Bad Habits (Nashville Outlaws #1)

by Cheryl Douglas

  “I can’t believe you did this,” she said, wide-eyed, as she looked around. “I haven’t been back here in years.”

  It wasn’t a working farm anymore. The farmer who’d bought the property had two sons. One had died in a work related accident five years ago and the other was in the military. His wife had Alzheimer’s and had to live in a full-time care facility in town. I’d come out here to talk to him a couple of days ago, when I told Cece I had some business to take care of.

  The old farmer and I talked for hours, over sweet tea on the front porch. He told me about his family. I told him about mine. He asked some questions about the music business, after he asked what I did for a living. It was a good talk. He was a nice man, someone I knew Cece would have liked.

  She pointed to the old barn. “That’s where granddaddy used to keep the chickens,” she said, pointing to an old coup. “And the goats were right there.” She smiled. “We had a favorite cow, my cousins and sister and I. We named her Maisy, and we’d feed her before the other cows got theirs.”

  I smiled, squeezing her thigh. “Did you ride horses too?” I raised an eyebrow, thinking how hot my girl would look riding bareback. We had room for horses on my acreage in Nashville, and I just might have to add a few if it meant I’d get to see that on the daily.

  “Sure did,” she said, laying her hand over mine. “I took lessons from the time I was four. I loved it. Granddaddy kept a few here so we could ride.”

  “You spent a lot of time here during the summers?” I cut the engine of my rental car and turned to face her.

  “As much as possible.” She wrinkled her nose. “I felt so cooped up in town. I loved the wide open spaces and fresh air out here.” She pointed to an old oak tree. “That was my favorite place for playing my guitar and writing songs. ‘Course the song writing didn’t start ‘til the summer I turned eleven, if memory serves.”

  I leaned in to kiss her, needing to taste those sweet lips. Curling my hand around her face, I whispered, “That looks like the perfect place for a picnic. Come on.”

  She giggled as she climbed out of the car, spreading her arms wide and tipping her head back to admire the clear blue sky. “This is exactly what I needed today. How’d you know?”

  I met her around the side of the car after snagging the picnic basket from the trunk. “Because I know you, Cece.”

  I was looking into her eyes, thinking how easy it was to read her. I knew her heart. Her mind. Her fears. Her dreams. I’d invested years getting to know this woman, and it was the best investment I’d ever made. Knowing someone as well as I knew myself was a blessing and a curse, because when she was in pain and experiencing fear, like she had been during Chee’s ordeal, I felt it as acutely as my own.

  I linked my hand with hers and led her to the tree she’d pointed out earlier. I spread the blanket on the ground as she looked up the hill.

  “It feels weird being here,” she said, looking up at the old red brick farmhouse with wraparound porch. “Are you sure this is okay?”

  “I promise.” I tugged on her hand. “Now sit. You need to eat.” She’d been grabbing snacks here and there, drinking only when I forced water or coffee into her hands, but I suspected she hadn’t enjoyed a real meal since she got that call about Chee.

  I spread out the food. Fresh bread, crackers, spreads, thinly sliced meat, cheeses, fruit, and wine. She clapped her hands when she spotted the gourmet chocolate… because my girl had a serious sweet tooth.

  “You are the best!” she said, throwing her arms around my neck as she rained kisses down on my cheeks. “I love you so much!”

  “That’s all I had to do?” I grinned. “Buy you chocolates?”

  Girls I’d dated in the past, even casually, expected diamonds, designer clothes, and cars. But Cece? Chocolate truffles, that’s all it took to make her light up. That’s why I loved her. She was a simple girl who knew material things couldn’t buy happiness. Happiness came from moments like this, hanging out with someone you loved, talking, daydreaming, sharing some good food and a nice glass of wine.

  “That’s all you ever have to do,” she said, grinning as she watched me open her favorite bottle of chardonnay. Cece enjoyed a cold beer as much as I did, but I thought the occasion warranted wine. Champagne would have been even better, but I didn’t want to show my hand too soon.

  “What shall we drink to?” she asked, holding her glass by the stem, as she waited for me to raise my glass.

  “To more moments like this.” As long as we took time to connect like this, I knew no matter how crazy life on the road got, we’d always feel grounded. “Just falling deeper in love, baby.”

  “I love that.” She touched her glass to mine before taking a sip. “Hmm, haven’t had this in a while.” She swallowed, looking like she wanted to ask me something, but was afraid.

  “What’s going on in there, beautiful?” I tapped my fingertip against her temple before popping a cube of cheese into her mouth. “And don’t tell me nothing. You know I know you too well. You can’t lie to me.”

  “Um, after I left, did things get a little crazy, on the tour?”

  I frowned as I spread a cracker with brie and handed one to her before claiming one for myself. “What do you mean? Did you hear something?”

  “No.” She shook her head. “I talked to Chris and Gina and they said it was business as usual, but I wasn’t sure if that meant…”

  I tipped my head, trying to understand her hesitancy, as I passed her a stem of grapes. “What, baby? You wanna ask me something, just ask.”

  “So, um, life on the road with you has always been… interesting, to say the least. You and your band like to have fun.” She raised her hand. “And there’s nothing wrong with that, honestly.”

  I thought I could guess where she was going with this, but I needed to hear her say it. “But?”

  “The booze, the drugs, the women…” She shook her head. “Not that I’m worried about you being with other women. I’m not. But it’s a lifestyle. The temptation will always be around, and if I’m not, around, that is—”

  “You’re worried drugs or alcohol might lower my inhibitions.” I’d feel the same way in her position. I sure as hell wouldn’t want her on the road with our crew, partying like a rock star, while I sat at home, having to guess what was going on.

  “Something like that.” She popped another square of cheese in her mouth. “I know I have to trust you, and it’s not like I think you have a problem with substance abuse. You could probably take it or leave it, but…”

  I liked to drink, smoke a little weed with my boys. I’d experimented with cocaine, but the heavier shit scared me. I knew I could get addicted and de-rail my life with that stuff. So I kept it light and practiced moderation, same as most artists in my business.

  “You’d rather I leave it?” I wanted to be a man my kids would be proud of and if that meant setting a good example, I’d leave the booze and drugs behind. “Yeah?”

  She bit her lip. “Um, it’s not that I never expect you to have a drink again, Knox. I know you’re not an alcoholic or anything. But being on the road without me might...” She shrugged. “I don’t know. Tempt you to get lost in that shit again, and I don’t want to lose you. To anything or anyone.”

  Chee told me to tell her about their plans when I thought the time was right, and it felt right now. “So listen,” I took her hands. “I know you love your family and you’re determined to be there for your parents, but they don’t want you to sacrifice your happiness for them, Ce.”

  “I’m not gonna let my sister—”

  I shut her up with a kiss. My favorite way to silence her. “Just hear me out, babe. The reason Chee wanted me to come out here was because he’d been doing some thinking, makin’ some plans and he needed someone to help execute those plans. I guess I was his guy.”

  “I don’t follow,” she said, shaking her head. “He’s never said anything to me about—”

  “He heard you and your siste
r wanted to move back here. He’s not havin’ it, babe.” I smiled. “You know Chee, when he’s got his mind made up about something…”

  She sighed. “There’s no changing it. I know. But we can’t leave Mama alone to deal with this on her own. It’s not fair. Besides, neither one of them are getting any younger.”

  “I know.” I grabbed her hand, kissing her fingertips. “And they know that too. But they don’t think it’s fair for you and Charli to give up your lives when it would be a lot easier for them to move to Nashville.”

  Her eyes widened before she whispered, “Nashville? Seriously?”

  Sitting on the secret had been hell, but watching her eyes come alive with excitement made it all worth it. “Yeah. If Charli takes that job with Dade, which we all know she wants to, she’ll be in Nashville. It makes more sense for them to move out there than for either of you to move back here.”

  “I guess it does, but are you sure this is what they want? I don’t want them to feel pressured to do something they don’t want to do.”

  I laughed. “Uh, have you met your parents, Ce? You really think anyone could convince them to do anything they don’t want to do?”

  Her lips twitched before she conceded. “No, I guess not.” Her hands framed my face before she whispered, “You know what this means, don’t you? I’ll still be able to go out on the road with you.”

  “That’s kind of the point,” I said, stealing another kiss.

  “But if Charli’s on the road with Dade the same time we’re—”

  “Don’t worry about the logistics, okay? We’ll work that out.” I brushed her hair aside so I could kiss her neck. “Point is, this is a solution that’ll make everyone happy.”

  “You’re right.” She sighed contentedly as she leaned into me. “This is perfect. Thank you.”

  “My pleasure. I’m just glad Chee trusted me enough to get me involved. In fact…” I lifted my phone out of my pocket and pulled up the pics of the house they wanted. “We’ve already got the ball rolling on this.” I let her scroll through the pics before I said, “You know the house Rosanna was getting ready to sell, her parents’ house?” I pointed to the screen. “That’s it. Thought it would be perfect for your folks.”

  “It would,” she said, nodding. “I think they’ll love it. And it’s close to my apartment too.”

  More importantly, it was close to my house, which I hoped would soon be her home. “Chee was pretty clear about what he wanted. He said as long as there was a spot for his recliner, a garage and workshop, and a couple of extra bedrooms for his biker buddies to visit, he’d be happy.”

  She laughed. “That sounds like him.”

  “He also mentioned those guest rooms could serve double duty when we gave him grandchildren.”

  She palmed her forehead as the color rose in her cheeks. “He didn’t really say that, did he?” When I grinned, she said, “Of course he did. This is my father, we’re talking about. He has no filter.” She pointed at me. “I warned you this would happen, didn’t I? As soon as they got a whiff of us being a couple they’d be relentless.”

  “Hey,” I said, stroking her cheek. “I really don’t mind. In fact, I kinda like it.”

  She tipped her head back, letting the sun warm her face. “You like it? You must be a sucker for punishment then.”

  “I’m a sucker for you, beautiful.” I nuzzled her neck. “Every little thing about you turns me inside out.” My lips trailed over her jaw, making her shiver, before I said, “Your daddy gave me his blessing. Can’t tell you how much that meant to me, knowing he thinks I’m man enough to make you happy for the rest of your life.”

  Her gaze darted to mine, before she whispered, “You seriously asked for his blessing?”

  “Of course.” I wouldn’t tell her it was because I was afraid I wouldn’t get the chance if I waited until after his surgery. “Chee’s heart attack made me realize something. You think you have all this time, you never expect your number to get called, but you never know when it might. So when you know something’s right, why waste time?”

  “True.”

  I reached into the pocket of my black denim jacket and pulled out a box. There were no words to tell this woman how much she meant to me, but since I was supposed to be an award-winning wordsmith, I knew I had to give it a shot.

  “Ohmigod…” Cece whispered, her hand covering her mouth.

  “So here’s the deal,” I said, clearing the emotion from my throat as I popped the box open to reveal a two and a half carat round solitaire. “Just about five years ago you blew into my life, this sexy little hurricane. Stirred everything up.” I chuckled. “Hell, I didn’t know which way was up for the longest time.” She laid her head on my shoulder, sniffling. “You made me laugh my ass off. Mostly at myself. You wouldn’t let me take anything too seriously. The money, the awards, you reminded me it didn’t mean shit if I wasn’t making music I was proud of.” I tipped her chin, dropping a kiss on her lips. “I have you to thank for my career, Cece. You’re the one who’s kept me grounded all this time.”

  She snuggled deeper into my arms and we finally fell into a clearing on the blanket. I wasn’t on bended knee, but I didn’t think my girl cared about tradition. We hadn’t fallen in love in the usual way, so why should my proposal be rehearsed?

  Her hand slid into my jacket, resting on my chest, as she waited for me to continue.

  “Look at me.” I waited until she tipped her head back before I said, “I never expected to fall in love with my best friend, but it makes perfect sense to me now. How could I not fall in love with you? You just… fit me.”

  “I love you,” she mouthed, her eyes shining.

  “Baby, I never thought about forever with anyone, until I thought about losing you. That’s when it hit me. I wanted you in my life… forever. As my best friend. But more than that, I wanted you to be my lover. My wife. The mama of our beautiful babies. I want you to be my partner on the road… and in this life.”

  She half-giggled, half-sobbed, as she fisted my t-shirt.

  “So…” I slipped the ring out of the box before propping my weight up on an elbow, my head in my head. I was looking down at her. The most beautiful woman in the world. My future. “Will you do me the honour of being mine… forever?”

  “Yes.” She brought my face down to meet hers, as she stifled my laughter with her excited kisses.

  “Then let’s make it official.” I slid the ring on her finger and she held it up, letting the sun catch it and cast a blinding rainbow. “Damn, that looks good on your finger.”

  “I never want to take it off,” she whispered, wrapping her arms around me.

  “See that you don’t.” I brushed her wild hair off her face before my eyes locked with hers. I was kissing my fiancé for the very first time. Damn. That knowledge made my heart beat just a little faster as my tongue tangled with hers.

  She moaned into my mouth and started pushing my jacket over my shoulders. I knew if I didn’t give her the second part of my surprise now, it would have to wait until much later, so I tore my lips from hers and whispered, “Grab that piece of paper out of my pocket, angel. I’ve got a little engagement gift for you. For your whole family actually.”

  She snagged the paper and opened it, gasping when she read the first few lines. She pushed me out of the way in her haste to sit up. “Knox, you didn’t!”

  “I did.”

  “No.” She shook her head as her eyes drifted up to the house. “You bought the house, this land back, for us? For my family?”

  I’d put all of their names on the deed, because I knew that’s how it always should have been. This house, this land, was a part of their history. And when I explained that to the old farmer, Mr. Joseph, he’d been happy to sell it to me. He told me he’d had plenty of offers from developers over the years, but didn’t want to see an ‘ugly’ condo building or row houses where wild open fields belonged.

  “I can’t believe you did this.” She closed her eyes a
s the tears continued to flow. “You are the best.” She sniffled. “Funny, I said those very same words to my daddy right before his surgery. I meant them then and I mean them now.” She reached for my hand. “I never thought I’d meet someone who’d love me the way you love me. Who’d do this…” She swept her arm out. “Just to make me happy.”

  “I’d do anything to make you happy, angel. Don’t you know that by now?”

  “I can’t.” She sniffled as she clutched the paper in her hand and pressed it to her chest. “There are no words…”

  “We don’t need words, sweetheart.” The look in her eyes said it all. I’d righted an old wrong, because I could, and that was the only thing that mattered to me. “I just need you to smile like that for me, every day, for the next forty or fifty years, that’s all.”

  “Done.” She pushed me back, straddling me. “I’m not gonna ask if you’ve ever done it outside, because I don’t think I wanna know if you have. Let’s just pretend it’s the first time.”

  I chuckled as my hands bracketed her waist. “Uh before we get to that, I have one more question?”

  She quirked an eyebrow as she planted her hands on my chest. “Oh yeah? What’s that?”

  “You like those rustic outdoor wedding that are so trendy right now?” I glanced down the hill. “Maybe even a barn wedding? If so, I happen to know the perfect spot.”

  She shrieked, slapping my chest. “Ohmigod, that’s perfect! We could have the wedding right here!”

  I laughed as I tightened my arms around her, pulling her down on top of me. “Just like always beautiful, we’re on the same page.”

  Epilogue

  Cece

  Being in my grandparents’ old bedroom as I prepared for my walk down the aisle, made me feel closer to them, like they were right there with us, watching me marry the man of my dreams. It had been six months since Knox slipped that ring on my finger, and he’d been outdoing himself to make all my dreams come true ever since.