Home Is Where You Are

by Melissa Grace

  “Exactly. That means I’ve had twenty-nine years of experience celebrating birthdays, and I don’t mean to brag, but I’m kind of an expert now.” He laughed nervously while I stood there unable to form actual words. Finally, he asked the necessary question. “How old are you?”

  “Not twenty-nine,” I fired back.

  “I gathered that.” I narrowed my eyes at him. “Not because I think you don’t look it, but because you keep saying the word ‘twenty-nine’ like it’s poisonous or something.”

  “I’ll be thirty-seven,” I said finally.

  “Okay.” He shrugged.

  “When I was thirty, you were twenty-two.”

  “Believe it or not, I can do basic math.” He held up his hands and wiggled them. “Without even using my fingers.”

  “When I was twenty, you were twelve.”

  “Way to make it weird,” he teased.

  I stared back at him blankly. “I think it’s time for me to go home.” I started to brush past him, but he grabbed me gently by my arm.

  “Whoa, wait a minute,” he pleaded. “I was messing with you. There’s nothing about this that’s weird.”

  “Jax, I’m eight years older than you.” I wasn’t sure what part of that he wasn’t getting.

  “Yeah, and I don’t care.” Jax’s hand slid down my arm until he held my hand. He looked at my delicate hand in his strong one for a moment before focusing his intense eyes back on me. “I like you, Liv. I don’t give a fuck about your age.”

  “You may not think so now, but—”

  “But nothing,” he said emphatically. Visions of Jessica Rabbit the supermodel danced in my head. You never think it matters until it does. He looked at me earnestly as if I’d spoken my thoughts out loud. My gaze fell to my feet, but he hooked his finger beneath my chin, bringing my eyes back to his. “I don’t pretend to know everything you went through with your ex, but I can tell you one damn thing for sure. I’m not him.”

  I don’t know if it was the way his spicy, woodsy scent mixed with the crisp autumn air, the sugar rush from the donuts, or if it was the way he looked at me like I was something special, but something inside me wanted to believe him.

  “I know this sounds crazy, but I’ve felt a connection between us ever since I saw you standing outside that dressing room, and I think you feel it too.” He took a step closer to me, my hand still enclosed in his. “So, I’m going to ask you again. Will you let me know you?’

  “I don’t know, Jax.” I shook my head.

  “Please.” His mouth stretched into an adorable grin. “I promise I’ll grow on you.”

  “Like a fungus?” I asked, my lips curling into a smile against my will.

  “Exactly like that,” he murmured, reaching for my other hand. I relished in the feeling of his calloused fingers against my skin.

  “Okay,” I agreed. I withdrew my hands from his, and a flash of disappointment flickered across his face. “Friends. We can be friends.”

  He raised an eyebrow at me. “Uh-huh.”

  “Friends,” I insisted.

  “You drive a hard bargain, Olivia Sinclair.” He nodded slowly, pressing his lips together. “Alright. Fine. Whatever I have to agree to for you not to shut us down.”

  “There is no us,” I reminded him, tilting my head in warning.

  “Not yet.” He grinned at me playfully. “How can you be so sure you won’t find me irresistible?” That was exactly the problem. I already found him irresistible, but I just couldn’t let myself go there.

  “It really is getting late,” I said. “I’ve got to work in a few short hours.” He gazed at me intently as though he could figure me out and unravel me with his eyes. I averted my gaze, afraid that if he looked at me like that long enough, he probably could.

  “Alright.” He nodded. “Let’s get you home. To the Batmobile!”

  We walked back to the car in comfortable silence, close enough that our arms touched every few steps. I caught Jax gazing over at me a few times, his hand at his side and his fingers so close to my own that I could have easily taken his hand in mine. I dug my own hands deep in my pockets to keep from doing exactly that. When we reached the car, he hit the fob and opened the door, tucking me safely inside before jogging around to the driver’s side.

  Our conversation on the short drive to my house was light, though the way he kept looking over at me was anything but. I helped him navigate the backroads leading from Berry Hill to 12 South. A few moments later, he pulled the Batmobile to a stop in front of my house.

  “Thank you for coming out with me tonight,” he said softly. “I had a good time.”

  “Me too.” I smiled over at him. “Thanks for the donuts.”

  “Donut mention it.” He laughed and waggled his eyebrows, clearly proud of himself.

  I shook my head and giggled, reaching for the door.

  “Wait.” Before I could protest, he hopped out and met me on the other side, helping me out of the car. “Let me walk you to your door.”

  “Absolutely not,” I said adamantly.

  “And why not?”

  “Because that’s too date-y.”

  “Is that a real word?”

  “It is now,” I answered.

  “Because, to be clear, this wasn’t a date?” His tone was joking, but his face told me he believed this was a date.

  “Correct,” I replied.

  “Right. I guess I’m going to have to watch you walk to your door like a creeper.”

  “Or you could get back in your car and drive away.”

  “I can’t do that. What if an actual creeper comes along and you need me to save you?”

  “Fine.” I rolled my eyes and chuckled. “Good night, Jax.”

  His eyes settled on me. All traces of laughter left his face, and in their place was a look that could only be described as tender. “Good night, Liv.”

  I fished for my keys and phone as I started up the stone walkway. By the time I reached the door and had my key in the lock, my phone was ringing in my hand. Worry flashed through my mind for a split second until I saw the number that flickered across. “Hello, Jax,” I said, laughing to myself.

  “Turn around.” I turned to see him leaned against the Batmobile like a modern-day James Dean, his phone to his ear. He looked like he belonged in a Lamborghini ad and not standing outside my house.

  “Yeah?”

  “Will you have dinner with me tomorrow?”

  “Jax, I don’t—”

  “Please.”

  “Alright,” I conceded. I turned back to fiddle with the door, balancing the phone between my ear and shoulder.

  “It’s a non-date-y date.” I could hear his smile through the phone. “And Liv?”

  “Yeah?” I asked. I opened the door, looking back at him over my shoulder.

  “Donut miss me too much.” The line went dead, but his hearty laugh danced all the way to the door as he strolled back to the driver’s side of the Batmobile. With one last wave, he was gone.

  The alarm on my phone blared rudely, startling me awake. According to my phone, it was 8:30 a.m. I laid there for a moment and rubbed my eyes, my body already begging for coffee. By the time I’d texted Ella to let her know I’d made it home safely and willed my brain to shut down, it was after 4 a.m.

  I groaned as I rolled out of bed, my feet reluctantly hitting the floor. I’d only had one glass of champagne, so why did I feel hungover? My stomach was jittery thinking about Jax and how much we’d connected the night before. My insides were a jumble of nerves. Was it possible to have an emotional hangover? Or perhaps it was because I was almost thirty-seven years old, and I’d stayed out all night like a teenager.

  My phone pinged with a text before I could even make it out of the bedroom.

  Ella: You have exactly one hour to get your adorable r
ockstar loving ass over here to tell me about last night, or I’m coming over.

  I chuckled as I typed out my response.

  Liv: Be there soon. Brew more coffee, and set up the IV, please.

  I padded into the kitchen and turned on the Keurig before I started back down the hall to the bathroom. I flicked the light on and turned the handle on the shower, letting steam fill the room. I caught a glimpse of my tired reflection in the mirror, my mind still reeling from the night before.

  Will you let me know you?

  Jax’s words echoed through my mind as I recalled how persistent he’d been the night before. My mind drifted to how handsome he’d looked leaned against the Batmobile when he dropped me off. The more I thought about it, the more I wondered if it had all been a dream.

  Whether it had happened or not didn’t really matter. What mattered was that it was back to work, and back to reality, now. There was no way in hell this dinner thing was happening.

  After a quick shower, I covered the dark circles under my eyes with some concealer so as not to frighten any customers I might have to see. I sprayed my scalp with a steady stream of dry shampoo in an attempt to make my hair look presentable. I slipped a hair tie around my wrist and tousled my hair on my way to the closet to throw on some clothes.

  I shoved my feet into my boots and went back to the kitchen to feed Mama who was nowhere to be seen and grabbed a cup of coffee on my way out the door. The walk to work was cool and drizzly, but I didn’t mind. The contrast of the chilly air and the warm coffee helped wake me up a bit. When I walked through the back door of the kitchen at 9:23 a.m., I already felt more alert. Ella stood waiting to interrogate me with the pot of coffee in her hand.

  “You had exactly seven more minutes before I came to beat down your door.” She refilled my coffee as I pulled my apron off the hook, tying it around me. I tossed my bag on the hook, and she handed my mug back to me. “Tell me everything.”

  “Okay. Let’s start with how Cash sure loved him some Ella.”

  “What?” She tilted her head quizzically, as though she had no clue what I was talking about. “No way.”

  “Girl, he made sure he was next to you all night,” I reminded her. “After you left, he said you were a pistol. He’s cute too.”

  She grabbed her own mug off the counter and filled it. “Yeah, he’s hot, but I hardly think a guy like him would be interested in some mom with a teenage daughter. Besides, I’ve only got this year before Grace goes off to college, so I’m not trying to find any distractions.”

  I raised my brow at her, but decided to drop it. “Where’s Katie?” I asked, surveying the kitchen and all of the cupcakes and tarts she’d already made. Damn, that girl was always on top of it.

  “Stocking the cases out front,” she responded impatiently, returning the coffee pot to its place on the counter. “So? Spill it. What happened? Did you guys make out?”

  “No.” I snorted, choking on my coffee. “Of course not.”

  “What do you mean, of course not? He’s a hot rockstar. Why wouldn’t you make out with him?”

  “It wasn’t like that.” I brushed her off. I pulled the binder that contained our orders off the counter, but before I could even open it, she’d snatched it out of my hands.

  “Okay then, what was it like?” She plopped the binder back down for effect.

  “He took me to get donuts.” I sighed and leaned against the counter, taking another glorious sip of my coffee. “Then, we went for a walk over in Berry Hill. He showed me one of the studios the band records at and this pie shop he really likes.”

  She narrowed her eyes. “So, you just went for a walk?”

  I shrugged. “Yeah. Pretty much.”

  “There’s something you’re not telling me.” She raised her brow at me accusatorily.

  My eyes shifted to the inside of my coffee cup. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

  “You little turkey.” She rounded on me, pointing her perfectly manicured nail in my direction. “Tell me. What happened? What did he say?”

  Ella hung on my every word as I recounted the events from the night before, complete with the Batmobile, the donut jokes, and how much we’d confided in each other. She grabbed my hand, a gasp escaping her lips, when I finally told her the question Jax asked me.

  “Will you let me know you?” Ella squealed. She took my face in her hands, causing me to narrowly avoid spilling my coffee. “That’s so fucking romantic. Oh my God. You’re gonna marry him. I can feel it in my bones.”

  “That is not happening.” I threw back the rest of my coffee and turned to wash my mug in the sink. “That’s honestly the furthest thing from my mind. It’s too soon.”

  I could see her out of the corner of my eye, watching my every movement as I washed my hands. “Okay. And? We don’t get to choose when we meet the right person, babe. Sometimes it happens when we least expect it.”

  “I love you,” I said, “but you’re out of your mind. You’ve seen one too many romcoms.”

  “Okay,” she conceded. “I’m not suggesting you marry him tomorrow, but he likes you. This very sweet, very charming, very hot guy is clearly smitten with you. And I know you, Liv. I can tell you like him too.”

  “How?” I dried my hands off and grabbed a pastry bag from the counter, loading it with the milk chocolate frosting Katie had already made. Avoiding her gaze, I moved to the large island in the center of the room where we did all of our decorating. “How can you tell?”

  “Gee, I don’t know,” she said sarcastically. “Maybe because you can’t even look at me when you talk about him?”

  “Because I’m trying to get to work.” I scoffed and began to swirl the frosting over the bare dark chocolate cupcakes.

  “Okay,” she said. She waited until I’d decorated the first cupcake before taking me by the shoulders, turning me to face her. “Look me in the eyes, and tell me you don’t like him.”

  “Ella.” I sighed, still looking at the undecorated cupcakes. “I don’t have time for this.”

  “Tell. Me.”

  “Fine. I don’t not like him, okay?”

  “I knew it.”

  “And he did ask me to have dinner with him tonight,” I confessed. “But I can’t. Honestly, he’s probably going to cancel anyway because that, what happened last night, is not real life.”

  “There’s a zero percent chance he’s going to cancel on you,” Ella said flatly. “Zero, because he likes you.”

  “Then I’ll have to cancel.” I shrugged. “I cannot go out with him again.”

  “Why the fuck not?”

  “Because he’s twenty-nine.”

  “Okay? So?”

  “So, he’s way too young for me,” I declared.

  “Oh my God, Olivia.” She shook me gently by the shoulders. “He is not.”

  “Yes, he is.” I threw my hands up. “Because as you keep pointing out, this guy is a freaking gorgeous rockstar, Ella. I’m an almost thirty-seven-year-old woman with a hostile kitty guarding an even more hostile uterus. I’ve already been traded in for a newer, younger model, and I’m not real anxious to go through that again with anyone.”

  “Honey, what Benton did to you was pure shit.” Her eyes softened toward me as she gave my arm a comforting squeeze. “But you can’t hold that against Jax. You can’t judge him based on what Benton did. You need to give Jax a chance to show you who he is. Let him know you, Liv.”

  “This is crazy. This whole Jax thing is not real life.” I turned my attention back to the cupcakes. “It’s a thing that happened, and now it’s done. Can we please move on?”

  “I hate to tell you, but this is real life,” she countered. “Yes, I know I keep pointing out that he’s this hot rockstar, but so what? That’s only a part of his life. That’s not who he is. From what I can tell, based on last night and what yo
u’ve told me, he’s also a really sweet guy who tells terrible jokes, and he sees you, Liv. I know that’s got to be scary after what happened with Benton, but you deserve to be seen, babe. You deserve someone who will treat you like the fucking goddess you are. You’re having dinner with him. Even if I have to drag you by that annoyingly perfect hair of yours. You’re go—”

  “Sorry to interrupt.” Katie’s voice came tentatively from the kitchen door. “The door is open, and there’s already a couple of customers up there. I’d take care of them, but we got a last-minute order I need to get started on.”

  “That’s okay.” I looked pointedly at Ella.

  “I’ll take care of them, Katie Bug.” Ella smiled at Katie as she moved toward the door. She tossed a knowing glance back in my direction. “But this conversation is not over.”

  I let out an exasperated sigh as I continued piping the frosting on top of the cupcakes. I tried to shift my focus to creating the perfect icing swirls, to Katie as she ticked off the details of the new order—to anywhere but Jaxon Slade.

  Chapter 6

  Jax

  “What the heck happened last night, Jax?” Dallas dug his fork into the giant omelet in front of him. “I’ve never seen you get all googly-eyed like that before, but the second Liv walked in you turned into a giant weirdo.”

  I sat across from him and Cash in the cafe on the ground floor of the hotel. Our server seated us in the rear corner, while Brady and a couple of the other security guys stood guard a few feet away in case any curious eyes tried to interrupt us. Luca was still in his room, no doubt having entertained a guest, and Derek had rented a Harley and set off on an early morning ride through some Tennessee hills.

  “I’m not gonna lie, you shocked the hell out of me.” Cash glanced over at me curiously before cutting into the fluffy stack of pancakes on his plate.

  “If I’m being completely honest, I shocked the hell out of myself.” I took a drink of my latte, savoring the feeling of the caffeine rushing through my system. I only managed to get about an hour of sleep. Even after I got back to the hotel, I couldn’t get my brain to shut off. Liv’s beautiful face was already etched in my mind as if I’d known her forever. I knew I was acting damn near crazy, but I couldn’t help it. I felt like I was being pulled into a current, and I wasn’t sure if she was going to let me sink or help me swim.