First Kiss

by Bernadette Marie

  “Why don’t I just plan to meet you in the park around twelve-fifteen.”

  “Sure.”

  Olivia was content with the arrangement. Gage was indeed a lucky man, she thought as she remembered Cade’s words from the day before. He was lucky to have people who cared about him.

  The town was still quiet when she drove down Main Street and headed toward the bank. Usually, she’d use her Saturdays at the bank to catch up on her work. Other than the few people who didn’t make it to the bank on Friday with their paychecks or the ranchers who came in from beyond the city limits, there wasn’t a lot of banking traffic.

  Earl, the night guard, opened the door for her, and she’d almost made it in to her office before Kat burst through the door behind her, nearly knocking Earl over on her way.

  “Oh, do I have something hot to tell.”

  Olivia closed her eyes and sucked in a breath. This was the only part of small town she didn’t like. “What’s that?”

  “Cade Carter is in jail.”

  Olivia felt the blood drain from her face, and she forced herself to concentrate. “What? Why?”

  “Guess he headed into town last night and got drunk. There were enough fans around for a bit to talk football, so he bought a few rounds. Then he threw Buck into the jukebox.”

  Olivia balled her fists at her side. “Was Buck hurt?”

  “Oh, you know, he was so drunk he probably didn’t feel a thing. Juke box won’t play, and they had to call the cops.”

  This wasn’t exactly how she thought Austin would have like Cade’s homecoming. She pinched the bridge of her nose. She was going to need more coffee to get through her day.

  “Did they press charges?”

  “Nah. Owner said Buck had it coming. He’d challenged Cade on some football mishaps, told him he didn’t deserve the M.V.P. for that play in the Super Bowl, and then he said something about Conner, and that was when Cade took the swing.”

  Olivia gritted her teeth. Even dead Conner could get Cade in trouble.

  Kat started toward the break room to discard her personal items. When she returned, Olivia was still standing outside her office door.

  Olivia tried to act casual, but she’d been so stunned by Kat’s news she hadn’t been able to get to work. “So what happens now, for Cade?”

  “Oh, Sheriff is just letting him sleep it off. That gossip over at the 7-11 says he’s got a huge black eye and a busted lip. Otherwise, he’s fine. But he’s going to be hurting today.”

  Olivia was grateful when the door opened, and a customer walked toward the counter.

  She retreated to her office and shut the door. Perhaps she’d just lay her head on her desk and catch some sleep. She certainly wasn’t going to be able to focus on much.

  For the first time in the almost two years since Olivia had been back to Aspen Creek, the bank had been busier than she’d ever seen it on a Saturday. She helped Kat at the teller window, took four applications for ranch equipment loans, and had to open the vault for a safety deposit box for Mrs. Krane, who just wanted to see her husband’s old wedding band, again. She missed him that much.

  When they locked the door at noon, Olivia fell into the seat of her car and let out a long and ragged breath.

  The night of no sleep, followed by the busy morning, and then the constant worry over Cade had completely exhausted her.

  What bothered her even more was the fact that Cade wasn’t hers to worry about, and he was taking up way too much of her time by doing so. But still, deep in her heart, he was her friend, and, above all else, he was Austin’s son.

  But as sons went, hers was much more important, and she was going to hurry to the park and pick him up from Michelle. Nothing would make her day better than wrapping her arms around him and holding on tight.

  Gage had run to her the moment she climbed from her car. It was if he’d known she needed his undying love.

  Michelle followed him. “He’s been playing hard.”

  “Good, maybe he’ll go down for a nap. Mommy sure could use one, too.”

  “You let me know if you could use some help this weekend finishing up the house or watching Gage so you can get some things done.”

  “I appreciate that.” Olivia looked into her son’s sleepy eyes. “I think, for now, we’re going to go to the store and buy some macaroni and cheese.”

  Gage’s squeal of approval was exactly what she’d needed to change her poor attitude.

  Gage sang as Olivia pushed him through the store in the cart. She gathered her son and the few bags and headed out to the car. It had been busy enough that no one chose to corner her and discuss the events of the past few weeks. She wasn’t keen on the way people looked at her and Gage, and then mentioned Austin as if she’d done something immoral by taking care of him.

  Having buckled Gage in his seat, she opened the trunk of her car and began to load the few bags of items they purchased.

  “You wouldn’t give an old friend a lift, would you?”

  Olivia spun around when she heard the deep, gruff voice behind her. Cade limped slowly toward her.

  “Old friend, huh?”

  The corner of his mouth turned up into that crooked grin that got him into more trouble as a kid. “I don’t remember you being so hard to win over when we were little.”

  “I’ve done a lot of growing.” She gripped her keys in her hand until they dug into her palm. “You don’t have your car?”

  “I was fairly sure I’d be better off walking last night. I left my car at home.”

  She wanted to laugh at how casually he called his father’s house home. “Your eye looks bad.” She reached to touch it, but quickly retracted her hand. What was she thinking?

  He touched it with the tips of his fingers and winced. “I’ve had worse. But its sore enough I couldn’t even put on my sunglasses.”

  Those blue eyes she’d once known so well gazed at her, and she didn’t like that he could still make her melt.

  He touched her arm. “So, what do you say? Gage won’t get mad if you give me a ride, will he?”

  At that moment, Gage let his opinion known by yelling “mac n cheeeeese” from the back seat. Olivia smiled, and Cade’s eyes narrowed.

  She closed the trunk and walked around the side of the car with Cade following close behind.

  “Gage Baker, where did you get that?” She reached in the car and took the sucker her son was trying to get into his mouth.

  His protest was cut short when he saw the man standing next to her. Gage covered his eyes and looked through his fingers.

  Cade shook his head. “Gage? This is Gage?”

  “Yes,” her voice was soft. “Cade, this is my son, Gage.”

  He let out a chuckle and took a step back. “I thought you said your husband was Gage.”

  “No, what I said was Gage and I moved back to Aspen Creek and bought the Alistair house. The rest you decided on your own.”

  “And you didn’t correct me.”

  Olivia shrugged. “I suppose we could give you a ride home.”

  Cade climbed into the car, and Olivia backed out of the parking space.

  Cade turned his body to look at Gage who was singing a song with no understandable words. “I can’t believe you’re a mother.”

  “Why? Or is it more that you can’t believe that someone would have found me appealing enough to…”

  “What I mean is…” Well, he didn’t know what he meant. But no matter what, it was sounding bad. “I don’t know why. I guess I just never thought about it. But most of my friends are married and have kids. Half of them are divorced, and a few of the people we grew up with are already dead.”

  His own breath hitched when he said it, and he saw her stiffen.

  Olivia pulled into the driveway and parked behind his Porsche. He didn’t move right away. There was a comfort sitting in Olivia’s car, a comfort he’d forgotten.

  “Why don’t you guys come in for a while?”

  “I have eggs a
nd milk in the back.”

  “I have a fridge,” he said as he opened the door.

  Gage piped up with, “In! In! In!”

  Cade smiled. “You might be surprised to find out I make a mean mac and cheese.”

  He opened the back door to the car and began to unbuckle the toddler. Gage watched him carefully, but when his seatbelt was unfastened, his arms reached up. That did something to him. It tugged at his heart as nothing ever had. He looked at him. His eyes. They were familiar. Cade let out a breath and pulled the little boy from his seat. There was a connection—a familiarity.

  By the time he’d come around the front of the car, Olivia was climbing out.

  “Cade, I don’t have time for this.” Her voice was sharp.

  “In!” Gage rested his head on Cade’s shoulder, and it pierced him with a sincerity he’d never felt before.

  “This is ridiculous.” Olivia shut the door. “Now you have turned my son against me.”

  “No one is against you, Olivia.”

  “Hmm,” she huffed as she walked to the back of the car to retrieve her groceries.

  He watched her for a moment. She wasn’t comfortable around him, but she once was. Then he realized the reaction to his statement was justified. Cade had turned against her once. He’d turned, and he’d justified everyone else who had turned their back on her. The only people who had always believed in Olivia Baker were his father and his cousin, and now they were both gone. No wonder she was gun shy. She was also mourning, and the combo could be quite dangerous.

  He carried the toddler into the house and set him on the floor. Immediately Gage went for the couch and crouched down. He looked under the couch then around the side as if he were looking for something he knew should be there.

  It occurred to Cade that Gage had been there before. This was the baby who’d been playing with the toys. That made sense now. Olivia would have had him there. His father would have known this child.

  His heart ached. Did Gage understand that the man who’d lived there was gone?

  “Are you looking for this?” Cade picked up the car he’d found under the couch and held it out to Gage.

  Gage’s eyes lit up and he hurried across the room to retrieve the car and then ran back to the coffee table and pushed it around.

  Olivia opened the front door carrying a bag of groceries, and Cade hurried over to help her. “I’ll put this in the fridge.”

  “Thank you.”

  He walked to the kitchen and pulled open the door to the refrigerator. “I don’t have anything to offer you to drink. In fact, it looks like we will have to use your milk and butter to make lunch.”

  There was a scowl on her face when he mentioned it. He’d never thought about someone else’s financial circumstances before. Perhaps his sharing in their meal was going to cost her. He’d make it up to her. Having her there, he realized he owed her that consideration and more.

  “I have some juice in the car. I’ll go get it.” She left through the front door.

  Gage looked up, watched her, and then went back to playing with his car. Cade thought it was interesting that he didn’t run after her. Most kids would run if their mother left, but he was comfortable in the house. He was comfortable with him.

  When Olivia walked back in the house, Gage only looked up. She smiled at him and went about finding everything she needed in the kitchen to make the juice.

  Cade rested against the counter. “You’re awfully comfy in this house.”

  “Spent a lot of time here in my life.”

  That was true. She never did want to be home when she lived next door. Even after she’d moved across town and when they weren’t on speaking terms, she still came by to see his father and Conner.

  “Gage seems comfortable here, too.”

  Olivia cast a loving glance at her son. “He’s spent a lot of time here, too.”

  “Is that his crib upstairs?” he asked as if the connection finally made sense.

  She casually nodded. “We stayed here when we moved. Your father offered, and then I could take care of him.”

  “So why move out?”

  “He asked me to.”

  That was an interesting twist, Cade thought. He took a breath to ask her why he’d have pushed them out when Gage interrupted.

  “Mickey.”

  They both turned their attention to him, and Olivia abandoned her juice making and walked into the other room.

  She pointed to the stand where the TV had been. “The TV is gone. See.”

  “Gone.”

  “Yes. You play with your car, and then we will eat lunch. Then home for a nap, okay?”

  Gage went back to playing as if his mother’s explanation was enough for him, and she returned to the kitchen and pulled a pot out of the cupboard and filled it at the sink.

  Cade moved in behind her, closely. “I said I’d make lunch.” He took hold of the pot and Olivia quickly moved away from him, but not before her scent washed over him.

  “I’ll go get Gage ready.”

  She disappeared again, this time returning with a diaper bag and a few of Gage’s other toys.

  By the time Cade was finished making lunch, they were seated at the table with Gage on Olivia’s lap. Cade dished out the macaroni and cheese, set it on the table, and then sat down with them.

  There wasn’t much talking between them. Olivia helped feed Gage, but Cade noticed she only took a few bites of her own lunch. When Gage was done eating, he turned around on his mother’s lap, rested his head against her shoulder, and was fast asleep.

  “He’s a good boy,” Cade said softly as not to wake him.

  Olivia rubbed his back. “Yes, he is.”

  “Where is his daddy?”

  Olivia stiffened and pushed her bowl away. “Gone.” She wrapped her arms around her son and stood. “I should get him home.”

  Cade stood and reached for her. “Please don’t hurry off. His crib is upstairs. Let him sleep.”

  “I don’t think…”

  “Don’t think.” He let his touch linger on her soft skin. “I’d like the company.”

  Olivia looked around. “You’re going to have to sell this place, aren’t you?”

  “Yes.”

  Her eyes had softened. It probably broke her heart more than his to know the house would be sold. “I could stay for a little while and help you clean up. I know you’re probably in a hurry to get back to Wisconsin.”

  She walked away and took Gage upstairs.

  When Olivia made her way back into the kitchen, Cade was gone. She looked out the window and could see that he was in the garage.

  She looked around the house. It was empty, not in belongings but in personality. Austin’s spirit wasn’t there; his laughter didn’t fill the rooms; his love and compassion would be missed.

  Tears stung her throat. His life was too short. How was she going to go on without him? How was Gage?

  Perhaps it would be good for her to help clean up the house and get it ready to sell. Cade would be gone soon. Austin and Conner were already gone. It was time to say goodbye to the Carter house, too. This would give her closure.

  She began airing out the house by opening the windows in the living room and kitchen. After looking down at her clothes, she decided it would be in her best interest to find something else to wear. She didn’t have many business suits. Ruining one wasn’t an option. More than once she had pulled an old T-shirt from Cade’s closet. She’d do it again. He certainly couldn’t fit them.

  Olivia pushed open the door to Cade’s room. Austin had always kept the room the way Cade had left it. She’d seen him go in there on occasion, but she didn’t ask him why. Though, now that she was a mother, she understood needing a connection. Didn’t she sometimes hold Gage’s blanket to her cheek when she missed him, and he was only in the other room?

  But the room was different now. The curtain was open and light filled the room, which was usually dark. The air was clear. She looked at the trophies
and they had been dusted. If the entire house needed to be cleaned, why had Cade started in there? Or had it been cleaned before he arrived?

  She went to the closet and pulled out one of Cade’s old T-shirts, the ones he’d left when he decided they weren’t worth his time—when he’d fled Aspen Creek.

  She tore an O. U. shirt off the hanger. She quickly unbuttoned her blouse, slid it from her body, and pulled on the T-shirt. As she moved to leave, she noticed a few photographs lying on the dresser. They were pictures of her and Cade—one in the tree house, another on the first day of third grade. Why were they there? She let the memory of their friendship wash over her. Could they really start all over again?

  Once she was back in the kitchen, she retrieved the dusting cloths she herself had stored under the sink and dusted the living room.

  Gage had always slept through vacuuming so she vacuumed the room as well, and then checked on him. She wished he slept as well during the night. Then maybe she wouldn’t be such an emotional wreck.

  Cade, however, still hadn’t come back into the house. Olivia walked out the front door, and there he was.

  “You’re fixing the swing?”

  “Almost done.” He looked up at her. “Nice shirt.”

  She looked down at herself. “I hope you don’t mind.”

  “O.U. never looked so nice on anyone else.”

  Her heart kicked up a beat. “So, of all the rooms you’ve cleaned, why start with your bedroom?”

  He looked up at her, his hand still securing the chain. “It was that way when I showed up. As if he knew I was coming and would need a place to stay.”

  She was sure of that now.

  Olivia watched as he tightened the last bolt and gave the chain a solid tug. The muscles in his arms tightened. “That should do the trick.”

  Cautiously, he sat down and gave the swing a push.

  Olivia watched as he lifted his hand to her, and she took it. She sat down next to him, and he draped his arm over the back of the swing and pushed them into motion with his foot.

  “We used to spend a lot of time on this swing,” he said casually.