Behind The Curve-The Farm | Book 2 | The Farm

by Craven III, Boyd

  “Really? With dinner?” he said, sliding backwards.

  “As long as your mom doesn’t mind,” Goldie said, realizing she was treading thin ice.

  “What kind of Coke?” Angel asked.

  “Can I get a glass of Sprite?” Harry asked. “With some ice please?”

  Angelica nodded and Rob let out a sigh of relief.

  “Chinese fire drill,” Anna called suddenly.

  The grownups grabbed their drinks and started running around the table like it was duck duck goose and then dropped back in their same spots, more or less. Now Rob was sitting by Angelica and the spots for Kerry and Sherry were to his right. Angelica was not surprised to see Sherry hesitate, then take the seat next to Rob. Angel hid her growl from everybody but Rob. He put his hand on her leg under the table and she suddenly stopped.

  “That’s funny,” Kerry said. “You guys practice that?”

  “Um… when you’ve been sick and then on quarantine more than once… the walls start to close in fast,” Andrea told her.

  “No kidding! If I hadn't had the market, I would have gone crazy myself. When do the casts come off?”

  “This week,” Andrea said.

  “Another month,” both Dante and Leah chorused together.

  “Wait, you said, if you hadn't had the market. Past tense,” Anna said, making everybody look from her to Kerry.

  Kerry let out a long sigh. “Yeah, there have been some problems there. The USDA’s FSIS agents? They… I’m sorry, this really might be a long story.”

  Goldie had been making plates up for Harry and her, but she turned to Kerry and said, “Baby sis, if you don’t just spit it out, I’m going to use the spoon on your ass next.”

  Angelica snickered, one of the only ones in the family who could get away with laughing at Goldie. They had a mutual fear of each other.

  “So has anybody around here heard what’s been going on at local farms and farmers’ markets lately? Or been to a bigger chain grocery store?”

  “I heard grocery stores were having stocking issues. Disruptions from the riots and stuff?” Rob asked her while getting some chicken out of the basket and passing it on.

  “It’s worse than that. About a month ago, the USDA came in and said that we were going to have to start putting limits on how much people could buy there—”

  “Yeah, I heard about that, but that was right about when Anna had problems when we were mostly gone,” Leah said.

  “Exactly. Well, this past week, they came in and started enforcing it. At the end of the day, they confiscated whatever everybody had left over and gave them a voucher.”

  “A voucher?” Leah asked, confused.

  “Yup, to be filled out and mailed in. They said if you’re lucky, you’ll get a check in sixty days or so.”

  “No way,” Angelica piped up. “That’ll put most of them out of business.”

  “Yes way, and then they came back in on Thursday and did the same. Friday, they came in and just took everything. Saturday, there was no market,” Kerry said quietly. “Then, over the weekend, agents started harassing the farmers, confiscating animals, produce, and feed where they could. Not everybody cooperated, and many vendors suddenly lost everything they had.”

  “They tried to do that here,” Rob said. “They better hope they don’t try that again.”

  “Easy Rob,” Sherry said, getting the basket of chicken and picking out two smaller pieces for herself. “Don’t say something I have to do something about. I’m on your side here guys, and so are most of the officers, even the ones Anna scared the shit out of.”

  “That was Ed Buckley,” Anna piped up, “but we had another near hairy incident when they wanted to arrest Leah.”

  “That’s right,” Sherry said tapping her finger against her lips. “Got the two confused… anyways, despite the fact that you all have had some very ugly run ins with police, the Mallorys included, please remember I’m still an officer and I have to uphold the laws. Just keep your patch of wacky tobacky to yourself, Goldie.”

  “What?” Luis almost fell off his stool.

  “She’s kidding,” Goldie told him with a smile.

  “No, I’m not,” Sherry mouthed to Luis, who started laughing. “Ok, maybe I am.”

  “Anyways,” Kerry said, going on, “apparently the USDA’s enforcement arm is heavily involved. Apparently, the guys that are working out this way aren’t allowed to just come onto private property anymore.”

  “Wait,” Curt said, “if they’re raiding farms, they’re coming onto private property.”

  “I meant the teams that are cleaning out the markets and grocery stores,” Kerry said. “I know it’s confusing… but there’s another set of teams, who Sherry and I think are mostly FSIS agents, mixed in with some DHS boys, that are doing the confiscations.”

  “Folks need to stand up for themselves,” Dante said.

  “What they need is another Big Red,” Leah told him.

  “Ok, hold on, everybody got food?” Rob asked.

  Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked down at their plates, then nodded.

  “Harry, will you say grace for us?”

  They held hands, making a circle all the way around the table, including the bar that sat right behind it.

  “Dear Jesus. Please bless my Great Aunt Kerry. Someday when I’m as old as her I wish to be as happy looking as she is,” snickers from around the table, “and please bless our friend. Miss… Officer Lady. She’s good, otherwise my Momma would have scratched her eyes out for sitting next to Daddy,” small gasps, “and please bless those plants grandma was taking care of in the corn field. I didn’t know Columbian pine trees had more than one name. Amen.”

  Twenty-Five

  The copy of the papers that had been taken off of Sullivan’s corpse was brought out. The group finished supper and started on drinks. Harry was getting sleepy, so everyone but Luis and Goldie went out to the big workshop. They piled onto three sets of picnic tables that they had pulled away from the north wall and got some beers out. Sherry had had to leave earlier on a call, but the rest of them were discussing what was going on.

  “So, if the grocery stores are running out of food, why aren’t we seeing this on the TV?” Anna asked, getting pretty lit on her fourth drink.

  “Yeah, that doesn’t make sense to me. Today’s the first time we’ve really seen an escalation,” Steven pointed out.

  “Media suppression,” Dante told them. “You saw how they painted the narrative with Andrea until she got them by the short and curlies.”

  “Yes, that was especially awesome how you handled that,” Kerry said. “There was talk even out here on the news that the prosecutors were trying to get all the video clips taken down, but they kept popping back up.”

  “That’s because Andrea put them on one of those torrent file sharing sites. Every time YouTube or SuckBook took it down, it would drive more and more folks to find the torrent. Besides, we’d already sent the videos to every major news media outlet in the country,” Curt told them, holding onto his beer tightly.

  “Easy bro, we aren’t going to be taking your brew away from you,” Steven taunted.

  “Sorry, I figure if I hold onto it, I won’t put it down and get a fresh one.”

  “We have like 47 cases in the cooler side,” Leah said.

  “Holy shit,” Kerry said with a small shock.

  “Oh um…” Leah said, realizing what she had just let slip.

  “I don’t care,” Steven told them. “Group vote?”

  “How about, anybody have any concerns?” Andrea asked.

  No one spoke up.

  “Should we show her?” Anna asked.

  “Yeah, I think Little Rob and Angel should do it though,” Leah said, “Makes us seem less crazy.”

  Angelica and Rob took Kerry to the back room where the roll up door was. When they were inside of it, they closed it again, with Kerry looking quite confused.

  “So, the real reason you wan
ted to show her. Blurt it out.”

  “New ally.”

  “Friendly.”

  “Rob’s family.”

  “Give us time to talk.”

  The last one was from Curt, making them turn to look at him. “But first, I need a beer. Who wants one?”

  As it turned out, almost everyone did. Curt broke his rule about how many beers he wanted to drink, and got them out. That was when he noticed that Leah had not been drinking, she’d been sipping on an iced tea.

  “I forgot, sorry,” he told her.

  “That’s ok. Hopefully in seven or eight months I can join you all again,” she said suddenly.

  “So, what did you want to talk about?” Anna asked, feeling a conspiracy in the air.

  “She came to ask us something, but I don’t know what,” Andrea said, using the side of the picnic table to pop her top.

  “Yeah, that’s the impression I got too,” Dante turned to her, “but I think Sherry getting a call kind of threw her game off.”

  “That’s what I thought too,” Steven agreed. “I wonder if they’re going to ask us to help protect other farms? Some shit like that.”

  “Or the farms are starting a coalition for mutual protection?” Andrea piped up.

  Anna looked at her, then took a big swig. “What about the people who aren’t farmers? Where are they getting their groceries?”

  “What do you mean?” Steven asked.

  “Well, I mean there’s a lot more of them then there are farmers. How are they getting food, and why aren’t we hearing about this? The gold and silver run in Fort Smith didn’t make it seem any crazier than a city normally is, and we didn’t see the riots and burning like we just saw on TV tonight.”

  “Yeah, I think that whole trickle effect of the food system getting disrupted is probably starting to happen. Like back in March when nobody could find toilet paper.”

  “Muahahaha, don’t squeeze ‘da Charmin!” Anna bellowed.

  “Oh shit, you’re cut off,” Steven chuckled.

  Anna responded to that by banging the bottom of her bottle on the top of his, making his beer geyser straight up. Steven tried to jump back, cursing, but his legs were on the inside of the bench and he fell over backwards. Anna, still laughing, stepped neatly out of the way and grabbed his beer on the way down.

  “You’re getting the tickle torture tonight for that,” Steven said, getting up, and brushing the droplets of beer off his clothing that hadn’t soaked in yet.

  “Oh really?” she asked, deliberately drinking his beer.

  “This is going to turn pornographic, isn’t it?” Dante asked.

  “I think so,” Leah told him. “I don’t know if we should film this, or run away before we’re shocked into a PTSD coma.”

  “I’m not the only one who gives tickle torture?” a surprised Curt asked.

  “No,” the other guys shouted back.

  The lift started coming back up, and everybody got silent while Steven whispered threats at Anna, who was just blowing him kisses. Even though they were all in their forties, they still horsed around, loved, and played as if they were decades younger. It was something they all had in common over the long years together.

  “Holy shit,” Kerry said simply as they came in and sat down, “Can I…?” she motioned to the beer cooler.

  “Sure,” Curt said. “So what do you think?”

  “That you guys… I don’t know how to even… That’s a lot of… holy shit!”

  “No, I meant, why do you think we showed you that?” Steven asked.

  “Probably to let me know you folks weren’t worried and you didn’t want me to worry about my big sis and the rest of you,” she said.

  “Naw, we wanted time to talk, but I guess that might have been part of it,” Dante said, the least drunk of all of them, with the exception of Leah.

  “So, what did you come here to ask us? Spill it,” Leah told her.

  “I… holy shit. Ok, give me a second,” she said getting the top off her beer and taking a big swallow. “Do you guys know how many people are about to go without food, just in this area alone?” she asked.

  “Most,” Anna said with a shrug. “Anybody who isn’t a prepper, homesteader, or farmer. We’re kind of new to the farming game ourselves.”

  “Yeah…” Kerry said looking at her, “but they would buy food if they could, right?”

  “When things get bad? I’ve read people will do almost anything for their kids to keep them fed.”

  “Exactly. Good acts, evil acts. Who knows? Unless directed and shaped, most of the time it goes bad. That’s why I have an idea here. You guys are under no obligation, but if what I’ve seen and heard is true, we might have a good chance of saving this area a lot of grief if things get as bad as I’ve heard they are getting.”

  “Just spit it out already,” Curt whined.

  “I was hoping you guys would let us have the market here, between the front gate and the second gate.”

  “Set up on each side of the driveway?” Steven asked.

  “Yeah, let vehicles in for setup, but make everyone park on the road and walk in. Only let folks in in a single file. Make it a ‘club’, so it can’t be considered a public event. It’s by membership only and on private property. It’ll make almost all of the USDA boys’ plans extinct.”

  “You mean it’ll fuck up their plans?” Leah asked her.

  “Yeah, that’s it,” Kerry said. “Sorry, beer’s hitting me harder than I thought, and how many damned cows and pigs do you have hanging down there?”

  “A few,” Andrea told her. “We had to cull some, and with no place to sell it, we’re canning it as we can find jars. In the meantime, we have a big freezer.”

  “And an entire underground warehouse complex that’s bigger than any of the commercial buildings in town.”

  “That’s just the basements and shit,” Anna said, hiccupping. “You should see the caves.”

  “The. Caves. Really?” Kerry looked shocked.

  Angelica nodded like a bobble head, making Anna and Rob burst into laughter.

  “The whole murder mystery thing. Like catching Steff out here a couple of times, the bones in the caves that were found…”

  “Rumors of buried treasure,” Curt supplied.

  “Treasure maps,” Andrea said, polishing off her third beer.

  “Arrrg. Shiver me timbers,” Angelica added.

  “If I hadn’t just seen what I just saw, I’d think you’re all batshit crazy.” Kerry said soberly.

  “Yeah, but we’re drunk. So, let’s party!” Anna yelled.

  Kerry’s head hurt. She had not gotten drunk in a long time, and now she remembered why she gave up drinking. Groaning, she looked at the other side of the strange bed, hoping it was empty… and it was. Then she remembered. Her nephew had helped her upstairs to the spare guest bedroom. She groaned as she got out of bed, then looked in shock at herself. She had been stripped at some point. That’s when she saw the small pile near the dresser.

  Her clothes had been laundered. There were two bottles of water sitting on top of them, with half a dozen aspirin folded up inside of a note. Kerry grinned and read the note as she got dressed.

  The problem with you being the miracle baby, is I am so damned old I can’t do that kind of fun any more. I want to hear all about it when you wake up. I got your clothes washed and dried before I headed off to bed myself. I left you some aspirin and water for the hangover I know you are going to have. I will make you up my hangover breakfast special. - Goldie

  She grinned, wincing as the movement made her head ache. She took about half of the aspirin and washed them down with half a bottle of water. She needed to find a restroom and then she would apologize profusely and beg for coffee. Not necessarily in that order.

  “How are you feeling, babe?” Angelica asked, poking Rob in the side.

  “Not bad, all things considered,” he admitted. “You?”

  “I didn’t get as bad as Anna did, but I’ve
got a little bit of a hangover going.”

  “Well, we can’t be in bed all day. Still have animals to feed and I have to start the fall harvest. The hay should be ready to cut and the weather forecast shows no rain until after the weekend, so I can get that baled up.”

  “Ugggggg. Ok, oh shhh…. I think I can hear your aunt.”

  “Yeah,” Rob said with a grin, “she might have been the worst off. She can’t hold her liquor any more.”

  “Wasn’t it crazy, when you were younger, going to the bar with your aunt?”

  “Not really,” Rob told her, “she’s not that much older than us. Miracle Baby, Grandma and Grandpa called her. They thought their baby days were done, and then bam. Not done.”

  “Speaking of babies, did you and her talk about something I should know about?” Angelica asked, tracing a fingernail down his back.

  “When she asked for more nieces and nephews?”

  “Yeah,” she said softly.

  “No, but I think everybody but Ma has baby fever around here.”

  “Uh huh,” she said softly, trying to get more of a reaction out of him.

  “Baby, I really have to get going on these chores,” he said, not quite whining.

  “You might call me Angel, but the Devil’s making me do it,” she said, biting her lip.

  “Dammit Boyd,” Rob muttered.

  Twenty-Six

  The group talked about Kerry’s proposal. The market had been closed for a week now, with the USDA having visited most of the vendors there at least once. They still had a hard time believing it. Angelica and Anna had decided to go into the bigger town in Booneville and, walking into the grocery store, they were surprised. People were wearing masks like they were, but the fresh produce section was almost empty. Even of the things people did not buy a lot of, like odd root vegetables. What surprised all of them was that the fruit section was stripped as well.

  The farm had a few odd apple trees, so they had never had to buy them since they had started producing. In the store it was bare. The ladies took their carts to the dry goods section and saw that, not only that, but the canned foods areas were almost empty too. Even though they didn’t really need it, Angelica grabbed a twenty-five-pound bag of rice and put it in her cart. Anna grabbed some diced tomatoes that had chiles in them, then a few bags of masa flour.