WOMEN OF SURPRISE 02: Lydia's Passion

by Tracey J. Lyons

  "A picnic?" As she jumped up and down, it was clear that Laura was as excited as Lydia.

  "Yes. A picnic down by the pond."

  "I'm going to change into play clothes. There's a big bullfrog I've been hearing every night for the past week, and I want to catch him." Robert ran ahead of the ladies and reached the house well before they did.

  It could have been her imagination, but Lydia felt certain that the sky looked a little bluer and the birds were chirping a bit more merrily than they'd been an hour earlier. She felt ready to burst with all of the happiness welling up inside of her.

  Taking Laura's hands in hers, she spun her around and around. "We're going on a picnic!"

  Peals of delight came from the little girl. "Papa is taking time from his work, Miss Lydia."

  "I know. Isn't it wonderful?"

  "Yippee!" Letting go of her, Laura ran into the house after her brother to change into play clothes as well.

  By the time she caught up to them, they were ready to go. Mrs. Sutherland greeted her at the door.

  "Good afternoon, Miss," Mrs. Sutherland greeted her.

  "Hello, Mrs. Sutherland."

  "Mr. Judson wants you to meet him down by the pond. I've packed up supper and found a quilt that you can spread on the ground."

  "How kind of you." The aromas floating out of the basket made her mouth water. The children pushed past them and ran outside. Laughing at their antics, Lydia said, "I think those two are more than ready to go."

  Placing her hands on rounded hips, Mrs. Sutherland agreed. "This is good for them. You're good for them ... and for Mr. Judson."

  Surprised by her comment, Lydia found herself momentarily speechless.

  Joining her on the porch, the kindly woman looked at her with concern. "I didn't mean to embarrass you."

  "You didn't," she lied.

  "It's just that I haven't seen this family so happy in a very long time. I think you're responsible for that."

  "Mrs. Sutherland, you flatter me. But I think they are just finally allowing themselves to heal. I imagine they all had a horrible time after Alexander's wife died."

  "Yes, they did. Until you came to town, I thought he was going to let the grief swallow him whole." Fussing with her apron, she added, "I'm glad you're a part of their lives."

  Stunned into silence, Lydia accepted the basket and blanket from her and turned to follow the children down to the pond. Finding them standing near the edge of the water, Lydia hurried over to them.

  "Don't step too close to the water." She set the basket on the grassy knoll and peered over their shoulders to see what they were looking at.

  "I told you it would be a big one!" Robert had a stick in his hand. Using it to push the bright green algae away from the edge of the pond, he exposed a large, dimply pond scum-covered green frog.

  His sister shrieked at the sight of it, and jumped back from the edge of the pond. "I hate frogs! Yuck. You can have it, Robert."

  Lydia laughed and offered, "Why don't you help me set up our picnic?"

  The idea must have appealed to Laura, for she skipped happily ahead of Lydia with the blanket in hand. Finding a smooth patch of ground, Laura started to spread the blanket.

  "Here, let me help you." Setting the basket against the trunk of the tree, Lydia took one end and fluffing it into the air, waited for the soft cotton fabric to settle on the tender blades of grass.

  Walking around all four edges, she smoothed it out as best she could. "There, that should do."

  "I can climb trees." Laura declared while swinging from a low branch. Her small hands gripped the bark with all her might while she swung back and forth like a monkey. "Robert's been showing me how."

  Peering up through the leafy branches, Lydia remembered all the summers she'd spent climbing trees with Maggie and Abigail. My, but that was a long time ago, she thought, envying Laura's energy.

  Today, climbing trees was the last thing on her mind. Right now, she was wondering about Alexander, dreaming about how he felt about her, if he were ready to let her into his life. Thinking he might just, if luck were on her side, want her to be his next wife and a mother to his children.

  While the wonderful, dreamy thoughts swam around in her head, Lydia hugged her arms about her waist losing herself to the giddy feeling of being in love. She didn't notice Laura when she let go of the low branch, or when she'd moved around to the far side of the tree out of sight.

  It wasn't until a shout from somewhere above her head reached her that she became aware that Laura wasn't where she'd last seen her. Looking up into the maze of branches, Lydia's heart caught in the throat.

  "Laura Judson what are you doing way up there?"

  The child had to be eight feet off the ground. While the height might not seem high to Laura, it was terrifying for Lydia to see her up there.

  "I told you I knew how to climb trees. Look at me, Miss Lydia! I'm like a bird." Laura began to flap her arms like a bird. "Chirp, chirp," she sang out.

  Lydia felt the panic grip her. Dear God! What if she fell? Taking a deep breath, she released it and called out, "Laura, honey, you need to come down from there right now."

  Oblivious to her request, Laura sang louder and flapped her arms faster, harder. A loud crack followed by a snapping noise rended the air.

  "Laura!" Lydia shrieked, running to where the little girl was falling out of the tree. Oh no! She wasn't going to reach her in time. Lurching forward, with her arms flung out, Lydia made every effort to catch her.

  The muscles in her upper arms and shoulders were straining, flexing, stretching as far as was humanly possible. She thought everything would be all right. Just then, a worn piece of fabric and petticoats slipped through her fingers.

  Alexander was coming up the hill by the pond. Spotting Robert, he gave a quick "hello" and waved to his son, who appeared to be having himself a grand time tormenting a bull frog. Pulling his hat from his head, he ran a hand through his hair searching for Lydia and Laura.

  Passing by Robert he shouted, "Where are your sister and Miss Lydia?" He'd gotten stuck at work and had to rush a customer out the door so he could get here for the picnic.

  Alex had looked forward to nothing else all afternoon.

  "Up under the tree, Laura's acting like a girl. She's afraid of my frog."

  Alex laughed. Of course Laura was acting that way she was a little girl-his little girl, growing up so fast with her mother's eyes and his smile. He caught a flash of red hair and knew he'd found them.

  He saw Lydia kneeling on the ground and wondered what she was doing. Thinking she might need some help unpacking their supper, he hurried along. By the time he reached her, he realized she wasn't unpacking the basket at all.

  "Lydia! What's going on?" He'd felt as if he'd been punched in the stomach, the breath whooshed from his lungs.

  Sobbing, Lydia answered, "She fell from the tree."

  "Dear God!" Pushing her aside, Alex knelt beside his daughter who was crying softly. Without another thought, he scooped her up into his arms.

  Pushing Lydia aside, he started running towards his house. Sweat poured from him as his feet pounded along the ground. This couldn't be happening again, was all he kept thinking.

  "Laura, Papa is here. You're going to be all right." Crooning those words to her, Alex kept moving at the frantic pace until he reached the porch. He ran up the steps two at a time and shoved the door open with his shoulder, bounding into the house.

  Settling in the chair by the fireplace, he took a closer look at his daughter. Her breath was coming in big gulps. "Laura, tell me where you're hurt."

  Her face was splotchy from crying. In quick, jerky motions she pointed to her right arm. Alex sucked in his breath when he saw the twist in her arm.

  Vaguely aware of Lydia and Robert hovering behind them, he barked, "Robert, run to town and get the doctor."

  The boy was out the door before Alex had finished getting the command out. Gently, he started rocking his wounded daught
er. Pulling her close to his chest, the sounds of her crying muffled against him. He felt his heart breaking all over again.

  How could this be happening to them? The only thing he could see was Laura lying on the ground like a rag doll. Where had Lydia been? How could she have allowed this to happen?

  He saw the hand reaching out to smooth Laura's hair from her brow. Reaching out, he caught her wrist in his hand. "I can take care of my daughter." Just like he was supposed to have taken care of his wife?

  He'd been late when Joanna had fallen and died. And he'd been late today. It was almost unthinkable that the same tragedy could have befallen him yet again. The pain and shame of his guilt took away any sane thoughts.

  Beneath his grip her cold hand trembled.

  Repeating the words, as if to remind himself of his responsibilities, he whispered, "I can take care of her." Pushing aside the hand that reached out to help him, he begged Lydia, "Please leave us alone."

  Looking up into those familiar green eyes he willed himself not to care that they were brimming with tears and that her face was pale with fear, he ordered in a broken voice, "Leave."

  "Alexander, you don't mean that." Her voice was a whisper, the tears spilling unchecked down her cheeks.

  Ignoring her, he buried his face in his daughter's hair choking back a strangled sob unable to speak.

  Backing away from them, Lydia went to stand silhouetted in the open doorway, watching for Robert and the doctor. As she hugged herself about the waist, Robert looked up to see her quietly sobbing.

  It almost killed him to be so mean to her. But Alex couldn't bring himself to allow her to comfort him. He didn't deserve her sympathy. This was his fault. Laura yelped in pain. Readjusting them in the chair, he found a position that seemed to be better for her.

  "Here comes the doctor." Stepping aside, Lydia made room for the doctor and Robert to enter. "She's over there." Pointing with an unsteady hand, Lydia showed the doctor to Laura and Alex.

  Doc Adams, an older gentleman who'd delivered most of the children in the town, spoke in a deep soothing voice, "Let's move her into one of the bedrooms."

  Doing as he was told, Alexander went through the first doorway off the hall. He gently laid his daughter's broken body down on the bed her parents once shared.

  "Papa, don't leave me," she wailed.

  Keeping her good hand tucked safely inside his, Alex sat on the edge of the bed. "I'm right here. Papa's not going anywhere. I'm going to stay by your side as long as you need me."

  "I want my mama." Her plaintive cry shattered his heart, gripping his soul in so much sorrow that he felt the pain sear through him as if it were cutting him in half.

  Focusing all of his strength on Laura, he struggled to find the right words. "I'm here. Papa's here."

  Hastily the doctor cut away the sleeve of her dress exposing the broken arm. Sucking in his breath at the sight of it, Alex wanted to be sick. How could a bone twist in such a manner? Oh, the pain his brave little girl must be enduring. Once again he was awash with the need to make that pain his.

  "Alexander, I need to set this arm," the doctor said as he pushed the wire rimmed glasses up the bridge of his nose, and laid a gentle hand on Alex's shoulder.

  "Is it going to be painful for her?" Alex knew the question was ridiculous, and still he couldn't help asking it.

  After rolling up his shirt sleeves about his elbows, the doctor opened his black bag. He pulled out a brown bottle and tipped some of the liquid onto a piece of white cloth. "I'll sedate her first. I can try to make this as painless as possible, but I'm not going to sugar-coat this, she is going to feel what I'm about to do."

  Sickened by the thought, Alex gulped in deep breaths. "All right." Reaching out, he brushed some locks of blonde hair off Laura's dampened brow. "The doctor's going to get you all fixed up."

  Placing the white cloth over her mouth and nose he ordered her to breathe deeply. Doing as she was told, within a few minutes her eyes drifted shut. Alex watched as she relaxed her grip on his hand.

  With a quick nod of his head, the doctor set her arm. Laura gave a sharp yelp when the bone snapped in place. Alexander felt as if the room were spinning, the doctor's face blurred before his eyes. A strange buzzing sound came to him.

  He forced himself to take deep, even breaths until the sensation passed. He watched forlornly while the doctor splinted the arm and made a sling for it.

  When that was finished, he turned to Alex, saying, "She'll be more comfortable if we can get her out of the dress and into her nightgown. The medicine I gave her will wear off in about an hour, and then you can give her the painkiller I'll leave here."

  Barely able to absorb what the man was saying, Alexander nodded. Then, rising from the bed he helped get Laura changed. Tucking the blankets around her still form, he placed a pillow under her arm as instructed.

  "It's important to keep the arm elevated for the next week or so. No activity whatsoever. Visitors will do her some good after a day or two. Right now she needs bed rest and to remain quiet." Leaving a paper with instructions on the nightstand, the doctor snapped his bag shut.

  Pausing in the doorway he said to Alex, "I'll be back in the morning to check on her. If you need anything at all send Robert or Miss Lydia to fetch me."

  Focusing on his daughter, he wasn't even aware when the man left the house. Leaving her bedside, Alex pulled a wicker rocking chair beside the bed. Sitting down, he caught sight of the picture of Joanna. Reaching for the silver frame, he hugged it to his chest.

  How could he have thought he was ready to fall in love again? If he hadn't been late yet again none of this would have happened. He didn't deserve to be loved by any woman.

  Gently he rocked back and forth, while life went on around them. From the kitchen came the sounds of dishes being washed and put away. He heard Robert talking to someone, probably Mrs. Sutherland. Crickets and tree frogs chirped and croaked, making familiar nighttime noises.

  Sometime in the last few hours, darkness had fallen and Alex hadn't even noticed. Rising, he took the globe off the lantern on the nightstand. He was going to light the wick, but couldn't find a match and flint.

  Making sure that Laura was comfortable first, he left the room going to the kitchen and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Lydia sitting at the table with Robert. He had thought she had left. Instead, he found himself looking at what could have been any other normal nighttime ritual.

  Robert had his head bent over some papers while Lydia sipped tea from a cup. The only problem was, this wasn't another normal night in the Judson household.

  "Robert, you should be in bed."

  Surprised by the sound of his father's voice, Robert raised his head. "I was just working on some schoolwork with Miss Lydia."

  "It's late. Go to bed," Alex ordered.

  "Yes, sir." He pushed the papers into a pile and did as he was told.

  Rising from her seat, Lydia went to the stove and poured a cup of coffee. Turning she held the thick white mug out to him.

  He took the cup because she offered it. Going through the motions, he sipped the strong brew. Frustration at not being able to help his daughter broiled inside of him.

  Laying a hand on his sleeve, she spoke. "There's no need to be so hard on him, Alexander. He's worried about his sister."

  "I know that." Turning on her, he pulled free from her grasp. "I thought you'd gone home." He spoke in a halting voice.

  She looked stunned by his comment. Seeing the hurt look in her eyes, Alexander forced himself not to care.

  "I was about to help Robert get ready for bed."

  "It's been a long day for all of us. Go home, Lydia."

  "If this is really what you want me to do, then I'll leave."

  "It is."

  She stared to reach out to him and he backed away, imploring her, "Lydia, please, I'm begging you, go now." The uncertainty lingered in the expression on her face. He almost gave into the temptation to take her in his arms, to hold her
close, taking whatever comfort he could find.

  He couldn't do any of those things because he couldn't bear to let her see his shame.

  Still standing before him, she tried to explain what had happened to Laura. "I'm sorry, Alex. I should have been taking better care of her, but I swear to you what happened was an accident."

  He could have argued the point with her, telling her that children sometimes moved quicker than lightening, that it was hard to keep track of them all the time. But he took the coward's way out; it was easier than admitting his own guilt to her.

  "You're right. You should have been paying closer attention to her."

  "Alex." She spoke his name on a whisper. "Please, let me stay and make this right."

  Shaking his head, he walked to the door and opened it waiting for her to leave. Clenching his hands by his side, he watched her walk away, delivering the final blow sure to keep her away from him. "I want you to find another job."

  Her steps faltered when she heard him, but Lydia didn't stop, or turn around to confront him. She just kept walking away.

  What had started out as a day of hope and anticipation had turned into the worst day of her life. And now that she no longer needed to put up a brave front, Lydia gave into the tears she'd been fighting to hold back.

  Sobbing, she ran from his house and didn't stop running until she was inside of Aunt Margaret's home. Covering her hand over her mouth to stifle the sobs she stood in the great hallway crying her heart out.

  "Oh my gosh, Lydia! Lydia what's happened?" Maggie hurried down the stairs and quickly taking things from her, led her into the back parlor. "Hush, now. Nothing can be this bad."

  Gulping in breaths of air, Lydia couldn't calm herself. Hysterical, she flung herself face down on the chintz-covered sofa. Her wails echoed off the walls and brought Aunt Margaret and Anna scurrying into the room to see what the commotion was about.