Before She Was Found

by Heather Gudenkauf

  “It’s probably the same idiots who spray-painted the house,” I tell him, my stomach churning. “Try not to worry about it.”

  Max lets out a long breath. “Except for Nikki, I hate it here.”

  “Me, too,” I say. “But we have each other and that’s going to have to be enough for now.”

  We go inside. I lock the front door and then go around to each window making sure they are secured, too. I say good-night to Max and then go upstairs to peek in on Violet. She is sleeping soundly. I sit on the edge of her bed for a long time watching her chest rise and fall.

  Case #92-10945

  Excerpt from the journal of Cora E. Landry

  Nov. 22, 2017

  I know that JW44 isn’t really Joseph Wither. It’s probably some random person who saw my post on DarkestDoor and thought it would be funny to pretend to be Wither. Ha ha. I don’t plan on talking to him anymore. I mean, I did pay attention during Digital Literacy class. I’ve seen the news. I’ve heard all about stranger danger since I was in kindergarten.

  And the way he asked me if I ever kissed anyone before. That is just strange. Sometimes I think about what it would be like to kiss someone. It used to be Gabe I’d think about, but now it’s Joseph. For some reason I feel guilty if I imagine myself kissing Gabe—like Joseph could look into my head and see what I’m thinking. I wonder if Joseph thinks about kissing me, too.

  I asked my sister if she ever had a green river to drink and she asked me what it was. It was kind of cool knowing something that she didn’t. Before I could tell her what was in it my mom came into the room and said, 7Up and lime syrup! She said she hadn’t thought of green rivers in ages, that she used to drink them all the time when she was a kid. Sounds gross, Kendall said.

  Since it was an early out today from school because of Thanksgiving, I asked Jordyn and Violet if they wanted to walk to Susie Q’s after school and they said yes. We sat in a booth in the back of the restaurant and looked at the menu. I didn’t see a green river listed but I asked the waitress if I could have one. I expected her to say no, but she said, Sure thing, sweetie. You want a wedge of lime with that? I said yes, feeling kind of grown-up.

  Jordyn ordered a turtle sundae and Violet just ordered a small hot chocolate, which was the cheapest thing on the menu. I added a large order of fries to mine and acted all surprised that the waitress brought out such a huge basket. Violet gave me a little smile like she knew what I was doing. I pretended I didn’t see.

  While we were eating, I asked Violet and Jordyn if they ever wondered if Joseph Wither could be real. Violet said no way. It was just a story that people told to scare each other but Jordyn thought maybe he could be real. Not real real, she said. More like a ghost.

  Jordyn’s answer surprised me. I thought for sure she would laugh and say that anyone who believed that Wither is real is stupid. Then we got talking about ghost stories and scary movies and laughed and laughed. It was fun. Before I knew it, Kendall stomped into the restaurant and said that Mom was waiting in the car outside to pick me up.

  Things are going really well with Violet and Jordyn. I forgot what it felt like to have best friends and it feels so good. The other day at school Melody Jenkins started walking really close behind me in the hallway. My shoe was untied and she kept trying to step on my shoelace so I would trip. I tried to ignore her and just walk faster but she stayed right behind. Then Jordyn came around the corner and saw what was happening. She rushed over and told Melody to stop it. Melody said something snotty and Jordyn told her to eff off. Melody opened and closed her mouth like a fish but didn’t say anything and just stomped off.

  No one has ever stood up for me like that. Ever. Not even Ellie before she moved away. I actually like going to school now.

  The only bad thing is the whole Gabe thing is still weird between Jordyn and me. Jordyn always makes a point to show me any texts he sends her. The texts are really no big deal. Just about assignments and Jordyn is always the one who texts him first.

  Gabe and I still text using Violet’s phone. She even lent me her phone overnight so Gabe and I could text. Gabe and I also talk in person and that’s so much better than texting. Every morning Gabe and I walk into school together and he waits until I put my things into my locker. We don’t talk about anything special but it’s nice.

  The green river was okay. It just tasted like 7Up but sour. I thought about going home and emailing JW44 and telling him that Susie Q’s still serves green rivers but then I remembered that I probably shouldn’t. What I should do is tell someone about him. A trusted adult. Not my mom or dad. They would freak out. Maybe Mr. Dover. But I know I won’t tell anyone about Joseph. He’s my secret.

  The night that Violet let me borrow her phone, I used it to go to the DarkestDoor website to send Joseph a message. I told him I was using my friend’s phone and then Joseph said something that freaked me out a bit. He told me to take a picture of myself and send it to him. I got scared and told him I had to go. I didn’t talk to him for a few days.

  But even when we aren’t sending messages back and forth, I’m thinking about Joseph. After I go to bed I make up conversations in my head. He always says the right things. He’s always there when I need him. I can almost feel him lying there next to me.

  Case #92-10945

  Direct message dated December 1, 2017,

  via DarkestDoor.com

  Corareef12:

  Hey, I tried a green river. It was good!

  JW44:

  I TOLD YOU SO. DID YOU SHARE IT WITH SOMEONE SPECIAL?

  Corareef12:

  Just Jordyn and Violet.

  JW44:

  WE’LL HAVE TO HAVE ONE TOGETHER SOME TIME.

  Corareef12:

  Yeah, right.

  JW44:

  WHAT DO YOU MEAN? YOU DON’T THINK WE’LL EVER MEET IN PERSON?

  Corareef12:

  I think that once I’m done with the school project you’ll probably just forget about me.

  JW44:

  NO WAY. I’D NEVER LET THAT HAPPEN. HOW IS YOUR PROJECT GOING? I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING THAT YOU MIGHT WANT TO INCLUDE IN YOUR PRESENTATION. SOMETHING THAT NO ONE ELSE KNOWS ABOUT. ARE YOU INTERESTED?

  Corareef12:

  Okay, tell me.

  JW44:

  WHAT WILL YOU DO FOR ME?

  Corareef12:

  What do you mean?

  JW44:

  IF I TELL YOU MY SECRET YOU HAVE TO TELL ME ONE OF YOURS.

  Corareef12:

  I don’t have any secrets.

  JW44:

  COME ON, EVERYONE HAS SECRETS. I’LL TELL YOU MINE IF YOU TELL ME YOURS.

  Corareef12:

  I don’t know. I guess you’re my secret. No one knows I talk to you.

  JW44:

  THAT’S NOT A SECRET. I ALREADY KNOW THAT. SOMETHING ELSE, THEN. GO TO THE WINDOW.

  Corareef12:

  What?

  JW44:

  GO TO THE WINDOW AND STAND THERE. I WANT TO SEE YOU.

  Corareef12:

  How can you see me? Are you outside right now?

  JW44:

  JUST GO AND STAND IN THE WINDOW FOR A MINUTE AND THEN COME BACK.

  Corareef12:

  Okay. I’m going now.

  Corareef12:

  All right. That was weird but I did it. I didn’t see you, though.

  JW44:

  I SAW YOU. YOU’RE WEARING A GRAY SHIRT AND HAVE YOUR HAIR IN A PONYTAIL.

  JW44:

  YOU STILL THERE?

  Corareef12:

  Are you outside?

  JW44:

  I’M ALWAYS AROUND. OKAY. NOW I’LL TELL YOU MY SECRET. PEOPLE DON’T KNOW THIS BUT THERE WAS ANOTHER GIRL, A LONG TIME AGO. HER NAME IS RACHEL. EVERYONE THOUGHT SHE RAN AWAY. BUT SHE DIDN’T—SHE CAME WITH ME
.

  JW44:

  ARE YOU STILL THERE?

  Corareef12:

  Is she dead?

  JW44:

  NO. THAT’S ALL JUST RUMORS. I DON’T NEED TO KILL PEOPLE. THEY WANT TO COME WITH ME. RACHEL WANTED TO COME WITH ME. ALL THE GIRLS DID.

  Corareef12:

  But what about the girls who died? Everyone says you killed them.

  JW44:

  LIES. THE GIRLS WANTED TO COME WITH ME. THE ONES THAT DIED WEREN’T BRAVE ENOUGH. I CAN’T TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR THAT.

  Corareef12:

  I don’t think I can include this in the report. I don’t have any proof. My teacher says we have to have reliable sources.

  JW44:

  YOU DON’T THINK I’M RELIABLE?

  Corareef12:

  I need proof. Like from a book or newspaper.

  JW44:

  GO TO THE LIBRARY AND LOOK THROUGH THE YEARBOOKS FROM 1991. YOU’LL FIND IT THERE.

  Corareef12:

  What will I find?

  JW44:

  THE PROOF. THEN WE CAN MEET EACH OTHER IN REAL LIFE. THEN YOU’LL KNOW I’M WHO I SAY I AM.

  Dr. Madeline Gideon

  September 14, 2018

  I remember being taken aback by Cora’s statement—I didn’t die. “Yes, Cora,” I said. “You are alive and a whole lot of people are so happy about that.” Cora tried to say something more but it morphed into a grimace of pain. I patted her uncasted arm and told her that I would stop by later in the afternoon to see how she was doing. Cora nodded, then closed her uncovered eye and floated off to sleep. I told Kendall goodbye and beckoned Mara to join me in the hallway.

  Around us the hallway buzzed with activity. Nurses and doctors moved purposely down the corridor while patient visitors moved slowly as if in a stupor of fatigue and worry. “I’ll plan on dropping in a few times each day while she’s here. It will give us a chance to get to know each other and hopefully help Cora to feel more comfortable talking to me. Have her doctors told you how long they plan on keeping her?” I asked.

  “Until Thursday or Friday, they think,” she answered, rubbing the back of her neck with one hand. It was nice that families could stay right in the hospital room with their children but the sleeping accommodations weren’t known for being comfortable. “With her head injury they want to watch her for a few more days and they want to make sure her sutures are healing well and no infections crop up,” Mara said.

  “I’m glad to hear they are keeping a close eye on her. I’m happy to see that Kendall is here, too. You mentioned last night that she was hesitant to come see Cora.”

  “I’m not sure what changed,” Mara said, “but I’m glad she came. Cora thinks the world of Kendall and Kendall doesn’t always have a whole lot of time for her.”

  “I think that’s pretty typical of siblings,” I reassured her.

  “Oh, there’s Jim,” Mara said, looking past me. I turned and Mr. Landry, dressed in khakis and a button-down shirt, hurried toward us carrying two Styrofoam cups of coffee. He nodded at me by way of greeting and handed one of the cups to Mara. “I just got off the phone with the chief. You know who their main suspect is?” he asked incredulously.

  “Who?” Mara clutched at his sleeve, causing his own cup to tip, and coffee spilled to the ground. “Did they arrest someone?”

  My curiosity was piqued. I hadn’t gotten any details about the crime beyond what Mara had told me and that ridiculous news story from the night before. I pulled a Kleenex from my bag and crouched down to wipe up the spill. I purposely didn’t bring up the news report with Mara, not wanting to upset her needlessly.

  “Joseph Wither.” He laughed. An angry bark that held no humor.

  “Seriously?” Mara asked, pressing her fingers to her lips. “They said that?”

  “Not really, no,” Jim said. “The officer said that the Crow girl said it was Joseph Wither coming back from the dead and that he stabbed Cora with some kind of knife.”

  “What would make her say that?” Mara asked. “It must be a mistake.”

  “Of course it’s a mistake,” Jim snapped and I pulled Cora’s door shut in hopes that she couldn’t hear our conversation. “The police officer said that it’s most likely the Crow girl was just scared and confused.”

  I thought of the newscast from the night before. “Joseph Wither?” I asked, inviting further explanation. Thinking that maybe the news reporter did get it right.

  “A ghost,” Jim said, throwing his arms out in frustration. I wanted to grab the cup of coffee before he spilled it all over his wife, or me for that matter. “A phantom. He’s not real. Just some stupid character the kids talk about. She may as well have said it was the Easter Bunny or a leprechaun for what it’s worth. At this rate the police aren’t going to catch anyone.”

  “What does Cora say?” I questioned. “Has she talked about the attack at all?”

  “No, she hasn’t said anything beyond crying out in her sleep.” Mara shook her head. “The police wanted to question her yesterday but she was so out of it after the surgery they decided to wait until today. Someone is supposed to come later this morning to talk to her.”

  Cora’s door opened and Kendall poked her head out. “What’s going on?” she asked in a whisper. “You’re being really loud.” She was a striking young woman. Tall and lithe with the stature of a ballerina.

  “Did we wake Cora?” Mara fretted. “It’s nothing.”

  “It is something, goddammit.” Jim brushed roughly past Mara, sending a wave of coffee across the front of her T-shirt.

  “Ouch!” Mara jumped backward and pulled her wet shirt away from her skin. “Jim,” she hissed, “let her rest. Don’t bother her.” But Jim had already swept past Kendall and into Cora’s room with the rest of us trailing after him.

  “Cora,” he said, trying to keep his voice low and composed but instead it came out as brusque and exasperated, causing Cora to startle awake. “Cora, the police need to know who hurt you. Can you tell us what you saw?”

  “Mom?” Cora called out uncertainly.

  “Stop it, Jim, you’re scaring her! She’s not ready to talk. Leave her alone!”

  “Mr. Landry,” I said, keeping my voice even but authoritative. “The more upset Cora is, the more difficult she may find it to remember the important details of the event.”

  “Event?” Jim swung around toward me, causing me to take a step backward. “Event? This wasn’t an event. Someone targeted our twelve-year-old daughter, beat her and stabbed her with a knife. That is not an event, it’s attempted murder!” His breath came out in ragged puffs.

  “I understand,” I said, trying to lead him from Cora’s bedside. “It’s very upsetting.”

  He didn’t move but continued to speak to Cora. “This is very important, Cora.” He leaned down so that his lips were near her face. “Violet told the police that Joseph Wither hurt you. Why would she say that? Was someone down at the tracks pretending to be him? Can you remember what he looked like?”

  “I don’t remember,” Cora whimpered. This was not helping. Cora was clearly distraught and forcing her to try to remember what happened could make her shut down, making it more difficult for her to recall important details of the crime.

  “Dad, stop it,” Kendall cried before I could step in to try to redirect the conversation. She pulled at his arm but he shook her off.

  “But you must have seen something,” Jim insisted. “You had to be facing him when he stabbed you. Try to think.”

  “Jim, please,” Mara whispered.

  “Mr. Landry,” I said firmly and pressed the call button for the nurse. “Look at Cora. You’re scaring her. Going about it this way won’t give you the answers you want. Let’s step outside and talk about it.”

  My words seemed to bring him to his senses. He stared down at his daught
er, who was crying silently. “Shh, Cora,” he said. “I’m sorry, honey. I didn’t mean to upset you.” He cradled her bandaged head in his hands. “I’m sorry. I just want to get the person who did this to you and I know it wasn’t some stupid legend. It was a real person and I don’t want him to hurt anyone else.” He kissed her cheek and this seemed to soothe her.

  A nurse stepped into the room and I watched him leave, knowing that he was overwhelmed and felt helpless. Still, I didn’t like Jim Landry much. Something about him rubbed me the wrong way. I moved away from Cora’s bed so the nurse could take her temperature and examine her bandages. “What’s your pain level?” the nurse asked. “Zero being no pain and ten being the worst.”

  “A nine,” Cora said, her chin trembling. “Everything hurts.”

  When the nurse left to get something to ease Cora’s pain, Mara dropped into a nearby chair. “The girls did a school project on Joseph Wither,” she said weakly. “Last November. For Mr. Dover’s class.”

  “I’m sorry, I didn’t grow up around here so I don’t really know who Joseph Wither is. Was,” I said. “A character of some sort?”

  “An urban legend,” Kendall said. “Mr. Dover assigned the same project to us when I was in sixth grade. We had to research an urban legend and present it to the class. Cora and her friends made a movie.”

  “On this Joseph Wither person?” I asked and Mara nodded. “So lots of people could have known that the girls worked on this project?”

  “I guess.” Mara shrugged. “Mr. Dover and Cora’s classmates would have known for sure.” Mara rubbed her arms as if trying to warm herself. “Do you think someone might have pretended to be Joseph Wither and lured the girls to the train yard and attacked them there?”

  “Oh, my God, that’s horrible,” Kendall said, chewing on her thumbnail.

  “Or perhaps, because of the project they worked on, the Crow girl’s thoughts immediately went to Joseph Wither,” I suggested. “It sounds like the police are looking into all the possibilities. The important thing to remember is that Cora is safe now. No one can hurt her here.”