Rampage (Ruthless Tendencies Series Book 4)

by D. M. Burns

  She stands and kisses my forehead then takes her coffee mug over for a refresher. I move for the door with my OJ in hand contemplating her words.

  “I love you, mom.” I look over my shoulder at the fiery redheaded older version of me and she smiles brightly.

  “I love you more, honey. Before you go up, grab your bookbag off the floor by the back door, okay? I almost flipped over it coming in this morning from work.”

  “Sure… Yeah.” I say. My brows crease with confusion. What?

  Without another word, I move my ass through the hallway toward the back door. I tossed my bookbag in the trashcan last week. It was ruined. Sure enough, when the back door comes into view so does my bookbag. It’s propped against the wall looking brand-new. It’s as if the red spray-painted FIRE CROTCH embroidery incident never happened. Picking it up off the floor, I sling it over my back and hightail my ass up the stairs.

  Once I’m in my room, I set my glass down and fall on my bed. I pull my bookbag over into my lap for further inspection. Rifling through the bag I’m pleased to find it doesn’t house any used condoms. It’s almost as perfect as when my dad gave it to me. Now, if I could have my dad back it’d be epic, but I can’t. And just like Slade said, I’ve got to dust myself off and move past this rabbit hole in life. I just need some time. My Slade… Jesus.

  Sliding my hand over the letters of my name, I unzip the front pocket right below the personalization and find a yellow card with Pretty Girl wrote out in elegant script. It’s from Slade. His handwriting looks like that of a professional calligrapher. Much like him, it’s beautiful.

  Pretty Girl,

  This belongs to you. I know how much this bookbag means to you so, I’m returning it. I’m sorry for all the bullshit I pulled but more than that, I’m sorry about your dad.

  Your dad once told me that you’re incredibly special and that I should be very careful in my footprint. He said all human contact comes in the form of walking in or walking out of someone’s life. Those impressions last a lifetime-forever. They live and breathe with us, good or bad. He went on to tell me that becoming the reason for someone shedding tears instead of creating a charming smile was in his eyes a criminal offense. In a twisted way, I guess that makes me your prisoner.

  My asshole ways have been harsh and one day maybe I can explain all that but for now, just know my only excuse is that I was hurt. I wanted to hurt you back. Anger is a tricky emotion, Len. I just never knew that the end result of upsetting you would have the opposite effect on me. It only magnified everything I felt and not in a rewarding way.

  Walking out of your life on a good note should set things right. If not, just do what I do when the rabbit holes in life try to trip you up. Remember the facts… Remember…

  I saw you first.

  I rescued you first.

  I kissed you first.

  I loved you first.

  Slade

  My heart triples over in a racing rhythm. Every cell in my body urges me to run to his house and beg him to talk to me, but I know it would change nothing. If I go to his house, he’ll only send one of his brothers to the door and we all know how that ends. I still have no clue what I’ve done to hurt him. Slade isn’t going to discuss it either. He’s funny that way.

  Whatever he believes is real for him. Even though he broke under the evil veil to comfort me during a family emergency, the fact still remains that there’s no US moving forward. He’s done with me. Those salty warm tears start trickling down my cheeks again. Damnit. I hate the fact that I’m still shedding tears for Slade Carter. Why won’t he tell me what I’ve done? And why do I even care anymore?

  Slade wrote this letter as his way of saying bye. I know he won’t be returning to school. He’s transferring out with the rest of the Four Horsemen of Chaos.

  I have no other choice but to let him go. No matter what though he’ll always be my first kiss. My first boyfriend. My first love. Above all that, he’ll always be my Slade.

  chapter 25 - rampage

  My brain is trying to process her words but even I’m having a hard time with that shit. She has to go… No, the fuck she doesn’t. No, the fuck she’s not. She’s staying right here with me. I mean yeah, I knew this reaction was a possibility. Fuck.

  Being truthful with her about my gangster affiliations and dealings is vital to moving forward but selfishly, I had hoped that I had fucked my way into her heart by now. Yeah, I’m that guy. I’m not above using my yeti dick to get what I want, which happens to be her. Old habits are hard to break sometimes.

  Scrubbing my hand over my jaw again, I shake my head slowly no. I’m trying to filter through my words instead of just spitting anything out at her. Lena can be a handful at times. If I’m not careful she’ll bury a knee in my nut sack. I need those balls in full working capacity down the road. Hopefully to impregnate her with and start a family. That shits going to happen.

  Over the past couple of weeks, I’ve grown fond of her presence. Here at Aces Down. In the penthouse. In my bed. It’s like we picked up where we left off at those railroad tracks all those years ago. You’d think it’d frighten me but no. I look at her as my Aces Down queen. It feels right. Oddly, it’s like she’s the something that’s been missing all along. Her smart-ass comments and late-night sighs are pleasure-seeking highlights that I look forward to now. I want her here. By my side.

  That explosion was only a bullshit excuse to have her here but damn, it was a legitimate one. Since I have yet to put this shit together and pinpoint the sadistic fucks whereabouts that’s responsible, it’s not safe for her to leave. If I have my way, Lena will stay right here with me even after all this craziness is dealt with. So, this bullshit she’s spewing about leaving isn’t going to work for me.

  After a long discussion with the New York Don, he was less than thrilled to find out that someone put a hit on my family. Sadly, Krugger wasn’t shocked by this behavior. That’s because this lifestyle of evil fuckery surrounds the underground around the clock 24/7. For the first time in all my years of dealing with Krugger, I now understand his faceless attitude in this game. Like I said before, it’s a genius approach to this way of life. You can’t kill someone if you don’t know who you’re looking for.

  My call to the mafia’s roundtable of leaders was heard and we're having a sit down soon. Not that I need one. My decision is made. They knew this was coming. It was only a matter of time. Plus, their need for me outweighs my need for them especially when my family’s house goes up in flames.

  Krugger’s voice was deadly calm. The guy has never been seen but when he speaks everyone is quick to listen. The Chicago crime boss, Lucas Merinettie, let his silence speak volumes as well. He was probably calculating the income in his head that losing Aces Down as well as my expertise would cost the family. He’s a numbers guy like me.

  By the end of our conversation, several things were confirmed. The most prevalent being that I wanted out. I’m sure that this was not well-received news but it’s happening whether they like it or not.

  Everything I’m doing is so my family will have a safe future but that’s not all. I want a life with this woman without the fear of god damn explosions or death lurking around every corner. The only explosions I want are from mind-blowing orgasms. Other than that, I want a peaceful existence with her.

  “Pretty girl, that’s not happening.” I tighten my grip around her body and rub my nose along her cheek continuing down the base of her neck where I press a kiss over her erratic pulse. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before but I’m not a big sharer of personal information. But you’ve become a personal requirement for me. Please tell me this doesn’t change things for us. Are you mad?”

  “Shocked, yes. Mad, no. Scared for you, most definitely.” Her eyes are bouncing between mine. I can see the urgency in them. “That type of organization doesn’t take kindly to anyone leaving the inner ranks. You know that Slade. It’s usually never heard of for a reason.”

  Yes, I know that, Nor
mally, in order to walk away from the underground, you actually have to be literally underground but I’m different. However, what’s pinging around in my mind is Lena seems to be well educated in the mafia family lifestyle. Something that doesn’t quite sit right with me. She shouldn’t be familiar with that world at all. That’s a sloppy slip on her part.

  “You seem well versed in the history and knowledge of gangsters. How do you know that baby?” I ask. She lets her head roll around in the pillow and she stares at me in what I know to be her assessing expression.

  “Umh, well… I mean, you know.” She looks to the side then brings those eyes back to me. “I’ve heard that’s how it goes. I’m just worried, that’s all.”

  “Don’t, yeah?” I’ve got to say that Lena has always been a shit liar when it comes to me. And right now, my pretty girl is lying her ass off, AGAIN. She might play a good role for others but not me.

  “That’s impossible. How do you know for sure that they’re okay with you separating yourself from the syndicate? I mean, I uhmm… Shit, Slade. They could come after you.”

  “Shhh, baby. Listen to me… For the most part, those guys are about bank. I provide that without any effort. They won’t do anything to fuck that steady stream of green up. Let me worry with that, yeah?” Her beautiful blue eyes tell me she’s not convinced but she nods anyway.

  “Uhm Slade, I uhm… This thing is, well…” She clears her throat then continues, “Shit this is hard.” She looks off to the side and I glide those sky-blue eyes back to me.

  “What is it, pretty girl?” I ask.

  “Well, this is moving a little too fast for me. I think that it’d be best if I went back to my apartment.” She whispers.

  Okay, I wasn’t expecting that. Hey God… You up there? Is this your version of Karma for all the ladies I fucked and ducked out on? Is this your way of kicking me in the yeti dick with that golden boot of yours? If so, nice aim.

  “Baby don’t do that shit.” My jaw flexes and I try to train my features. “Len, I’m rearranging things. All of this will be a distant memory soon. Don’t let that be an issue.” She looks to the side and my anger is rising. It feels like a multi-million-dollar deal is slipping through my fingertips.

  “It’s just a lot to take in. This place… Your title… Your dealings. Uhm, I just need a little bit of time to absorb it all.” Her voice cracks but so does my heart. After all these years of training myself to feel nothing, leave it to this one to come back, and trigger everything. A painful jolt felt in the center of my chest.

  “Lena, I’m not sure if you’re playing with me or not but babe… Shit, Len.” I back up off her and clear the bed. She grabs the sheet wrapping it around her beautiful body. That move alone has me grinding my teeth together. When she slides off the bed, she ties the sheet into a decorative knot around her chest.

  “Rampage, I’m sorry. I just needed a little space.” I cut her off.

  “FUCK… Are you kidding me right now? And drop that Rampage bullshit because we both know if I’m anything at all to you, I’m Slade.” Her face drops and so does those eyes. She’s staring at my thousand-dollar satin sheet draped around her frame. “You know what, I invented that space bullshit you’re talking about.”

  “I’m just really overwhelmed with the remodel and well… Uhm… I didn’t expect this.” She whispers. I run my hand through my hair and move around the bed to where she is.

  “To hell with Aces interior bullshit, Len. I have no problem closing that project down if that puts you in a better headspace.” I slide my hands up and down her arms. Her eyes bounce up and flare out at me. Those butane flames are burning brightly. Did I say something wrong?

  “If you close it down there’s really no reason for me to be here, Rampage.” The fuck? Yes, there is-me. I’m your reason. She looks down to the floor and whispers, “I love my job but if you don’t want me here then I’ll understand. Just please tell me now so I can start searching for a replacement job.” It’s not lost on me that she called me Rampage again. Shit.

  “I didn’t mean it like that, baby.” How the fuck did this shit get turned around on me? That billionaire business bastard living inside of me is getting aggravated with this shit quick. “How about you tell me what you need from me because right now, no matter what I say, it seems like I’m fucking up.”

  “Jesus. Maybe we just both need a little distance.” She crosses her arms over her chest, but those eyes are fixated on the floor.

  “Right.” I chuckle with zero humor. “I tell you my secrets and you want to run… Is that how this works? What about you Len? You got any secrets baby?”

  There’s more playing out here. She’s not making eye contact and when she does, I see the damage beyond those blue borders. It’s like what she’s doing is physically hurting her. I just don’t understand her reasoning behind it.

  “Len, I’ve gotta be honest. This shit that you're pulling right is lost on me. I can tell that this is the last thing you want to do but right now I’m too fucking pissed to try and talk you down.” I walk to the door and turn back to her before stepping out. Her hands are nervously fiddling with the toga bedsheet.

  “That ache I felt all those years ago wasn’t shit compared to right now. This is not a slash to the soul baby or a clean-cut, no. This feels like you just carved my heart out of my chest. And this right here is why I don’t do relationships outside of fucking.”

  I think I hear her sob, but I don’t stick around for confirmation. If I don’t get the fuck out of this room and away from her, I’m sure I’ll lose my calculated cool.

  Aggressive Anger Boiling Over.

  My Calculated Composure Turning Chaos.

  Engulfing My Future In Fiery Flames.

  chapter 26 - Lena

  As I look down at my bags on the floor in front of me, I swipe at the hot tears leaking out of my eyes. Slade was so hurt at me and rightfully so. But there are things that I’ve got to handle, and I couldn’t do that with him hovering over me.

  First and foremost, I need to make sure that he’s not a target in this investigation. Even though, I have a bad feeling that this is why I was thrown into the mix. Never in my life have I broken the rules, but Slade has never been a part of the equation. That changes everything for me.

  My apartment is quiet and lonely. I haven’t been here in weeks. Truthfully, I missed my little comfy nook in the world but up until now, that wasn’t enough to make me leave my pretend fantasy life that I’d been living in with Slade. That Aces Down reality show is a real-life drama series playing out in my head much like Below Deck, less the sexual frustration. Give me a couple of weeks though because I completely screwed my own self right out of those steady yeti dickings. Shit…

  Slade is a part of the syndicate. How the hell did I miss this important piece of information? Hell, at some point in all my years of dealing with made men you’d think I would’ve stumbled across his name. Jesus, I want to choke the life out of my director. I know he had to be privy to this information but for whatever reason, he left me in the dark.

  Flopping my ass down on the couch, I pick my phone up from the coffee table and scroll until I get to the name I’m looking for. I hit the call button and speaker the conversation. Studying my manicured nails, I wait on the asshole to answer.

  “Wallace.” His raspy voice echoes out into my living room. Over the last year, our direct line of contact has been by way of phone conversations only. It’s weird and unnerving not to speak face to face. I prefer direct eye contact when I’m pissed off or feel like I’ve been wronged.

  “Question for you…” I say as way of greeting. He knows by my tone that I’m pissed. Director Wallace also knows I’ve finally pieced this fuckery together, somewhat. Or at least I’m well on my way.

  “Well, I can’t say that I haven’t been expecting this call. I’ve been trying to get in touch with you though.” He says.

  “I’m sure you have.” That’s complete bullshit and we both know it. “I’m
conflicted right now, Director Wallace. I’m uncertain where to place the majority of my anger at. There are so many different factors to choose from.”

  “Agent Carter, listen.” He tries to interrupt me but that’s not going to work out for him.

  “No, no… You don’t get to speak because you had enough time to do that way before now. You sent me into this case without all the truths that an agent would need in order to navigate. I have a feeling that’s there a lot more at stake than what I know but I’ll figure it out Wallace and when I do, I’ll round back to you.”

  “Agent Carter, you don’t understand.”

  “That’s because you never clued me in. That should piss me off but honestly, it only intrigues me, Wallace. Then again, I’m a female. We tend to latch onto those emotional feels first and in my case, it’s truth. The simple knowledge that you thought my childhood connection to him would benefit the FBI in any way whatsoever is what makes this decision very easy for me, I quit.” I lean up and press the end button with a pissed off finger jab. “Asshole,” I whisper.

  “Well… That was unexpected.” That low cryptic voice sends chills racing up my spine. My neck snaps to the side only to find a very vacant set of dead eyes come into view.

  Crellan Haze steps through my darkened kitchen archway looking like a medieval matchup in the making. That toothpick is perfectly in place at the corner of his plush lips. His suit is impeccably handsome around his thick gangster body. And his black hair is slicked back but his five o’clock shadow gives off a hint of rebellious attitude. His overall statement screams beware of mafia madmen.

  Motherfucker…

  “Uhm, Crellan, how did you get into my house?” My voice sounds like a mixture of dread and completely fucked fear. Whatever that is. That’s exactly what I sound like. He smirks at me and let me tell you something, it’s a sinister sight.