In The Dark

by Sarah K. Jensen

“Sure, you did,” Laif growled.

  Bryson stared. “You’re kidding, right? Paulina is the queen witch from hell. You know I can’t stand her. I was just trying to lighten things up.”

  Laif swore and started to shove past Bryson.

  “Look,” Bryson said, stopping him. “The whole point of this was to help you work off steam. Not make you more upset.”

  “Well, thanks. It worked well.” Laif headed down the hall towards his room.

  Bryson didn’t want to leave things as they were, so he said, “Want to talk about something else? Like why I needed to work off steam?”

  The phone rang before Bryson could tell him he was probably, maybe, getting married.

  They both stared at the phone as if it might bite. Bryson was worried it might be Alannah, coming to her senses and calling to say that she couldn’t marry him after all. Laif must’ve had his own worries over what might be waiting on the other end because he seemed frozen in place as well. Finally, the old answering machine kicked on.

  “Laif? Are you home?”

  Laif didn’t move, so neither did Bryson.

  “I didn’t mean to run you off tonight. Boy, this is crazy. I guess you figured out that Ian’s my dad. And he didn’t abandon us like I’d thought.” She paused. “Anyway, he’s left. Said he’d be happy to meet with your family and explain things.” Another pause. “Are you there?”

  Laif finally moved and picked up the phone. “I’m here.”

  Bryson watched the change take place in his brother. His stance relaxing, his shoulders loosening. Wrestling hadn’t helped him at all, but Memphis’s voice sure seemed to do the trick. Honestly, wrestling hadn’t help Bryson either. Just made him feel too old to be acting like a teenager.

  Laif was smiling into the phone and said something about bringing ice cream when Bryson left him to take a shower. He’d tell Laif his own news tomorrow. If Alannah didn’t come to her senses before then.

  Memphis wanted to jump from the bed and run to Laif when he walked in but decided that would only show her hand. She needed to at least allude to being in control, even if she wasn’t. Not that she should jump up at the moment.

  “So,” Laif said with a boyish smile, “is this a typical babysitting job? You did say your dad thought you needed a babysitter, didn’t you?”

  At Memphis’s nod, Laif went on, “Let’s see. When I babysit for Julz, I usually hold the kids. Read them stories. Kiss their foreheads. Tickle them. Those kinds of things. Is that what I should do with you?”

  Memphis’s heart sped up and tried to leap from her chest. She tried to swallow, found her mouth as dry as the desert sand, and just stared like an idiot at Laif.

  He laughed, full and loud.

  “I guess we should stick to eating ice cream and talking,” he said as he made his way to her bed.

  “Your eye,” she said when he neared, and she saw the start of a bruise. “What happened?”

  He blushed beautifully and shrugged. “Letting off a little steam with Bry. He elbowed me. I’m pretty sure it was an accident.”

  “Does it hurt?” Of course, it hurt, she thought. Getting hit in the eye always hurt.

  Laif grinned and sank into the stiff chair beside her bed. “Only a little. Want to kiss it better?” he asked as he opened the paper bag and brought out a single container of Bluebell Butter Pecan ice cream and one plastic spoon. His Caribbean-blue eyes shimmered with mischief.

  Oh, yes, she wanted to kiss him better but decided that probably wouldn’t be prudent. She shouldn’t start kissing him, no matter that her mind and body kept trying to convince her otherwise. “We’d probably better stick to eating ice cream,” she said with what she hoped was a lighthearted laugh.

  “Okay then, scooch over, Dragon Slayer.” He stood and loomed over her. He was very tall, she realized, not for the first time. Broad-shouldered. Lean waist. She had somehow forgotten how powerful he was, how much attention he demanded. Laif seemed to fill the whole room with his presence. His aura.

  Memphis shook her head mentally, trying to focus on what he’d said, and raised her left brow, the only one that would move independently, and asked, “Dragon Slayer?”

  A dimple on his left cheek winked at her for just a second. “Yeah, well, you seem the kind of girl who could go out and slay a whole slew of dragons.”

  She couldn’t be sure, but Memphis thought a hint of irritation leaked out with the would-be compliment. He was a Guardian, and a manly-man on top of it, so it was very possible that he resented her role as a Guardian. And she remembered his Guardian Dragon. Did he mean that she could slay him? But she wasn’t sure, so, she let it pass.

  As she slipped to the edge of the hospital bed to make room, she said, “Tell me something personal about you.”

  Laif handed Memphis the pint of ice cream, kicked off his shoes, and slid into the be. He then took the container lid, discarding it on the chunky bed-side table. “Let’s see,” he said, rubbing his chin with the palm on his hand. “What do you know about me so far?”

  Nothing, hence the question. But she said aloud, “You have a large family that all love each other very much. You obviously have a job that requires you to wear a suit and has something to do with building. And you have eyes the color of deep ocean waters.”

  She felt the heat spread over her neck and face immediately. That last part came out of nowhere. But since she’d thought it so many times over the last couple of weeks, it wasn’t too shocking that it would leak through her brain to find her tongue.

  His smile was instantaneous. It spread across his face leaving that deep dimple in its wake. Memphis’s breath caught. She’d never seen a more handsome man. Ever. And when he smiled, he set off all kinds of bells and whistles inside her. The feelings he inspired were wonderful and scared the crap out of her at the same time.

  “Um,” she tried to speak but could think of nothing else to say.

  “I want to kiss you so bad it hurts,” Laif said as he lowered his head to hers.

  Memphis’s hand shot up between them. “That’s not a good idea. Not here anyway.” Because she knew, beyond any doubts, that if she let him kiss her while lying in bed with him, that things would go too far, no matter that she’d been shot and had surgery not long ago. Her body healed fast.

  Besides, she’d already been there before. She refused to go there a second time. Especially when that meant she wouldn’t be able to protect her son, or others, from Oíche Scáthanna.

  Laif just stared at her mouth for a few seconds more, then moved off the bed and stood there, watching her with those intense blue eyes. “You’re right. I don’t like this. This should not be so difficult. It’s like you’re some sort of beautiful witch who put a spell on me. I can’t think straight when I’m around you.” Then he shoved his hands through his hair, causing it to stick out in waves, and said, “Is it because you’re part fae? Is that it? Is it your beauty?”

  A slow piercing pain started around her heart. He thought her a witch. Thought since she was fae, she’d put a spell on him to make him want her. Thought her beauty was all she was. “Get out,” she whispered.

  His face turned incredulous and he stepped back as if he’d taken a direct hit in the face. “What? Why do you want me out?”

  Years of pain plunged through her and erupted. “I’m not a witch. I’m not a whore that would fall into bed with a man because he thinks I’m beautiful. There’s more to me than what everyone sees. I am flesh and blood. I have feelings. I didn’t bewitch you or anyone else. How could anyone think a little girl would make him want her that way? Why do guys blame the girl when they’re attracted to them? You think I wanted that? You think I asked for it? I might not be a saint, but I’m not a sinner either. At least not anymore. At least I try not to be. I guess I am sometimes since I’m not perfect. But who is? Who? You sure aren’t. And I didn’t put a spell on you, or any other man. You think I can help it that my father happens to be fae.”

  She swallowed, took a deep
breath, realizing she’d said too much and maybe not enough. Drained and scared of what he would say, she nodded to the door and said, “Now, get out.”

  Laif tilted his head to the side and just stared at her. Then he busted into a heart-crushing laugh. It was too much for Memphis, already week with missing Callan, the gunshot, falling in love with Laif, and Shane….

  Oh, crap. She loved him. She loved Laif Craig. Even without knowing any more about him than she did. She’d simply given him her heart. Well, nothing said she had to let him know. She didn’t have to tell him and give him that power over her. Because if he knew, it would ruin everything.

  Laif stopped laughing, dropped back down on the bed beside her, and cupped her cheek. “I’m sorry. Don’t cry.” He wiped wetness off from under her eye with the pad of this thumb. She hadn’t realized tears had fallen.

  “I wasn’t laughing at you; I was laughing at me. I’m not handling things very well, am I?” He bent his head and kissed her gently on the nose, then took the ice cream from her and sat it on the rolling hospital tray. “It’s just that I am so attracted to you. More so than I’ve ever been to any other woman, and it is way more than physical.” He smiled that dimpled smile again. “I feel connected to you in a way I’ve never been connected to another human being.

  “Come on, baby, I’m not trying to get you into bed with me.” He blushed beautifully. “You know what I mean. I’ve dated beautiful women before, but I’ve never felt anything close to what I’m feeling for you. I need more from a woman than just outward beauty. She needs substance. I want a wife who is kind and smart and not a saint or a sinner.”

  She sucked her breath in at the word wife and nearly missed the humor in his voice. Was he laughing at her still? Memphis jutted out her chin, trying to fortify herself.

  This was so fast. Was he saying he wanted to marry her? How could he? He didn’t know her, not really.

  “Laif—”

  He shook his head, and gently placed a finger over her lips, and then said in a husky voice, “What I’m trying to say, is that I really want to get to know you better. I want to know what makes you smile and what makes you cussing mad. Besides me. I want to know about your family, your past, and how you feel about it all. I want to understand more about your Guardianship and try not to be intimidated by it. I want you to look at me, the way you’re looking right now, for the rest of our lives.”

  He took a deep breath and Memphis wondered what was in her eyes that he liked so much.

  “I want to lie beside you and make love to you every night and every morning when we wake up.”

  Memphis couldn’t speak. Her mind had hit a wall and the words I want to make love to you and circled there.

  He didn’t say he loved her.

  He wanted to make love to her but didn’t say he loved her. He hinted at marriage. But not at love. She couldn’t assume that because he was a Guardian, that he would marry her if they made love.

  Maybe Caoimhe had only cursed Síofra’s line. Maybe Laif could sleep with any woman he wanted and still fight with that white sand of his. Áinle had taken a mistress and fathered a child and there was no record of him losing any of his powers. Maybe Nuadha’s line could do the same.

  “I can’t be with you.” Her voice sounded weak, even to her own ears. “I’ll not be able to fight if I did. I’m not saying that I’m not attracted to you, because you know I am, but I won’t sleep with you. I can’t. I won’t.”

  Laif looked completely dumbfounded. “I’m not asking you to sleep with me, Memphis. I’m saying that I want to get to know you better.”

  “You said you wanted to make love to me.”

  He smiled, but this time, it didn’t touch his eyes. “I do, heaven help me. But I would only make love to you if you were my wife. I wouldn’t be able to fight either. And I mean to be able to protect you for as long as you need me to. I want to—” he broke off.

  “That’s not important yet. What’s important is for us to get to know each other and for us to feel comfortable with each other. I won’t touch you. And I won’t kiss you until you’re ready.”

  But did he love her? She knew, deep down, that he cared for her, but would that be enough? For now, at this moment, she decided it would.

  “Lay with me and sleep,” she said, taking his hand in hers. “I’ll tell you everything important tomorrow when you take me to my apartment. My home is protected, so it will be safer to talk.”

  She looked into the deep blue sea of his eyes and smiled; letting all the love—dear heavens, it really was love she felt for him—show. “Is that okay for now?”

  His dimple winked and he bent, again, and kissed her forehead. “For now, that’s everything.”

  Laif snuggled in, spooning Memphis next to him, and rested his hand above the bandage on her stomach. He buried his face in her mussed hair and after a short while, his breathing evened out and Memphis knew he’d fallen asleep. Minutes later, she followed.

  Chapter 15

  Memphis and Laif stood outside the bike shop just below Memphis’s apartment and she took a deep breath. Once he was inside with her, she’d tell him about Callan. Show him pictures of her son and tell him about the man who had gotten her pregnant—she didn’t consider Jacob Callan’s father. Jacob had never even seen her son.

  As she turned the key in the lock, she silently prayed that this would not be the end of things for them. She pushed the door open, stepped inside, and invited him upstairs.

  At the door to her apartment, Laif stopped and ran his fingers along the old solid oak door and the Irish carvings for protection, similar, she was sure, to the ones on his parents’ home. He smiled but said nothing. She took a deep breath, girding up her courage, and opened the door. Laif looked around the front room, nodded, and said, “Not bad. You’ve made it really nice.”

  She wasn’t sure what he’d expected and wondered if this statement was a compliment or not. Not that it really mattered if he liked her apartment. It was what it was. So, she let it pass.

  “Would you like a glass of water? I doubt my milk and orange juice are good anymore. I could make some Kool-Aid.”

  He raised his brows. “Kool-Aid?”

  Here it was. The leeway she needed. “Yeah. Um. The thing is—”

  “Mom! You’re home?” Callan said, bursting through the front door. Her stomach clenched at the puzzled expression on Laif’s face. Suddenly she felt clammy and her throat dried up.

  “I wanted to explain things first,” she whispered.

  “Mom!” With that, her little man all but flew into her arms. “I’ve missed you so much. Are you all right?” Then he glanced over at a pale-faced Laif and asked, “Who’s that?”

  Memphis swallowed, but still had a hard time speaking. She studied Laif for a moment, and then smiled as best she could at her son. “This is a friend of mine. He’s another Guardian. His name is Laif. He helped me out when I had a little trouble with some Oíche Scáthanna.”

  The look Laif gave her was incredulous. He stared at her face, hard. Studied her from head to toe and then pasted on a smile so brittle Memphis thought his face would crack. Laif turned to Callan and said, in a fake cheerful voice, “That’s right. I’m a Guardian who helped out your mom. Wanted to make sure she was safe. Now, I need to be going.”

  Without another look toward Memphis, Laif walked out of the apartment.

  “Mom?” Callan looked up at her and whispered, “You like him, don’t you?”

  Memphis couldn’t answer. She felt as if all the air in the room left with Laif. The insincere pleasantness in his voice was worse than if he’d hit her. Her mind began to spin out of control and her legs turned to jelly and she fell to her knees.

  Callan dropped down beside her and wrapped his thin, but strong arms around her waist. “It’s going to be okay, Mom. You’ll see.” He looked straight into her eyes and wiped tears away. “We’ll fix this. Some way, Mom, we’ll fix this.”

  “I should have told him about you
before now. I was planning on bringing him here and showing him your picture and telling him everything. I almost told him last night, but I chickened out. I was scared about what he’d think about me.”

  Callan straightened his spine. “If he doesn’t know what a great person you are, then he doesn’t deserve your attention. He doesn’t deserve you.” He took Memphis’s face in his twelve-year-old hands and whispered, “It might be me, Mom. A lot of guys are interested in Joan until they find out about Kiley. And she’s the best little kid ever. Most of the time.”

  Memphis chuckled, almost hysterically. “If Laif doesn’t like you, then he’s crazy. Hopefully, he’s just a little shocked and will come around soon. We don’t know each other very well. We just met recently, so I guess it doesn’t matter too much.”

  Callan stared hard at his mom. “I’ve got a feeling it matters a lot.”

  Memphis didn’t know what to say. She didn’t have secrets with her son, at least not many, except for the getting shot thing, and she fully intended to tell him about that. She’d have to tell him how she felt about Laif and make sure he was okay with it, because if not, then none of this mattered anyway.

  “Let’s sit on the couch and talk, baby. I need to tell you what’s gone on this last week. But first, what are y’all doing back so soon?”

  Callan took her hand and led her over to the plaid green and brown couch, which had seen better days, and sat. “I knew something was wrong and told Joan we had to come home. She and Kiley agreed, so we packed up yesterday and drove straight back. We’ve only been here about ten minutes when I heard you.”

  Taking in that her son had put her first, over a fun-filled summer, lit her heart. She kissed his brow and thanked him for being so grown up. She then told him about Shane drinking and shooting her on the way to meet Laif, and how she’d spent almost a week in the hospital. And that Laif had been there the whole time.

  How he’d taken care of her, and that his family wanted her to stay with one of them so that she’d be safe until she was back to one hundred percent. She told him that she was in love with Laif, but it would work only if he accepted Callan.