The Abalone Shell

by Suzie O'Connell

  “Is that offer to sleep on the couch still open for Liam and me?” Gideon asked.

  “Yes. Of course.”

  “Then why don’t I give him our hotel room? We’ve got it for three nights.”

  “Just so long as you make sure he pays for it.”

  “Yeah, I’m not that big a sucker, Hope.”

  She shot her cousin an almost-playful look—one brow and the corners of her mouth lifted. At least Dan’s arrival hadn’t totally ruined her night. Yet.

  “At least not where Dan is concerned,” Gideon added. “But I’m learning to be less of a sucker where Hannah is concerned, too.”

  “Glad to hear it. Can I have your hotel key? And what room number?”

  Gideon dug the key out of his pocket and handed it over. “Room number four at the Seacrest Inn.”

  “Would you like me to take Daphne inside… or would it be better if I waited in the car until your ex is gone?” Owen asked.

  She flashed him a grateful smile. “In the car, if you wouldn’t mind.”

  Owen nodded. “One less complication.”

  “Thank you.”

  She inhaled deeply and held it for a count of ten, and then let it out as she stepped out of her car, focusing on the warmth clinging to her shoulder from where Owen’s hand had rested. It didn’t last long enough, and when she tapped on the driver’s side window of her ex-husband’s truck, her scowl was firmly back in place and the lightheartedness of the evening was fading fast. He jerked upright at her knock; he must’ve been snoozing. It was nearly midnight, after all.

  “What are you doing here, Dan?” she asked as soon as he opened the door and rose to his feet.

  “I came to see my daughter. I said I was coming.”

  “Yes… at the end of the month. And you were supposed to give me enough time to make reservations for you.”

  He stuffed his hands in his jeans’ pockets and stared at the ground. Narrowing her eyes, she studied him and wondered if Gideon was right. Was his spur-of-the-moment trip just that or had he intentionally come on one of the busiest tourist nights of the year for Sea Glass Cove to guilt her into letting him stay in the cottage with her?

  It seemed impossible, but something had changed between them. She had changed. She looked at him from a wholly new perspective, unfiltered by fifteen years of marriage and the love she’d once felt for him. She was able to view him and their entire relationship with an objective eye, and his manipulations—whether they were intentional or not—were as clear as the mountain streams near the home they’d shared in Montana. She probably had Owen to thank for that.

  The thick lumberjack beard, dark hair, and hazel eyes and the stalky, powerful body attached to them were as familiar as her own reflection, but she felt like she was looking at someone she’d met only a handful of times. There was a distance between them that hadn’t been there at any point in their relationship, and despite her annoyance, there was enough of her that still cared for him and worried about him that it hurt—a deep ache that might never go away.

  “How long have you been here?” she asked, forcing her attention back to the surface.

  “A few hours. Where have you been?”

  “It’s the summer solstice. We were down on the beach with the rest of the town.”

  “Where’s Daphne?”

  “Asleep in the car.”

  “Can I see her?”

  “In the morning,” Hope replied, surprised by how fast and firmly the response came out. “If you had called ahead, I would’ve been happy to make sure she stayed awake for you, but since you didn’t, I’m not going to wake her up. She’s had a very busy day, and she’s exhausted.”

  “Hope….”

  “Do you have a place to stay? Or were you planning to sleep in your truck?”

  “I tried to get a room for the night, but they’re all booked.”

  She dangled Gideon’s hotel key in front of him.

  “How did you…?”

  “Gideon’s here, and he’s kindly agreed to sleep on the couch and let you have his room at the Seacrest Inn—room number four. You remember how to find the Seacrest, right? It’s at the bottom of the hill before you get to town, first building on Sea Glass Drive.”

  “I remember where it is, but why don’t I sleep on the couch instead? I’d hate to inconvenience your cousin.”

  “You can either accept the offer of the hotel room or sleep in your truck. But you won’t be staying in the cottage with me.”

  He regarded her with eyes wide, and for a minute as he stared at her in disbelief, she worried he would try to convince her to change her mind. Then he took the key. He was either too tired or too stunned to argue, or maybe it was apparent she wasn’t going to back down. All of the above, most likely.

  “You’ll need to stop in to the office,” she continued, “and let them know you’re taking the room instead of Gideon.”

  A car door opened behind her, and she glanced over her shoulder to see Gideon stepping out. He was trying hard not to be obvious, but only a blind man would miss the glances he shot her way as he leaned into the back seat to lift his sleeping son out of the car. It was a barely disguised offer of escape—an excuse for Hope to bid her ex-husband goodnight.

  She didn’t hesitate to take it.

  “I’ll bring Daphne down first thing in the morning, and you can spend however many days you need with her. I won’t intrude. Gideon reserved the room for three nights, but that should give you time to make arrangements if you want to stay longer.”

  “Three nights will be plenty for now. I only took a few days off work.”

  “All right then. We’ll see you in the morning.”

  Dan hesitated, gave Hope one last, pleading look, and slid back in behind the steering wheel.

  She waited until his taillights had disappeared before she let out a breath and walked back to her car. With her ex gone, the fight-or-flight rush of adrenaline he had a talent for triggering subsided, leaving her shaky and drained.

  “I hate to ask, but could you carry Daphne in, Owen? I’m not sure I can lift her right at this moment.”

  “I’d be happy to.”

  The way he said it with that gentleness in his voice told her he truly was happy to help. Because he seemed to need the paternal fulfillment as much as she needed his assistance, she let him settle Daphne in bed while she pulled out her daughter’s nightgown. He bent over to kiss the girl’s forehead, habitually, and Hope’s chest tightened. Even after three years, the habits and instincts were as strong as ever, and she could only imagine how much he missed even the simple rituals like putting his child to bed. She watched him with fascination, like she often did.

  When he asked where the linens were so he could help Gideon and Liam get settled on the couches downstairs, her fond gaze turned into a disbelieving stare, and she tilted her head to the side.

  “What?” he asked, suddenly and endearingly self-conscious.

  “You are such a breath of fresh air, Owen. I’m sorry if I sometimes don’t comprehend how effortlessly giving you are. Honestly, I can’t. I’ve spent fifteen years having to drag that kind of helpfulness out of my ex, and it’s going to be a hard habit to break.”

  “It’s the only way I know how to be.” His expression softened immediately, and though he didn’t say it, she got the message. You deserve so much better than you had.

  “I’m getting that. I’m just not used to it. But believe me, I do appreciate it even if I still can’t quite believe it’s real.”

  “Put your daughter to bed,” he whispered and leaned down to kiss her cheek, “and if you have any energy left after that, we can talk out on the deck for a bit.”

  Nodding, she turned to her daughter as he left the room. She removed Daphne’s sandy shoes. Her clothes were a bit trickier, but it was a testament to how tired the girl was that she stirred only briefly enough to mumble incomprehensible complaints and help Hope pull the Elsa and Anna nightgown over her head. Then she was out
cold again, and Hope tucked her in, kissed her forehead, and tiptoed out of the room. She felt a little guilty for not even trying to get Daphne to brush her teeth, but she knew her daughter well enough to know there would be no waking that girl until morning.

  Downstairs, Owen and Gideon already had the couches made up and Liam tucked in and as dead-to-the-world asleep as Daphne. Hope hugged her cousin tightly.

  “Thank you again,” she whispered.

  “My pleasure,” he replied. “The couch might not be as comfortable as a hotel bed, but the cottage is definitely better… and the look on Dan’s face when you didn’t give in was the best of all.”

  “As a precaution, you might want to call down to the Seacrest and let them know of the change of occupant in room number four and—”

  “I already did that while we were waiting in the car.”

  She tightened her arms around him for a moment more. Then she let him go and stepped outside with Owen so Gideon could get ready for bed. They wandered over to the deck railing, and she pulled his arms around her, chilled despite the warmth enduring into the night. Below them, the tide had turned and was crawling its way back toward the dunes, but many dozens of fires still flickered like citrine jewels.

  “Are you all right?” Owen asked softly.

  “I’m not sure what I am, but I’m going to count tonight as a win because I was able to say no to him without hesitating. That’s a step in the right direction for me.”

  “But he still took away some of your enjoyment of tonight.”

  “He took away a lot of it. Too much.”

  “I can fix that.”

  She smiled. Because she believed he could.

  “You see all those glittering fires?” he asked. “Remember how much fun we had tonight sitting by ours?”

  “Mmm-hmm.”

  “Good. Hold on to that feeling until you don’t have to hold on to it. Until that feeling stays on its own.”

  She kept her gaze focused on the fires and concentrated on her breathing—slow and deep, in and out. The weight of his arms around her was comforting, and as soon as her mind latched onto that, there was no forcing her attention back to the fires. But that was okay. She was hyper aware of her body pressed to his, and that awareness drew her focus away from thoughts of her ex and his penchant for disrupting her happiness. As she consciously noted the planes of Owen’s body and the heat where they touched, the tension left her and she relaxed into him.

  “Better?” he whispered.

  “Much.” She sighed, genuinely content again. “Your Sam was a lucky woman.”

  “I like to think we were both lucky.” He lowered his head and kissed the curve of her neck. “And I’d like to think that same luck might be smiling on me again.”

  She turned her face up to his, and the adoration in his eyes melted her heart. “I’d like to think that, too. Owen?”

  “Hmm?”

  “Would it be too much to ask to spend the next couple nights at your place while Daphne’s with her dad? Not tonight but tomorrow night and the night after? Then Gideon and Liam could have the cottage and be more comfortable. I feel like I owe it to them.”

  “I doubt they think that. And no, it’s not too much to ask. I was going to offer, but I wasn’t sure you were ready for that.”

  She swiveled in his arms, and he knitted his hands together behind the small of her back. Standing on her toes, she kissed him long but gently. “I didn’t know if I was or not, either, until just now. But now I know I’m ready for it. Just so I know our boundaries, is sex on or off the table?”

  He chuckled and pressed his forehead to hers. “Why don’t we just keep going the way we are and see what happens? One step at a time, darling.” He yawned, and with reluctance, he released her. “See you tomorrow?”

  “Can’t wait.”

  Ten

  “Are you sure you don’t want to come with us, Hope? I don’t mind waiting until you get back from dropping Daph off with Dan.”

  Hope finished double-checking Daphne’s overnight bags, set them by the front door, and turned to her cousin. “I’m sure. I should really get some writing done today while I don’t have Daphne underfoot. I’ve done hardly any writing since we’ve been here.”

  “Having too much fun with Owen, huh?”

  “That… and I’ve been unwinding. I thought I was almost back to a place where I can focus on my stories again.”

  “And then Dan showed up and ruined it like he always does.”

  She nodded. “But I can’t let him do it this time. I have to get this book finished. I promise we’ll all do something together tonight, though. Maybe have dinner together if you boys are back from your adventure in time.”

  “By ‘all’, I assume you mean Owen, too.”

  “If that’s all right with you.”

  Gideon grinned. “You bet it’s all right. You have fun writing.”

  “Always do when it flows. And you boys have fun… doing whatever you end up doing.”

  “I was thinking of heading down the coast, maybe showing Liam Devil’s Punchbowl, the Yaquina Head lighthouse, and maybe the Oregon Coast Aquarium.”

  “You think you’re going to have time to do all that and make it back in time for dinner? Or should we plan for dinner tomorrow night?” She growled. “I’m really sorry Dan showed up like this. I don’t like that Daphne’s missing out on time with you guys. She doesn’t get to see you often enough as it is.”

  “Dan showing up isn’t your fault, cuz. And we’ll be back in time for dinner tonight. Maybe we’ll just go to the aquarium. Liam’ll probably enjoy that more, anyhow. What time do you want us back?”

  “Six-thirty or seven? Owen won’t close his gallery until five.”

  “Six-thirty it is then.”

  Gideon left the living room to check on their kids, who were sitting out on the deck waiting for the adults. It was sunny now, but out over the ocean, clouds were gathering and beginning the march toward the coast. The streak of exquisitely clear weather she had been enjoying since she and Daphne had arrived was about to end. The forecasters called for several days of steady rain and blustery winds, and while she was bummed for Gideon and Liam, the prospect of indoor, rainy day activities with Owen was intriguing. What would they discover about each other when they weren’t distracted by the beauty outside and didn’t have Daphne as a barrier or as glue?

  She sighed. There was nothing left to delay the inevitable, and she picked up Daphne’s bags, plucked her keys off the dining room table, and headed out the door. As keen as she was for some alone time with Owen, she was not looking forward to being separated from her daughter.

  “Come on, Daph,” she said, walking over to her little girl. “It’s time to go. Your dad is waiting, and I’m sure he’s got some fun plans for the two of you.”

  “See ya, Liam.”

  The cousins embraced, and Hope wished Gideon and Liam could stay longer, that they wouldn’t be heading out before Daphne returned to the cottage. One evening together, even as fun as it had been, wasn’t enough to last them the months between now and their next visit.

  She was surprised to find Dan sitting in the wicker chair on the small deck of his ocean-facing hotel room when she and Daphne pulled up in front of the Seacrest. It was still early yet—just past eight—and in the last few years as the depression triggered by his cycle of failures had gotten the best of him, it had been a struggle for him to rise before ten on his days off. He waved pleasantly as they pulled up, and as soon as Hope parked her car beside his truck, Daphne threw open her door and was out of the vehicle and running up the path toward her father.

  “Hi, Daddy!”

  “Hi, munchkin.” As Hope approached with Daphne’s bags slung over her shoulder, Dan smiled at her. “Good morning.”

  “Good morning,” she replied automatically and set her daughter’s bags on the porch. “The weather won’t hold long, so I won’t keep you two. Everything she needs is in her bags, and you have my number.�
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  “Why don’t you stay a minute or two?” he asked.

  “I can’t. I need to get to work.”

  “Still working all the time, huh?”

  Hope frowned. “No, actually. I’ve done very little work since we’ve been here, which is why I need to get some writing done while you have Daphne.”

  “So it’s a good thing I showed up when I did.”

  “No, it really isn’t. Not without notice. Showing up like this is always stressful for me and for Daphne, Dan, and I can’t keep dropping my life for your every whim. I won’t.”

  “Please don’t fight again,” Daphne said quietly. “I hate the fighting.”

  “We’re not going to fight, baby girl. Give me a hug, and I’ll get out of here so you and your dad can get your adventures started.” Hope opened her arms, and Daphne launched herself into them.

  “Why can’t you come with us?” the little girl whispered.

  “Because it’s your daddy’s turn to spoil you.”

  “But how come we can’t all do stuff together like you and me and Owen do?”

  Hope sighed and squeezed her daughter tightly, wishing she didn’t have to let go and knowing it was futile to think she could soak up enough love in a few moments to last her until she picked her daughter up in two days.

  “Someday you’ll understand, baby girl. For now, have a good time with your dad and be on your best behavior for him, okay? And you and I and Owen will do something together when I pick you up day after tomorrow. Deal?”

  “Deal. I love you.”

  “I love you, too, Daph. More than anything else in this world. You know my phone number. Please call me tonight, okay? I want to hear all about your day.”

  Daphne nodded solemnly.

  Reluctantly, Hope released her. “You heard me, young lady. You be a good girl.”

  “I will, Mom.”

  “She’s always a good girl,” Dan said.

  “I know, but it doesn’t hurt to remind her. You two have fun.”

  Her eyes prickled, and she leaned down to kiss her daughter’s cheek before turning quickly away before the tears started falling. This wasn’t the first time since the divorce that she’d walked away from them, and so far, it wasn’t getting any easier. It wasn’t just the separation from her daughter that ripped the wounds in her heart open all over again; it was the reminder that the family she’d fought so long to keep together was broken and that, however necessary the decision, she’d been the one to make that final, irrevocable break.