It was taking such a risk. And yet, she almost wanted to do something selfish—to lash back at Ben for all that he’d done to her. To seize a moment for herself.
She reached up to Alec, standing on tiptoe. He leaned down, his mouth a breath away from hers. His eyes flared with unspoken need, and she drew her palm along the edge of his jaw. There was no mistaking the raw desire in his eyes.
But he was giving her the choice.
“What did you decide?” His voice was rough, almost primal in tone.
Her skin was alive, prickled with goosebumps. She drew her fingers along his cheek slowly. Then she pulled him lower and kissed him.
Her lips were warm, and Alec kissed her back, sliding his fingers in her hair. Though he didn’t know what thoughts were running through her mind, right now he didn’t care. He lifted her to sit on the granite bathroom counter, which made it easier to kiss her. The heat between them rose hotter, as if he couldn’t get enough of her. He claimed her mouth, his tongue slipping inside to tangle with hers. A slight moan broke free and she parted her knees. He slid his palms up her calves until he reached the hem of her dress.
He knew that she wanted him as much as he desired her, but he didn’t want her to feel pressured into something she wasn’t ready for. He drew back from her mouth and murmured, “If you need me to stop, I will.”
“I don’t know what I want.” She wound her arms around his neck and met his gaze with her own. Her cheeks were flushed, and she whispered, “I know this isn’t real. And I know it’s too soon. All I want is to forget about everything else. I want to steal a moment where I’m not thinking about the past or the future. There’s only now.”
He understood her desires, but he also knew the weight of guilt. He was involved in business dealings with Carnell, and if she ever found out, she would be furious with him. He was a bastard for letting this happen between them.
But the moment she reached for him again, he lost himself in her embrace. There was something different about Sarah. She gave herself fully, with no hesitation. He wanted to push away the terrible memories that haunted her and replace them with a night of surrender.
“Do you want to go to dinner?” he murmured against her mouth as he slid his hand up her bare thigh.
“No. We can eat here.” She kissed him back, and he decided that room service was a very good idea.
He lifted her from the counter and carried her into the bedroom. From the window, Christmas lights gleamed against the reflection of the Seine. Slowly, he lowered her to stand and took her hand. He led her to the sliding glass door and stood behind her so she could see.
“So beautiful,” he said, while he moved her hair to the side and kissed her nape. She shivered at the touch, and he reached for the tie that held her dress closed. He rested his hands there for a moment, still giving her the choice.
There was no discussion of a future between them—but she had only asked for a night to forget. And this was something he could give.
Alec opened her dress, baring her black bra and underwear. He slid his hands down her waist, kissing her throat as he did. Goosebumps prickled across her skin, and he was mesmerized by the swell of her breasts cupped by the black satin. He gave in to the urge to slide his hands over her breasts, reaching to unfasten the band of her bra. She leaned back against him and murmured, “You’re wearing too many clothes.”
When she turned, his breath caught at the sight of her creamy skin and her bare breasts. It took an effort to control the surge of raw need that claimed him. He wanted to lift her in his arms and lay her back on the bed, pleasuring her until she cried out in release. But he wanted the moment to last.
Sarah reached for the buttons of his shirt, flicking them off one by one. He lifted away his undershirt until his chest was bare. When she slid her hands over his pectoral muscles, his body hardened with need. She was looking at him in a way that made his heartbeat quicken. There was yearning but also a hint of sadness. He lifted his hand to her bruised cheek and stroked it. “He never should have hit you. It won’t happen again.”
She shook her head. “No. Because I’m never going back to him.”
Alec leaned in to kiss her cheek before capturing her mouth again. He was caught up in the moment, in the way she yielded to him. He reached for her breast and cupped it, caressing her nipple. She shuddered, and her fingers dug into his shoulders. He continued kissing her, all the while stroking her breasts.
She seemed shaken by his touch, and she closed her eyes as if overwhelmed by the sensations. He was beginning to wonder if any man had ever taken the time to please her. He wanted to discover her secret places, to make her cry out in fulfillment.
Alec guided her back to the bed and removed the rest of his clothing, leaving it on the floor. He took a condom from his wallet and tore open the foil, sliding it on. Then he laid her back on the bed and leaned to kiss her stomach. He trailed his mouth lower before he caught her panties and slid them down. She nearly came off the bed when he drew his hand between her legs. She was damp with need, and when he stroked her, she tried to reach for him.
“Not yet,” he soothed. “Let me touch you first. I want to watch you come apart.”
“I don’t—” she started to say and then amended, “I meant, don’t worry about me.”
He rested his weight on his forearms and stole another kiss. Realization dawned within him, and he murmured, “I’m going to touch you until you can hardly take another breath. I want you to feel everything you’ve never felt before.”
CHAPTER EIGHT
Sarah couldn’t bring herself to speak. Already her body was trembling with need, and the feeling of his hard length nestled against her was a temptation she could not deny. But she didn’t want to admit that Ben had been her only lover. Although he’d never hurt her, he’d accused her of taking too long to climax. After a time, she had simply pretended that she was experiencing an orgasm.
The truth was, she had often felt used by him. No matter how hard she tried to please him, it was never enough. She wouldn’t please Alec, either. She had little doubt of that.
“It’s all right,” she whispered, reaching for his erection. He was velvet hard and thick, and she saw the way his face tightened as she stroked him. But instead of letting her guide him inside, he clasped her wrists and pinned her back.
“Not yet, Sarah.” He kept his grip light, but he made no secret of his intentions. “I haven’t finished yet. I want to learn every curve of your body.”
“You don’t have to,” she started to say, but he cut her off with another kiss.
“Shh. Just lie back and enjoy this.”
She didn’t know if she could bear it, but there was no choice except to let him have his way. With that, his hot mouth covered her breast. She felt a spear of pleasure thrust within her, echoing between her legs. He caressed her other breast while he suckled the first, and she gripped the bedcovers.
His mouth moved to the second breast, and this time, he slid his finger against her cleft. God above, but she was stunned with her body’s response. He was tantalizing her, drawing out the feelings. When he circled her clitoris with his thumb, a tremor began to form within her. She was aching, arching against him. His tongue worked at her nipple simultaneously, and she sobbed out a breath while she felt herself growing slicker. A primal rhythm caught her, and she pressed back against his fingers. He rewarded her by entering her moist depths with two fingers, stroking her from inside.
She bent her knees, waiting for him to enter her. Instead, he kept up the rhythm, guiding her closer and closer to the peak. She wanted so badly to let go, but her body refused to surrender. It was as if she were fighting against herself and the woman she used to be.
“I’ve never wanted any woman as much as I want you,” he said against her ear. This time, he cupped her bottom and lowered his mouth between her legs. Never in her life had any man kissed her there, and she was enslaved by the torment of his wicked tongue. He found the place of her pl
easure and this time, he used his mouth to drive her over the edge. She felt herself rising higher, an eruption of shimmering desire ripping through her as she came apart.
She arched hard, and as the shudder of release broke over her, he entered her body. The feeling of his slick invasion made her let out a keening cry, and he kept up a gentle thrust as she climaxed around him. She convulsed again as he entered and withdrew, and she clung to him, shaking as he took his own pleasure within her.
She lost herself in him, meeting him as he penetrated. For the first time in her life, she understood that this was lovemaking, not sex. He had been attentive to her needs, drawing out her release until she was desperate to make him feel the same. She wrapped her legs around his waist, running her hands down to his hips.
“Let me touch you,” she said, but he only studied her face.
“Later,” he promised. “Touching you gives me pleasure. And being inside you.”
He withdrew, turning her to her stomach. He dragged her hips upward and entered her from behind. The new position allowed him to penetrate deeper, and she was shocked by the delicious sensation. He quickened his pace, gripping her waist as he plunged deep.
Sarah couldn’t stop the moans that escaped her as they thrust together. He reached to cup her breasts as he rocked within her, and when he stroked her erect nipples, she squeezed his length inside.
“Do that again,” he commanded, and she obeyed, gripping him as he slid inside and withdrew. “I could spend all night inside you. But I want you to come again. This time while I’m in you.”
He slowed his pace and moved her to lie on her side. Though he was still embedded inside, he reached around to stroke her clitoris. She was flooded with the sensation of his thick length inside while he caressed her hooded flesh.
Without warning, another orgasm tore through her, and her nails dug into his leg. He didn’t move while she rode out the storm, shaking against him.
She backed against him, and he continued to enter and withdraw until he tensed and at last found his own release. She lay in his arms, feeling satisfied and almost beloved. Her heart was still pounding, and she could hardly believe the feelings he’d evoked. Never in her life had she enjoyed such a night. She was cradled in his arms, his body still inside her when she whispered, “Merry Christmas, Alec.”
There was nothing more satisfying than spending the night with Sarah. He had loved her twice more, and they had eaten a late dinner from room service. Although he’d barely gotten any sleep, he had no regrets.
He wanted Sarah to stay with him. In his mind, he envisioned a life where he shared his apartment with her, waking up beside her. This woman had ensnared him, and he wanted so much more from her.
But first, he had to ensure that Carnell could never hurt her again. This afternoon, he sequestered himself in the office to call Miranda Carnell. He didn’t know what she wanted, but his instincts remained on alert. There was no reason to trust her.
When he dialed the number, her assistant answered, and he waited for her to call him back. In the meantime, he read through the budget, wondering if he could save the unprofitable hotels before they had to close.
The phone rang, and he answered, “Harrow.”
“Mr. Harrow, can you talk freely?” came Miranda’s voice.
“Yes. What is it you want?” He had no doubt Ben’s wife had learned of the affair. But Alec fully intended to shield Sarah from the outcome. She was the innocent party in all of this and had only recently learned that her life had been built upon lies.
“I want you to tell me about her.”
“No.” He wouldn’t even consider it. “Sarah was trying to escape from Ben. She knew nothing about you until a few days ago.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. How could she not know?” Beneath the contempt in Miranda’s voice, he caught a trace of fear. “Ben and I have been married for ten years now.”
He understood the woman’s desire to assert herself, but not at Sarah’s expense. “Leave her out of this. She left him and has no desire to return.”
“Good.” Miranda’s voice turned cool. “I’m glad to hear it.” He waited for her to continue, wondering if there was another reason why she had called.
She answered his unspoken proposition by saying, “I know that you and Ben have a business meeting in a few days.”
He didn’t deny it, and she said, “I want a virtual meeting with you beforehand. There are things we need to discuss.”
“Such as?” He couldn’t understand what Miranda could possibly want from him.
“You’re going to need my help. He’s setting you up, Alec.” Her voice turned almost sultry. “I know the sort of man he is. And Ben has no intention of helping your business succeed. Especially since he knows you took her with you to Paris. I overheard him talking on the phone.”
A coldness slipped through his veins at the invisible threat toward Sarah. He knew Miranda hadn’t remained married to a predator like Ben without having her own defenses.
“Why would I trust you to help me?” he said. “You’re more likely to blame Sarah for what happened when we both know it wasn’t her fault.”
“Ben enjoys the chase,” she said. “He likes to make a woman feel as if no one compares to her. Until he wins her as a possession. Then he grows tired of her and discards her.”
Miranda paused a moment. “I know what that’s like. And you can’t leave, no matter how you might want to. You belong to him, and Ben owns you, body and soul.”
“He doesn’t own Sarah,” he responded. “Not anymore.”
“Yes, he does. She just doesn’t recognize it yet.” With that, Miranda finished by saying, “Call me when you get back to New York, just before your meeting. I can help you gain the advantage over Ben. And in return, you’ll help me.”
Sarah didn’t miss the strain on Alec’s face or the tension in his body after he returned to the room. He sat on the foot of the bed, and she moved behind him, massaging his shoulders. “What did Miranda say to you?”
“She warned me about Ben. She said that he would try to ruin my business, especially if you’re involved with me.”
She continued working at the knots in his neck and shoulders, though he didn’t relax at all. “I’ll be going to Florida soon,” she said. “There’s no reason to worry about me.” Christopher was the only family she had left, and she wanted to heal the rift between them. She’d have to find her own place, but she wanted to be closer to him so they could work out their differences.
“I don’t like the idea of you going alone. Ben might try to follow you.” Alec caught her hands and turned to face her. There was worry there, along with the invisible tension.
Although she appreciated his concern, she wasn’t Alec’s responsibility. They had spent a wonderful Christmas together, but her problems were her own.
“I’ll be okay,” she assured him. No matter what Ben said or did, she was starting to regain her footing. He had threatened her, but now, she was starting to realize what it felt like to have a life without him. She didn’t hold the illusion that she had a real relationship with Alec—last night had been about reclaiming herself. It had been a beautiful moment, a gift she would cherish. She’d enjoyed spending the night in his arms, and she held no regrets.
He leaned over to kiss her. “I have to be back in New York in two days,” he said. “Vacation has to come to an end, unfortunately.” The regret in his voice echoed her own feelings of emptiness. But now, she needed to pull the pieces of her life together and take steps forward.
“Can you help me book a flight to Tampa?” she asked. “I can transfer from LaGuardia.”
He seemed slightly taken aback, though he asked, “Don’t you need to pack the rest of your belongings from Ben’s apartment?”
She didn’t know how to answer that. “Maybe later.” Right now, it was easier to walk away from her home with Ben. He had bought nearly everything, and even her clothes evoked bad memories. “I think I’d rather leave it be
hind.” Though she knew she needed to face her ex, she still didn’t feel ready to confront him yet.
And really, did she have to confront him? In a way, it was liberating to know that she never had to see him again. Or if their paths did cross, she owed him nothing.
“I can book the flight, if that’s what you want.” Alec reached out to tuck a lock of hair behind one ear. She tried to guard her feelings, but his gesture of affection only deepened the realization that she would miss him.
“Or if you want to wait a few more days, you can stay at my place in New York,” he finished. “This doesn’t have to end so soon.”
Though she wanted to say yes, another part of her held back. She was becoming too dependent on Alec, and she didn’t want a knight in shining armor sweeping in to fix her mistakes. She wanted to gather her own courage, to be stronger for herself and for what was to come.
She caught his hand and held it. “If I stay with you, I won’t want to go. And I need to start rebuilding my life.”
His expression turned heated, and he drew her to lie down beside him, their feet tangled together. “I don’t want you to go, either. Spend New Year’s Eve with me. Or longer, if you want. There are plenty of jobs in New York.”
She lost herself in his blue eyes. “It’s too soon for a relationship, Alec. You know it, and so do I.”
“I’m not asking for more than you can give.” His hand moved to her cheek, and then he drew it lower to the small of her back. “Take it day by day. As long as you need.”
Sarah felt her body rising to his call, and the memories of lovemaking only aroused her more. The heat of his palm made her insides go liquid, and all her resolutions crumbled in the wake of her feelings.
She wanted to spend more time with this man, and that was dangerous. She had to gather her senses. Alec was a good man, but she knew better than to let down her guard. Everything was happening so fast, she felt almost dizzy.
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