Finally, Jax held his glass to mine. He leaned in so only I could hear his voice, soft and low in my ear. “To the most incredible woman I’ll ever meet.”
A little before midnight, everyone filtered out except for Jax.
“I’ll call you tomorrow.” Ella gave me a knowing glance, leaning in to hug me.
“Okay.” I nodded, wrapping Grace in a hug. “I love y’all.”
“Love you too, Aunt Liv.” Grace’s smile lit up her face as she bounded after her mom.
“I’ll lock up,” Ella called before closing the patio door behind her, leaving me and Jax alone for the first time that day. We stood beneath one of the archways, and I gazed into his stormy blue eyes, which seemed to glow beneath the twinkle lights.
“I have one more gift for you,” Jax said softly. Offering me his arm, he led me back to the bonfire.
“Jax, you’ve done so much for me already.” He gestured for me to sit and withdrew the guitar from its case once more, sitting beside me. “I can never thank you enough for what you’ve done.”
“I wrote something for you.” His eyes found mine, and my heart thundered inside my chest. He began to strum a soft, slow melody with his eyes trained on mine. His voice was raw with feeling, and it became clear he was telling the story of how we met. By the time he reached the chorus, tears filled my eyes. “Can I hold your hand? Will you let me walk you to your door? I know we just met, and it’s 3 am, but all I want is more.”
I wiped at the tears that fell unchecked down my cheeks as he continued to sing.
“I want to be the man who is better than every other man that came before. So, give me a chance. May I have this dance? Baby, will you let me love you more?”
I couldn’t take my eyes off him as he strummed the last note. He returned the guitar to its case and pulled me to my feet, wrapping me in his arms.
“Jax, that was beautiful.” I pulled back so I could look into his soulful eyes. I could have burst into flames from the heat of his gaze.
“What do you say, Liv?”
“I don’t know what I did to deserve how truly wonderful you are.” I placed my hands on his firm chest, gripping his sweater. He wiped away the tears that spilled down my cheeks with the pads of his thumbs. “But I’m so scared, Jax.”
“Olivia.” He said my name softly, taking my face in his hands. “I’m falling in love with you.”
“Jax… I’m...” I trailed off, and he leaned in so close I could feel the warmth of his breath on my lips. For a second, I swear my heart forgot to beat.
“Fresh out of excuses?” He finished for me, leaning in closer, waiting. Waiting for my answer. Waiting for my permission.
For the first time in as long as I could remember, I didn’t think. I didn’t question if I deserved it or if I was good enough.
“I’m falling in love with you too,” I whispered, tugging his shirt, pulling him closer.
“Yeah?”
I nodded, and I felt him sigh with relief.
He kissed me tenderly at first, his soft lips grazing mine. My hands slid up his chest and behind his neck, and as I gently pulled him closer, his kiss grew more and more fervent.
When I finally broke our kiss, we were both breathless. He kissed the top of my head, wrapping me in his arms. “I can’t tell you how bad I’ve been wanting to do that.”
Chapter 16
Jax
The next morning, the sound of a soft rain tapping against Liv’s bedroom window caused me to stir. I’d fallen asleep with her in my arms and woke with her body still folded into mine.
After we’d put out the bonfire and turned off the lights outside, we’d kissed our way back to her bedroom where I’d kissed her over and over and over again.
I didn’t try to push it further, though I definitely wanted to. I wanted her. I wanted to be close to her, but I also knew that her allowing herself to feel what she felt for me was a huge step—one I didn’t take for granted. I knew she was still fighting with feelings of not being good enough, though it killed me that she ever felt anything less than perfect.
She’d been with her ex for nearly half her life. I knew it would take a while for all her walls to come down, and I was okay with that because I was in it for the long haul. I just had to show her.
I heard her soft sigh, and she shifted slightly, causing the covers to fall so her shoulder was exposed. The strap on her tank top had slipped down, so I returned it to where it belonged. I tightened my arms around her, kissing her shoulder blade. “Good morning,” I murmured in her ear. I felt her body respond as she turned toward me, kissing me lightly.
“It’s really unfair you know.” Her voice was still raspy with sleep.
“What is?” I asked, playing with a piece of her silky hair.
“That you actually wake up looking like this.” She laughed, wrapping herself around me and nestling her head into my chest.
“Speak for yourself.” I gently rubbed my fingertips along her bare arm and kissed her forehead. “You’re beautiful, Liv. You’re breathtaking.”
Her fingers traced circles along my bare chest sending shivers all throughout my body. “I want to lay here with you all day.”
“That sounds like the perfect rainy Sunday to me.”
“How much longer do you have before you have to go back out on the road?”
“We leave Tuesday morning.” I groaned at the thought of having to leave her. “It’s only for a month, and then we’re off for the holidays. We may end up with a couple of appearances we have to make, but nothing crazy. I don’t want to leave you.”
“I know,” she said softly, “but I’ll still be here when you get back.”
“Promise?”
“I promise.” She lifted her head off my shoulder, planting a kiss firmly on my lips. “And I can come to visit you in Louisville too.”
“There’s nothing for me back in Louisville but an apartment that, for the most part, collects dust,” I insisted. “What I want is right here in Nashville. I’ll be coming back here, but I don’t have to stay here if that’s too much too soon. I can always get a hotel room.”
“I want you here.” Her hand found mine, and she intertwined our fingers.
My heart caught in my throat. I want you here. “I’ve got to say, I love hearing you say that.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah,” I replied. “I was so nervous last night, Liv. When I told you how I felt, I thought it might push you away.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I know I haven’t made this easy on you.”
I rolled over so that I hovered over her. “You have nothing to apologize for, baby. Nothing. I get why you’ve been scared, but I want to show you I think you’re fucking perfect, Olivia Sinclair.”
“Speak for yourself.” She pulled my face down to hers and kissed me slow and deep. “How about I make us some breakfast?”
“How about you let me do the cooking since it’s technically still your birthday weekend?” I trailed a string of kisses along her jawline before my lips found hers again.
“You’re spoiling me already.” Her emerald green eyes glowed as she chewed on her bottom lip. I felt myself coming undone.
“For the record, every time you bite your lip…” I brought my face so close to hers, I could feel her breath catch beneath me when her lips parted. Her lips were pillowy like little rose-colored clouds. “It drives me crazy in the best of ways.”
“Is that so?” A flirtatious smile spread across her face, and she bit her lip once more.
Damn, she had me. She had me wrapped around her little finger already. “Oh, is that how you’re gonna play this?” I brushed her lips with mine before plunging my hands into her sides, tickling her. She squealed and wriggled beneath me as I continued my tickle attack. Finally, I gave in to her giggling pleas for me to stop, and I k
issed her hard. “Come on, I’m making waffles.”
We lazed about together all day Sunday, covering each other in kisses. The only moments we’d been apart were the few she’d spent on the back patio that afternoon talking to Ella on the phone. I’d come into the kitchen for another cup of coffee when I saw Liv leaning up against the railing outside with a soft blush on her cheeks and a smile on her face. She was the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. Everything about her drew me in like the first sunny day after a cold, dark winter. All I wanted to do was bask in her rays.
The next day, I joined Liv at work. The rest of the guys came to the store to visit and say goodbye to Liv, Ella, Katie, and Grace, who showed up after school.
I loved how easily she fit in with the guys. I watched while Liv attempted to show Dallas how to make a cherry pie. They erupted into a fit of giggles when he somehow managed to get the red goo all over his hands, looking like he’d committed a heinous crime. He’d chased Katie around the room, acting like he was going to wipe the evidence all over her. Even Luca, who didn’t really warm up to new people, seemed to have a certain affection for Liv.
Cash loved the girls. It was evident in the way he never stopped smiling when he was around them. It was the happiest I’d seen him in a long time. He was also ready and willing to do anything he could to make Jax & Liv a thing, but he didn’t push. He wanted it to be on Liv’s terms.
After the guys left and we closed up the shop, we walked back to Liv’s bungalow hand in hand. Mama hissed her hellos to us as we bounded through the door. She watched with annoyed curiosity as we cooked dinner together, clearly put out that I was still invading her home territory.
I wrapped my arms around Liv’s waist, nuzzling my face in her hair while she chopped the vegetables for the soup she was making. I inhaled her sweet citrusy scent, knowing I could never get enough of moments like these. We continued our new tradition of picking songs to play that would make the other dance. I loved the way she threw her head back with laughter when I made a complete fool of myself, which I did often just to make her smile.
“Okay.” I rubbed my hands together as she passed me to put the pot of soup on the stove. “It’s my turn to pick a song.”
“Lay it on me,” she said. “I’m ready.”
I scrolled through the music on my phone until I landed on the song I was looking for. “Can’t Help Falling In Love” began to play as she turned to face me. “May I have this dance?” I extended my hand to her, and she took it, letting me pull her close. She smiled up at me, sliding her arms around my neck. “I’m going to miss you so much, Liv.” I leaned into her, placing a soft kiss on her forehead.
“I’m going to miss you too.” She pulled my face down to meet hers, brushing her lips against mine.
I leaned in so that our foreheads touched as we danced together in the kitchen. I soaked up every second of feeling her in my arms, becoming more and more aware that after tonight I wouldn’t be able to hold her like this for so many days. Too many. Finally, I said the words I hadn’t planned on saying. “Come with me.”
“What?” Her face was veiled with shock as though there was no way she could have heard me correctly.
“Come with me,” I murmured. “We could work on some new music, and we’d be together.”
“I can’t do that.” She shook her head. “I’d love to be with you. You know I would, but I can’t just leave.”
“Consider it a Jax & Liv trial run,” I tried to persuade her.
“I can’t leave the business right now, and Grace’s homecoming dance is this weekend. I have to be here to see her off.”
I thought back to my conversation with Grace from Liv’s birthday, and I knew what I was asking of her was crazy. “I know. I’m sorry. I’m just going to miss you so damn much.”
“I know. I am too, but this is something we’re going to have to figure out how to deal with. At least, until our own music takes off.”
“I know,” I admitted. I didn’t love it, but I knew she was right. I also knew I would do whatever I had to in order to make it work. “How about this? I could fly you out sometime after Grace’s dance for a few days. A long weekend even.”
She sighed. “I want to, but I don’t know if I can get away from work. It’s close to Halloween, and we get so busy with orders.”
“You don’t have to answer me now.” I held her face in my hands and kissed her gently. “Just think about it.”
She smiled up at me. “I will. I promise.”
I hoped she would because the thought of being without her for the next month hurt like hell.
Chapter 17
Liv
“I don’t want to leave you,” Jax whispered early the next morning, pulling me into his arms on the steps of my front porch. The sun was barely up. Brady had arrived to get Jax so he’d have time to pack his things at the hotel before their bus pulled out of Nashville.
“I know. It’s going to be okay,” I said with a little more confidence than I felt. I had no doubt my feelings for Jax were real, that our feelings were real, but I also knew this was still very new. It was fragile, and we were trying to figure it all out together. A month apart right off the bat was a hurdle, but not one I thought we couldn’t handle. At least, I hoped we could handle it.
In many ways, my mind was still trying to play catch up with my heart. Jax was something I never saw coming. It was crazy to think that a few days ago we’d been strangers, but now the idea of having to be apart for a month crushed me. Regardless of what happened with our own music, I knew I would support his career ambitions because I never wanted him to be in the position I’d been in all those years ago. I never wanted him to feel he had to choose between me or his dreams.
“Liv, I need you to promise me something.” His eyes were partly cloudy with a chance of thunderstorms. “Promise me you’ll still be here for me to come back to. Please.”
“Jax, I promise. I’m going to still be here.” I cupped his face in my hands and brought his lips to mine.
“Yeah?” His voice was low and husky as he intertwined his fingers with mine.
“Yeah,” I said softly, standing on my tiptoes to kiss him. “But you better go before Brady kills us both.” I waved to Brady who was waiting in the car to give us privacy. He dipped his head in greeting before turning his attention elsewhere.
“I know.” Jax sighed, enveloping me in his embrace.
“Let me know when you guys get to Louisiana? And tell the guys we’ll miss them.”
“What about me?” A playful expression spread across his face. “Will you miss me?”
I grinned up at him, my arms encircled around his neck. “Mmm-hmm.”
“How much?”
“I donut think I can put it into words.” I smiled and bit my lip.
“Now you’re trying to kill me, huh?” He laughed and lifted me off the ground, bringing us nose to nose. “I’m going to miss you so much.” He set me back on my feet and kissed me. It was one of those kisses that was a thousand kisses wrapped in one. It was soft and sweet, full of desire and longing. It was a hello and a goodbye all at once.
“I’ll miss you too.” He released me and trailed his hand down my arm, his fingers mingling with mine. He bounded toward Brady’s waiting SUV parked on the street.
I turned to go inside, afraid I would dissolve into tears if I watched his car pull away, but Jax’s voice caught my attention. “Turn around!” When I did, he was leaning out the passenger side window, making a heart shape with his hands. “You’re perfect, Olivia Sinclair!”
I blew him a kiss that he pretended to catch as Brady pulled the car away from the curb. Though I was sad to see him leave, I realized for the first time in a long time my heart was nothing but happy.
“What do you mean you didn’t have sex with him?” Ella asked incredulously later that morning, leaning against the c
ounter at the bakery. She watched intently while I drizzled ganache over the top of some mint chocolate cupcakes. Katie was out front, loading the cases for the day, which left Ella to interrogate me. “Jax stayed with you for three nights, and you didn’t have sex with him? Did you at least want to?”
“Of course I wanted to,” I cried. “Have you seen him? He’s gorgeous. I’m just not there yet.”
“Honey, I feel like he could get you there.” She crossed her arms across her chest. “The man’s abs have abs for crying out loud.”
“That is not what I meant.” I rolled my eyes.
“What is it then?” She moved so that she stood next to me, watching my every move. “He literally told you he’s falling in love with you, and I know you’re falling for him.”
“I know, but I’m not ready.” I sighed. “Ella, I was with Ben for seventeen years of my life. He’s the only person I’ve ever been with.”
“I know, and what a snoozefest that was.” She snorted before looking up, catching the pained expression on my face. “Well, he was, but that’s all the more reason you should have done it. You deserve to experience what it feels like to be absolutely worshipped.”
“Look, I want all of these things. I do,” I said. “but I’m not ready. There’s so much that goes into… that… I want to be ready.”
“Ohhhh… did you not have a bikini wax? I told you, you really have to keep that up. Otherwise, it turns into the swamp thing down there.”
I burst into laughter, placing the remainder of the ganache on the counter. “My affairs are in order down there,” I joked. “I don’t know. I’m just nervous. No other man has seen me naked in my entire life but Ben. It’s scary. Then there’s the age difference and the fact that he looks like that. You should see him with his shirt off. His chest is so firm and smooth and…”
“And you want to lick that ganache right off of it?” Ella squealed.
“Pretty much,” I admitted. “I’m scared he’s going to be… disappointed. I don’t exactly have a rock hard body like he does.”
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