All of You

by Jasmine Stevens

  A date might give off the wrong impression—she might read more into it than he’d have intended. Or maybe he was overthinking the whole situation. She knew where he stood on relationships. She’d be perfectly fine going on a date with him, otherwise she would never have agreed to go.

  Never one to worry about his looks and attire, Ben couldn’t believe how flustered he was now getting ready for his hot date. He had tried on three different pairs of jeans and six different shirts. In the end, he had settled for tan-coloured chinos and a buttoned-up navy shirt.

  Now, as he pulled into Emma’s driveway and parked on the grass, his stomach was jumping with nerves. He removed his helmet and ran a hand through his crop of hair, hoping it wasn’t standing on end. The front security light came on as he walked up to the house with his helmet tucked underneath his arm. He didn’t know how his feet weren’t sliding out from underneath him. He was beyond nervous, this feeling was brinking on the verge of anxiety. He stopped dead in his tracks when Emma stepped out onto the front verandah. The sight of her stole his breath. Emma McIntosh was something else. He was looking at the most naturally gorgeous woman he’d ever seen. She wore black tights under a black, long-sleeved skater dress. The sleeves were sheer, and the print on the dress had petite flowers over it bringing out the green of her eyes. Her hair was out, cascading over her shoulders, and the ankle boots she wore on her feet finished the whole outfit off.

  As he reached her, he found his voice. ‘Wow, you look beautiful.’ He kissed her on the cheek.

  ‘You don’t scrub up so bad yourself,’ she said, and he felt her eyes sweep over the length of him making him feel the heat rise from the tips of his toes to the top of his head. He tried to focus his attention on Zoe, who was settled on Emma’s hip. Thank goodness Zoe was coming along tonight. If she weren’t, who knew what would happen. He had visions of backing Emma against the wall of the house and kissing her senseless. He shook this thought from his mind. ‘Hey, possum, how about we get you into the car?’ He was late, and he wondered if Emma had thought he might have chickened out. He took Zoe in his arms as Emma unlocked her car. Concentrating on strapping Zoe into her car seat was a good distraction from the beautiful woman who stood behind him.

  He heard her voice come from behind. ‘It’s a bit chilly. I might duck back inside and grab my coat.’

  That was a great idea, cover up as much of that sexy body as possible, so he wouldn’t be tempted. The dress clung to the curves of her breasts and waist, and he wanted so much to reach out and caress her body. The coat might put a stem on those wanton thoughts.

  Zoe was finally strapped in, and he tested the belt making sure it was secure. When he turned around, Emma was jogging up the front steps. He yelled out, ‘Throw me your keys, and I’ll start the car and get the heater cranking.’

  She turned, and he caught the keys she tossed to him. Ben opened the door and sat in the driver’s seat, turning the keys in the ignition and fiddling with the settings on the heater until he was satisfied with the temperature. He sensed her presence and lifted his head to capture the view of her stepping down the stairs. He groaned. Hell, the white coat she wore came mid-thigh and did little to repel his desire for her. If anything, his attraction for her only intensified.

  She got into the passenger seat after placing Zoe’s nappy bag into the back. She clapped her hands together. ‘All ready to go.’

  Speechless, Ben was unable to string two words together, let alone say one syllable. The car was filled with her heavenly, florally scent, robbing him of any clear thoughts. He put the car in reverse and pulled out of the drive, and as he drove out of the quiet cul-de-sac, he couldn’t keep his hands off her for a moment longer. Reaching over, he placed a hand casually on her thigh, resting it there as he drove. He looked over at her, and she was looking back at him quizzically, and then his heart nearly leapt out of his chest when she covered his hand with her own and squeezed. They sat in silence with her holding his hand the entire trip to the pub, and damn if it wasn’t the shortest trip. Before he was ready for her to let go of him, they were pulling into the pub, and the moment was gone.

  The pub was full of life, which was only to be expected for a Friday night. She saw many familiar faces, and it pleased her that she could now approach many of the locals and have a friendly chat. The scent of chicken schnitzel, steak and chips and gravy wafted out from the kitchen and made Emma’s mouth water and her stomach grumble. She couldn’t wait to sink her teeth into a steak. She hoped Lilly and the rest of the gang weren’t too much longer. They had arranged to meet at six thirty. It was creeping towards seven. She had given Zoe some veggies before they had left, knowing after a big day at daycare, she wouldn’t be long off wanting to go to sleep. She was happily sitting on Emma’s lap holding her doll and talking to it in her own little language no one else understood except for her.

  Emma watched Ben’s progress as he brought a tray of drinks back to the table. She felt like a stalker, but she couldn’t tear her eyes off him. He made her breath hitch with his gorgeous looks, the way he swaggered with confidence, the way his jeans fit oh so perfectly. Damn, she had to stop thinking like this! She was falling head over heels for this man, and here they were trying to play things casual. If he cottoned on to the fact she was falling in love, he’d end their relationship or friendship or whatever the goddamn hell it was. She was totally confused. It was one gigantic mess. One that was going to leave her with a broken heart, she was sure.

  He smiled as he reached the table placing the tray down before lifting out her middy of beer and placing it in front of her on a coaster. He placed a small plastic bottle of apple juice on the tray of Zoe’s highchair. ‘It’s your lucky day, possum. Justine keeps the juice in the fridge for the kiddies.’ He turned to Emma, asking, ‘That’s okay, isn’t it?’ She nodded, and he lifted Zoe off Emma’s lap and placed her into the highchair. She had felt the brush of the back of his hand on her breast as he had lifted Zoe, and the sensation of his hand on her brought a quiver of desire racing through her.

  Emma rested her chin on her palm and watched as Ben popped the lid off the bottle and handed it to Zoe. She sucked as hard as she could before dropping her bottom lip and throwing the bottle back at Ben crying. ‘What did I do wrong? I thought she liked juice?’

  Emma reached over and took the bottle, smiling. ‘She does, when she can drink it.’ She unscrewed the top and lifted a silver piece of foil from the top.

  ‘Ahh. Well, that makes sense now,’ Ben said, taking the juice out of Emma’s hands, screwing the lid back on and handing it back to Zoe. She immediately turned her frown upside down and was all smiles now.

  Ben sat next to Emma and took hold of his beer, indicating she should grab her glass too. She did, and they clinked glasses. ‘Cheers,’ they both said together. She watched him take a drink from his schooner glass over the rim of hers and noted his eyes never moved from her. The electricity between them was sizzling. She wasn’t even sure if she could even form sentences at this point. Despite the coldness of the beer, her mouth remained dry. Did he feel it too? Did he want her as much as she wanted him?

  ‘Hey, you two.’

  Emma twisted around to see Lilly, Niko, and Caleb standing behind her.

  ‘Hey, ‘bout time you guys got here,’ Ben said, clearing his throat.

  ‘Yeah, right.’ Lilly plopped herself into a chair on the other side of Emma. ‘Looks like we interrupted a pretty intense conversation happening here.’ She laughed, and Emma dared not to look at Ben. She could feel the heat burning her cheeks and hoped Ben hadn’t noticed.

  ‘So, when are you two hooking up?’ Lilly asked.

  ‘Lilly!’ all three adults said at once.

  Lilly adjusted Caleb on her lap. ‘Well, it’s so bloody obvious you two are hot for one another.’

  ‘It is, is it?’ Ben asked.

  Emma looked over to him then, and he looked as uncomfortable as she felt. She looked down at the menu and tried her best to chan
ge the subject. ‘I can’t decide what I’m going to eat. There’s so much to choose from.’

  Lilly ribbed her. ‘I get the picture. I’ll stop teasing.’

  Niko rubbed his wife’s shoulder. ‘Forget her. She does this kind of thing all of the time. Ask Lottie and Will.’

  ‘Speak of the devil, here they are.’ Emma watched Lottie and Will walk in hand in hand. She wished one day she could find love like they had. Will and Lottie were destined to be together, and their love shone as bright as an evening star. It hadn’t been easy sailing for the pair in the beginning, but now there was no turning back for them.

  Later, as the group sat around the table, talking and laughing, Emma felt at peace. She felt like she truly belonged in Holbrook now. She had a wonderful bunch of friends and a job she enjoyed. Zoe was settled, and so was she. Holbrook had cleansed and rehabilitated her. She hoped she didn’t have to suddenly leave because of Jason Knight. She’d miss the small town, and she would miss the laidback lifestyle, the friends and, of course, most of all, she’d miss Ben. Jason, however, had been following all the conditions of his parole, and hopefully, he would continue to do so. She was sure, though, there would come a time when he’d want to see his granddaughter, and Emma prayed that wouldn’t happen for a long time.

  Ben leaned over and whispered in her ear. ‘What are you thinking about?’ The sensation of his hot breath tickling her ear sent shock waves of longing through her.

  ‘I thought you knew everything I was thinking? You know, with you being psychic and all.’

  He laughed. ‘You got me.’ The laughter left his eyes replaced by obvious desire. ‘Would you like me to kiss you again?’ His voice was low, so it was only her that could hear what he said.

  ‘I wasn’t thinking that.’ She swallowed hard.

  ‘Shame.’

  ‘Yeah, shame.’ And she really believed that. She’d like nothing more than to feel Ben’s lips on hers. She looked over at Zoe, and away from Ben, not trusting herself not to give away her thoughts. Zoe was sitting on Lottie’s lap playing with her cascade of wavy, blonde hair. The little girl yawned and began to rub her eyes. ‘I was actually thinking, it was time to call it a night. Zoe’s beat.’

  ‘She looks tired, but do you think she can hold out long enough for you to have another drink?’

  ‘I don’t know, Ben.’ She was tempted to stay so she could be close to him. She wasn’t ready to leave, she’d miss his fruity aftershave and the way his hand would brush up against hers every now and then. But most of all, she’d miss the way he was looking at her now—with that intense, steamy look that said, I want to take you back to my place and have hot, passionate sex with you. ‘Okay. One more drink. A lemon-lime and bitters this time, please.’

  He winked at her. ‘Thank you.’

  ‘You’re welcome.’

  Ben stood saying, ‘My shout.’

  Lilly stood, handing Caleb to Niko. ‘Not us, we’re heading home.’

  Niko looked perplexed. ‘We are?’

  Lilly ran a hand down her husband’s arm, seduction rolling off her tongue, ‘Yes, we are, babe.’

  ‘Alrighty, then. See you all later.’ Niko put an arm around Lilly’s shoulder and steered her towards the exit.

  Lottie rolled her shoulders and grimaced. ‘Would you guys mind if we head off, too. I’m exhausted.’

  Lottie mumbled something to Will that Emma missed hearing, but whatever she said had Will taking Zoe off Lottie really quick and handing the little girl back to Emma.

  ‘Alright, party poopers.’ Ben moved over and hugged Lottie. ‘Take care, Goldilocks.’ He slapped his brother on the back. ‘Take care of my favourite sister-in-law and niece.’

  Will looked at his brother, raising his eyebrows. ‘Niece?’

  ‘Yeah, it’s a girl. I’ve got a feeling.’

  Lottie smiled and hugged Emma. ‘You’re going to be disappointed if it’s a boy, then.’

  Will put his arm around his brother’s shoulders and said, ‘You still got a stash of condoms?’

  Ben patted the back pocket of his jeans and looked confused. ‘Yeah, but you obviously have no use for them.’

  ‘No, I don’t, but you might.’ He winked at Emma, and she felt herself blush. ‘Enjoy the rest of your night, you two.’

  As they walked away, Ben looked embarrassed. ‘I’m sorry. Sometimes my brother has no filter. He was paying me back for giving him heaps when he was trying to get together with Lottie.’ He pointed his thumb over his shoulder towards the bar. ‘I’ll get those drinks.’

  Zoe nestled into Emma’s shoulder and closed her eyes. Emma scrounged around in Zoe’s nappy bag for her dummy, and Zoe sucked on it with vigour when Emma placed it into her mouth. She’d be asleep in no time.

  Rocking her back and forth, Emma lifted her head in time to see a beautiful brunette stop Ben on his way to the bar. She couldn’t help the jealousy that sprang to life when she saw the woman run a hand up his arm. That jealousy twisted her stomach in a knot when she saw her then wrap an arm around Ben’s waist and steer him toward the bar. Something he said when he leaned over to talk in her ear must have been funny because the woman threw her head back laughing. Ben placed a hand over the woman’s shoulder, and that was enough for her. She’d seen all she wanted to see. She picked up her bag and her jacket from the back of her chair and walked out of the pub holding a sleeping Zoe, not looking back.

  Emma heard the loud, insistent knocking at her door and groaned. She looked at Zoe, holding her breath as the little girl rolled over onto her belly and spat out her dummy. She waited for the cry to come as the banging on her door woke her, but thankfully it didn’t. Zoe was out for the count. Emma gently closed the nursery door and walked towards the front window. Peering out from behind the curtains, she could see Ben’s figure. He looked far from happy judging from the scowl on his face.

  ‘Stop knocking, Ben. I’m coming.’ She walked on bare feet across the carpet to the front door. As she unlocked the deadbolt and the following locks, she wondered why he was standing at her door and not sidled up with the brunette she’d left him flirting with.

  As she opened the door, he pushed his way in, glaring at her with hands on his hips. ‘What gives?’ His tone, cool, had her questioning whether she had been the one who had done something wrong. Why the hell was he angry at her?

  Emma mirrored his stance, placing her own hands on her hips. ‘What gives?’ Was he kidding, he was the one who barged into her living room looking fit to kill, he should be explaining himself to her. Certainly not the other way around.

  ‘I go to the bar and then come back with the drinks, and you’re gone. Well?’

  ‘I don’t know what you want me to say. Zoe was tired, and you were taking forever, so I left.’

  ‘You left,’ he sputtered. ‘You left me standing around scratching my head, wondering where the hell you’d gone. You scared the hell out of me, taking off like that. What was I supposed to think? So spill, why did you to run off like that?’

  ‘Keep your voice down, Zoe’s asleep.’ Emma looked towards the hallway where Zoe still slept soundlessly.

  He lowered his voice to a whisper and took a step towards her. ‘Tell me the truth. You owe me that much. We were having a great night, and then you were gone. When I spoke to Daisy, she said she saw you leaving, upset. Is it Jason Knight again?’

  ‘No,’ she said with exasperation. ‘It has nothing to do with him.’

  Ben looked up at the ceiling. ‘Thank God. The whole way over here all I thought about was all the bad things that could happen to you and Zoe by that man.’

  Emma suddenly felt ashamed. Leaving the pub had been gut instinct, spur of the moment. She hadn’t thought for one minute how her leaving may have worried Ben into thinking something had happened to Zoe and her. She looked down at her bare feet and circled a loop of carpet with her big toe. ‘You looked pretty cosy flirting with the waitress, I didn’t think you’d miss Zoe and me if we left. Figured we would be
cramping your style.’ She relived the pain of seeing the waitress run her hand up his arm and how it had broken her heart. She was in love with him, and here was another woman caressing his arm and wrapping her arm around his waist. The way he leaned down and whispered something in her ear that made her laugh reminded her of the way she felt when he did that to her. Instantly she wanted to be that waitress, that woman.

  ‘You’re jealous.’ A smile suddenly spread across his face, and she wanted to reach out and wipe it away. Didn’t he realise this was her heart he was messing with? It wasn’t something to be proud of, to wear on his chest like a badge of honour. He was hurting her, and it wasn’t fair.

  ‘I have no right to be jealous. You told me straight up this thing we have going on was never going to go anywhere. You were honest.’

  ‘Why do I feel like this…’ he pointed to himself and then to her, ‘… all of a sudden, it’s my fault? You’re right, I gave you no promises, and you were fine with that. So suddenly, that’s now all changed?’

  ‘Of course, it’s your fault.’ She looked away as he shook his head in obvious disbelief. ‘I don’t understand why you can’t or should I say don’t want to commit to a relationship.’ She ran an exasperated hand through her hair which was tangled from Zoe wrapping her fingers around it. ‘I can’t do this anymore. Seeing you with that woman tonight made me jealous as hell. I want more than friendship, and if I can’t have a relationship with you, then I can’t be your friend anymore. It’s too hard.’