Seer

by Raven Dark

  No one else spoke, and I didn’t know what to say either. Pregnant? A baby? Maker, was it possible? I’d have been lying if I said I didn’t feel a little like passing out myself. Or maybe that was just whatever Doc had put in my tea. The pain was almost gone, but in that numb way one gets when drugged, like it was throbbing faintly from behind a fog.

  I looked at each of my men. Sheriff started pacing the room like a caged animal. Hawk stood with his hands clasped behind his back, the picture of Yantu calm, but even for him, he looked too calm. His expression was blank, and I had a near comical impression he was trying desperately to find his Fortress.

  Doc cleared his throat forcefully and stood up. “Now, let’s not get excited just yet, men. I have to run some tests, but I’m going with my gut on this. Aside from the symptoms, the internal exam tells me she’s presenting like a woman who is pregnant. But it’s too soon to tell until I run some tests.”

  He looked at me. “How are you feeling now? Is the pain any less?”

  I nodded. “It’s lessening.”

  “I’ll take a little blood, but the important thing now is that she gets some rest. I’ll come and check on you first thing in the morning, all right, Setora?”

  Again, I nodded. He squeezed my shoulder.

  While Hawk sat on one side of me, and Steel stayed on the other, no one spoke. Doc took a sample of my blood, and Sheriff and Pretty Boy went over to the hearth. They spoke too quietly for me to hear.

  When Doc was finished, he put the vial of blood into his kit and looked at all of them. “Okay, men, let’s give her some space so she can rest.”

  No one moved.

  Hawk slipped his hand into mine. I wished I knew what he was thinking. Steel leaned over, stroking my forehead again. His face didn’t look like a ghost anymore, but I could tell he still didn’t know what to say.

  Doc dropped his arms, picked up his kit and left, shaking his head at them with a knowing smile the whole time.

  Once the doors were closed, I looked at Hawk again. He stood up and slipped into bed beside me, leaning with his head on the headboard. He pulled me to him so that my back rested on his chest and closed his arms around me. His palms rested on my belly.

  “Everything’s going to be ok, Kitten.” His voice was low and calm in my ear. “But you have to get some rest. We’ll talk in the morning.”

  A drug-induced sleep took over. Blackness swam in, and I still had no idea what any of my men thought.

  Pregnant. Maker.

  * * *

  Voices reached my ears, piercing the veil of sleep. Sunlight stabbed at my eyes, and I blinked them open, turning my head from the glare.

  “Morning, Kitten.”

  Hawk sat beside me in the chair Steel had been in late last night. He’d been watching me, I thought, and now leaned forward, stroking my cheek. Doc stood beside him; it had been their voices I’d heard.

  “Morning, Master,” I croaked.

  “How are you feeling, Setora?’ Doc asked. “Any pain?”

  “No, sir.”

  There wasn’t. I felt refreshed, to the point where, if I hadn’t known better, I’d have thought last night’s pain was just a terrible dream.

  Hawk stood and dropped a warm kiss on my forehead. “I’ll go get you some breakfast. Behave for Doc.”

  He left, and Doc took the chair he’d vacated.

  “It’s still too early to tell anything from the blood tests I did last night, so we don’t know yet if you’re pregnant,” he said, as if reading my thoughts.

  I nodded and sat up in the bed. “You said yesterday that you wanted to tell me something about Adeline. And did you get the results from those tests you did on her and the other Violets?”

  He sighed. “As far as the blood tests, I didn’t find much. None of the blood turned blue or changed color in any abnormal way.”

  I bit my lip, trying to hide my disappointment, but I mustn’t have done it well, because he set his hand on my shoulder, comforting.

  “I’m sorry, Setora. I was hoping for better. But I haven’t given up. We will find something soon.”

  “I know you will.” I gave him a smile I hoped looked better than it felt.

  “Now, as far as Adeline, the news is a little more interesting.”

  “Which is?”

  “Let me back up a little, first. When I did your surgery after what happened with Madi’san, I noticed you had a mark on your inner thigh.”

  I swallowed. “A stari.”

  “Yes. Do you know what that mark means?”

  I cleared my throat. I’d probably never be comfortable talking about that mark. I didn’t know what it meant at the time, but my mother had always told me never to mention to anyone that I had it. And Damien’s doctors had interrogated me about it, leaving me to believe it was as dangerous as my mother’s warnings always implied.

  “I don’t know exactly what it means, no. But Saketh’s reaction to it made me think it has something to do with fertility.”

  “Saketh? He saw it?”

  “No. When I offered myself in exchange for letting everyone go, he said I wouldn’t be worth it unless I had a stari. I told him I had one. He called me Worldmaker. Then his whole attitude changed toward me. Like I was worth a lot more to him.”

  “Hmm.” Doc sat back and scratched his chin. “This goes along with what I’ve always thought. Well, anyway, I wanted you to know that Adeline has a stari, too.”

  My brows went up. A slow, fascinated smile tugged at my lips. There was another woman like me.

  “Do you think it’s a coincidence that Adeline has a stari and she’s having triplets?”

  “Absolutely not. I talked to her doctors. She’s the only one who’s become pregnant in this household since Lord Falnar’s twenties and the only one in his harem who has a stari.”

  A knock sounded on the door, and Doc looked over his shoulder. “Come in.”

  A servant entered with a tray of food. “Master Hawk said he’d check on you in an hour, Mistress.” The servant set the food down on a table. “He says you’re to eat and rest”

  Once she left, I dug into my breakfast while Doc and I talked. It felt good to have my appetite back and no nausea.

  I’d wished Doc had found answers about what was going on with me, but there was nothing to do but trust that the answers would come in time.

  Lord Falnar’s kitchen staff had given me more than enough food; a tray laden with toast, a scrambled egg, a bowl of oatmeal. All light foods, fitting for a pregnant woman. They’d sent up tea with honey, rather than iris root. The absence of the anti-contraceptive powder jumped out at me, a reminder of my condition I wasn’t sure I was ready to face. I had enough to deal with right now. One thing at a time.

  When I was done, I went into the water closet and dressed, pulling on a simple pastel blue cadris Hawk must have left for me. When I returned to the bed, pain sliced at me, cutting across my lower belly. Exactly as it had before.

  I groaned and staggered toward the bed. Doc was out of his chair in an instant.

  “Setora.” He helped me lay down on the mattress. “What’s wrong? The pain again?”

  I nodded, folding in on myself. That slicing feeling intensified until it made my head swim.

  Doc bent over me, but before he could examine me, someone knocked on the door again.

  “Come.”

  One of Lord Falnar’s guards stuck his head in. “Excuse me, Doc. They said you’d be here. Adeline’s in labor, and she’s calling for you. She needs you right away.”

  “All right. Tell her I’ll be there in a moment.” He hurried for his medical bag on the table. “Setora, I’ll send someone up here to keep an eye on you.”

  What made me do it, I didn’t know, but before I knew it, I was peeling myself off the bed and clutching my belly. “Wait, Doc, I’m going with you.”

  He rounded on me. “Absolutely not.”

  Ignoring the pain that threatened to double me over, I went for the doors.
<
br />   “Setora, you’re in pain. You’re not going anywhere. Get back in bed. Adeline’s going to be fine. I’ll do everything in my power to make sure she’s all right.”

  I turned from the door, forcing myself not to sway on my feet, and looked him straight in the eyes. “I have to be there,” I said slowly. “I don’t know why I have to, but I do. I’m going with or without you.”

  When I turned for the doors, to the guard waiting there, I caught his wide-eyed look.

  As soon I realized what I’d said, I knew it was imperative that I see Adeline now. I didn’t know what was pulling me to her, but the feeling would not be ignored.

  Behind me, I heard Doc growl. “Sheriff’s going to kill me.” Then he was at my side. “Guard, tell Sheriff that Setora’s coming with me.”

  I was already staggering down the hall without waiting for him to follow. His footsteps hurried across the floor tiles.

  “Never a dull moment with you, Setora.” He squeezed my shoulder, falling into step with me.

  Lord Falnar’s slave quarters couldn’t have been more than a few minutes from our wing, but right then, it felt like miles. The closer we drew to the doors, the harder it became to keep moving, but I tamped the pain down, resisted the urge to lean on Doc, and forced myself to keep walking.

  I made myself keep my back straight, my face neutral, giving away nothing of I felt. If Doc sensed me struggling, he’d never have let me go with him.

  Whatever was pulling me toward Adeline had become like a tether tugging on me, always tugging, reeling me in. The slicing in my gut had turned to a razor-sharp stab now, making me nauseous in its intensity.

  Once, while practicing the Don-shi, Hawk had told me that Yantu warriors were trained to use their Fortress exercise to shut out pain in battle. It’s what kept warriors fighting even when they were gravely injured.

  Instinctively, I pictured my garden, letting the image of its serenity, its perfection, fill my mind. Walling out the pain that had slashed like lightning across my back and stomach.

  I could barely stand. It felt like my spine had been severed. It was all I could do not to grab Doc’s shoulder in a death grip, to focus on keeping my breathing slow and even. The Fortress. All I had to do was find my Fortress. In that place of peace, the pain would no longer exist.

  No such luck. The image of the garden in my mind shattered like glass, as if the pain had broken it apart.

  How in the Maker’s name did the Yantu do this?

  Instead, I focused on Adeline, on the unseen thread that continued pulling me toward her.

  Finally, we arrived at the harem quarters.

  I barely noticed the guards opening doors, servants passing us in the halls, slaves walking this way and that. I went immediately to a white, ornate door. When I entered, I caught a glimpse of billowy pink curtains and sunlight through the windows.

  The pain in my stomach flared as if it were on fire, and the knife slashing at my back dug deeper until I hissed between my teeth. My knees nearly gave out, but I pressed on.

  Before I knew it, I stood at Adeline’s bedside, my hand in hers.

  “Setora,” Adeline puffed, her eyes glazed with pain. “Thank the Maker, you’re here.”

  “Of course I’m here.” I felt myself smile, as if my lips moved of their own accord. The pain still radiated, and yet looking into her eyes, calm washed over me. I was exactly where I needed to be. I laid my hand on her sweat-soaked brow. “Try to relax, Adeline. I’m going to take you somewhere now.”

  “It’s hurts.” Adeline’s eyes welled with tears. “I can’t…it’s too much.”

  Instinctively, I reached out, finding the knot of thoughts that weren’t mine, the blaring, intense light that was her mind. Sending all the calm and soothing energy I could to her.

  “I know. Where we’re going, there won’t be any pain. Only comfort, while we wait for your babies to greet the world.”

  Someone spoke behind me, but I was too focused on Adeline to pick up what they’d said. A moment later, I felt hands on me, lowering me onto a soft surface—a chair, I thought, but I didn’t remove my hand from Adeline’s.

  “Look at me, Adeline,” I told her gently. “Keep your eyes on me. Breathe with me.” I drew in long, slow breaths and let them out, watching her do the same. Watching her eyes lock on mine, as if hypnotized.

  Adeline’s breathing evened out, and her body seemed to relax into the bed.

  “Close your eyes.”

  Her eyes closed.

  Rain. I let the trigger word float through my mind, repeating itself like a mantra while I formed the garden in my mind. Perfect blue sky, rolling meadow, the smell of grass. I imagined that place, my Fortress, appearing in Adeline’s mind. Or perhaps I brought her into mine, drawing her there.

  Adeline’s face relaxed. Then a slow, mystified smile touched her lips.

  “So beautiful.”

  In my mind, I pictured us sitting cross-legged in the soft grass, hands clasped, breathing in and out.

  Peace, Adeline. There is only peace here. No pain.

  Slowly, the pain began to recede until my own body relaxed. Eyes open now, she stared at the ceiling, but I had the feeling she wasn’t seeing it.

  And that she didn’t feel the pain anymore.

  Time seemed to stand still. We continued to breathe in and out.

  Somewhere in the distance, a baby cried.

  I thought I heard Doc’s voice, but it was muffled and seemed to be coming down a long tunnel. I turned my head. Between Adeline’s knees, Doc straightened, holding a tiny bundle in his arms. He handed it to someone who swaddled the baby in a pale pink blanket.

  I leaned toward Adeline, rubbing the back of her hand. “You’re doing great, Adeline—”

  “…breech. The second one is breech,” someone said. “We need to turn the baby.”

  Adeline’s breathing hissed in and out, and her hand flexed in mine. I returned my focus to her, once more picturing the garden, building the Fortress around her mind. Shutting out her panic, her pain.

  She relaxed, her breathing turning even again.

  “Come on.” Doc’s voice again. “Come on, little one, turn around for us.”

  Putting Adeline’s mind aside in my own thoughts, I focused on another mind, on the distant, undefined thoughts coming from inside Adeline’s body. I laid my hand on her stomach while Doc leaned down between her knees.

  “It’s a stubborn one.” Doc’s voice floated through my thoughts. “He’s not turning.”

  Turn. In my mind, the image of a baby formed, and I imagined her slowly revolving, tucking herself in, rolling.

  Turn.

  “There we are.” Doc’s head lifted. His gaze took in my palm on Adeline’s belly, then dropped between her legs, then shot back up to me. His brows went almost to his hairline, and his cheeks lost color.

  Once more focused on Adeline, still sitting with my hand on her belly, I recreated the garden, walling us in.

  Time stood still again. Peace. Even breaths.

  Another baby cried.

  I wiped the sweat from Adeline’s brow. “You’re doing just fine, Adeline. One more to go.”

  Her hand tightened in mine, and she nodded.

  I closed my eyes. The world fell away. There was only the garden. Time did not exist within my meadow Fortress, and yet somehow, I knew that around us eternity was eking by.

  A third cry sounded, and I thought I heard someone cooing.

  Heartbeats filled my head. Adeline’s and mine, though how I knew that, I had no idea. One set of beats—Adeline’s—slowed, falling out of sync with mine, then getting slower still.

  Time to return to the real world.

  I opened my eyes and startled. Five pairs of eyes stared at me. Doc, Serena, two assistants, and Adeline’s personal doctor, all stood watching me, looking stunned.

  Fatigue and dizziness, as much mine as Adeline’s, flooded me, as though the moment I’d left the protection of my garden, the toll of everything
I’d done hit me all at once. I slumped in the chair, almost falling out of it to the floor.

  Serena rushed to my side and steadied me. “Tari,” she called.

  The door opened, and Tari came in. She crossed the room and helped me out of the chair.

  “Please take her to the other room and look after her until Doc is finished with Adeline.”

  Tari gave Serena a nod and gently helped me from the room. Gita appeared at my other side and the two women led me to a chaise, propping me up with cushions.

  Gita found a passing slave and whispered something to her about food, then came back to us.

  Food. Light, I was beyond famished. There was no pain now, but my stomach growled incessantly.

  When the food came, the tray had enough cheese, bread, and wine for three people. I ate slowly, savoring every bite while Gita and Tari sat with me, picking a few cheese slices from my plate.

  Yaela joined us and we talked, or rather the three of them did, while I nodded—at what I hoped were all the right places.

  The connection between my mind and Adeline’s was still there, not just the buzzing I always felt with Violets, but the much stronger link that had somehow established itself between us when I was back in Hawk’s room. That connection should have severed when the babies had been born, now that the danger was over. It hadn’t, but I was too tired to figure out why, not that I would have known how to cut it, anyway.

  And not that it was unpleasant. There was no pain at all now; I felt only peace and joy from Adeline—and fatigue, like she wanted to sleep for a week.

  So did I, come to think of it.

  Tari, Gita and Yaela didn’t seem effected, a fact that jumped out at me and refused to be ignored.

  Through the daze of my own tiredness, it hit me that I could feel three new minds, hums that carried unfamiliar tunes, nestled in the corners of my thoughts.

  The babies. A smile spread across my face.

  “Setora?” Tari leaned toward me.

  “The babies,” I said softly. “They’re doing fine.”

  She exchanged a look with Gita and Yaela.

  “I can feel them. Such strong minds for such tiny bodies.”