No Shame: The Complete Series: Including exclusive bonus materials and deleted scenes

by Phoenix, Nora

  Noah slowly lowered his hand, which had flown to his mouth in disbelief at watching the news. How the fuck was this possible?

  “Did you know about this?”

  Noah turned around, startled by Wells’ voice. “What?”

  Wells pointed toward the TV. “Did you know about this?”

  Noah frowned. “How the fuck would I have known?”

  Wells seemed to study him for a bit before he shrugged. “I dunno, but it seems mighty convenient that you’re here when that went down. It’s the perfect alibi.”

  Did he really think Noah had something to do with this? Those assholes were shot from…

  He stopped mid-track in his thoughts. Could it be? No, he was in the closed ward of a psych hospital. There was no way. Was there?

  “You invited me here, remember? And it was about what happened in Kansas, not about this. I’m only now seeing this.”

  Wells gestured for him to sit down and took a seat across from him. “This means freedom for Indy,” he said. “The three guys killed were the only ones with a motive to go after him. Jeremy Fitzpatrick, the old guy, is dying. He has days at most. They’ve arrested all lower-level lieutenants. If Indy testifies against them, he’ll bring them all down.”

  Noah’s head was about to explode with all the thoughts assaulting him at the same time. “What about the contract on his head?”

  Wells shook his head. “That was guaranteed by Duncan. Now that he’s gone, there’s no one to pay out. The lieutenants don’t have access to the funds. These guys, they’re in it for the money. They’ll stop looking for him, I guarantee you.”

  “Holy fuck, he’s free,” Noah said. A gulf of emotion rolled over him, making it hard to breathe. “He’s finally free.”

  * * *

  Indy had run for hours until he was too exhausted to move anymore. He’d made his way across fields, following dirt tracks and country roads, heading south. That little compass in his backpack had sure come in handy.

  His usual strategy was to head for a big city and get lost amongst the masses, but this was Kansas. There were no big cities, not for miles, anyways. Dodge City had to be closest, since he’d seen signs when they drove him in, but even that had to be tens of miles away. He wouldn’t be able to reach it before sunset, and he was sure as hell not spending a night outside here. Fuck knew what kind of animals roamed these fields. No, he had to think of a way to make it to Dodge City, one that didn’t involve walking.

  Fuck, he wished he had his female clothes. He felt too exposed without them, especially after that broadcast. Then again, this was a long way from Boston. Would they even have shown that on the news here? Plus, by now that was months ago. No one would remember, most likely. The only people who were looking for him were Duncan’s men, the guys who had attacked the farm. And the odds of running into them in broad daylight on a country road somewhere in the southwest of Kansas were small. No, they’d still be hiding, knowing law enforcement was hunting them down.

  He’d have to take his chances. He had no money, no ID, and food and water that would last him a couple of days at best. If he didn’t find a solution soon, he would be fucked. Maybe in Dodge City he could find a way to contact Noah.

  Even the thought of him made Indy’s heart contract painfully. Fuck, he missed him so damn much. He pushed back the thought. Thinking of Noah was a luxury he couldn’t afford right now. He had to get the fuck out of there.

  A truck appeared on the horizon, and he made his decision. When he raised his thumb in the universal hitchhiking gesture, the truck came to a slow stop. The driver, a fifty-something guy with a long, brown beard, gestured for him to get in. He pulled himself up, opened the door and climbed in.

  “Howdy, son,” the driver said with a friendly smile. “Whatcha doing here by yourself?”

  Indy’s eyes fell on the small pictures taped to his dashboard. School pictures of two girls and a boy. The man was a dad. He could work with that.

  “My stepfather kicked me out, sir,” Indy lied. He let his shoulders hunch. “He didn’t like my momma giving me attention, I guess. She’s a wonderful mom, but she can’t see him for the monster he is.”

  The man gave him a sympathetic look. “That’s a tough situation to be in, son. You got a place to go?”

  Indy nodded. “Yes, sir. I have family in Dodge City. I woulda called my aunt, but my stepdad took my phone. And all my money. But my aunt Jenny will take me in, I’m sure.”

  His eyes fell on the large tattoo on the driver’s right arm, depicting a curled-up snake with familiar words written underneath. Don’t tread on me. Now there was something he could definitely use.

  He lowered his voice, putting some sadness in it. “She’s my late dad’s sister, my aunt Jenny. He was a marine, my dad. Killed in action in Iraq.”

  “I’m sorry for your loss, son, but you should be proud of your dad and the sacrifice he made for this country.”

  “I am, sir. My dad is my hero.”

  The driver reached out with his meaty hand. “I’m Stan, and I’d be happy to drop you off anywhere in Dodge City.”

  Indy shook his hand. “Thank you so much. I’m Alex.”

  Seconds later, they were on their way, and he sighed with relief. It was almost four in the afternoon, and he was exhausted. The muscles in his legs were trembling with fatigue and overexertion, and his feet were killing him.

  Stan made small talk with the radio playing in the background, and Indy forced himself to respond, sticking to the persona he’d created.

  “I’m gonna listen to the news for a minute,” Stan announced. He turned up the radio.

  Indy’s stomach twisted. Would the attack be on the news? It was damn local, but surely the FBI would have tried to keep it under wraps, right? His hands got clammy as the news reader announced the first story, which was something about the president, thank fuck.

  “The Boston Police Department is still not coming forth with any information about the identity of the sniper who shot three men through a hotel window this morning. The three victims were top leaders in the notorious Fitzpatrick crime family and have been identified as Brian Fitzpatrick and his two sons Duncan and Alan. A police spokesperson stated the shooting is most likely related to the many crimes of this Boston mob family but refused to speculate about the identity of the shooter.”

  Blood rushed out of Indy’s head, and he wavered in his seat. Duncan was dead. Holy motherfucking hell, he was dead.

  Shot.

  By a sniper.

  Duncan was dead.

  “Stan, can you please… I’m sick…”

  Stan stopped the truck immediately, shooting Indy a worried look, but Indy was out of the cabin before the truck had even fully stopped. His stomach heaved violently, and he threw up on the shoulder. A tremor tore through his body as his stomach revolted again, and he deposited more on the side of the road.

  Indy wiped his mouth with the back of his hand as his stomach settled down. Duncan was dead. That son of a bitch was finally dead. Unbelievable.

  His lightheadedness lifted, and instead, a sense of euphoria rushed through his veins, even as tears started falling down his cheeks.

  He was free. For the first time since his mom had sold him to Duncan, he was free.

  Indy breathed in deeply, wiped the tears from his eyes, and straightened himself. A massive wave of longing hit him.

  Home.

  He was about to go home, to the one true home he’d ever had, with Noah and Josh and hopefully Connor.

  Finally.

  (To be continued in No Shame)

  Acknowledgments

  Three down, one to go. In hindsight, it may have been a little ambitious to publish four books back-to-back, but the support of so many people around made it possible.

  A first huge thanks to my readers, who constantly encourage me with their messages and emails. Every time I post a teaser, you guys go all “Gimme, gimme,” on me, and I love it. You make me feel special, and it’s the best feelin
g in the world.

  Sloan, I love this cover. Thanks for your hard work on this.

  Courtney, your editing rocks, both because of your smart advice and because of your hilarious remarks along the way.

  Kyleen, Michele, Amanda, and Tania: thanks for beta reading this book. I loved your feedback, and it helped make the book so much better. Tania, your scene-by-scene comments while you were reading were so awesome. I loved reading the book through your eyes!

  Last but not least, a big thanks to my ARC readers for reading and reviewing my book. Reviews matter SO much to self-published authors like me, so thanks for taking the time to leave a review.

  Bonus Chapter No Fear

  Note

  What follows is a bonus scene for No Fear that’s not part of the original book. This scene is unedited.

  Bonus Chapter No Fear

  Blake woke up with Aaron’s naked body splayed all over him, and he let out a soft sigh. It had been a week since Aaron had returned, and Blake woke up a few times every night to make sure Aaron was still in his arms. As soon as he felt that body touching him everywhere, a wave of relief would roll through him.

  Those weeks without Aaron had been hell. He hadn’t fully grasped how much he loved him and how much joy Aaron brought him until he’d been gone from his life. Blake had vowed to never fuck up like that again.

  Aaron stirred, his right hand moving along Blake’s chest as if he, too, wanted to make sure Blake was still there. Then those beautiful blue eyes opened, and his face broke open in a soft smile.

  “Hi.”

  “Hi, puppy. Did you sleep well?”

  Aaron stretched a little, then snuggled even closer to Blake, and Blake put a possessive hand on his puppy’s bare ass. “Mmm,” Aaron all but purred. “I did. I love waking up like this.”

  Blake kissed the top of his head. “Me too.”

  His hand petted Aaron’s ass, gently rubbing and squeezing, and Aaron immediately spread his legs. He almost always did that as soon as Blake touched his butt, his first instinct always to invite Blake in. Fuck, he loved that. He loved how Aaron craved his touch, communicating in every way he wanted everything Blake could give—and then some.

  Usually, Blake was on a schedule in the mornings, eager to get his daily workout in. But today was Sunday, and that meant they had all the time in the world.

  His fingers found Aaron’s crack, and his puppy let out a sigh. “I love it when you touch me there…” he whispered.

  He shifted so he was completely on top of Blake, his legs wide open so Blake had free access.

  “Touch you where, puppy? I wanna hear you say it.”

  Aaron had come far, and he was getting better at voicing his needs, but Blake was determined to keep pushing him out of his comfort zone.

  Aaron rubbed his cheek against Blake’s chest, then found his nipple and licked it.

  “Suck it,” Blake ordered him in a low voice.

  Aaron immediately latched on, alternating soft sucking with scraping the tender bud with his teeth.

  “The other one, too.”

  Blake loved how Aaron obeyed immediately. He’d noticed that even more since Aaron had come back, how he loved getting commands. Even little things Blake asked him to do, like this, brought him pleasure. And Blake, too. His cock was hard and leaking, ready for action. So was Aaron’s, smearing precum all over Blake’s body.

  “Where do you want me to touch you, puppy?”

  Aaron looked top, slowly letting go of Blake’s nipple. He pushed his ass back against Blake’s fingers, but they both knew that wasn’t gonna be enough.

  Aaron whimpered. “Please, Blake.”

  “I asked you a question. Where do you want me to touch you?” Blake made sure his voice sounded stern. Aaron had confided in him two days ago he loved it when Blake did that, that it made his belly go weak.

  “My ass…” It was little more than a whisper, but it was a start.

  “My hands are on your ass, don’t you feel that?” Blake petted both cheeks for good measure, biting back a smile when Aaron shamelessly spread his legs even further.

  Aaron let out a frustrated little growl, then reached for Blake’s right hand and took it. He brought it to his own mouth and sucked Blake’s index and middle finger in, wetting them till they were nice and moist.

  “Please, Blake…my hole…”

  His eyes were pleading with Blake, and how could he say no to that? Blake flipped him on him back with one move. “You’re such a good puppy.”

  He didn’t even need to tell Aaron to spread his legs, because he pulled them up, opening up wide for Blake. He dribbled a little extra spit on his fingers, then went straight for that perfect little pucker that was so eager for his touch.

  “Ungh,” Aaron moaned when Blake demanded entry.

  Blake didn’t have to wait long to be let in. Aaron bore down and greedily sucked two fingers in at once.

  He loved the burn, he’d told Blake after he’d had pressed for details. Aaron was anything but a pain slut in other areas and showed no interest in anything more than the occasional sharp slap on his butt—which was fine with Blake—but he had confessed he loved feeling his ass being stretched.

  “How’s that feel?” Blake asked, gently stretching Aaron’s channel with his fingers.

  “Mmmm…”

  “Is this enough for you, or do you want more?”

  “More…”

  “Do you want my cock, puppy?”

  This time, Aaron’s answer came swift. “Always. I always want you. I love you.”

  Blake heart skipped a beat. “Oh, puppy, I love you so much.”

  With regret, he pulled back his fingers, smiling when Aaron let out a disappointed grunt. “I got you… I just need lube, baby,” he shushed him, quickly rolling over to grab the lube from the night table.

  Within seconds, he had coated his cock. When he rolled back, Aaron’s eyes radiated such want and love, that Blake had to kiss him. He just had to. His heart was so full of all these feelings that it felt like it would explode if he didn’t let some of it out.

  His mouth was still plundering Aaron’s, when his cock found the way home, pushing against Aaron’s hole. Blake didn’t even get the chance to help himself line up, because Aaron reached between them and positioned Blake perfectly, then impatiently urged Blake to move.

  He never broke off the kiss as he slowly slid in. Aaron sighed into his mouth, and Blake’s insides went all soft. His puppy was so honest and open in his reactions, without any filter whatsoever. Blake loved reading every emotion on his face, hearing every little sound of pleasure, feeling Aaron’s body tremble with want under his own much stronger body.

  Blake pulled back from Aaron’s lips. He was completely engulfed in Aaron’s hot body, and a little shudder danced down his spine. “Tell me how you want me… Slow or fast? Soft or hard and rough?”

  Aaron’s eyes glazed over as he bit his lip. Blake wanted patiently, staying completely still.

  “Blake?” Aaron finally whispered, his eyes finding Blake.

  “Yeah, puppy.”

  “I want you to own me. I don’t want to choose. I want you to do whatever you want with me.”

  Blake’s eyes unexpectedly misted over. How had he ever gotten so lucky to be the recipient of so much trust and love? “Are you feeling needy today, little Aaron?”

  Aaron nodded, then bit his lip again. “Is that okay?”

  “Yes, puppy, it’s more than okay. Thank you for telling me. I’ll take good care of you, I promise.”

  All this time, he’d been buried deep inside Aaron, unmoving. He was dying to move, but things needed to be said first. Aaron needed to know it was okay, that whatever he was feeling was okay, and that Blake would do anything to make him happy.

  “Here’s what we’re gonna do, puppy. First, I’m gonna fuck you really deep until you come, but when you do, I’m gonna keep going, ‘cause you need at least two rounds to satisfy that craving in your hole, don’t you?”r />
  Aaron nodded with an adorable serious look on his face.

  “Remember that cute little plug we bought for you, the one with the little tail? Right after I fill you up, I’m gonna plug you, so you’ll feel me inside you all day. I think that will make you feel really special and close to me, right?”

  Another nod and Aaron’s eyes were starting to sparkle.

  “And then I’m gonna crank up the heating, so it’s nice and warm in my bedroom, and you’re gonna stay here all day. Naked. I want you to wear nothing else but your collar and leash and your plug.”

  Aaron was all but drooling now, his cheeks flushed and his eyes open wide, and a rush of excitement filled Blake that he’d read his puppy’s needs correctly.

  “We’re gonna lounge in bed, with you at my feet or snuggled up against me. And if you’re a good puppy, you get treats. How does that sound?”

  Aaron let out a happy squeal that Blake felt resonate deeply in his body. “I love you, Blake.”

  * * *

  Aaron had grown up imagining heaven as this floaty place where you drifted on a cloud amidst rainbows and sunny skies and gently strung a harpsichord, or something similarly. It had all seemed very ethereal, hard to see as something real—and even harder to get excited over. What was fun about floating for all eternity?

  Right now, if someone had asked him to share what he thought heaven was like, he would’ve described it completely differently. He would’ve tried to capture into words the deep bliss and contentment he experienced right here, right now, with Blake. His heart was completely at peace, his mind free from the worries that tended to plague him.

  Blake hadn’t fucked him; he’d made love to him, driving Aaron to the brink of insanity by worshiping his body and giving him what he craved on a level he couldn’t even verbalize. Filled with two loads of Blake’s cum, Aaron had been plugged. It was dirty, and the tail should feel demeaning, maybe, but it didn’t. It felt wonderfully right and perfect, his slick hole constantly reminding him who he belonged to. Who he had chosen to belong to.