Trapped (Bullied Book 4) (Bullied Series)

by Vera Hollins

  I stopped close to him, but not too close. “A prison?”

  His eyes locked on mine, showing me his pain. “Yes. A prison that keeps me stuck in my past.”

  His words resonated within me, and I just stood there watching him as he stared off into the distance, allowing me to see the myriad of emotions that coursed over his face.

  But then, realizing he’d left the door to his world open, he put another mask on.

  I cleared my throat and went over to the railing. “I’m sorry about your parents,” I said to break the silence. “They aren’t fair.”

  “Don’t be. They were never parents to begin with.”

  I looked at him over my shoulder. “I don’t understand. It sounds like you’ve accepted it.”

  His gaze was directed at the sky. “I did, a long time ago. I don’t really want to talk about my parents.”

  I nodded and looked at the pond. The fallen leaves decorated its moon-kissed surface in an enthralling pattern. It was magical and peaceful, and if the circumstances had been any different, I’d have considered this moment romantic. I closed my eyes and let myself imagine it. I let myself imagine things were different; Blake would embrace me from behind and I would sink into his body.

  I could almost feel him behind me, and I opened my eyes, filled with a crushing and almost unbearable longing. Dog footsteps disturbed my reverie, and I turned my head to find a Rottweiler right next to me.

  I raised my eyebrows. Where had this fella come from? He darted his tongue out and wagged his tail, before he sat down in a pose that told me he was waiting for me to pet him. I sat on my haunches.

  “Hello,” I cooed as I stroked the fur between his ears. “You’re such a good boy—or girl.” I grinned over my shoulder at Blake.

  “That’s a first,” he said, standing up with his arms crossed over his chest, his brows raised. He stopped right behind me, and I whipped my head back, my heart doing a furious dance in my chest. He was too close!

  “What?” I asked, hoping I didn’t sound as flustered as I felt.

  “That Badass likes someone other than me.”

  I laughed and met his gaze over my shoulder. “You named your dog Badass?”

  His face remained impassive. “He does a good job at scaring people away.”

  “This dog right here? He’s a sweet baby! Look at him! All ready for cuddles.” I shifted onto my knees and leaned toward him, petting his head and neck with both hands.

  “As I said, you’re the only person who’s gotten to see him like this besides me.”

  “I guess that’s because animals love me for some reason.”

  “I’m not surprised,” he said incredibly gently, causing my stomach to backflip. I could feel his eyes on me, but I dared not look at him and see the expression on his face.

  I giggled when Badass licked my hand. “You like this? Oh, yes you do. Yes you do.” I rubbed his neck and head, enjoying this as much as him. I just loved cuddling pets.

  Blake shifted to my side, and when I glanced at him, the fierce look in his eyes brought color to my face. It was like he was entranced by me, and it was so intense I grew all shy. I bent my head so my hair could hide me from his gaze, every part of me hot.

  “Why doesn’t he like anyone?” I asked under my breath.

  “He was beaten and hanging on for dear life when I found him on the street. I took him to the emergency vet for surgery and decided to keep him if he survived. He recovered physically, but the beating left him traumatized enough not to let anyone close to him.”

  My chest filled with sympathy for Badass, and I wished I could do anything to remove his pain and help him regain trust in people. At the same time, Blake’s words struck a chord in me because it was like this wasn’t only about Badass. It felt like Blake could relate to Badass more than it might seem.

  “I’m sorry to hear that,” I said quietly as I caressed Badass’s ears. At least he had Blake, who’d taken him in and took care of him. I could feel myself melting at this fact, falling more for the side of Blake he hid from the world.

  Blake crouched next to me, and his fragrance hit me like a heavy gust of wind, robbing me of breath. He reached out to pet Badass’s back, and our hands brushed against each other. A zapping sensation coursed through my arm. I retracted my hand like I’d been nipped by fire, unable to hide how much he affected me.

  He looked at me. “Why did you come here?”

  I glanced away from him. “You know why. My parents and I were invited—”

  “You could’ve refused to come. You should’ve refused.”

  I dug my nails into my palm, sliced with cold and hurt. The previous night had shoved my illusions away, making it obvious that he and I would never work. Yet I was still hurt by his words.

  “And miss your warm welcome?” I stood up. “Don’t worry, Blake. I assure you this is the last time I step into your house.”

  He rose to his feet and folded his arms over his chest. “You don’t get it.” He ran his hand through his hair. “It’s getting harder for me to be near you when we can’t be together.”

  He took a step closer to me, and the distance between us became just a space that begged to be reduced to nothing. I was trembling, divided between wanting him and the same old hesitation.

  “You have no idea what I want to do to you.” He threaded his fingers through my hair, and a sweet ache suffused my chest. “But it wouldn’t lead us anywhere.”

  I crossed my arms and glanced at Badass, who didn’t move from his spot as he watched our exchange. “Right. Because of your promise of revenge.”

  “Yes.”

  “Promise to who?”

  He dropped his hand. His eyes regained their previous hard edge. “Jessica,” he growled.

  “To who?” I repeated, intent on getting to the bottom of this.

  He looked away. “I can’t tell you.”

  I grabbed the railing, tears pricking my eyes. He had no reason to confide in me; however, it hurt so much. I closed my eyes.

  “I can ask you what your revenge is for and why you’re so hellbent on it, but you’ll deny me those answers too, right?”

  It took him some time to respond. “Yes.”

  I took a deep breath. The sky was getting cloudy, the lights of the stars diminishing little by little. Icy fear and pain fenced my world.

  “That’s okay,” I said, bracing myself for what was about to happen. “Because I think I already know.”

  He was quiet behind me. Too quiet. And then he said in a strained voice, “What do you mean?”

  I turned around. “It’s about Emma, right?”

  His bewildered look told me everything I needed to know. “How did you…?”

  I was right. His revenge was about Emma and their kidnapping. Pain unlike anything before hit my chest.

  I forced myself to maintain eye contact. “Last Saturday, your parents invited my family to your house for dinner.”

  He frowned. “That was your family?”

  “Yes.”

  I clasped my shaky hands together, feeling too small. My throat constricted, rebelling against the words that were about to come out, but I had to push them out and come clean.

  “I had to use the bathroom, so the maid took me to the one on your floor. Being so close to your room…I got curious. You weren’t home so I…I went inside.”

  He winced. “You did what?”

  I recoiled and pressed myself against the railing. Badass stood up to his feet, sensing something was wrong.

  “What did you do in my room?”

  I stared at my feet, ashamed of myself. “I went to your desk. I saw some photos sticking out of the manila folder along with the ‘Never forget’ note and the photo of Emma and you.”

  His face twisted with a mix of emotions: incredulity, confusion, anger, and then a silent fury that was more tangible with each passing second. My heart took off at a gallop.

  “I was going to leave then, I swear, but I accidentally bumped
into the mouse, and your laptop screen lit up…there was a video in an open folder—”

  “You accidentally bumped into the mouse,” he stated flatly.

  “Y-Yes.”

  “You sneaked into my room, looked through my stuff, and stumbled upon that video.”

  I could barely look at him. “Yes.”

  “Did you play it?”

  The familiar expression of hatred had returned to his face with a vengeance, and I gripped the railing behind me. “I…”

  “Did you?!” He got up in my face, slamming his hands against the railing on both sides of me. Badass whimpered.

  I bit into my lip so hard I thought I’d draw blood. “Yes. I’m so sorry. I—”

  He slammed his fist against the railing. “You had no right!” His scream pierced through the night, and I flinched. Badass let out another whimper, moving around us restlessly. “You had no fucking right!”

  Tears blurred my vision. “I know. I’m sorry.”

  “You know? You’re sorry?!” He hit his fist against the railing again, and I cried out when I saw blood flowing out of the ripped skin on his knuckles. Badass began barking.

  “Was that payback?! Did you do that to get back at me for everything I’ve done to you?”

  “No! No, it wasn’t like that.” I sniffed and brushed a tear from my cheek. “I admit I told myself I wanted to find something to use to my advantage, but that wasn’t it. I just wanted to find out more about you.”

  He glared at me with hatred that destroyed all the warmth his kisses and loving touches had created. “You wanted to… What the fuck is wrong with you? You had no right to go into my room and snoop around. You had no right to watch that video.”

  Tears started cascading down my cheeks uncontrollably. “I know that now. I really know that, and I regret doing it. Back then, when I saw that thumbnail—you tied up to that chair—I just couldn’t ignore it. I got so worried. But I know it was bad and stupid of me to do that. I’m so sorry.”

  Without thinking, I raised my hand and touched his shoulder to console him, but he flinched and stepped back, shoving my hand off his shoulder.

  “Don’t touch me!”

  He took a few more steps away from me, staring at me with disgust. I placed my hand over my mouth to stifle my cry. I wanted to dissolve into nothing. I was so stupid for digging into his past.

  The barking noise became almost unbearable, and Blake shouted at Badass, “Shut the fuck up!”

  The dog whimpered, tucking his tail between his legs, and scurried away.

  We fell into silence that was even more unbearable than the previous noise, and it took everything in me not to hightail it out of here. His gaze iced over.

  “Did you tell anyone about Emma or what you saw?”

  “No.” He looked like he didn’t trust me. “I swear to you I haven’t told anyone about Emma or the kidnapping, Blake.” I sniffed, my chest heavy. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you, and when I saw what happened—”

  “Don’t fucking say it. I don’t want to hear you say a word about it, because if you do, I swear you’ll regret ever meeting me.”

  I lowered my head. This time, I was unable to hide from him even behind the thick strands of my hair. My fingers were clutching the metal railing too tightly, and it hurt, but the physical pain couldn’t compare to what I felt inside. I was a sobbing mess. I tried hard to hold back my tears, but I couldn’t.

  I wished I could turn back time. I had thought I’d be ready to suffer the consequences, but I wasn’t, and it was hard seeing him look at me like this. Just like in the beginning.

  “I was such an idiot.” He let out a short chuckle. “And here I thought you were someone I could actually trust. I let myself believe maybe, maybe if our lives had been different, we could’ve been together.” He shook his head. “I should’ve never let you in.”

  I cried out. It was too much. His words, his hate, the distance between us…it was too much.

  “I want you to get out of here and never talk to me again.”

  I couldn’t look him in the eyes, scrambling away, but I halted when I noticed Daniela standing next to the pond. Her brows were tightly drawn together as she observed us with her arms crossed over her chest.

  “Blake? What is this commotion about?” she asked, shifting her gaze between Blake and me.

  I couldn’t stay there a second longer. I hurried away, blind with tears.

  I arrived at school with a heavy weight in my stomach on Monday morning. I’d spent all of Sunday locked up in my room crying, unable to get my mind off the betrayed look on Blake’s face. I’d effectively ruined my chances of getting him to trust me, and even though I knew I should just let it go, I couldn’t. I couldn’t be okay with how things had gone between us. I wished he could know I’d never wanted to hurt him with my foolish act. So I kept looking for him around school, feeling the burning need to apologize, or just explain myself.

  I didn’t see him before U.S. history. I’d thought I could try to talk to him then, but he entered the classroom right before the teacher arrived. He didn’t look in my direction even once as he headed for his seat, and my heart contorted so painfully.

  The teacher announced a pop quiz, and the classroom erupted in groans and sighs. My heart, however, sped up for a totally different reason. My hands started shaking when the students passed the papers back and I took them from the student in front of me. Slowly, I turned to give them to Blake.

  His eyes were on his desk as he reached out, much to my disappointment. But then our hands brushed, and his eyes flitted to mine. I inhaled sharply. There was pain in them, but it was mixed with something else—something that stirred me from the inside out. However, it was so fleeting I could’ve easily imagined it. His gaze hardened, and he snatched the quizzes away from me, dousing any warmth I’d felt.

  The teacher announced the start, but I couldn’t concentrate. I was getting jittery. It was torture sitting so close to him, being aware of his every move. Foolishly enough, I hoped our bodies would touch accidentally, my breath catching in my throat each time he leaned closer to me. But they didn’t, and that left me with an empty feeling that only grew stronger by the end of class. I could practically feel his hostility emanating toward me.

  My courage to apologize almost fizzled out when the bell rang. I picked up my stuff with trembling hands as I thought about what I could say to start a conversation, but he rushed out of his seat and the classroom before I could even call out to him.

  I sighed as I stood up and followed Marcus out. He was telling me something as we walked in the direction of Blake’s locker, but I wasn’t paying attention to him as I watched Blake open it.

  “Sorry, what did you say?”

  “I think I totally failed that quiz.”

  I pressed my books against my chest. “That’s too bad. I hope I didn’t. I answered all the questions, but I don’t know if I got them right.”

  “Ms. Gentry does this all the time. Will she ever get tired of it?”

  “I don’t think so.”

  His phone chimed, and he grinned when he looked at the screen. “It’s Kev.”

  I smiled. “Oh? What does he say?”

  “He’s waiting for me at my locker.”

  “You two are so cute.”

  Kev and Marcus were a couple now. They’d gone out on Sunday and started dating, and I couldn’t have been happier for them. It was hard to miss how Marcus’s eyes started glowing; all his worries disappeared as if nothing mattered in the world for him but Kevin. A dull pain pervaded my chest. It looked so easy—having someone who could bring you the sun when there was only rain. Someone who wouldn’t make your heart beat with pain and longing more intense than anything.

  His grin got bigger as he texted Kev back. “You think so?”

  My eyes moved over to Blake, who stood with his back turned to me as he rummaged through his locker. “Absolutely.”

  “It’s all
thanks to you,” Marcus said.

  “What do you mean?”

  “You told me to talk to Kevin. I didn’t have the guts to do it, but you helped me, so thank you for that.”

  Aww, he’s sweet. “No need to thank me. I just pushed you in the right direction a little, that’s all.”

  “Still, you’re like our Cupid or something.” I chuckled. “I’ll be going now. Can’t keep my man waiting.”

  My man. So, so cute.

  I winked at him. “Sure. We can’t let that happen.” He laughed, waving goodbye.

  My smile diminished as he disappeared down the hallway, my gaze shifting to Blake. Only a few feet separated us now as I neared the corner, but it could’ve been miles and it would’ve been the same. My pulse thrummed hard in my throat. This was my chance.

  But before I could approach him, some guy rounded the corner, and I bumped into him. The books he carried crashed to the ground, scattering all around.

  “Watch it,” he snarled as he pushed me away, which attracted everyone’s attention.

  I barely managed to catch myself before I fell, supporting myself against the locker.

  He hovered above me. “Why don’t you look where you’re going? Look what you’ve done!” He pointed at the books.

  I didn’t get to answer him because Blake rushed over and shoved him against the lockers, leaving me speechless.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” Blake hissed, grabbing the collar of his shirt. My pulse increased rapidly.

  He’s jumping in to help me.

  “Let me go, man.” He fought to set himself free, but Blake was much stronger than him.

  Blake’s fingers tightened around his collar. “I asked, what do you think you’re doing?”

  The guy cursed into his chin. “You saw it. That stupid bitch didn’t watch where—”

  “The fuck did you just say?” Blake slammed him harder against the locker, and the guy’s head collided hard with the metal.

  He cried out. “Hey, I—”

  Blake got in his face. “You don’t get to call her that. You don’t get to even touch her. Got it?” My heart leapt in my chest at hearing his words. The guy didn’t reply immediately, and Blake pressed his arm against his throat. “Got it?!”