Which wouldn’t be too hard considering he wanted nothing more than to spend every waking second with her, especially now that she was laid up on bed rest. But as a doctor himself he knew quite well that there were a whole host of ways to pass the time without getting bored. That’s why he had a special gift for her today.
Mandy smirked when he showed up at her condo with the shiny new wheelchair in tow. “What’s that for?”
“For you, silly.”
“Oh, so now I’m silly?” She stuck her tongue out at him, but allowed him to help her get situated in the wide, leather seat.
“I thought we could go for a walk... or a roll as the case may be.”
She chuckled. “Walk and roll, huh? You know your puns are terrible?”
“Seeing as you can’t get away.” He tipped her chair back so that she was even more unbalanced than before, and she smiled up at him with pure joy. He had to keep talking in order to avoid kissing her. Would he eventually run out of ways to distract himself from her luscious mouth? “I guess you’re stuck with me and my corny puns. Now let’s go.”
Mandy shifted her weight from one side of her body to the other with a playful wiggle. “I feel like a little old lady in this thing,” she quipped.
“Then you fit right in here, don’t you? Should I call you Mrs. Rockwell?”
“Mrs. Ha! Like that’ll ever happen.” He couldn’t see her face as he walked, pushing her chair, but he had a feeling Mandy was rolling her eyes. Maybe even sticking out her tongue.
Luke had to bite his tongue rather than jumping in with another flirtatious overture. But, oh, how great it would be to make her his little old lady, his Mrs. Ward.
“Is it just me, or is it ridiculously hot out here?” Mandy fanned herself by pumping the collar of her T-shirt as they continued to make their way down the manicured sidewalk. “Makes me miss Alaska. Was it ever this hot in New York?”
“You complain now, but trust me. Months of being stuck indoors is going to change your tune. To answer your question though, yeah, it’s hot. So let’s grab some takeout and a movie and go back inside. Good?”
“Great. Sounds like the perfect way to pass the afternoon.”
“Yup, it’s just what the doctor ordered.” He couldn’t stop himself from laughing at his own joke, but luckily she joined in.
“Aargh, again with the puns? Can this thing go any faster?” Mandy giggled as she tried to help move her chair by pushing at the large side wheels.
“Hardy har har. Slow your roll, we’re almost there. It’s just down the next…” His words trailed off as he scanned the block ahead, but couldn’t find what he was searching for.
“What?” She twisted in her chair to face him, quirked an eyebrow.
“The video store, it’s boarded up. But Mrs. Blue told me that…”
“You and I both know that old Mrs. Blue is just a touch senile. I’m sure that store’s been closed down for months, if not years. Who rents videos from a store these days anyway?”
“Not us apparently. Netflix?”
“Sure, and can we order a pizza? I could really go for some yummy, greasy pepperoni right about now.”
And so it was decided. They’d have dinner and a movie, but not a date. Not a date, not a date… Maybe if he kept reminding himself of that fact, it would start to feel true.
By the time the pizza arrived, they’d settled on a sci-fi action flick starring some hotshot actor that—funnily enough—actually looked quite a bit like Luke. He swore he didn’t see it, but Mandy could easily picture Luke dodging blasters and captaining starships in place of the leading man.
Everything was going well enough, until…
Mandy gasped and buried her face in her hands. “Wait, did he just die?” she mumbled through a mask of fingers.
“Well, yeah, but he saved all the people on board the ship, so he’s a hero.”
She lowered her hands from her face, grabbed the remote, and mashed the stop button. “Hero or not, he still died. Without getting to meet his baby.”
“Uh-oh…”
“How could they do that to him? Don’t they know about the baby? Don’t they know he’ll need… She’ll need…” And then it all hit her at once. The fact that her baby would never meet its father either, but also wouldn’t have the comfort of knowing said father had died a hero. No, he’d chosen to leave—well, to let her leave. He didn’t want anything more to do with her or their baby.
Having lost her own father far too young, Mandy at least knew he’d have been there for her if he could. And she’d had a great strong male role model in her grandfather Rip who had raised her alongside Deborah when the accident had claimed her parents’ lives. But Mandy’s baby wouldn’t have any of that. It would only have her—weak, screw-up her—and how could that ever be enough?
Tears spilled onto her cheeks and she let out a keening wail, something she hadn’t done since childhood.
“Mandy, it’s okay! It’s just a story. It’s not real.” Luke edged closer to her on the couch and flung an arm over her shoulders.
“But the baby will never know its dad. He doesn’t even have a chance.”
“Hey, believe me. Captain Kirk turns out just fine.”
“B-b-but my baby doesn’t have… He didn’t want…”
“Shh, shh, I understand. Look at me.” His voice was soft, inviting, but as much as she needed his comfort, Mandy didn’t want Luke to see her like this. Breakdowns were meant to be private affairs, not public spectacles.
She turned away and mumbled, “No, I’m puffy and bloated and now I have snot running down my face.”
“So what?” He pushed a box of Kleenex her way, and she took one to swipe at her face.
“Mandy, please. Look at me,” Luke coaxed.
But Mandy shook her head and continued to stare at the wall on the opposite side of the room. “I can’t.”
“Why not?”
She took a deep breath and then let it all out. As she talked, Luke tried to interrupt with kind words, but she was on a roll now and couldn’t be stopped. “I’m just a stupid, stupid girl with stupid, stupid dreams. I’m going to single-handedly ruin this baby’s life.”
Luke got off the couch and kneeled before her, but still she wouldn’t look at him as she continued her tirade.
“I’ve wasted too much time working toward the stupid bakery, thinking I ever had a chance. I’m impulsive, reckless, ugly. I’m not worth anyth—”
He grabbed her face with both hands, stopping her midsentence.
“Luke, what are you—?”
But before she could finish her question, he brought his mouth to hers in a brilliant explosion of heat and need.
That whole fireworks cliché? Totally true.
Chapter 10
Kissing Luke!
She was actually kissing Luke, and it felt amazing. She should have pulled away, should’ve reminded him that they were just friends—but despite what she should do, she just couldn’t bring herself to do it.
Her emotions had run away with her, but falling into Luke’s embrace helped her to still herself once again. Because their kiss just felt so…
Right.
That was the only word for it. And even though all the relationships that had come before had fizzled out—or even ended in disaster—maybe this one would be different. Was she a fool for hoping, for believing that something in her life might actually work out for once?
After all, he had initiated the kiss. So did that mean he was willing to overlook all the extra baggage she came with? As a soon-to-be single mom she wasn’t exactly traveling light, either.
He’d chosen to trust her with his secret and had never pressed her to share more of her past than she willingly offered. He made her smile, made her put all her worries aside whenever he took her in his arms. And Deborah and Charlie could sense how much Luke meant to her despite Mandy’s incessant denial. Charlie even picked up on her crush despite being thousands of miles away.
It
had all added up to this moment right now. She could either deepen their kiss, allow herself to fall face forward into the very real possibility of love—or she could pull away, pretend it never happened, remind Luke that they were really better off as friends, point out that he was way too good for her, besides…
Mandy brought her hands up to Luke’s shoulders and gently pushed him away.
“I’m sorry,” he said reflexively. His handsome features pressed into a frown.
“Don’t be.” Mandy swung her legs up onto the couch and repositioned herself into a semi-reclined position. “I just wanted to get more comfortable, before…” She giggled nervously and silently cursed herself. Why couldn’t act sexy for once, instead of her usual silly and girlish self?
“Come here,” she said, opening her arms to invite him in for a close, hot cuddle.
He gave her a delicious smile and delicately lowered his body onto hers, kissing her forehead and each cheek before bringing his mouth back to hers. He worked his strong hands through her hair, behind her back, up her torso.
Suddenly he pulled away, and it took Mandy a second to realize why.
The baby.
The baby had kicked and apparently put an end to their perfect moment—and possibly to the start of their budding romance as well.
He knew it was wrong, that he shouldn’t have kissed Mandy. But she’d kept putting herself down, kept pressing down that dark path of what-ifs and if-onlys. Trying to calm her worried mind while also working to keep his romantic urges at bay had proven far too difficult a task, so he’d used one problem to solve the other.
And it had been great, until…
Kick!
The baby awakened his guilty conscience once more, reminded him that he didn’t deserve good things in his life—and that he least of all deserved a wonderful woman like Mandy. His libido now in check once again, his logical brain woke back up, too.
“We shouldn’t have… It’s too much exertion for the baby, for you. You’re supposed to take it easy. That’s the whole point of bed rest. I shouldn’t have made you—”
“You didn’t make me do anything. I wanted to. And if you’re really worried, we can slow down. Be gentler.”
Oh, how he wanted to return to her embrace, to accept her sweet kisses, her warmth, and whatever else she wanted to offer. But…
“I think we’ve had enough excitement for today. Let’s get you to bed.”
“Luke, it’s only seven o’clock.” She stuck out her lower lip in an adorably sexy pout.
“Trust me, you need your rest. But don’t worry, we can watch the rest of the movie from your bed. That is, if you don’t mind having me join you.”
“Ohhh, sure. Let’s move this to the bedroom.” She giggled as he helped her to her feet and scooped up the greasy pizza box and roll of paper towels they were using in lieu of napkins.
“To sleep,” he reminded her with what he hoped was a stern look.
“To sleep,” she echoed, and though she put up a fight, she’d drifted off before the movie could even reach the end credits.
Luke stayed with her the whole time, enjoying the feel of her cheek pressed up against his chest. It felt so… right.
But feelings could be deceiving—something he knew better than anyone.
Chapter 11
Mandy woke up the next morning feeling as if she’d been transported to an entirely different planet—one on which anything was possible, where she could have her dream, her family, even love. The possibilities felt endless. Life felt good, as if somehow her twisted path had led her to exactly where she needed to be. Here in Abilene with her grandmother, her baby, her new boyfriend.
Oh my Gosh! Luke is my boyfriend! A shiver of delight ran through her at that last thought. Everything had changed between them and for the better. He’d been the perfect gentleman and caretaker. They’d indulged in each other while also not allowing themselves to get carried away.
She’d done fast and furious. Slow and steady proved a welcome change, and honestly just what she needed at this point in her life anyway.
After all, how much stronger were her feelings for Luke since they’d taken the time to become friends first? True, they’d known each other for only a couple weeks; however, the amount of time they’d spent together in those two weeks amounted to at least a couple dozen dates worth of time. Perhaps that was the reason why she couldn’t think of him without feeling butterflies beat within her heart. The baby, too, seemed happier whenever her thoughts drifted toward Luke.
As exhausted as she still felt that morning, she couldn't wait to see Luke again, to kiss him, to look into his eyes and see the love that had already begun to take root within them.
“Knock, knock,” Deborah called from the other side of Mandy’s closed door.
“Come in!” Oh, she couldn’t wait to tell her grandma all about what had transpired the night before. Deborah would puff up like a rooster when she heard that she had been right all along, but Mandy wouldn’t mind—because she’d get to dish about Luke and their kiss and whatever came next for the two of them.
“I thought I heard you stirring in here,” Deborah said as she shuffled into the room and sat down at the edge of her granddaughter’s bed.
Mandy sat up and fluffed her pillows behind her. “Oh, Grandma! I have so much to tell you!”
“Something happened with Luke,” Deborah said with a knowing smile.
“Yes! How did you know?”
The old woman reached into the pocket of her oversized cardigan and fished out an envelope that simply said Mandy across its front. “This here is doctor writing if ever I saw it. I swear I had to study the thing for five whole minutes before I could even tell what it was supposed to say.”
Mandy squealed and hugged her grandmother tight.
“Well, I’ve been waiting all morning to find out what it says. Don’t keep me waiting a moment longer, darling.”
“Should I read it out loud?”
“Oh, heck yes.”
Mandy tore into the envelope and unfolded the letter, then cleared her throat, took a drink of water, held up a finger to indicate that she’d be just a moment.
Deborah burst out, “Enough with the theatrics. Are you going to read the thing or not?”
Mandy chuckled then cleared her throat one more time for good measure. “Okay, okay.” She held the letter close, sucking in the clean, masculine scent of Luke as she began to read his words, which thankfully had been typed in a clear and easy-to-read font. “My dearest Mandy…”
“A fine start! What next?”
“Grandma! Are you going to keep asking questions, or are you going to let me read it?”
Deborah shook her head and motioned for Mandy to continue.
“My dearest Mandy,” she began again. “Did you know that from the moment I first laid eyes on you, standing in that doorway and wearing that ridiculous apron, I knew you’d shown up in my life for a reason? I know that sounds incredibly arrogant, as if the very reason for your existence is so that your path could eventually cross mine, but, Mandy, I think we were both meant to find each other.”
“Heavens,” Deborah exclaimed. “If the whole doctoring thing falls through, seems someone has a backup career as a poet.”
Mandy’s grin was so wide her face had begun to hurt—the best kind of hurt, a happy one.
“You are amazing, beautiful, kind, and I’m so glad we met, but…”
Oh, no. Her voice caught as she continued to read. “But sometimes people are only meant to be in your life for a season. You’ve made me realize that I can’t run away from my problems, no matter how daunting they may seem. That’s why I had to go back to New York…”
Deborah placed a hand on Mandy’s knee and pushed herself onto her feet. “I’ll let you read the rest in private, and whenever you’re ready come to the kitchen, and I’ll make you the best dang breakfast you’ve had in your whole life. Deal?”
Mandy nodded silently and waited for Deborah to
latch the door behind her before she continued reading. A cascade of tears threatened to fall, making it all the more difficult to read Luke’s final words to her.
You’ve made me realize that I can’t run away from my problems, no matter how daunting they may seem. That’s why I had to go back to New York to face what I did. I hope you won’t be too mad at me for leaving. Regardless of your fears, you are one of the strongest people I’ve ever met. I know you’ll accomplish everything you set out to do, and I’m so sorry I won’t be there to see it all come to fruition. But I’ll think of you always with a smile on my face and love in my heart. Forever yours, Luke.
Luke sat at a large table by the window, taking long, slow sips from his cappuccino. As much as he hated what the Starbucksification of America had done to simple, reliable black coffee, he had to admit this particular blend of froth and foam really hit the spot. It even had a special added flavor that reminded him of Mandy’s cupcake frosting, the same delicious concoction she’d had him try on that very first afternoon they’d met.
Had it really only been two weeks ago? Somehow that afternoon seemed so far in the past he could barely glimpse it in the rearview mirror of his life—now when another object loomed much closer. The time had come to sit up straight, and face the future by facing his past. Was he really ready for this?
He took another sip to center himself and continued to wait.
He watched as a young mother tried to soothe her wailing baby long enough to place an order with the barista, and his thoughts drifted to Mandy once again. Soon she would be a single mother attempting to go about her life with a new baby in tow. She’d make a great mom, of that he was certain. Still he felt guilty about leaving her and Abilene behind so abruptly. For taking the coward’s way out and typing up a quick note to place in her mailbox before slinking off into the dawn.
But he also knew that he couldn’t bring himself to say goodbye to her in person. If she’d asked him to stay, he’d have done so without the slightest hesitation. Oh, it would be so easy to stay in Abilene forever, to make Mandy his wife, adopt her baby, make a life together. And he wanted all of that, but he knew better than to build a life on a cracked foundation.
The Alaska Sunrise Romances: A 9-Book Sweet Romance Collection Page 33