by Ramona Gray
He grabbed my hand, holding it tightly as Evan approached us.
“What are you doing here, Evan?” I asked.
“I wanted to talk.”
“Now isn’t a good time,” I said.
Evan ignored me, instead holding his hand out to Matt. “Evan Fealan.”
Matt stared at his outstretched hand. “Matthew Andrews.”
Evan blinked at him in surprise. “Matt Andrews? You’ve…” he looked him up and down, “changed since high school. Not exactly the nerdy chess kid anymore, are you?”
“Not exactly,” Matt said. He shifted Phoebe in his arm. “If you’ll excuse us, it’s late and it’s cold and we need to get Phoebe home.”
“Home?” Evan turned toward me, raising one eyebrow. “You’re living with Matt Andrews?”
“He makes me psghetti and I swim in his tub and I climb him like a jungle gym,” Phoebe said.
Evan glanced at her and Phoebe gave him a large grin. “Hi, buddy. I Phoebe. Who are you?”
“Phoebe,” I said hurriedly, “this is mama’s friend Evan.”
“Hi, Evan,” Phoebe said. “I like your purse.”
She stared at the leather bag Evan was carrying. Evan frowned at me before turning to Phoebe. “Phoebe, you don’t call me Evan. I’m your father. You’re to call me daddy.”
I squeezed Matt’s hand so hard that my knuckles went white. It wasn’t that I didn’t want Phoebe to know Evan was her father, I just hadn’t expected her to find out this way.
“Nu-uh,” Phoebe said. “You not my daddy. Mattie is my daddy.” She kissed Matt’s cheek. “Right, Mattie Daddy?”
Evan’s face turned red. “Seriously, Natalia? You told our child that he’s her father?”
I didn’t reply and when Evan, his face turning even redder, stepped toward me, Matt dropped my hand and placed his hand on Evan’s chest. “Don’t.”
Evan glared at him. “Get your hand off me.”
Matt stared steadily at him and after a moment, Evan, his face nearly purple now, took a step back. Matt took my hand again as Phoebe slung her arm around his neck. “I pretty hungry, Mama.”
“I know, sweetpea,” I said. “We’re going home now.” I took a deep breath. “I’ll call you tomorrow, Evan.”
He stood silently and watched as we walked to Matt’s truck. Matt buckled Phoebe in and then slid behind the wheel. By the time we drove out of the parking lot, Evan was back in his car and on his cell phone. I avoided looking at him as we drove past his car and onto the street.
“You okay?” Matt asked.
I nodded. “I think so.” I glanced at Phoebe before lowering my voice. “I’m sorry. I’m not sure why Phoebe said you were her daddy, but I’ll talk to her about it.”
“If you don’t want her calling me daddy, I get that, but just so you know, I’m perfectly fine with it,” Matt replied.
I blinked at him. “You are?”
He nodded. “Yes.”
“Matt, I…”
I reached for his hand and squeezed it hard as he smiled at me. “We’re a family, Nat.” He glanced in the rearview mirror and smiled at Phoebe. “You and me and Phoebe makes three.”
“You and me and Phoebe makes three,” Phoebe sang out. “Phoebe makes three. Phoebe makes three poops in the toilet.”
She burst into giggles as Matt said, “Man, no one ever told me that kids liked talking about poop so much.”
“I think that might be a Phoebe specialty,” I said before squeezing his hand again. “Still want to be a part of this family?”
He smiled again. “Sweetheart, it’s the only thing I want.”
* * *
“Yer man pickin’ you up tonight?” Stanley shut off the lights to the diner before joining me at the front door.
“No, he’s at home with Phoebe,” I said.
Stanley snorted. “Never thought I’d see the day where Matt Andrews spent his Saturday night at home babysittin’ a kid.”
“People change.” My voice was defensive, and Stanley regarded me silently for a moment.
“Yeah,” he finally said. “I guess they do. Ya need a ride?”
I gave the gruff cook a surprised look. “Um, no, my car is fixed now. But, thanks.”
“Sure. Set the alarm.”
I set the alarm and we walked out of the diner. Stanley locked it and turned around, grunting in surprise. I turned and my stomach twisted when I saw Evan leaning against his rental car. I hadn’t seen him since Wednesday night, and I hadn’t heard from him either. I’d tried calling him the next day, but he’d ignored my calls and my texts. His lawyer wasn’t returning Maggie’s calls either.
I’d almost hoped that he’d given up, but I should have known better. Evan was stubborn. Even worse, he was pissed off. He put on a good show for people, but I knew the real him. Knew how vindictive and mean spirited he really was.
“What do you want, Evan?” I said.
“We need to talk.”
“It’s late and I’m tired. I’ve given you plenty of chances to talk since Thursday morning.”
He glared at me. “I’ve been busy. My life doesn’t revolve around you.”
“Nor does mine revolve around you,” I said. “You can’t just keep showing up at my work place whenever you want to have a discussion.”
“What? Are you mad because your dickhead boyfriend isn’t here to defend you?”
“Watch your mouth, you little punk,” Stanley growled at him. “You might think you’re a big shot now with your expensive clothes and your three-hundred-dollar haircut, but I remember when you were a snot-nosed little kid. Keep talkin’ to her that way, and I’ll beat the shit out of you.”
Stanley cracked his knuckles, and I choked back my nervous laughter as Evan backed up a couple of steps. Evan was four inches taller and outweighed the diner cook by at least thirty pounds, but he knew about Stanley’s past as a championship boxer, just like I did.
“I need to talk to you for a few minutes,” Evan said to me.
“Fine,” I said. “Talk.”
“Do you mind?” Evan stared at Stanley. “This is a private conversation.”
“You want me to stick around, Nat?” Stanley cracked his knuckles again.
I impulsively stood on my tiptoes and kissed Stanley’s grizzled cheek. “Nah, I’m good. Thank you, though.”
Stanley eyed Evan again. “I’m gonna go sit in my car and I ain’t leavin’ until I see you get in your car and go.”
“Whatever,” Evan said.
Stanley nodded to me and walked to his car. When he slammed the door shut, Evan said, “Do you have the whole town fooled into thinking you’re this fragile little doll?
“What do you want, Evan?” I said wearily. “You have five minutes and then I’m getting in my car and going home.”
“I want you to break it off with Matt Andrews. Immediately.”
I snorted laughter. “Do you seriously think you have the right to tell me who I can and cannot date? Get over yourself, Evan.”
“I do when it affects my daughter.”
“Matt is amazing with Phoebe,” I said. “There isn’t an issue.”
“Bullshit. I’ve been here four days, Natalia, and the whole goddamn town is talking about you and Matt Andrews. You know why? Because he’s the biggest man slut in town. According to my sources, he’s banged three quarters of the women in this town. And now you’re living with him and exposing our child to who the fuck knows what.”
“Matt’s past is exactly that,” I said. “His past. People change, Evan.”
“No, they don’t,” Evan said. “You think because you’re spreading your legs for Matt right now, that he won’t tire of you and go looking for something else? He will. Unless you do the same thing you did to me and try and trap him with a goddamn baby.”
My mouth dropped open and I gave Evan a look of disbelief. “The condom broke, you idiot. You were there when it happened, and if you had let me take the fucking pill like I wanted to, I wouldn�
��t have gotten pregnant. But you know what? I’m glad I wasn’t, because Phoebe is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. You have no idea how amazing she is, how funny and sweet and smart she is because you don’t care about her. You never have.”
“That’s bullshit. I’ve always -”
“No,” I snapped, “don’t you dare try and twist this reality. The truth is you had zero interest in Phoebe and that hasn’t changed. You can go on and on about how you want to spend time with your daughter, but we both know this is nothing more than you being petty and vindictive. You’re using Phoebe to punish me.”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” Evan said. “If you don’t break it off with Matt, I’ll go for full custody, Natalia. Do not push me on this. I will not have that man around my daughter. He’s a bad influence.”
I laughed bitterly before yanking my car keys out of my purse. “You’re just pissed because I dared to replace the great Evan Fealan with someone better.”
“Better? He’s a fucking chess nerd!” Evan snapped.
“And you’re a washed up high-school quarterback,” I said. “You’re nothing. Your job doesn’t matter, your money doesn’t matter, your former glory days as a stupid high-school quarterback do not matter. You don’t matter. Matt saves lives, Evan. He makes a difference in this world and he makes it a better place. You?” I gave him a look of scorn. “You just stink it up like rotting garbage.”
“You bitch,” Evan breathed.
“That’s right, I am. You’re warning me not to push you, but, Evan?” I took a few steps forward, stared into his angry face, and said in a quiet but deliberate voice, “You do not want to push me. Phoebe and Matt are the only things that matter to me and if you try and take either of them away from me, I’ll destroy you.”
“Now you’re threatening me?” Evan said in disbelief. “This isn’t going to help you when I take you to court for full custody.”
I stepped back and gave him a soft smile. “Me? Threaten you? Why, who would believe that sweet little me would ever threaten anyone? Good bye, Evan.”
“I have the right to see Phoebe,” Evan snarled. “You can’t keep her away from me.”
I didn’t respond, instead walking to my car and sliding behind the wheel. I waved at Stanley who gave me a nod, and I started my car, clicking my seat belt into place. I was weirdly calm, my hands weren’t even trembling, and while it felt like there was a stone sitting in my belly, I could live with that.
Evan had already climbed into his car and driven away, and I took a deep breath before waving again at Stanley and driving home to Matt and Phoebe.
Chapter Twelve
Matt
“Hey,” I put my arms around Nat’s waist and nuzzled her neck, “the munchkin is asleep.”
She leaned against me, her spine against my chest and her ass snug against my dick. “Thanks for reading her a story.”
“You’re welcome. Will you tell me what’s wrong?”
Her body stiffened a little bit. “Nothing’s wrong.”
I kissed her temple. “We need to be honest with each other, sweetheart. I mean, I don’t know jackshit about being in a relationship, but I know honesty is important.”
She stared out the kitchen window into the darkness. “Evan was waiting for me at the diner when I finished work.”
“Son of a bitch,” I said, my arms tightening around her waist. “Did he do anything? Did he hurt you?”
“No, of course not,” she said. “Evan is a shithead but he’s not physically abusive or anything. Besides, Cook Stanley threatened to kick his ass if he did anything to me.”
She turned and grinned at me. “Did you know that Stanley used to be a boxer?”
“What did he want?” I said.
She glanced away from me. “The usual bullshit. Don’t worry about it, Mattie. I handled it.”
I took her chin and tipped her face back to me. “Honesty, sweetheart, remember?”
“Gah. Fine, but don’t freak out all right? Promise me you won’t freak out, because I don’t care what he said and I’m not worried.”
“What did he say?” Bile was rising in my stomach like a flash flood.
“Some bullshit about how he thinks you’re not good enough for us because of your past. He’s just being a dickhead.”
“Tell me exactly what he said”
“Mattie -”
“Tell me, Nat.”
“He said that if I didn’t break up with you, he would go for full custody of Phoebe. He thinks because of your, um, past, that you’re a bad influence on Phoebe.”
Stunned, I let go of her and took a couple steps back. Nat followed me, wrapping her arms around my waist and giving me an urgent look. “Matt, it’s no big deal, okay? I basically told him to eff off and that I wasn’t breaking up with you.”
“No big deal?” The flood of bitter bile was in the back of my throat now and I swallowed it down. “You could lose Phoebe because of me, and that’s no big deal?”
“That isn’t going to happen, honey,” Nat said. “I talked to Maggie on the drive home and she said not to worry. That even if Evan takes this to court, she’ll have tons of people she can ask to testify about your character.”
“My character,” I said through numb lips. “You know as well as I do what the people in this town think of me. Maggie’s only been here for a couple of months, she doesn’t have a goddamn idea what people say or think about me. But you do.”
I pushed away from her and strode jerkily back and forth in the kitchen, tugging my hands restlessly through my hair. “If this goes to court, Evan’s lawyer will have a dozen people on the stand giving the judge every goddamn detail of my whoring around for the last decade.”
“So, we’ll find fifty people to talk about how amazing you are. Mattie, you can’t worry about this. You’re not just you’re past, okay? You’re incredible and sweet, and I love you and so does Phoebe. Hell, if worst comes to worst, we’ll have Phoebe talk to the judge. It’s clear how much she loves you and how good you are for her. For God’s sake, she calls you daddy and she’s known you for less than a month.”
I barely heard her. The moment she’d mentioned Phoebe talking to the judge, a numbness had stolen over me. “She’s only a baby,” I said. “I can’t – I won’t – let you use her to convince some judge that I’m a good guy. It’s not her fault that I’m not.”
“Mattie, stop it!” Nat ran forward and clamped her hands around my face. “Listen to me. You are a good man and we love you. I am not afraid of what Evan may or may not do. All that matters to me is that you and me and Phoebe are together.”
“Staying with me will make you lose Phoebe,” I said. “You can’t be willing to risk that.”
“I am,” she said calmly. “I am because I love you as much as I love Phoebe and I know,” she gave me face a little shake, “it won’t happen.”
I pulled away from her. “You don’t know that. I think – I think we should stop seeing each other.”
“What?” Nat’s face paled. “No, absolutely not.”
“Nat, please,” I said. “We need to think about what’s best for Phoebe.”
“What’s best for Phoebe, is having you in our lives,” she said. “I’m not going to let Evan tell me how to live my life, honey. I love you and I want to be with you.”
“I love you too,” I said, “but Phoebe is all that matters. I won’t be the one who’s responsible for you losing your daughter. If that happens, you’ll – you’ll hate me forever.”
“It’s not going to happen,” she said.
“It might.” My voice was bleak. “I’m gonna go.”
“Go? Go where? This is your house, Mattie,” Nat said.
“I’ll find a place to stay. You and Phoebe stay here. Do not go back to that shit trailer, Natalia.”
“Matt,” she followed me down the hallway to the bedroom, “you’re acting crazy. Stop and take some deep breaths, okay? We’re not breaking up over this. I’
m not worried about -”
“I am,” I said. “I won’t be the guy who makes you lose your daughter. I won’t Natalia. I can’t even take that chance. I refuse to make you choose between me and Phoebe.”
“Oh my God.” She gave me a frustrated look. “Me deciding not to let Evan bully me into doing what he wants has nothing to do with you, Matt.”
“It has everything to do with me,” I snapped as I shoved some clothes and toiletries into my gym bag. “Please, Nat… I can’t do this. I’m gonna leave. You can tell Evan that it’s over between us.”
“No,” she said. “I won’t.”
“Yes.” I glared at her and she shook her head stubbornly.
“No. Leave if you want, Matt. You’re an adult and I can’t stop you, but Phoebe and I aren’t going anywhere.” She grabbed my hand when I tried to walk past her out of the bedroom. “You and me and Phoebe makes three.”
“Not anymore,” I said. “I’m sorry, Nat.”
I pulled my hand free and walked away.
* * *
“You’re a jackass, dude. I love you but you might as well have jackass tattooed right onto your forehead at this point.”
“Jonah!” Claire had walked into the living room and she gave him a scolding look. “What the hell, man? That’s not being a best friend.”
She squeezed my shoulder and I gave her a faint smile. “Thank you, Claire. And thanks for letting me crash here last night.”
“You’re welcome, Mattie. You know you’re welcome to stay with us for as long as you need.”
“Nope, you’re not,” Jonah said. “You can stay here one more night and then you’re going back to Natalia, you jackass.”
“Jonah,” Claire gave him a threatening look, “stop it.”
“It’s called tough love, Claire,” Jonah said. He leaned forward and stared at me. “I’ve coddled him long enough, now it’s time for the real shit.”
“He’s been here for like twelve hours,” Claire said, “I think you can coddle him a little longer. His heart is broken.”
“Yeah, because he’s being an idiot. Listen, when I fucked things up with you, Matt came to this very house and told me to get my shit together. Didn’t you?”