Shouldn’t Want Him
Page 4
“So much better.” His head rolls to the side as he stares out the window for a moment, then he blinks and focuses on me again. “This feels like a dream, Garrick. And if it is a dream? I really don’t wanna wake up yet.”
“You’re not dreaming, beautiful,” I say. “This is real life, and it’s only going to get better. I promise, okay?”
He nods. “I believe you.”
“Good,” I lean in and give him a quick kiss before returning to my own seat. “You’re mine now, and I’m going to take care of you. You don’t need to worry about anything.”
He nods again, but I can see it in his eyes that there’s something more. He might trust me, but that trust doesn’t erase everything that’s happened over the past couple of days.
This trip is a means for us both to get away, to get our minds off everything we’re leaving behind, but there’s no escaping the fact that we’ll have to go back sometime.
Just like there’s no escaping the harsh reality that will still be there waiting for us.
6
Dusty
I’ve honestly felt like I was living a dream—or someone else’s life, at the very least—all day long. Waking up with Garrick was the perfect start to my day, and I would have been completely happy to have stayed there in his arms until it was time to fall asleep again.
But he has somehow managed to improve upon that perfection at every turn.
He made breakfast—well, brunch, really.
He whisked me away on his private jet. I shake my head at the thought. How is this my life, again?
“You okay, babe?” he asks, taking my hand and pulling me in close as we walk across the cavernous hotel lobby. “You look like something is bothering you.”
I smile up at him as we step into the elevator. “I’m so good,” I say, meaning it. “I was honestly just thinking about how this day keeps getting better and better. I don’t know how you’re going to top the jet ride.”
He laughs, then tosses me a wink before planting a kiss on the side of my head. “The day isn’t over yet, beautiful.”
Before I even have time to wonder what he could be hinting at, the elevator doors open and we’re standing in the foyer of what feels like a whole world away from the busy lobby we’ve just left behind.
Everywhere I look, there is gold and silver, marble and mirrors. There is a huge basket of lilies and white roses sitting on a glass table in the center of the room, and it feels like we’re in some sort of Greek temple.
“This is just the foyer,” he whispers, a hint of laughter in his voice. “If you like this, you’re going to love the rest of the suite.”
The foyer is at least twice the size of my dorm room back at school, and I can barely wrap my head around the idea that there’s more—bigger and better and just for us—straight ahead through the columned archway.
It’s also hard to believe that my dad and Garrick do business together. Well, that they used to do business together. Right now, it’s hard to believe they even live on the same planet.
My family has some money. We’re comfortable, for sure.
But this?
This is on a whole other level.
And Garrick is somehow acting like it’s all just perfectly normal. Like this is just another day in his life.
“This is crazy,” I say out loud, before I can stop myself. We walk through to what would probably be called the living room if we were in a normal house, but here in this crazy fantasy-land penthouse? I’m sure it’s a drawing room or a sitting room or—
“And this is the music room,” Garrick says, looking over his shoulder as he walks over to the baby grand piano and taps on the keys. “Do you play?”
I shake my head. “A few lessons when I was younger, but nothing you would want to hear.”
“I want to hear it all, sexy,” he winks. “But only when you’re ready.” He motions for me to follow. “Come on, we’ve still got a lot of ground to cover before we make it to the bedroom.”
Just the mention of the bedroom has my body responding. God, how is it that I’ve turned into some kind of sex addict over the past couple of days? It seems like my cock is always hard now, like I spend half my day readjusting and doing my best to hide my ever-present erection.
It’s sort of like going through puberty all over again, except without the awkwardness and acne.
Well, without the acne, at least.
He leads me through to the actual living room, where there’s a TV that takes up most of one wall and sliding doors that lead out to what looks like an enormous rooftop patio, then through the office and dining room. There’s at least three bathrooms that are each larger than the last, and I’m pretty sure I saw a sauna in one of them.
And then, finally, there’s the bedroom.
“This is where the tour ends, I’m afraid.” He says it as if that could possibly be a bad thing. “What do you think so far?”
I blurt out the first thing that pops into my head. “I think I don’t ever want to go back home.”
He laughs. “It is pretty nice, isn’t it?” He pulls me close and kisses me as his hands roam up and down my back. “But having you here with me makes it perfect.”
God, I could so get used to hearing him talk to me like this. Like I’m the only thing in the world that matters.
It would be too easy to let it go to my head, but I still haven’t quite convinced myself that it’s not just another part of the dream, the fantasy that really is too good to be true.
I take a step closer to him and lean in for a quick kiss. “Now that we’re here in the bedroom,” I begin, reaching for the top button of his shirt, “what should we do?”
He grins. “Have I ever told you I like the way you think?” Then he inhales and exhales slowly, taking my hands in his—and away from their task fiddling with his buttons. “But we’ll have to pick back up with that idea a little later. Right now, we need to freshen up and get dressed for dinner.”
“I, um… does that mean we’re going somewhere nice?” I cringe at how dumb the question sounds as the words leave my mouth, but I need to know. “Because I’m not sure I brought anything nice enough for—”
“Babe,” he silences me with a smile and a gentle finger at my lips. “What did I tell you before? Trust me. I’ll take care of you.” He nods toward the closet. “There. Go look.”
I want to ask more questions, but my curiosity gets the better of me. Still, I give him a questioning look over my shoulder as I cross the enormous room to get to the equally enormous closet.
The first thing I notice is that it’s literally a whole other room, with a big center island and wall-to-wall mirrors, and a couple of really plush chairs—because getting dressed in here has to be a full-time thing, right?
But the second thing I notice is the rack of clothes. Button-downs, t-shirts, jeans, slacks—even a row of shoes—all in colors and styles that look very un-Garrick-like.
“I don’t understand,” I say, reaching out to flip through the hanging shirts. There are so many, and I can tell just at a glance that they’re a lot more expensive than anything I have back home. “Is this all—”
“All for you,” he finishes, stepping up behind me and planting a kiss on my neck. “I called ahead and gave them some measurements. Hopefully everything will fit. If not, we’ll get more.”
“These are all my size?” I ask, turning to look at him. “You know my measurements?”
He laughs. “Well, no. To be honest, I just told them you were about 5’10” and sexy. They did the rest.”
I eye him suspiciously, thinking there was probably a little more to it than that. Still, this is the nicest thing anyone has ever done for me—and also so over-the-top that I don’t even know what to say.
“Thank you,” I begin, shaking my head. “You really shouldn’t have done all this. It’s… it’s too much, Garrick.”
“Do you like it, though?”
I nod. “Of course, but—”
�
��Then it’s worth it,” he interrupts me with another kiss. “You’re worth it, babe.” He steps back and motions toward the clothes before I can say anything else. “Now, try on a button-down and some slacks for me, beautiful. Let me get a sneak peek before we go out.”
I can only smile and nod again. How can I argue?
He’s giving me everything I want—things I don’t even realize I want—and asking nothing in return. He even thinks I’m worth it.
I’m sure he’ll come to his senses at some point, but for now?
Maybe I can live in this fantasy world for just a little while longer. Just a few more days, at least.
* * *
I ease back in my chair and look across the table, too full of delicious food to even remember how many courses we’ve had.
More than I needed, for sure.
But it’s been nice being here with him, just sitting and talking about everything and nothing in particular.
No business talk.
No worries.
No stress.
“What are you thinking about?” he asks, quirking an eyebrow and making me realize I’ve been staring.
“I, um…” I clear my throat to stall for a second. Is the truth too cheesy? Probably. But I can’t think of a good lie, either, so… “I was just thinking about how nice it is to be here with you.”
God.
Yeah, it sounds even cheesier out loud.
But it is the truth, and he did ask.
“It is nice, isn’t it?” He smiles. “I’m glad you agreed to come here with me. I think we both needed to get away for a while.”
I nod. What we need is to get away for a long time. Forever, preferably. Or at least long enough to forget everything that’s waiting for us back home.
“You’re frowning again,” he says. “Are you sure everything is okay, Dusty? I promise I’ll do what I can to make things right when we get home. I know coming here really didn’t fix anything, but—”
“No, it’s not that,” I say, pushing aside my thoughts and forcing a smile. “I just…” Well, okay. I guess it was that, if I’m being honest. But I don’t want to spoil the amazing night we’ve had by talking about things we can’t change right now. “So… why me?”
I nearly clamp my hand over my mouth as the question comes out. Because yeah, putting him on the spot is a much better plan than talking about our problems.
God, when will I learn to actually think before I speak? Isn’t that something that’s supposed to come with being an adult?
“I’m sorry,” I say, hoping the surprised look on Garrick’s face doesn’t make him think I’m ungrateful. “I really do love being here with you, and I didn’t mean to sound… well, I didn’t mean to ask that at all, honestly.”
“Why you?” he repeats, giving me a look that’s a cross between curiosity and amusement. “Like I told you earlier—because you’re worth it. And because you’re mine.”
“But why?” I ask, because apparently there’s still a short-circuit between my mouth and my brain. “I mean… why do you care? You don’t have to do any of this—and… and you were ready to fire me a couple of days ago.”
There.
It’s all out in the open now.
At least I’m pretty sure that’s all of it. If I do have any other questions, I’m sure they’ll come flying out before too long, since that’s apparently how I handle things now.
Is it wildly inappropriate to ask these kinds of questions right after the man has just paid for one of the best meals I’ve ever had?
Yep.
Absolutely.
But I have to admit that I do feel a little better just getting those questions off my chest. I may not like the answers he’s about to give me, but at least I’ll know, and that has to count for something.
Right?
“I was getting ready to fire you,” he says, finally. “You’re right about that. But that has nothing to do with what we’re doing here—or maybe it has everything to do with it…”
I can feel my eyebrows knit together. Maybe this isn’t a conversation I want to have right now, after all. But the cat is out of the bag, and it’s not like I can just pretend like I didn’t just point-blank ask him for the truth.
“I, um… I guess I don’t follow,” I say, when he doesn’t immediately elaborate.
“Sorry,” he grins. “I’m just working through it all in my head. I hadn’t really thought about it too much aside from the fact that I saw you, I wanted you, and I went after you.”
“But if you wanted me, why did you also want to fire me?” I ask. “I’m sorry. I swear I’m not trying to put you on the spot here, but… I just can’t help but wonder what makes me so special? Why are you willing to risk so much to be with me when you can have anyone else you want?”
Okay, so maybe now it’s all out on the table.
I didn’t realize I had all these doubts lingering inside my head, but now I can’t seem to stop myself from asking every needy question that pops up.
“Maybe I could have someone else,” he says with a shrug. “But I don’t want anyone else. I want you. I wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you. That’s why I had to get rid of you—well, that and because you were late on your first day.” He grins. “Seriously, though. I knew if I gave in to the temptation, there would be no turning back. Once I let myself go there, that was it for me.”
I open my mouth to speak again, but he raises a hand to cut me off.
“Wait,” he says. “There’s something else you asked that I want to answer. You are special, Dusty. And yeah, maybe I’ve put a business—and personal—relationship on the line to be with you, but haven’t you done the same? Is it worth it? Only time will tell, but I think it is. For me, it’s simple. I’m all in. I want you.”
“Okay,” I say, my voice barely above a whisper. His answer is so much more than I expected, maybe even more than I deserve, especially after the way I blurted out the rapid-fire questions. “Thank you. Hearing you say all those things means a lot to me. And even though it’s honestly hard for me to believe, I do believe you. I trust you.”
“That’s all I ask,” he smiles. “Trust me. We’re in this together now, and I don’t give a damn what anyone else thinks. As long as you’re happy, so am I. And if you’re not happy? We’ll talk about it. We’ll fix it. We’ll do whatever we have to do. I promise.”
“I do believe,” I say, finally feeling calm and secure for the first time in… well, in a long, long time. “And I am happy. You make me happy.”
It’s simple, but it’s true.
Being with Garrick makes me happy. Knowing he cares, knowing he wants me?
It’s the best feeling in the world.
And now that I know where we stand, I’m confident in one more thing—I’m all in, too.
“Well,” he says, exhaling slowly. “Now that we’ve got that established, how about dessert?”
I groan. “I seriously don’t think I could eat another bite. But if there’s something you wanted…?”
“I’ve already got everything I want,” he says, tossing me a wink. “Besides, we can always order something from room service if we change our minds later.”
“Great.” I blush at the words that are about to come out of my mouth, but I say them anyway. “And now that you mention it, I can think of something we can do in the room that’s even better than dessert.”
I don’t even care if it makes me sound greedy. I want him.
I want him tonight.
I want him now.
I want him naked.
He motions for the check without hesitating. “Fuck,” he murmurs. “I love the way you think.”
* * *
Seeing the heat in Garrick’s eyes has me so horny that I can barely keep my hands to myself in the elevator up to the penthouse suite.
Okay, that’s a lie.
I’m completely failing at keeping my hands to myself.
“Damn, babe,” he growls, pulling me close f
or a kiss and pressing his insistent erection against me just as the elevator doors open into the glittering foyer. “See what you do to me? So hard for you.”
I reach down and palm his length through his pants, licking my lips as he moans and grinds against my palm.
“Thank God we didn’t stay for dessert,” he says. “I don’t think I could have waited any longer to get you naked.”
He pulls me out of the elevator and kisses me again, practically carrying me into the bedroom. I quickly unbutton my shirt and shrug out of it without being told to, tossing it aside quickly so I can finish undressing.
“Wait,” he catches my wrists and shakes his head. “I love how eager you are, beautiful. But this is my favorite part.” He unfastens my belt and the button on my pants, then pauses. “The teasing. The anticipation.” My pants fall down to pool around my ankles and he takes my hand as I step out of them. “And then… the reveal.”
I suck in a sharp breath as he pulls my underwear down in one smooth motion, my cock leaping out and so close to his hand that I can’t help but thrust my hips forward in the hope that he’ll take the hint.
“My eager boy,” he laughs. “So sexy. And so ready for me, slick with pre-cum.” He reaches out and wraps a warm, strong hand around my cock, giving it a couple of quick strokes that pull a porn-worthy moan from my lips. “But you’re going to have to hold on for me, okay?”
“Yes, okay,” I answer, ready to agree to just about anything as long as he keeps stroking me. But then my brain catches up, and I can’t stop myself from frowning as he takes his hand away. Still, I know he’s going to make me feel good eventually, so I try to stifle the whimper that’s struggling to get out.
I just hope he hurries. I don’t know how much longer I can wait before anticipation turns into torture.
He eases me back onto the bed, gently pushing me down before taking a step back. “Jesus, you’re so fucking hot.” His eyes roam up and down my body. “I can’t wait to feel that sweet ass grip my cock.”
“Yes,” I pant, scrambling back on the bed and spreading my legs wide for him. “I want that, too. I need it. Please…”