That Girl: Bre

by Amber Monroe

  “Kourtnee!” I shouted then ran behind a half brick wall near the apartment entrance. I peeked my head over it and saw that she was looking around, trying to locate who called her. Was that my aunt? I was too shy to approach her, but I owed it to my cousin to get answers. She deserved to know if her mother was still alive or not, but would that hurt her if she knew that she was? As I looked over the wall again, I saw that she started to walk away. Shoot!

  “What took you so long?” Jemar asked when I finally made it into the apartment.

  “I thought I saw somebody I knew,” I said as I came out of my coat and hung it in the closet near the door. I turned around and noticed that there was a big ass Christmas tree in the corner of the living room. It was nicely decorated and lit with a huge gold star on top. There were presents all around the tree wrapped in sparkly wrapping paper. I looked at Jemar, and he was smiling with his hands tucked in the pockets of his joggers. I also noticed that the apartment had been cleaned and actually smelled good.

  “Jemar, what’s this?” I asked, still in shock by this surprise.

  “I wanted you to come home to a clean house and a little surprise. I hardly decorate for Christmas since I usually go visit my dad at the prison. Still, since this our first Christmas together, I wanted it to be one you remembered.”

  “That’s so sweet, bae. Thank you! Are all those gifts for me?”

  “Most of them are, but a couple of them are for the baby. I was told to get a neutral color shit since we don’t know the sex yet. I did buy a crib, though. We have to clear the other bedroom out first, then I’ll put it up.”

  “Jemar…” I said, then started crying. Maybe my mother wasn’t right. Perhaps we can make this work. And he can be a great father and potentially a good husband.

  “What’s wrong? It’s too much? You don’t like it?” He asked as he grabbed my chin, searching for answers through my eyes.

  “I love it. I’m just overwhelmed. I didn’t expect this at all. I honestly didn’t even know you had this side to you.” I confessed. Jemar and I just started dating this year, and we definitely jumped into things too fast. Technically we’ve only been together for about six months. And already there was a baby on the way, and we were living together. I know we already said I love you, but I still feel like I didn’t know him as well as I should have before I gave him my virginity.

  “I know, babe. I don’t always show this side of me, but this is a side that I promise to show you more. I want to do right by you and my child. I really do love you, Bre, and I promise I won’t do anything to hurt you.” He said. I honestly felt like this was a lie, but I foolish and willing to try to give him another chance. I just hope this doesn’t end up biting me in the ass.

  January

  2016

  9. Bre

  January 2016

  And it did. Literally, days later Jemar was back on his bullshit. I got up to fix us breakfast, and right after we ate, he mentioned that he had to go handle some business. I didn’t think anything of it since everything seemed okay, and I didn’t want to argue. So while he was gone, I set up my new phone that he bought me and put some of the presents up he bought. And I also took the time to make a list of everything we needed for the baby. Once I had my phone set up, I texted him so he would have the number. Hours went past, and I never heard from him. I started to get worried and immediately started calling his phone. He eventually answered after thirty calls and said he was on his way home.

  He did come home, but with his friends and they had been getting on my last nerves. I had to spend my New Year’s Day with them while they got drunk. The next day Jemar claimed he had to go to the barbershop, so I suggested that he drop me off at Chianne’s because there was no way I was staying at home with his friends. He dropped me off and said he would come back to get me after he left the shop.

  Unfortunately, that was three days ago, and I still haven’t seen him. Chianne didn’t mind, but I didn’t want to start using her place as a backup house whenever I was mad at Jemar. That’s why I needed to look into Section8 and see if I have any options because I need my own. I can’t keep doing this when I eventually have my baby. We need stability.

  “He still hasn’t answered?” Chianne asked as she came back into the room.

  “No,” I said.

  “What do you want to do?”

  “I don’t know, Chi. I’m so tired of this.”

  “Well, you know you can stay here. My grandmother won’t mind.”

  “I know, but your dad will be coming home soon.”

  “Don’t remind me.” She said, rolling her eyes.

  “You’re not happy about him coming home?”

  “I don’t know. It’s just that I don’t really know him. Yeah, I know we talk every week ever since I was little, but I don’t really know him. I’ve never actually spent time with him in person. I feel like I really don’t know who he is. And he wants me to just give up the life I have here and make a new one with him in Cali.”

  “I’ll kill for a new life somewhere else,” I mumbled.

  “I know you would, but not me. Everything I know and the people that I love are here.”

  “I get it, Chi, but just give him a chance. He seems like a nice guy from what you shared with me. Maybe he wants a fresh start with his kids.”

  “I guess, but why can’t we stay here and do that.”

  “Maybe being home reminds him of something he wants to forget and move on from.”

  “True.”

  “Just give it a thought. I wouldn’t mind visiting you.”

  “You and my god-baby.”

  “Right,” I said, rubbing my stomach. Just then, my phone started ringing. “Yeah?” I answered.

  “I have a drop to make, then I’m coming to pick you up,” Jemar said. I rolled my eyes because I didn’t believe him.

  “How bout you pick me up first, and I’ll come with you.”

  “Bre. I have a drop.” He said with emphasis on drop.

  “Okay, and I can’t come? I won’t be in the way.”

  “You do know you’re pregnant, right?”

  “And? I’m not getting out of the car with you. I’m just accompanying because I don’t trust you.”

  “Fine.” He said. I was shocked because I definitely thought we were going to argue about this for a while. “I’m on my way.” He said then ended the call.

  ∞∞∞

  We hardly talked on the way over to make his drop. I was lost in my thoughts, and I guess he was too. We ended up at a house party in Landover, Maryland, and once we got there, he got out to find somebody. I waited in the car for like twenty minutes until I had to pee. Holding my bladder was not an option, so I had to do what I had to. I prayed to God to protect me as I made my way to the house where the music was coming from. The house was pretty crowded and dim, so I had trouble finding the bathroom.

  “Bre?” I heard someone call out. I turned around and saw my cousin Natasha; she was my Aunt Cookie’s daughter. She emancipated herself when she was sixteen and has been on her own ever since. Aunt Cookie was an alcoholic and often put her addiction before her kids. There have been too many cases where they were taken from their home and had to stay with family members until Aunt Cookie sobered up. The Moore family wasn't as perfect and pristine as they wanted outsiders to believe. Anywho, Natasha and I weren’t really close, but we were cordial with each other. I know she was close to Keisha, just like I was.

  “Hey,” I said. As I walked up to her. She was sitting by some table with a punch bowl on it. She was so gorgeous. She has smooth brown skin with black almond-shaped eyes. She always reminded me of Milan from College Hill and always wore long jet black Malaysian weave. She was wearing a white v-neck bodysuit, olive green high-waisted frill hem casual pants, and brown ankle strap heels. And she had gold accessories on; large hoops, bangles, and a five-layers necklace. Her nails were white coffin style nails with bling on her index fingers.

  “What are you doing here?”
She said while hugging me.

  “My boyfriend came to meet a friend. I just need to use the bathroom.” I said, hugging her back.

  “I’ll show you.” She grabbed my hand and led me upstairs. I quickly used the bathroom, but as I was fininishing up I heard a lot of commotion; it sounded like a fight broke out. I wiped, flushed, and washed my hands. The hallways were crowded with people trying to see the action, I tried to brush past them and head down the stairs. As I was making my way down, I felt a hand on my hand that seemed to push me. I grabbed ahold of the railings and damn near ran down the stairs. Nobody knew that I was pregnant, but that pushed felt personal.

  Once I got outside, I saw many familiar faces and decided to walk upon them.

  “Hey, guys,” I said to KD, Craig, and Jay. They were my cousin’s Keisha friends, who eventually became my friends. I’ve known them for a long time, and they were like big brothers to me.

  “Lil Bre,” KD said as he hugged me. I hugged him back then gave the other two a hug too.

  “Oh shit, is it about to be a round two?” Craig joked. I was confused.

  “Did you see the fight?” KD asked.

  “What fight?”

  “Your cousins Keke and Tasha were throwing hands.”

  “They were fighting?” I shouted. Keisha and Tasha were far from the fighting type. I mean, they could probably handle their own, but that didn’t seem like them.

  “Were they? It was like Worldstar worthy.” Craig said.

  “Look who I found,” KD said as he turned around; it was my cousin Keisha. Keisha had some Moore features, but she had more of exotic features like her mother. She was a mix of Karin Jinsui, the girl from Instagram, or the actress, Lashontae Heckard.

  “Hey, Bre!” She said, hugging me.

  “Keke!” I said as I embraced me.

  “What are you doing here?” She asked. Even though she was older than me by a year, Keisha was like a big sister to me.

  “My boyfriend got invited and brought me along. Don’t worry, I’m about to leave.” I said.

  “We were just telling her that she missed the cousins vs. the rollas pay per view special.” Craig joked.

  “I’d rather see three against one, I’m just saying,” Jay said.

  “You good?” I asked her.

  “Yeah, I’m straight. It’s a long story, but one word: Dwayne.” She said. I knew all about her drama with her boyfriend Dwayne, and I could relate. Dwayne and Jemar were very similar.

  “Eww, he’s still around?” I said, rolling my eyes. I know I couldn’t talk, but Dwayne was the worst and didn’t deserve Keisha. Keisha had such a good heart and gave him too many chances. There was another girl in their mix, and she has also gotten pregnant twice and miscarried. Dwayne was just toxic.

  “Not anymore.” She admitted. I was jumping for joy on the inside.

  “Good. Hearing his name makes me itch.”

  “Hearing his name makes me want to give that brother some counseling. Such a lost soul.” Craig joked.

  “How’s Chianne?” She asked.

  “She’s good. Busy working as always.”

  “Okay. So what’s going on with you? I feel like we hardly talk anymore. You know, Tasha is in the house.”

  “I know. I saw her, and we spoke briefly. Can we talk for a minute?” I whispered. We slowly walked away from the guys and stood near some cars.

  “What’s up?” She asked.

  “Promise you’re not going to say anything. I’m pregnant.” I finally shared and felt some weight from my shoulder lessen. I cared a lot about what Keisha thought and was scared to tell her.

  “What? How? By who?”

  “You know how and by my boyfriend. I hope you don’t think I’m out here, “thottin’ and boppin’.”

  “I know you’re not, I didn’t mean it like that. Damn, does your mother know?”

  “Yeah, and it didn’t go as I thought it would.”

  “Does grandma know?”

  “You know my mother is best friends with her mother. I’m surprised that she didn’t mention it to you.”

  “Well, I have been busy working, going to school, and dealing with my own issues to sit down and catch up with her. But that is strange that she didn’t mention to me, especially since she knows we’re really close. Maybe Aunt Aretha didn’t tell her, she may think that grandma is going to be disappointed. You know how judgmental the family can be.”

  “You’re right, but it’s not like I’m having sex with any and everybody. He’s my first, and you know how it is when you’re in love. He’s not a bad guy at all, and we’re thinking about getting a place together. I’ll get my GED and take care of the baby while he works.”

  “Wait a minute, are you sure? You’re in the 10th grade- you’re not going to get the full experience of being in high school and graduating. You’re almost finished with school. I think you’re moving a little too fast, boo. You really think that he is going to be there for you and the baby?”

  “I know he is Kesh! I’m going to be a mother, and I’m scared, but I know that everything will be okay. Of course, I’m going to miss school, and I did think about dropping out for a year and then go back to graduate after the baby turns one.” I lied. I wasn't ready to tell Keisha everything and didn’t want her to feel bad for me.

  “What did your mother say?”

  “She said what I expected her to say, “Get the hell out of my house!”.

  “So, you’re not on speaking terms with her?” She asked and tears started to well up in my eyes.

  “I’m sorry cuzzie poo- You know that you’re like a little sister to me, and I just want you to make the right decision. Not with your heart, but with your mind.” She said.

  “Thanks, Kesh, and I understand, but I have to learn some things on my own,” I said, trying to blink my eyes so the tears would go back up. Just then, Jemar walked up to us with another familiar face.

  “Long time no see,” Dre said, hugging me.

  “I know!” I said, hugging him back then stood next to Jemar. “Keisha, this is my boyfriend,” I grabbed Jemar’s hand.

  “Bre talks about you all the time. I can see the resemblance. My name is Jemar.” He said.

  “Nice to meet you,” Keisha said. “Y’all know each other?” Keisha asked Dre.

  “Yeah, small world, right? My mother used to babysit him when he was five or six years old. I couldn’t wait until he left, he was bad as hell.” Dre joked.

  “Small world indeed,” Keisha said, looking Jemar up and down. That look wasn’t a look of approval. What did people see that I didn't?

  “Well, we’re not staying long. I’ll catch up with you later.” I said, hugging Keisha. We hugged again then walked away to Jemar’s car.

  “Did you do your drop?” I asked him as he pulled out of the parking lot.

  “Nah, the nigga didn’t even show up.” He said, annoyed.

  “So, are we going home?” I yawned. I was getting tired and was ready to get into the house.

  “Yeah, I’m going to drop you off.”

  “What? Again?” I shouted.

  “Bre, I’m not in the mood right now. I got too much shit on my mind.”

  “So can’t you come home and sleep on it? I haven’t seen you in days, and we’ve only been around each other for like thirty minutes. Are you that damn bothered by my presence?” I said, nearly crying. I was getting so tired of this shit. And to make matters worse, Jemar didn’t even respond. Then his phone started going off. I couldn’t get a real glance at the screen, but it definitely looked like it said, Tia.

  “Just take me back to Chianne’s house,” I said.

  ∞∞∞

  And he did just that. He dropped me off, and I didn’t even say anything to him before I got out of the car. I spent the night over Chianne’s house, had her drop me off at Jemar’s apartment, so I could change my clothes. I put on a white t-shirt, gray PINK gym pants, and a pair of Pink/Grey/White Nike Air Max 90.

  “Hello?
” She answered. She probably didn’t recognize the number.

  “Hey Keke, it’s me- Bre,” I said.

  “What’s up? You have a new number?”

  “Yeah, make sure you save it. I’m just bored and thought to call my favorite cousin.”

  “Well, I’m chilling today and have the house to myself. Do you want to come over?”

  “Yeah, I’ll have Chianne dropped me off in a few minutes.”

  “I’ll see you when you get here,” She said.

  Twenty minutes later, I showed up, and we hugged as I entered.

  “Where is everybody? I asked.

  “They went to go see Aunt Loretta,” Keisha said.

  “You didn’t want to go?”

  “Girl, you know I can’t stand her.”

  “Me, either, she told my mother that she needs to send me away to a boarding school,” I said, rolling my eyes. Way before all of this drama started, I overheard Aunt Loretta tell my mother that she should send me to a boarding school because I looked fast. She said that boarding school would keep me on the straight and narrow like her daughter Heaven. However, all of the cousins knew how wild Heaven could get once liquor hit her system. I don’t think boarding school would have done anything for me. Maybe I wouldn’t be pregnant, but it had nothing to do with being fast. I wasn’t really into boys, and when I finally was, I picked the wrong one. Unfortunately, I did get pregnant, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t hope for a better outcome.