by Jack Stroke
Amber couldn’t help but smile once more. A certain amount of tenacity was required when working for Diamond Logistics, but the kid was relentless. Maybe Amber would have to call Mother and ask just to give herself a few moments of peace.
11
“You should have come.”
“I’m not family.”
“Neither am I.”
Vaughan’s boat swayed ever so slightly beneath Amber. Very pleasant. Calming. The more time she spent on the boat, the more she liked it, a little like Vaughan himself.
“You’re virtually family. A lot closer than I am.”
“Joan would have loved to have you there. Plus an extra person would have been good to distract from all of Megan’s moaning.”
“What was she moaning about?”
“I don’t know. Whatever. Everything is an inconvenience. Everything is worth moaning about.”
“Not like Chill Amber,’ eh, kid?”
Vaughan had latched onto the whole Chill Amber thing with a little too much enthusiasm. He loved it, bringing it up at every opportunity.
“Chill Amber did fine, thank you very much.”
They settled into the deck chairs, comfortable in the quiet, no need to say anything. This degree of comfort concerned Amber on some level. It was too much. She couldn’t imagine what Mother would say. Too much comfort made one vulnerable.
If anyone had asked Amber a few months ago, she would have believed she could have lived without all of this - other people, closeness, love. And yet now she was becoming aware how much she had missed in her years as an assassin. She made a conscious choice to let the fear go. This was just how life was right now. Concern it was making her soft helped nothing.
“I’m thinking of getting a dog,” Vaughan said.
“Oh, yeah? Do dogs like living on boats?”
“Why not?”
Would she be okay with the dog? There was barely enough room for the two of them on Vaughan’s boat. She couldn’t imagine bringing a third living creature into the mix. And it was Vaughan. There was no chance he’d end up with some small dog. He’d want an animal the size of a small horse. Did any of that matter? She still stayed in her cabin at Paradise by the Bay more than she stayed on the boat.
“What do you think?”
“Can’t imagine Lion would like it very much.”
“He doesn’t get a say.”
“If you want a dog, you should go for it,” Chill Amber said.
Around them the days slowly disappeared. In time Vaughan reached into the cooler for another beer. It was the most either of them moved.
“Did Ben enjoy it?”
“His big dinner? I think so.”
“He’s getting pretty muscular. Strong.”
“You can’t beat him at basketball anymore?”
“I never could beat him at basketball.”
“I think he enjoyed tonight. He wouldn’t have been too happy dressing up either, but he didn’t whinge about it endlessly like Megan. She just seemed disinterested in the whole thing. On her phone more than anything else.”
“Makes sense.”
Amber didn’t pick up on it at first. Makes sense. Odd phrase to use.
“Why’s that?”
“Why’s what?”
“Why does it make sense she was on her phone?”
“The new man and all.”
“What new man?”
“Didn’t you say she had a new man?”
“No.”
“Yes, you did. A while back. You might think I don’t listen, but I remember. You were worried about it.”
“Why?”
“Because you weren’t Chill Amber yet. That’s the sort of thing you worry about.”
Amber played the events back in her mind. Something didn’t sit right. When Megan had started getting all these texts and acting funny, yes, Amber had suspected maybe it was a new man. Had she said anything to Vaughan?
She leaned forward and stared at him.
“What?”
“I never said anything about Megan and a new man.”
“Okay.”
“So spill it.”
“What?”
“You know something.”
“No, I don’t.”
“You’re not a great liar, Vaughan.”
“Maybe you could give me lessons sometime.”
“Tell me what you know.”
“I don’t know anything.”
“Vaughan.”
“Even if I did, what does it matter anyway? It’s Megan’s business.”
“That’s it? You’re not going to tell me?”
“Nothing to tell.”
Amber found herself on her feet.
“Where are you going?”
“There’s something going on. I would like you to be honest with me. Clearly you don’t want to —”
“That’s rich. You lecturing me about being honest.”
“— so I am removing myself from the situation. Good night.”
“Are you coming back? Amber?”
She ignored him, climbing off the boat.
“What happened to Chill Amber?”
“Oh, shut up.”
Amber attempted to make her walk as casual as possible, doing as much as she could to disguise the fact she was indeed leaving in a huff.
12
Ben sat in his room, attempting to really look at it. He was in this room every day of his life, yet how often did he actually see it? The space seemed small, as though he had outgrown it. As though he didn’t fit any more. It was the only bedroom he had ever known. He tried to think back to his old room when he was a little kid. He had a vague sense of the space more than any real memories. Would it be the same with this room one day? Hard to see how.
He stood and bowed to himself in the middle of the floor. The memories from the Diamond Logistics facility were fading fast too. Losing their freshness and becoming fuzzy and indistinct. An invisible opponent came at him. Ben dispatched him over his left shoulder. Was that right? He performed the move again, more slowly. Simone, the instructor, had said something about this. What was it?
The frustration rose steadily, both through not being able to remember the specifics and not having a proper opponent to practice on. The invisible opponent came at him again. This time Ben took evasive action, falling to the floor. It’s possible he fell with too much force. There was a knock at the door.
“Ben? Ben?” Joan said with unnecessary alarm. “Are you all right? I heard a crash. ”
The door flew open before he had a chance to stand.
“I’m fine, Joan.”
“What are you doing on the floor?”
“Just some exercise.”
It was challenging keeping the attitude out of his voice. Fortunately he heard the ads finish on the television.
“I think your show’s back on.”
Joan’s British detective program was nearing the big reveal, so she didn’t linger for a chart.
Alone once more, Ben attempted a less noisy manoeuvre. This wasn’t working. He felt like he was fourteen again, pretending to be a rock star with a tennis racket. How did Amber do it? That wasn’t a fair comparison. She had been an agent for years. They must teach you all this stuff at some point. Not simply how to fight but how to train, with or without an actual partner.
The shrill ring of his phone interrupted things. No caller ID. His heart leapt while his brain told him it was going to be nothing. Someone trying to sell him something or…
“Hello?”
“Ben?”
“Yes?”
“This is Tony with Diamond Logistics.”
“Yes, ummm, hello. Hi. I remember… remember you.”
It was like he had never used his mouth for talking before.
“Please hold for Mother.”
Ben paced in what little room he had, the phone pressed so hard against his ear it hurt. The wait was only a few minutes presumably. It could have been days, Ben suspended i
n the moment. Wanting, waiting, hoping.
Finally:
“Benjamin.”
“Oh, hi. How are you?”
“You may call us Mother.”
“Sorry?”
“You were hesitant to know how to address us when we came on the line. You may call us Mother.”
“Okay. Thank you… Mother.” It didn’t want to come out of his mouth.
“You have questions.”
“Yes, many.”
“We have no answers for you at this stage.”
“Oh… Okay.”
A long silence followed which Ben wasn’t sure if he was supposed to fill.
“How —”
“Where are you, Benjamin?”
“In my room.”
“The holiday cabins, Paradise Cove?”
“Yes. The owner’s cottage. You remember.”
“Yes.”
More silence.
“We need your help.”
“Oh, okay. Great. Yeah. Just… Yeah. Just tell me what you would like.”
“You’ve finished school now.”
“I have.”
“That’s good.”
More silence.
“Is this help a job or training or —”
“We said.”
“You did?”
“We have no answers for you at this stage.”
Her tone was perfectly flat. No hint of annoyance and yet a stinging rebuke all the same.
“It will be in the next few days. Please be ready.”
“I will. I —”
“Goodbye, Benjamin.”
Ben was back in his room, staring at the blank phone screen. It was all he could do not to explode through the ceiling.
13
It took Amber a good half an hour to find Lion. He wasn’t in any of his usual haunts. Eventually she located him under a tree, simply sitting, surveying all before him like a king looking out over his land.
Amber didn’t try and pick him up. She sat alongside and gave him a gentle part. He shifted his head slightly towards her with appreciation. Apart from that he didn’t move. The two of them enjoyed the cool night air together.
Megan exited the cottage, talking on her phone now. Talking and laughing. She put her hand over the receiver when she spotted Amber.
“What are you doing, Beetroot?”
“Just patting Lion.”
“You have a fight with Vaughan?” she asked. Her smile dug into Amber’s skin.
“No.”
Megan shuffled away to where she could chat without danger of being overheard. Ben appeared shortly after. He was on his way towards Amber’s cabin when he spotted her sitting on the grass.
“You okay?”
“Yep. Just patting Lion.”
“Did you and Vaughan…”
“Why does everyone think that? Aren’t I allowed to pat Lion? I pat Lion every day.”
Ben shrugged.
Was she really this predictable and transparent?
“Not a fight, but he was being… a pain.”
“Okay.”
Ben joined in patting duties. Lion was quite content having two people attend to him.
“Mother called,” Ben said eventually.
Amber glanced at him. “I’m impressed.”
“Why?”
“You appear quite calm and contained. You didn’t run from the house screaming and yelling or anything.”
He smiled.
“Okay, that’s good,” Amber said.
Was it, though? Maybe inevitable would have been a better description.
“When she says ‘we’…”
“She just meant her. Her as in Diamond Logistics.”
Ben nodded. “I know I ask too many questions…”
“That’s all right. Ask away.”
“She didn’t… call you first or anything?”
“No. I had no idea.”
“What do you think… I mean… Do you think…?”
“I’m sorry, I don’t know, Ben.”
Lion stood and stretched and strutted away, his attention taken by something across the grass only he could see.
“It’s hard to know what to tell you.”
“What happened with you?”
Amber thought. “To be honest, I can’t recall. That was a long time ago. Plus, I’m not sure how things work now. Mother probably does things differently. I’m not involved in that side of things.”
“Yeah, but… She wouldn’t put me out in the field, would she? Is that what you would call it, the field? I mean, there would be more training, or… “
“Presumably. Unless she needed something. Besides, every training is a mission and every mission is training. Did you call her Mother?”
“I did. It felt wrong coming out of my mouth.”
“She would have loved that.”
“That I did it or that it felt wrong?”
“Both. Are you excited?”
“I think so. It would be nice to have more information.”
“Get used to it. What did she say exactly?”
“Just to be ready.”
“Sounds like Mother. She likes her games, Ben. Always keep that in mind. She likes her games, and she likes to blur the line between the two.”
“Why?”
“It’s just Mother. How she does things.”
They sat in silence for a bit. Megan wandered by, giving them a look.
“I guess it’s a little strange, us sitting here,” Ben said. “Now Lion is gone.”
“I guess.”
Across the road, the ocean continued its gentle yet relentless attack on the shore. It was probably her imagination, but if she concentrated, Amber could feel the low-level excitement almost radiating off her godson.
14
Amber ended up spending the night with Vaughan. Ben’s big news did it. She was still annoyed with Vaughan, and yet somehow when Ben told her about Mother calling and Amber started to worry about that, she had too much to worry about. Overload. Swimming with concern, her brain gently reminded her she was supposed to be Chill Amber, and so she made an active effort to worry about nothing at all.
Heading back to the boat was like making a show of her lack of concern.
And really, she shouldn’t be too hard on herself. By any objective measure, she had come a long way since first arriving at Paradise Cove. First, she had got rid of the alarms. She still slept with the Sig under her pillow, but she couldn’t do it here on Vaughan’s boat obviously. Not without answering a whole lot of awkward questions.
The first few times she stayed over she was so restless it barely classified as sleep. However, more recently she had managed to drift off into a dreamlike state, not really asleep or awake, but comfortable and content. Happy in the knowledge of where she was and who she was with.
Amber was in that in-between state when there was a sudden burst of yelling and footsteps. She sat up, fruitlessly searching under her pillow. Nothing there. The door flew open and a breathless Grubby charged in.
“Vaughan, Vaughan! The best thing ever has happened. Ever!”
“Grubby…” Amber said, somewhere between exclaiming and scolding.
“Oh, hey, Amber.” He barely even glanced in her direction. “Yeah, so, I was at the servo and this bloke turns up in a white Tesla.” Grubby’s eyes went wide. “Like super expensive. Hundred K at least.”
Beside Amber, Vaughan sat up, slowly waking.
“And this bloke gets out and he’s looking around everywhere and stuff and eventually he comes in and he’s like ‘Where is your charging station?’ Right? And me and Mick just laugh at him. Good luck finding one round here. Charging station. What a fricken goose.”
Vaughan nodded, not quite into the story and not nearly as outraged as Amber would have liked either.
“Anyway, he gets back in his Tesla and takes off, tyres squealing.”
“There’s a charging station in Port Simmons.”
“I know, but what
if he doesn’t make it? That’d be the funniest thing in the world! A broken down Tesla, no way to drive it, all cos the guy is too stupid to know we don’t have a charging station. Come on. You’ve gotta come see.”
Grubby hopped from foot to foot, unable to stay still. Vaughan climbed out of bed, looking fresh and relaxed as usual. It wasn’t fair. He always looked so good first thing in the morning.
“Didn’t you say he left?”
“He left the servo. He went to her place.” Grubby pointed at Amber. “The cabins. Good luck finding a charging station there.”
Vaughan grabbed a shirt from the floor. The same one he was wearing yesterday.
“Wait till ya see this bloke. Everything matches. White suit, white Tesla. Even his hair is white. Not blonde or grey. White.” He turned to Amber. “Come on. You gotta get up. Let’s go see.”
“Grubby…” she said, not moving.
“What?”
Only then did Grubby twig Amber was in bed. His brain only able to focus on one thing and so caught up in his Tesla story it hadn’t occurred to him until that moment what Amber might or might not be wearing under the sheet. A slimy half-smile curled across his lips.
“Come on, get up…” he said, not going anywhere.
Amber was quite happy to climb out of bed dressed as she was. Of course, if she did, she would have to kill Grubby, which all things considered might not be a bad result. He would die too happy though, between seeing Amber nearly naked and the Tesla.
Vaughan laughed. “Come on, Grubs. Out. Let’s give the lady some privacy.”
Grubby appeared genuinely disappointed, as though there was some sort of other possible eventuality.
Vaughan grinned at Amber like this was all good fun. Still no anger at Grubby or more than a token desire to protect her honour.
The door to the cabin shut behind them. Amber didn’t move for a good few minutes. She wasn’t stupid. Knowing him, Grubby would make some excuse to come back in if Amber was getting changed. Who knew if Vaughan would stop him. Finally, she decided it was safe. She threw off the sheet. The door opened. Amber froze. Just Vaughan.
“Come on, slowcoach,” he said.
She sent a cold, unimpressed snarl his way.
“Hey, you know who this is, don’t you? The guy with the white hair?”