If You Were Mine
Page 24
“Yes.” I smiled up at him, tears in my eyes. “You can.”
He kissed me again. “Come here.” Taking me by one hand, he led me out of the garage, around the front of the house, and up the steps onto the porch, where a beautiful wooden porch swing hung from silver chains, swaying a little in the wind.
I gasped, bringing my gloved hands to my cheeks. “Oh my God!”
“I made it for you.”
“You made this?” I moved closer, detecting the scent of fresh cedar. I took off my glove and ran a hand along its smooth, narrow boards. No one had ever made me anything like this before.
“I hope it’s as nice as the one you dream about in your future.”
“It’s beautiful,” I said tearfully. “Even better than the one I imagined.”
“I know it’s winter right now, and we won’t use it for a while, but I’m going to be here come spring. And summer. And the summer after that.” He took me by the shoulders and turned me toward him. No regret or sorrow in his voice now—it was strong and sure. “I was wrong, Claire. Love is enough. Let me stay.”
I tried to speak but couldn’t. My whole body had started to shiver, but it wasn’t the cold.
He rested his forehead against mine, rubbed his hands up and down my arms as if to warm me. “I’ve made a thousand mistakes in my life, and I might make a thousand more, but walking away from you won’t be one of them. I don’t deserve you, but if you were mine, I’d spend every last damn day of my life trying.”
“Theo.” I finally found my voice. “Come inside with me.”
* * *
It was both a reunion and a new beginning.
A dream remembered and a story not yet told.
Our bodies moved together with familiar ease but each kiss, each caress, each breath shared between us felt like the first.
When he was deep inside me, my legs wrapped around his waist, our fingers locked together next to my head, his eyes on mine, I felt like I was falling for him all over again—and also like I’d loved him forever.
“Stay with me, Theo,” I whispered softly, desperately, as he rolled his hips over mine in smooth, sinuous motions that had me writhing beneath him. I wanted to come and I wanted to hang on to this feeling forever, this dangling-over-the-edge feeling right before the euphoria of jumping off.
“Always.” He moved a little faster, thrust a little deeper. “God, I missed this. Your skin. Being inside you. Feeling you come.”
“Yes, yes…” I struggled to free my hands so I could touch him but he had them pinned to the mattress.
“Come for me. Now. Now…” His words fell away, becoming strangled breaths, and I matched his rhythm, rocking my hips beneath his, hearing the crescendo of our cries, watching the room beyond him turn to liquid gold, until there was nothing in the world but this, this, this, this, this.
This moment. This magic. This healing.
This feeling of belonging and acceptance.
This knowing I am yours and you are mine.
It was real. It was ours. It was love.
And it would always be enough.
Eight Months Later
Theo
* * *
“See you tonight.” I kissed her cheek like I did every day before leaving for work. This would be nothing like any other day, but she didn’t know that.
“Bye, love. Have a good day.” She smiled at me, and my heart stuttered a time or two.
She had no idea.
No idea how much I adored her, no idea how many times a day I thought of her, no idea how happy I’d been when she’d asked me to live with her over the summer.
And she really had no idea I was going to propose to her today.
It had taken some planning, but I’d had help—from her friends, from her principal, and especially from her students. I’d been trying to think of a clever way to ask her to marry me for two months. When she mentioned the fairy tale project, I knew it would be perfect.
As I walked out the door and down the porch steps, I laughed to myself. She didn’t have a clue. It was so perfect.
I stuck my hand in my pocket, wrapping my fingers around the ring box. Talk about not having a clue—I’d gone to the jewelry store by myself at first, but had gotten overwhelmed immediately. A phone call to Jaime had fixed that. In exchange for promising to tell her exactly when and where I was planning to propose, she gave me some direction.
“Claire is traditional but artsy,” she’d said. “Tell the jeweler you want something pretty and feminine but strong.”
In the end, I’d chosen a princess cut diamond in a floating halo style, and sent Jaime a picture of it.
It’s perfect, she’d texted back. Claire is going to love it!
That was all that mattered.
In the last eight months, she’d brought more joy to my life than I even realized was possible. She was patient and kind and forgiving, even when I struggled with episodes of doubt or anxiety. Those had grown less frequent, and in fact, I hadn’t experienced one at all since the beginning of fall. She listened when I wanted to talk, pushed me to open up when I’d rather shut down, and helped me see the past with better perspective. She made me excited about the future, which for the first time I could see clearly. I knew exactly where I wanted to be when I looked ahead, and I wanted her right beside me.
Today was a giant step in that direction.
After glancing in the back of my car to make sure my clothes were there, I took off down the street as if I was heading for work. In reality, I was headed for Aaron’s house, where I’d change out of my work jeans and boots and into something a little nicer. Then I’d head over to her school.
I couldn’t stop smiling.
* * *
Claire
* * *
“OK, places please! Boys and girls, did you hear me? Places!” I clapped my hands, trying to corral Elyse’s fourth graders into a line near the mic I’d set up in front of the stage in the gym. They’d been studying folklore and had written their own fairy tale, and in art class, we’d painted scenery for it, complete with a tower for their princess. Tomorrow they’d act it out live for parents, and today was sort of the “dress rehearsal.” But the kids were being unusually goofy, giggling and jumping around and whispering behind their hands into one another’s ears. Elyse had no experience with staging a play, so I’d taken the lead.
At least, I was trying to.
I used my strict teacher voice. “You have until I count to three to get in line and be quiet or you’re not performing. One.” There was a mad dash for the line. “Two.” The line straightened out. “Three.” Finally, I could hear myself talk.
“OK. Characters, you need to go backstage with me. Narrators, you should be lined up according to speaking order. If you don’t have your script memorized, you can use it to read.” I turned the narrators over to Elyse, and took the kids playing the roles of characters backstage. “You all have your lines memorized?” I asked. None of them held scripts.
“Yes,” they chorused before a few of them collapsed into giggles. One girl hit a giggler next to her, shushing her loudly.
I shook my head. “Jeez, what is with you guys today? OK, I think we’re ready to start. Princess, go on up.” I gestured toward the step-ladder, which was hidden by a cardboard “tower” painted to look like it was made of stone and covered with vines. “Prince, you go to the other side of the stage and wait in the wings. Witches, wizards, and toads, you stay here.” When everyone was in place, I called out to their teacher. “We’re ready back here!”
“Ms. French! Ms. French!” The princess came down from the stepladder and hopped from one foot to the other. “I have to go to the bathroom really bad!”
I sighed and took her script. “OK go, I’ll fill in for you. But hurry up.”
She took off, I climbed the tower, and the curtain went up.
A female narrator began. “Once upon a time, there was a handsome prince named Prince Theo. He was the handsomest, braves
t knight in the land.”
I made a face. Prince Theo? Had they changed his name? That was a coincidence. I glanced at the script, which read Prince Verlander.
A male narrator continued. “Prince Theo had an older brother who stood to inherit their father’s kingdom, so Prince Theo was free to roam the land, slaying dragons, defeating evil wizards, and searching for a princess to rescue.”
What? Where were we? I looked at the second page of the script, but I couldn’t find the lines the narrators were reading. Had they completely rewritten the tale? When I looked up again, I gasped.
Theo—my Theo—was standing onstage wearing the crown the kids had made for the prince and carrying the prince’s jeweled cardboard sword.
A few giggles could be heard in the gym. I blinked a few times and made eye contact with him—he winked.
My heart raced. What on earth was going on?
“Although the prince was the handsomest, cleverest, bravest knight in the land,” a female narrator went on.
“Did you say handsome?” Theo interrupted loudly, striking a valiant pose. “Don’t forget handsome.”
The kids and grownups in the gym roared with laughter. I glanced at the crowd and noticed the principal, assistant principal, office staff, and several fellow teachers had gathered in the gym as well.
“Yes, I did,” the girl said with a giggle. “Although the prince was the handsomest, cleverest, bravest knight in the land, he was not truly happy.”
Theo spoke loudly and dramatically. “Alas, although I have every gift nature can bestow, I have never rescued a princess, therefore I am lonely and sad.”
A new narrator stepped up. “The prince decided he would search far and wide until he found a princess who needed rescuing.”
Theo pretended to ride a horse around the stage, peeking around corners and behind the scenery. “Hello? Any princesses in there? If anyone needs to be rescued, call 1-800-Handsome Prince.” I laughed along with the kids, shaking my head in disbelief.
Another student continued. “One day, Prince Theo happened upon a castle in the woods, and it had a stone tower on one end. He’d heard the most beautiful princesses always reside in such towers, so he called out in greeting.”
Theo approached my tower. “Excuse me! Is there a fair maid inside this castle?”
Before I could answer, the narrator went on. “The most beautiful lady the prince had ever seen came to the window. Her name was Princess Claire.”
Theo dropped to his knees. “In all the heavens, I have never seen a star shine so brightly as you, fair maid. Should you fall from the sky, I shall gladly catch you.” He held out his arms, and I covered my mouth as the narrator continued.
“To the prince’s dismay, the princess he had discovered did not need to be rescued. But she said she would be glad to be his friend.”
A new reader stepped up to the mic. “The Prince, being so clever—”
“And handsome,” added Theo loudly.
“And handsome,” the girl added with a grin, “knew that this was the princess for him, and if she would not consent to being rescued, he had to win her over another way.”
“Aha!” Theo stuck a finger in the air and addressed the audience. “I will make her fall in love with me! I will give her a magic potion!” He turned back to me. “Come down from your tower, Princess Claire! I should like to share something with you!” Beckoning for me to come down, he gave me a smile that was real.
I backed down the ladder and took his hand, letting him lead me to center stage. “I can’t believe this,” I whispered.
“Just wait,” he said under his breath. Then he pretended to present me with something. “Would you like a snack?”
“The prince always carried around magic marshmallow puffs in case he had to make anyone fall in love with him,” a student read, “but he had never used them on anyone before.”
“Eat one,” whispered Theo, his eyes twinkling.
I pretended to take a bite. “Mmmmm. Delicious!”
Theo grinned widely, giving the audience a wink.
“As expected, Princess Claire fell madly in love with Prince Theo. He did not feel bad about tricking her because he loved her so much and knew he would make her happy.”
I played along, resting my chin on the backs of my hands and batting my eyelashes at him. But when Theo got down on one knee, I dropped the act, my hands going to my cheeks.
“Princess Claire,” he said loud enough for everyone to hear. “You are without a doubt the loveliest, kindest, dearest princess in the land. Alas, I have no kingdom to offer you. No subjects to rule. No castle of my own. But if you would do me the honor of becoming my wife, I should be very happy to stay here in your castle and stop roaming the land being so handsome and clever and brave all the time. I will devote myself to slaying dragons only for you. I will protect you and cherish you forever.” He reached into his back pocket, pulled out a small black box, and opened it up.
My breath stopped. My heart boomed. My eyes blinked. It was the most beautiful ring I’d ever seen, and it sparkled as it caught the light.
“Princess Claire, will you marry me?”
The entire gym was hushed.
With tears in my eyes, I spoke softly. “Yes.”
“Louder, princess. They can’t hear you in the back,” Theo said.
“Yes!” I cried, flapping my hands and jumping up and down. “Yes!”
The entire gym erupted with cheers and applause as Theo slipped the ring on my finger. When he got to his feet, I threw my arms around his neck, knocking off his cardboard crown. He lifted me right off the stage, wrapping his arms around me and swinging me from side to side as I cried with joy.
When he set me back on my feet and let go, he had tears in his eyes too.
“And as you can guess,” said someone in the microphone, “they lived happily ever after!”
* * *
“Your face was the best!” Jaime cried, clapping her hands. We were all at dinner that night to celebrate the engagement—Theo and I, Jaime and Quinn, and even Margot and Jack. Unbeknownst to me, Jaime and Quinn had been in the gym, too, along with Aaron and Josie.
Margot was sorry she’d missed it, but she was ten weeks pregnant and had terrible morning sickness these days. “Were you in total shock?” she asked.
“I was,” I admitted. “I had no idea.”
“I knew,” Jaime said, “and oh my God, it was so hard not to let it slip.”
“So who wrote the script?” Margot wondered. “The kids?”
“Nope, I did.” Theo smiled. “And I gave it to the fourth grade teacher. She just told them about it this morning.”
“Those poor kids.” I shook my head. “No wonder they were so squirrelly. And I can’t believe Elyse managed to keep that secret either!”
“Let me see the ring again.” Jaime took my hand and sighed over it. “So beautiful. You did great, Theo.”
He kissed my cheek. “Much better than I ever thought possible.”
I smiled at him as my heart beat fast with love and pride and excitement. Theo was nothing like the prince I’d thought I wanted, but he was everything I needed, now and ever after.
* * *
THE END
Acknowledgments
I am so grateful to the following people:
Becca Mysoor, book fairy and friend. This book is so much better because of you.
Kayti McGee, Laurelin Paige, and Sierra Simone, my sister snatches. Nobody gets past my INTJ RBF like you do.
To Jenn Watson, publicist and friend. Thanks for minding the nest again.
To Melissa Gaston, PA extraordinaire. You make my life so much easier.
To Candi, Nina, Sarah, and the entire Social Butterfly team, you’re amazing. Thanks for all you do!
To Erin Remaley for answering my questions about art and generously letting me steal her “altered book” idea! Her work can be seen here: https://www.instagram.com/after_midnight_ink/
To Tamara Matay
a for keeping my verb tenses consistent, my “wells” and “justs” under control, and all unintentional decapitations out of my books.
To Laura Foster Franks, for fast proofing. I never give anyone enough time!
To Rebecca Friedman, for always being a champion and soundboard for me.
To my fellow authors who were so generous with their advice and support while I wrote this book: Lauren Blakely, Helena Hunting, Staci Hart, Ilsa Madden-Mills, Nicola Rendell, Meghan March, and all the Shop Talkers. I’m learning so much from you.
To Margaret Provenzano, for being the kindest soul on earth.
To the PQs, for all your support and inspiration.
To my Harlots, for being the best fans around. I adore you!
To the bloggers and event organizers who work so tirelessly, all for the love of books. I appreciate every single one of you.
To my readers, you’re always on my mind. I hope I made you smile today.
Finally, thank you to my husband, children, and parents, who understand why I’m not always there, even when I’m there. I love you.
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