Regrets & Revenge (Foster Family Book 2)

by Zavi James

  “Then tell me why you left!”

  I clamped my mouth shut so tight that my jaw ached from the effort. There were moments, in the dead of night when the heartburn made it so I couldn’t sleep, when I wondered what would happen if I told them the truth. What would happen if I told them everything I knew? Those thoughts were usually chased away by the more sinister visions of Dad’s body. It was more than enough that I had put my own life in danger by accidentally uncovering Xavier’s secret.

  “Mia,” Dante pleaded, clasping his hands together in front of him as if in prayer. “I can help you if you let me in. Was it to do with Hector?” The mention of my Dad’s name caused a painful lump to materialise in my throat. “I’ll help you find who killed him, boss. We can set things right; I swear to you.”

  A mirthless laugh escaped from my lips. “You can’t help me with that.”

  He blinked a few times before he shook his head. “Of course, we can. We have enough connections. It shouldn’t take us long to figure it out.”

  There wasn’t a problem they didn’t think they could solve. Enough money and enough arms that the world should fall into line as and when they demanded it. “And what happens when you find out it’s someone you can’t go up against?” I asked, wanting to knock the confidence out of him.

  “What? What do you mean?”

  “Nothing,” I said, pushing myself to standing and walking into the kitchen. “Coffee?”

  “Mia,” Dante said, and I could hear him get up from his seat. “What did you mean if it’s someone I can’t go up against?”

  “Do you still take it with three sugars?” I asked, busying myself with setting the mugs out on the counter as I realized my mistake. My cupboards held the bare minimum. I had tried to stay as frugal as possible on Carmen’s generosity and my dwindling savings.

  “Mia.” It was more forceful this time and when I turned around, Dante had left very little space between us. In the time I had known him, Dante was carefree and childlike. He was Luc’s opposite in every sense of the word, but the Dante that stood before me was pure business. There was no laughter held in his eyes, no teasing tone laced in his words. “Do you know who killed Hector?”

  I could feel it: the undeniable desire to share the secret that I’d carried for so long. The man who I had taken as my brother, who had looked after me from the moment I stepped into this world, was standing before me asking a question, and all I wanted to do was tell him the truth. “It’s not important.” But the words came out strangled, and I had to lean back against the counter, palms planted on the worktop, to keep myself steady on my feet. Gio, who had followed us and stood in the doorway, watched me with eagle eyes.

  “Bullshit,” Dante said, narrowing his eyes. “Utter bullshit, Mia. You loved your Dad. You were devastated when he died. Who are you trying to protect?”

  “Myself,” I told him desperately, cracks appearing thick and fast in my defenses. “Everyone.”

  “I don’t understand.” Creases puckered Dante’s brow, aging him, as he tried to figure out what I meant. I had to resist the urge to reach out and straighten them. They didn’t belong there. I wanted to apologize for all the chaos I had left in my wake. I should have just done my time and walked away like we had all originally planned, and then maybe none of this would be happening.

  And then, all of a sudden, I saw the realization dawn on Dante’s face. There was a weird sensation that churned in my stomach and I was uncertain whether it was fear, relief or an uncomfortable combination of both. Like, if Dante had guessed my secret it was some sort of loophole and it would be less damaging than if I had told him myself, when the reality was, he would be in just as much danger if he made an educated guess.

  Whatever the feeling was, it seemed to be displayed across Dante’s features as he said, “Xavier? You think Xavier had your father killed?”

  Chapter Six

  Dante

  “Why would Xavier kill your father?” I asked her. From what Mia had inferred, the suspect was narrowed down to two candidates. Either Luc had lost his shit before she had even left us, or Xavier had taken a dislike to Hector that none of us had been aware of. The former was highly unlikely. Luc had let a lot of things slide where Hector was concerned, all for the sake of keeping Mia happy, and so that left Xavier in the spotlight.

  Mia paled a few shades and gripped the counter behind her again, giving me enough confirmation that I’d solved the puzzle.

  “Hulk,” I said, looking to Gio. He narrowed his eyes at me, unimpressed by his newest moniker. Gio had never quite earned the same respect as the rest of us. “Grab a glass of water and bring it through.” I turned my attention to Mia. “Come on, Momma. Let’s get you sitting down before you pass out on me.”

  She allowed me to help her away from the counter and back into the living room. Once Mia was settled on the sofa, she tipped her head back and took in a few deep breaths. Gio appeared with the glass of water, accepted by a grateful Mia who sipped from it. When the color returned to her face and her breathing was under control, I tried again. Crouched on the floor between her legs, I asked, “Why would Xavier kill your father?”

  Mia swallowed before answering me quietly, “That’s what I can’t tell you.”

  “Why not?”

  “What if the same thing happens to you?”

  “It won’t,” I assured her gently, with no guarantee. My relationship with Xavier was complicated, and I’m sure he topped the list of people that would happily put me in the ground. “What did Hector do?” I attempted to keep my voice steady and calm. This was a situation that needed to be handled with diplomatic delicacy. Not something that I was known for, but the alternative was to demand answers and watch her close off again.

  “Dad didn’t do anything,” Mia snapped quickly, defending her late father fiercely. The fire died as quick as it had come, and she dropped her head into her hands. “It was all my fault.” That was not a sentence I had expected to fall from her mouth. What dealings had Mia had with Xavier? Luc and I had done everything possible to minimize Mia’s interactions with anyone outside immediate family.

  I shifted my weight from my haunches so that I knelt down in front of her. Reaching out, I hesitated when I saw the bracelet Luc had gifted her still clasped around her wrist. Another physical glimmer of hope that Mia hadn’t severed every tie with my brother. Taking her wrists in my hands, I gently pried hers away from her face. “What was your fault, Mia? You barely spoke to Xavier.”

  “I overheard a conversation I shouldn’t have,” she whispered. Her voice shook with the words, but no tears fell. I thought that would be all she gave me, but it was almost as if I could see her cracking in front of my eyes. “He was talking to Maria. I went to visit her, and I heard them. I ran. I tried to lie and tell him I didn’t know anything, but he knew. He threated my Dad, but I didn’t think he’d do anything. I hadn’t told Luc. I planned to but I hadn’t yet. Xavier must have known I wouldn’t hide it from him.”

  The floodgates had opened. As Mia spoke, the pace of her words became quicker until they were tripping over each other in a haste to spill the truth. “I didn’t plan to, but I went to see Maria the next day to get a straight answer from her, and she admitted to it all. I couldn’t keep it from Luc. I was going to marry him, D. I couldn’t have started a life with Luc knowing that lie. She must have told Xavier, because I went to see Dad straight after and… and…” She couldn’t finish the sentence.

  When Mia ran from Luc, she also ran from a sense of closure. The rest of us had stood there in the pouring rain and watched as Hector was committed to the Earth and handed over to our Heavenly Father. It was a sparse funeral, the guest list consisting of all of us that worked for Luc. That was the last thing he had done for her before he’d closed himself off.

  In that moment, I knew I needed to take advantage of Mia’s muddled thought process. She was an open book and I needed to extract the one piece of information that would complete the puzzle. I pushed d
own on the guilt that had started to wind its way up my body. My line of work required me to leave my conscience at the door, and most of the time that wasn’t a problem, but working against Mia for my own gain was a little harder to swallow. “What were you going to tell Luc?” I asked, sliding my grip from her wrists so that I held her hands. She gripped them with surprising force, turning my skin white.

  There was a war raging inside of Mia and for a brief moment I thought I might be on the losing side, but she had already revealed so much, and the weight of carrying the secret had finally broken her. A tear rolled down her cheek as she whispered, “Xavier is Luc’s father.”

  Throughout my life I had seen and done things that would drive most to insanity. Naïvely, I’d believed there was nothing left in this world that could catch me off guard, until Mia spoke those words. “That’s not possible,” I whispered back, the shock seeping through to even my vocal cords.

  “Maria admitted it, Dante,” Mia told me, tears falling freely now. “She’d lied and said Luc was Charlie’s son.”

  I wondered if this was how Pandora felt when she opened the box. Driven by curiosity and the intense desire to find an answer, I’d overlooked the fact that it may be an answer that I hadn’t expected, let alone wanted.

  By the time I had met Luc, Charlie and Maria had already divorced. I had little knowledge about their relationship, aside from the fact that every now and then, fueled by a little alcohol, Charlie would lament the breakdown of his marriage to the love of his life. Growing up, Luc spent less and less time with Maria, who remarried and had Stefan, and fell into step with Charlie. There had always been a small spark of envy in me, watching father and son resemble each other in their temperament. Luc had something that I would never have, but I never wished it away from him.

  I’d been there for the aftermath of Charlie’s death. Borne witness as Luc spiraled out of control without the man who had been his guiding hand in life. This would push him over the edge if he found out. Deep down I knew there was no if about it. Telling Luc the truth would mean he’d lose Charlie all over again, but keeping it from him meant he would lose the woman he loved and their baby.

  “Who else knows?” I asked her, though I felt I already knew the answer.

  “No one,” Mia confirmed, to my relief. “As far as I know, no one. It’s not something he wants as public knowledge.”

  There was no doubt Xavier would want to keep this secret hidden. If word got out, then it would do irreparable damage to his reputation, put a spanner in his marriage, and put further strain on his relationship with the twins. Everything Xavier stood for would be pulled from under his feet, and the delicate balance of our world would be tipped off its axis.

  And maybe that was what we needed, but in a more controlled manner.

  I stood up from the floor and brushed myself off. Luc wasn’t here. There was no one giving me direct orders, which meant that I was flying solo. Where most people in the family craved power, I wanted none of the responsibility that came with it, but there was no alternative. I was about to make a handful of decisions that would probably upset multiple people, including Vittoria, and yet that knowledge didn’t cause my thought process to waver.

  “You’re coming home, Mia.”

  Mia’s head snapped up to look at me and she shook her head. “No. No, I’m not. I’m never going back. I have Xavier and Luc after me. There is no way.”

  “How long do you think you’re going to last?” I asked her, coolly. “You thought that you were well hidden with Carmen, but we found you. A change of name, a change of country… Mia, you’re never going to get rid of us, I can assure you of that. Luc will keep hunting and he’ll find you.” After a moment, I added the words, “And I’ll help him.” I knew my brother better than anyone and he wouldn’t rest until he’d fulfilled this ridiculous desire that had been planted in his soul. “You’ll spend the rest of your life looking over your shoulder. Is that how you want to live?”

  “What’s the alternative, Dante? I walk straight in front of the firing squad?” Mia bit back, getting to her feet.

  I kept my tone level as I told her, “The alternative is that you come back home and tell Luc the truth, and we deal with Xavier as a family.”

  “Walk straight in front of the firing squad…”

  Looking her in the eye, I placed a hand on my chest, just below my heart where a specific piece of ink lay. “I swear to you, on my vow, that I won’t let Luc harm you.”

  Chapter Seven

  Mia

  The moment Dante had guessed was the moment I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I’d spent so long alone with this secret that it felt good to share it with someone else. It lifted the heavy weight that had sat on my chest and made it difficult to breathe. What I hadn’t expected was for him to turn on me and force my hand to come home. Dante and I had always been close, and I’d thought he’d understand my predicament and keep me safe. Instead, I was being told to return home or I’d be hunted down like a fox by hounds. Predator and prey. The roles would never change.

  “Do you trust him, Mia?” Carmen asked, standing there with her arms folded across her chest.

  Dante and Emilio were in the living room; the deep hum of their voices came through to the bedroom as they spoke. Even if the door had been open, I doubt I’d have been able to pick out the exact topic of conversation with the way the blood was pounding in my ears. My heart thumped as if I had just run a marathon, as if it knew the end was near and was making up for the lifetime that would be lost.

  “Mia,” Carmen said forcefully, so that I turned my head to look at her. “Do you trust, Dante?”

  There was a time I wouldn’t have thought twice about this question. I would have told her that Dante was family and I trusted him with my life, and I was sure he’d have said the same. That foundation had been worn away until we were standing precariously on rocky rubble, wondering if we would fall or if we could rebuild. Such a delicate balance with no guarantee which way we would sway.

  “I can come back with you,” Carmen told me when I didn’t answer her.

  I swept the bedroom for any small items I missed when I packed, stuffing them into the bag and zipping it shut. “I’m not sure Emilio would be happy about that.”

  “He isn’t happy with much at the moment,” Carmen muttered, but her husband’s temperament must have deterred her somewhat because she adjusted her offer. “Okay, well, let me send Gio back with you. He’ll make sure nothing happens.”

  From the corner of my eye, I saw the panic flit across Gio’s features, so quick that I wasn’t sure that it had happened. There was something about the way he tailed Carmen and listened to her every order that had me wondering if there was more than duty that bound him to his position. He lingered a little too long, rarely smiling, and when he did, they were only at her words. If Emilio had noticed how attentive his wife’s guard was, he didn’t care. Why would he? Emilio gave Carmen everything she could have asked for, not that she needed to ask anyone for anything.

  “You’ve done enough,” I told her, sitting on the edge of the bed. It sagged under my weight and my muscles grew heavy with fatigue at the temporary comfort. Despite the fact I wanted to take Carmen up on both her offers, I couldn’t. Heading back with them in tow would only elevate tensions beyond what they already were, which meant I had to put my trust in Dante and his promise that he wouldn’t let Luc hurt me. This could prove to be my most expensive mistake if my trust was misplaced.

  Carmen ran a hand through my hair, and I rested my head against her stomach as she stood before me, hugging me to her like a child. Alone with Carmen was often when thoughts of my mother invaded my thoughts. Would she have held me close in a situation like this or would she have been shocked to find that I had gotten myself into such a mess? There was no doubt in my mind that wherever Dad was, he would be looking at me with a sense of satisfaction in knowing he had been right. That my relationship with Luc had been messy and would lead to a sticky end.
And yet, in the recesses of my mind, I knew if I could go back in time I would have still chosen Luc. Still have given into the love that had burned so bright, I bore the scorch marks.

  “Listen to me,” she said, and I felt the press of a kiss on top of my head. “If you need anything at all, I am your first port of call. Don’t worry about Emil.”

  Releasing her from my grip, I nodded. Carmen had equipped me with a phone that housed two contacts: herself and Gio. It had been used sparingly for fear of being caught out. “Thank you for everything, Carmen. I couldn’t have asked for a better friend.” It was strange to think that in a world that was so corrupt, I had found a friendship that was so genuine.

  “Don’t mention it,” she said, helping me stand up from the bed. Simple tasks like this were growing difficult, and I expected them to continue in that direction. Carmen had carried her pregnancy easily, practically glowing, whereas I carried it with much less grace at a considerably smaller size.

  Picking up my bag, I glanced around to make sure there was nothing left. Carmen walked so close that I could feel her feet nipping at my heels as we exited the room. The conversation between Emilio and Dante died the moment we made an appearance.

  “All set?” Dante asked me brightly as if he was collecting me from a weekend away. The business-like manner had seeped away and left his usual ease.

  “If anything happens to her, Atwood,” Carmen said calmly, moving past me to stand in front of him, “I’m going to hold you personally responsible and then I’m going to make your life a living hell.”

  “It’s refreshing that you think it already isn’t a living hell, with what I’ve been dealing with lately,” he shot back at her. “Usually we just threaten to kill each other,” he whispered, as if giving her a handy tip.

  “Death wouldn’t mean anything to you. You’d probably welcome it.”