Lily Steps Up

by Judi Curtin

  Lady Mary is very sweet and gentle, but as she continued to speak, I realised that when she needed to, she could be as tough as iron. ‘He told me that Johanna left the workhouse two years ago, and that she found employment as a maid.’

  ‘Where?’ I asked. ‘Where is she working? Can Nellie go there? Can she see her sister at last?’

  ‘Unfortunately it isn’t as easy as that,’ said Lady Mary. ‘Eventually the master showed me her record, and all it said was ‘Discharged to domestic service, County Sligo’.

  ‘But Sligo is huge,’ I said. ‘She could be anywhere.’

  But then I remembered that although Sligo is full of houses, most of them are small like Mam’s little cottage. Very few families had room for servants, or money to pay them.

  ‘I have already sent notes to all my friends in the county,’ said Lady Mary. ‘I have given them Johanna’s name, and I have asked them to forward the details to their friends too. I am confident that before too long we will know where Johanna is. Be brave, Nellie. I am sure that soon, you and your sister will be reu­nited.’

  As Lady Mary left the room, a young scullery maid came along the corridor. She was a new arrival at Lissadell, and very shy. When she saw Lady Mary coming out of our bedroom, she looked as if she had seen a ghost. I didn’t feel like explaining everything to her, so I stuck out my tongue, and she ran away as if I had hit her.

  I closed the door, and went to sit next to my friend.

  ‘All this has something to do with you, hasn’t it, Lily?’ she said. ‘Did you ask Lady Mary to find out about my sisters?’

  ‘Yes,’ I said. ‘I asked her to help. Nellie, I hope you’re not sorry. Do you wish you didn’t know about poor little Lizzie?’

  She shook her head. ‘No, I don’t wish that. I never really, truly expected to see Lizzie again, so any secret hopes I had weren’t real – and impossible hopes are no good at all. It’s better that I know the truth.’

  ‘You’re very brave.’

  ‘I don’t have a choice, do I? Sitting here and crying won’t make any difference.’

  ‘But now we know that Johanna is out there some­where, and Lady Mary won’t give up. She will find her, I know she will, and then … oh, Nellie, are you very excited at the thought of seeing your sister again?’

  As I said the words, I could see she wasn’t excited at all. Her life had been so terrible, she had learned not to dream of better times.

  ‘Let’s wait and see what happens.’

  I wouldn’t sleep until we found Johanna, and couldn’t understand how Nellie could bear to wait. Then I realised the truth – Nellie had spent most of her life waiting.

  Chapter Ten

  The next few weeks went by very slowly. I always tried to be in a corridor where I might see Lady Mary, and she must have wondered if I was fol­lowing her around the house. It didn’t matter anyway. Every time she saw me, she shook her head, and I knew she had no good news to share.

  One day Lady Mary came over to me as I was dusting the breakfast room. I was glad to see her, as I was bored from lifting up the many precious vases and ornaments, and dusting underneath them. How could one family need so many things? In our house there was only one holy picture over the fireplace.

  ‘Good morning, Lily,’ said Lady Mary. ‘I know you have been waiting for good news, but I am sorry to say that I have none. The last of my friends replied to me this morning, and she could not help. None of my friends, or their friends, has seen or heard of Johanna Gallagher. I am beginning to think that even if she were once in service in Sligo, she isn’t here any more.’

  I had a sick feeling in my stomach.

  Where could she be?

  If Johanna was gone from Sligo, how would we ever find her?

  Where would we even start to look?

  What if she had gone all the way to Dublin – or London – or New York?

  What if she had … died?

  Would Nellie ever know the truth?

  And how would she go on if she did?

  ‘I am sorry I couldn’t bring you any good news,’ said Lady Mary.

  ‘I understand,’ I said. ‘Thank you for helping, Lady Mary. I am grateful to you, and so is Nellie.’

  Lady Mary smiled at me, and I took my dusters and went back to Mrs Bailey to find out where I had to clean next.

  * * *

  The next day Maeve came back to stay, and I told her the story.

  ‘Poor Nellie,’ she said when I was finished. ‘There has to be a way to find out where Johanna is.’

  ‘Maybe there is a way,’ I said. ‘But I can’t think of it.’

  Suddenly she gave a huge smile. ‘I know, what to do!’ she said. ‘Uncle Joss has a book called Debrett’s Peerage – have you read it?’

  ‘No. What’s it about – and how will it help us to find Johanna?’

  ‘It’s a bit boring, actually, but grown-ups seem to like it. It’s a big fat book with lists of people and their families, and their titles – it probably tells you where they live too – it might tell us where Johanna lives. Let’s go and check right now. We can––’

  She headed for the door, but stopped when she saw I wasn’t following her.

  ‘What is it, Lily? Do you want me to ask Mrs Bailey if …?’

  ‘What kind of families are in that book?’ I asked. ‘Is your family in it?’

  ‘Yes, we are – and so is my friend Stella, and, well, all of the people we know.’

  ‘You mean people like you?’

  Her face went red. ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘I should have thought of that. It’s all about people like me.’

  I felt sorry for her. She was so protected, it was easy for her to forget how unequal the world was.

  But then she smiled again. ‘Maybe there’s a book like that for servants. We could ask Mrs Bailey – she’d know, wouldn’t she?’

  ‘No one cares enough about servants to write a whole book about them. If we’re lucky, we might get a job reference – and that’s the only thing anyone will ever write down about us.’

  ‘You must think I’m very foolish.’

  ‘No,’ I said. ‘I think you’re very kind, trying to find a way to help Nellie.’

  After that, I noticed that Maeve was extra-gentle whenever she saw Nellie. Nellie didn’t react though. She was going around as if she were wearing a mask – a mask that made her look as if she were a walk­ing, talking doll with no feelings at all. When I first arrived at Lissadell, Nellie had been grumpy and a little bit mean, but that was easier to cope with than the way she was now. I felt sorry for her – sorrier than I ever had for anyone, but sometimes I wanted to shake her, just to get a reaction, just so I could see that she was really alive.

  * * *

  Then one day Maeve came to me all flustered and excited.

  ‘I have great news!’ she said.

  ‘Is it Johanna?’ I asked. ‘Has Lady Mary found her? Where is she? Is someone going to bring her here?’

  ‘Oh no, Lily. I’m so sorry, the news is not about Johanna. It’s about me.’

  Maeve had so many things in her life. She travelled and went to garden parties and tennis afternoons and hunts and exhibitions. It was easy for her to forget about Nellie and her troubles. It wasn’t so easy for me though. Except for my days off, every day was the same. I had little to distract me as I scrubbed and cleaned, spending hours and hours with Nellie, never being able to forget how sad her life was.

  ‘What’s your good news, Maeve?’ I asked.

  ‘Now I’m ashamed to even say.’

  ‘Please say. I’d very much like to hear some good news.’

  ‘Mother is coming to see me. She will be here tomorrow.’

  ‘That is good news,’ I said. Even though visitors meant more work for Nellie and me, at least they brightened up the place a little. And Countess Mark­ievicz, with her eccentric ways usually brightened up the place a lot. ‘When will she be here?’

  ‘She arrives tomorrow evening, and leaves the nex
t day.’

  ‘That’s a short visit.’ I thought of all the work Nellie and I would have to do that evening, airing and dust­ing and preparing a room for Countess Markievicz – for one single day.

  ‘I know. Mother is very busy in Dublin, but she has to come here because she wants to borrow money from Uncle Joss.’

  ‘Will he give it to her?’

  ‘He usually does – even though the two of them don’t see eye to eye any more. He doesn’t approve of her political views, and her life in Dublin. I don’t know why he’s so embarrassed by her – she’s only fighting for a free and fair Ireland.’

  I didn’t know what to say to this. A free Ireland sounded like a good thing to me, but I’d heard men in my village saying that people like the Countess were only making trouble for everyone else.

  ‘I think Mother would like to stay here longer,’ she said. ‘But I’m afraid if she did, she and Uncle Joss would end up having the most terrible row.’

  ‘But only one single day!’ Once again I felt sorry for Maeve. I saw my mother once a week, but months and months could pass without Maeve seeing hers.

  Now Maeve gave a huge smile. ‘She’s only staying here at Lissadell for one day – but I will be leaving with her!’

  ‘She’s taking you to Dublin?’

  I knew that living in Dublin with her mother was Maeve’s dream, but where would that leave me? I would never see Maeve, and I would miss her so much. I could already imagine endless dreary days without her.

  Maeve shook her head. ‘No, Mother’s not taking me to Dublin. We are going visiting for a few days.’

  ‘Where?’ I knew I’d never live a life where I’d be driving around Sligo, staying with friends who lived in big houses, and I couldn’t help feeling a little jealous.

  ‘Who cares? Temple House in Ballinacarrow I think.’

  ‘That’s miles away,’ I said. ‘My friend Hanora’s aunt used to work near there and she only came home once a year.’

  ‘It’s not that far.’ Then I realised that distances are different when you have a motor car to carry you around the country.

  ‘We’ll be visiting someone Mother was friends with when she was a little girl,’ she said. ‘I suppose they will talk about the past, and be terribly boring.’

  I laughed. ‘I can’t imagine your mother being boring. Some of the stories you’ve told me make her sound very exciting.’ I didn’t mention that I’d heard other stories about Countess Markievicz from the footmen – ones that made my hair stand on end. They talked about her going on marches – and even being arrested!

  ‘Lily! Lily where have you got to?’

  It was Mrs Bailey and she sounded cross.

  ‘I have to go,’ I said. ‘Enjoy your mother’s visit, Maeve. I hope I will see her while she is here. It would be lovely.’

  But then I stopped talking. I dearly wanted to see the Countess again, but Maeve and I both knew that unless I passed the Countess in a corridor, I was unlikely to see her at all. It wasn’t as if I could sit down next to her and have a cup of tea and chat about her exciting life in Dublin.

  Maeve smiled. ‘I’ll try to arrange something,’ she said.

  Before I could ask what she meant, Mrs Bailey called me again, and I ran off to do my endless work.

  * * *

  ‘Oh dear,’ said Mrs Bailey later, as Nellie and I came back from cleaning the dressing rooms and laying out the towels. ‘What are we to do? We are already up in a heap because of the Countesses visit, and now this.’

  ‘What is it?’ I asked.

  ‘Teresa has vanished. No one has seen her for hours, and all her things are gone from her room.’

  I wasn’t sad to hear that Teresa was gone. She was never nice to me, and she thought she was great, just because she was maid to Lady Mary. Recently she had met a young man, and I had heard rumours that they planned to run off together. Now it seemed they were more than rumours.

  ‘It is a crisis,’ said Mrs Bailey. ‘Who will help Lady Mary to dress for dinner?’

  I smiled. My little sister Anne has been able to dress herself for ages, and Winnie can do everything except put on her stockings. Why couldn’t rich people do easy things like taking care of themselves, or cooking their dinner or lighting the fire?

  ‘You will have to do it, Nellie,’ said Mrs Bailey then. ‘As housemaid, you’re the person who should step up.’

  Nellie’s eyes opened wide in horror, as if Mrs Bailey had asked her to swim all the way to America.

  ‘Not me,’ she whispered. ‘I wouldn’t dare. I wouldn’t know how.’

  ‘Of course you can do it, Nellie,’ I said, trying to encourage her. ‘You dress yourself every morning don’t you? You never have a problem with that.’

  But poor Nellie didn’t reply. Her face had gone pale, and her hands were shaking.

  ‘Pull yourself together, child,’ said Mrs Bailey, though I feared what she was asking was impossible. Nellie looked ready to faint away.

  ‘I’ll do it,’ I said.

  Mrs Bailey gave a big sigh. ‘As under-housemaid it is not really appropriate, but in the circumstances, I suppose you will have to do. Now change into a fresh apron, and go at once to Lady Mary’s room. Nellie, I hear the drawing room bell ringing – go and see what is needed.’

  ‘Thank you, Lily,’ whispered Nellie as she ran off.

  ‘What are you waiting for, Lily?’ asked Mrs Bailey.

  Now I didn’t feel so confident. I knew all about dusting and sweeping and lighting fires and things like that – I didn’t know the first thing about being a lady’s maid.

  ‘What exactly am I supposed to … do?’ I asked.

  ‘Oh dear, Lily,’ said Mrs Bailey. ‘You’re such a com­petent girl, I sometimes forget how very young you are. Come in to the dining hall for a few minutes and I’ll tell you what you need to know.

  * * *

  In the servants’ dining hall, Mrs Bailey sat down, and I stood beside her with my hands clasped in front of me.

  ‘I was a lady’s maid once, you know – in my very first position in Galway. I took such pride in that work, I can tell you. My mistress was very, very pleased with me, and when she moved to London, she gave me the most glowing reference. I could have obtained a job anywhere in the country.’

  ‘I didn’t know that,’ I said politely, wondering if this conversation was going to be any help to me at all. Then Mrs Bailey remembered herself.

  ‘Anyway,’ she said. ‘For tonight all you will have to do is help Lady Mary with her hair and her clothes. You can manage that can’t you?’

  ‘Yes, Mrs Bailey.’

  ‘I haven’t had time to talk to Lady Mary yet, but I expect you’ll have to take over Teresa’s everyday duties until we can find a replacement – and who knows how long that will take?’

  Now I was very worried. ‘What exactly are those duties?’

  She took a deep breath. ‘You bring Lady Mary her first cup of tea in the morning – ask Cook how she likes it. You are to take care of her clothes – check what needs repairing, and see to that – at least you are capable with a needle, which is something. Then sort out her laundry, and remove any small stains. Wash the hairbrushes and combs, and lay them in the sun to dry. Tidy the jewellery, and check all the clasps and fasteners. Advise Lady Mary as she selects a suitable outfit, and lay it out in the dressing room for her. Do the same thing for her mid-day outfits and in the evening. If she is going away for a night, you have to pack everything she needs. After dinner, you are usually free, but you may not go to bed until Lady Mary does. You have to be available if she needs anything at all.’

  I was starting to feel sorry I’d volunteered for the job.

  Just then the clock chimed, and Mrs Bailey jumped to her feet.

  ‘Look at the time,’ she said. ‘Lady Mary will be waiting, so run along quickly.’

  ‘Yes, Mrs Bailey. Thank you for telling me all I need to know.’

  ‘My dear girl, that is not one tenth of what
you need to know, but it will have to do for now.’

  Chapter Eleven

  ‘I have already done my hair and laid out my clothes,’ said Lady Mary.

  I turned away so she wouldn’t see me smile. She was acting as if laying out her own clothes was a very big thing. But then, maybe with so many clothes to choose from, it was a big thing. I only owned two dresses and my uniform, and one pair of boots, so I didn’t have to make big decisions five times a day.

  There wasn’t very much for me to do. Lady Mary managed to put on her dress all on her own, and turned so I could do up the tiny pearl buttons on the back. Then I handed her her beautiful cream silk shoes, and tied the button at the ankle.

  ‘Pass me my perfume, please, Lily,’ she said.

  Her dressing table was full of bottles and jars, and I had no idea which one was perfume. I picked the one I thought looked prettiest, a tall glass bottle with for­eign writing on the side. I knew I was right when she took the bottle and dabbed perfume onto her wrists, filling the room with the scent of violets.

  ‘Oh, Lady Mary,’ I said. ‘It’s like being outside in a field of––’ I put my hand over my mouth, remember­ing I wasn’t supposed to talk to her unless she talked to me first.

  She smiled at me. ‘It’s very beautiful, isn’t it? It was a present from the Countess – it came all the way from Czechoslovakia.’

  As she handed me the bottle, I was terrified I’d drop it, and my hand shook as I put it carefully back where I’d found it.

  ‘Which necklace do you think?’ she asked, open­ing one of her many jewellery boxes. ‘The pearls? Or the sapphire? Or maybe the gold locket Sir Josslyn bought me when Michael was born?’

  She held up the locket, and I watched as it swung from its delicate gold chain. I could see the tiny hinge for opening it, and though I dearly wanted to know what was inside, I didn’t dare to ask.

  ‘Would you like to see inside?’ she asked, as if she could read my mind.