they judge me before they even know me. So I'll just play into their biases and turn myself into the perfect prodigal son.
I'd already talked with maman about this, and she'd promised to let me borrow some of her girls to help boost this image. I'd had one request — every single girl she chose for me had to be gay.
I wouldn't want any complication, like someone actually becoming obsessed with me. Been there, done that, and I think I've had enough of obsessive women for a lifetime. It will also help me when the time comes to explain to my little tigress that I've never actually been involved with those women.
Considering Chiara's penchant for dick, even old and shriveled like my father's, I have to make it believable that I don't mind her affairs because I'm having plenty of my own. A modern marriage through and through.
And slowly, I'll change this world from the inside out. I'd never really questioned my role in the mafia. It's always been my birthright. But seeing Allegra's terrified expression when I'd killed those men, the way she'd cursed me out had hurt like nothing before. Not only that, but her diary had confirmed her meeting with the fed, and while she hadn't expressed her desire to leave me in writing, she had compiled the evidence as a last re
sort.
She never trusted me to make her happy.
So I'll give her what she's always wanted — freedom, and a world in which she can live peacefully, and to her heart's content.
"Shh," I try to calm Luca down one night, and after doing everything — feeding, bathing and changing him, nothing works.
I'm close to giving up when another thought crosses my mind.
Pulling up my computer, I browse through some of the videos I'd taken of Allegra, choosing one where she was trying to sing a song from a commercial but failing rather miserably. I play the sound, and I watch in awe as Luca's ears perk up, his attention focused solely on the video. He bangs his hands on the keyboard in his attempt to get closer to the screen, his cries now muffled sniffles.
"Mamma," I say as I point to Allegra, hoping to imprint in his young mind that this is his real mother, not the impostor sleeping down the hall.
He furrows his little brows as he gazes at Allegra, already calmer than before. When the video ends, the crying begins anew, so I just put it on a loop.
Transfixed, Luca continues to watch his mother's antics, and I too lose myself in her presence.
If only she were here...
I TAKE A DEEP DRAG of my cigarette as I attempt to look bored, all the while counting the cards to make sure I win yet another round.
Nothing like a cheater to get the big boss to show his face.
Groans permeate the air when I put down my cards — a royal flush. I pull the chips towards me, trying to ignore the woman at my side. After all, she's playing a role and so am I.
The next set of cards is dealt, and I continue chain smoking and counting the cards. It won't be long until management realizes there is something wrong with me — and my rather fortuitous hand.
It's been almost two years since Allegra's accident, and my plans have slowly started to materialize. I'd made comprehensive calculations to hit where it hurts the most — starting with Rocco.
Now, the best way to topple an empire is to take away its resources. In my father's case, his profitable businesses — drugs and human trafficking. His many clubs in Manhattan cater to worst vices and to the most corrupt elites. What would he say when his stream of customers decreases, his influx of prostitutes stops, and his profit takes a dent? After all, nothing can put you on your toes like old fashioned competition.
Morally Decadent (Morally Questionable Book 3) Page 29