William Shakespeare's Avengers

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William Shakespeare's Avengers Page 12

by Ian Doescher


  Downloading all their secrets, thoughts, and deeds—

  And copy all unto Maria Hill

  Who, at headquarters, waits with bated breath.

  ROMANOFF

  [into radio:] We are lock’d down outside—bleak foes are

  trounc’d.

  ROGERS

  [into radio:] Get thou to Banner for his lullaby. 120

  [Exit Steve Rogers.

  ROMANOFF

  [aside:] The singer green knows but dark melodies.

  STARK

  I know thou, Strucker, hideth more than files.

  Pray, JARVIS, fashion me an infrared

  Inspection of the building.

  JARVIS

  —On thy left:

  My scan shows th’wall is reinforc’d by steel. 125

  There are, as well, air currents running through.

  STARK

  Int’resting. Be a secret door, I pray!

  A secret door, ’twould be so fun for me,

  A secret door, as found in children’s tales,

  A secret door, to hidden rooms beyond, 130

  A secret door doth lead to fun overt!

  [He pushes on a wall, revealing and opening a secret door.

  Hurrah!

  [Stark proceeds inside, investigating. Exit Stark.

  ROMANOFF

  [to Hulk:] —Holla, thou large and frightful man.

  The sun descendeth lower in the sky,

  And dusk shall follow on. Come thou to me—

  In our communion find thy calm again. 135

  [Hulk walks to Romanoff. She gently caresses his hand. Exit Hulk.

  ENTER BRUCE BANNER, FALLING.

  BANNER

  A comfort great thou art, who brings me back—

  A worthy friend. Thou hast my gratitude.

  [Exeunt Romanoff and Banner.

  ENTER STEVE ROGERS ON BALCONY. ENTER BARON STRUCKER SEVERALLY.

  ROGERS

  Thou Baron Strucker, knave and villain both—

  Of Hydra thou art still thug number one.

  STRUCKER

  Were you to language technic’ly employ, 140

  I am a thug for S.H.I.E.L.D. and always was.

  ROGERS

  Then technic’ly, thou art now unemploy’d.

  Where is the scepter Loki once acquir’d?

  STRUCKER

  Fear not—I know when I am beaten, Captain.

  You shall, I hope, make mention of how I 145

  Cooperated when ’twas needed, yes?

  ROGERS

  ’Twill in my notes appear, right underneath

  Illegal humanoid experiments.

  How many of thy enhanced beasts are here?

  ENTER WANDA MAXIMOFF, SHOOTING FLAMES AT ROGERS, WHO FALLS. SHE HIDES.

  [Into radio:] Another soul, enhanc’d, hath just

  appear’d— 150

  A female. Colleagues, hear: do not engage.

  STRUCKER

  You must be faster if you’d overcome—

  [Rogers kicks his shield up and hits Strucker with it, knocking him out.

  ROGERS

  Was’t fast enow? [Into radio:] I have ta’en Strucker down.

  [Exeunt Steve Rogers and Baron Strucker.

  STARK

  [into radio:] I have found something even bigger still—

  A vicious metal beast, leviathan, 155

  Like those who in New York did work us woe.

  [Wanda sneaks up behind Stark.

  Thor, I have found the scepter we do seek.

  [Wanda, unseen, plies magic on Stark’s mind.

  Stark begins hallucinating.

  [Aside:] Alas, I see the monstrous brute take flight!

  Fetch me your help; and be ye here again

  Ere the leviathan can swim a league. 160

  What visions fall upon my fearful eyes?

  My friends, all fallen, beaten—some deceas’d!

  Avengers, will ye not rise up again?

  How shall I, by myself, your souls avenge?

  O misery, e’en mighty Hulk laid low. 165

  The Captain’s shield destroy’d an ’twere thin wood.

  Steve’s voice doth call to me: “Thou couldst have sav’d us!

  Why didst thou not do more than thou hast done?”

  Alack, now I am desolate, alone,

  Whilst heaven opens, showing me the stars. 170

  There, ranks on ranks of enemies rejoice,

  For they have slain th’Avengers, overwhelm’d

  We few, we happy few, we band of brothers.

  [His hallucination ends abruptly.

  A flash, and lo—the vision doth depart!

  ENTER PIETRO MAXIMOFF ON BALCONY, RUSHING TO WANDA’S SIDE.

  PIETRO

  [aside, to Wanda:] Shall we, then, let them swiftly take the

  staff? 175

  WANDA

  This notion in thy head doth make me laugh.

  [Exeunt.

  SCENE 2

  Within the Avengers’ airship, the Quinjet.

  ENTER TONY STARK, STEVE ROGERS, THOR, BRUCE BANNER, NATASHA ROMANOFF, AND CLINT BARTON. BARTON LIES ON A GURNEY, RECOVERING. BANNER LISTENS TO MUSIC. THE VOICE OF JARVIS IS PRESENT. LOKI’S SCEPTER SITS ASIDE.

  BANNER

  [aside:] The strains of opera appease my soul,

  And drive the recent trouble from my mind.

  Some peace I’ve made withal the giant man,

  Whose other half I am, and he is mine.

  A glooming peace this moment with it brings— 5

  His presence maketh me uncomfortable,

  Yet some strange comfort’s mine when he is near.

  I nearly have him under my control,

  Yet still his rage doth pain and frighten me.

  Would that these notes could sing a better song, 10

  An aria that would my life repair—

  O “Casta diva,” canst thou make it so?

  ROMANOFF

  [to Banner:] Our lullaby work’d better than before,

  The darkness fled and thou return’dst to light.

  BANNER

  ’Twas unforeseen, the grand code green that happ’d. 15

  ROMANOFF

  If thou hadst not been with us in the field,

  Our fate would drearier have been; we would

  Have counted nearly double casualties.

  My best friend would be but a memory,

  A treasure in the recesses of mind. 20

  BANNER

  At times, precisely what I wish to hear

  Is largely, still, not what I wish to hear.

  ROMANOFF

  How long before thou givest me thy trust,

  And see not shadows o’er my loyalty?

  BANNER

  ’Tis not thee I trust not—it is the Hulk. 25

  ROMANOFF

  [to Thor:] Thor, give me thy report upon the Hulk—

  What deeds did he to our bleak foes today?

  THOR

  The gates of Hel do echo with the screams

  Of victims of the mighty, dreadful Hulk.

  BANNER

  [aside:] For pity, these vast proclamations sting! 30

  THOR

  Er, mayhap I spoke too impulsively—

  ’Twas not screams of the dead. Nay, no, not those,

  Of course not. Wounded screams. ’Tis all, be sure.

  ’Twas whimpering, complaining, in the main—

  Full many tales of deltoids sprain’d and gout. 35

  STARK

  I bid thee, Banner—Doctor Cho shall soon

&n
bsp; Arrive from Seoul. Is’t well with thee were she

  To take up residence within thy lab?

  She would set up equipment and array

  The tools of her profession thereabouts. 40

  BANNER

  ’Tis well—the woman’s skill is deep and vast,

  And quite familiar is she with my lab.

  STARK

  Immense my gratitude. [Quietly to JARVIS:] Bid her

  prepare

  For ev’ry circumstance, for Barton needs

  Whatever therapies she can provide. 45

  JARVIS

  Indeed, sir.

  STARK

  —Instantly, pray navigate.

  [JARVIS takes over steering the ship.

  JARVIS

  I shall. Our vector of approach is lock’d.

  STARK

  [to Thor:] Is not the feeling satisfying, Thor?

  Thou hast search’d for the staff since S.H.I.E.L.D.

  collaps’d.

  Of course, I have enjoy’d our merry raids— 50

  THOR

  This brings our efforts to a fitting end.

  ROGERS

  Once we discover what ’twas usèd for,

  Then shall I know the closure I desire.

  ’Tis not just weapons, nay—since when is he,

  This simple-minded Strucker, capable 55

  Of the enhancement of the human form?

  STARK

  In time shall Doctor Banner and myself

  Make our examination of the scepter

  Ere it to Asgard maketh its return.

  Is’t well with thee, Thor? Some few days until 60

  The party when we bid good riddance to’t.

  Thou, though, shalt stay?

  THOR

  —Of course, I would not flee

  When merriment on the horizon comes—

  A victory with revels should be crown’d.

  STARK

  Insane the person who loves revels not. 65

  True, Captain?

  ROGERS

  —Hopefully this puts an end

  Unto both Hydra and Chitauri, too.

  Thus, yea—’tis time for revels, true enow.

  [The airship lands at Stark Tower. Exit Thor.

  ENTER MARIA HILL AND DOCTOR HELEN CHO, WITH MEDICAL ASSISTANTS. BARTON IS RUSHED INTO THE CARE OF CHO.

  ROMANOFF

  [aside:] Farewell then, Clint, until we meet again.

  Pray heal thou quickly, thou the best of friends— 70

  Dwell not in solemn shades of endless night.

  HILL

  [to Stark:] The lab for thee hath been preparèd, boss.

  [Stark points to Rogers.

  STARK

  I am no boss, ’tis he. I merely pay

  For ev’rything thou spiest roundabout

  And fashion the designs for ev’rything— 75

  Make ev’ryone look more attractive, too.

  [All walk aside, relaxing after the battle, while Rogers and Hill speak.

  ROGERS

  Of Strucker, what report hath come of late?

  HILL

  He is deliver’d into NATO’s hands.

  ROGERS

  The two enhanc’d—aught of their genesis?

  HILL

  They’re Wanda and Pietro Maximoff. 80

  Twins, orphan’d at the tender age of ten

  When bombshells in a war zone causèd their

  Apartment building to collapse in heaps.

  Sokovia a troubl’d hist’ry hath—

  ’Tis nowhere special, yet doth lie upon 85

  The route to ev’rywhere that special is.

  ROGERS

  What keen abilities possess the duo?

  HILL

  Pietro hath metabolism high—

  Increas’d from normal humans mightily.

  He also hath improv’d homeostasis 90

  In fluctuating thermal zones, which means

  He can exist in any temp’rature.

  His sister, Wanda, hath the power of

  Neuroelectric interfacing and

  Telekinesis, mental influence. 95

  ROGERS

  Would that thou spakest in plain English, Hill.

  HILL

  The man is fast, with a weird sister, sir.

  ROGERS

  We shall meet them again, sans doubt.

  HILL

  —Agreed.

  The file reports they both were volunteers

  For Strucker’s bold, unsafe experiments. 100

  ’Tis most insane.

  ROGERS

  —From thy mouth to mine ears:

  What kind of monstrous characters would let

  A German scientist conduct his tests

  Upon themselves, a country to protect?

  HILL

  [aside:] He catcheth me in mine own turn of phrase 105

  As if I spoke of him, not these two fiends.

  [To Rogers:] We’re not at war as once the globe was, Captain.

  ROGERS

  They are—for them, the war is present truth.

  [Exit Maria Hill.

  STARK

  [aside:] Behold, below, my iron clones return—

  A fleet of smart machines protecting us. 110

  Ne’er did I think, when all was wealth and fests,

  That this would be the path of Tony Stark.

  BANNER

  [to Stark:] How is our patient doing? He who hath

  Endur’d an injury immense—e’en Barton.

  STARK

  Ill-fortune strikes him—he is still himself: 115

  The stubborn, irritable man we love.

  BANNER

  They could not fix his personality?

  A disappointment vast.

  STARK

  —Improving is

  The man’s condition, steadily. He’s fine—

  Is thirsty for a drink, which doth bode well. 120

  [To JARVIS:] Now, JARVIS, it is playtime—look alive.

  Two days or fewer with this joystick I

  Have been entrusted—let us make the most

  Thereof. Update me on the structural

  And compositional analysis. 125

  JARVIS

  The scepter is unknown, is alien,

  With elements I cannot quantify.

  STARK

  It follows there are elements thou canst?

  JARVIS

  The jewel is protective housing for

  Another substance that resides within, 130

  A substance pow’rful.

  STARK

  —Is it a reactor?

  JARVIS

  More like ’twere a computer. I believe

  I hit upon and am deciph’ring code.

  ROMANOFF

  [to Cho:] Art sure the grimmest moments have elaps’d,

  And Barton shall be in good health anon? 135

  The pretense we have made of needing him—

  And liking him, and treasuring him, too—

  Hath brought the team together, verily.

  CHO

  No possibility remaineth of

  Deterioration. On the nano level, 140

  His functionality molecular

  Is instantaneous—a cheering sign.

  The cells know not they bond with simulacra.

  BANNER

  Great gifts! The woman is creating tissue.

  CHO

  If you had brought him to my pers’nal lab, 145

  My cradle of regeneration could

  Achieve
this simple task in twenty minutes.

  STARK

  It seems the man is flatlining—call time.

  BARTON

  Nay, I shall live fore’er—thou must forgive.

  A phoenix rising from the ashes I, 150

  Constructed out of plastic.

  STARK

  —I have brought

  The beverage thou ask’d for.

  CHO

  [to Barton:]      —You shall be

  Constructed of yourself and nothing more,

  I do assure you, Master Barton. E’en

  Your girlfriend shall not know the difference. 155

  BARTON

  I have no girlfriend. I’ve not found the chick.

  CHO

  Alas, such remedies I proffer not.

  To fix your singleness is past my ken.

  [To Stark:] This is the future of technology—

  Your clunky metal suits soon obsolete, 160

  Left in the dust of my advancing skill.

  STARK

  Indeed, ’tis just the future I do seek.

  I, Helen, do expect to see thee at

  The merriments we hold on Saturday.

  CHO

  Nay, unlike you I have no extra time 165

  For revels, parties, and your merriments.

  Though, as I think on it: shall Thor attend?

  [All smile. Exeunt Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Clint Barton, and Doctor Helen Cho as Stark and Banner walk aside.

  BANNER

  What is the giant rumpus JARVIS makes?

  Thine eyes tell me he hath discover’d aught.

  STARK

  It is the scepter. We had cause to ponder 170

  How Strucker so inventive had become.

  I, therefore, analyz’d the gem within.

  [Stark projects the structure of the gem.

  Dost recognize the structure?

  BANNER

  —JARVIS ’tis,

  Thy great and worthy artificial mind.

  STARK

  Initially, wise JARVIS started as 175

  A nat’ral language user interface.

  Now, though, the Iron Legion he commands.

  More of the business doth he operate

  Than anyone excepting Pepper. See?

  He is top-of-the-line, a paradigm, 180

  The ne plus ultra, highest of the high.

  BANNER

  Thy point is amply proven.

  JARVIS

  —I suspect

  ’Tis not for long I shall be so.

  STARK

  [to Banner:]       —Inspect

  The competition JARVIS faceth now.

  [Stark projects another, far more complicated structure.

  BANNER

  ’Tis huge, ’tis beautiful!

  STARK

  —If thou must guess, 185

 

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