Damien’s Dilemma

by Cohen, Julie K.

  “How could she be gone? She’s a part of you. At most, she’s lost for a bit. We will find her.”

  ‘We.’ It had a nice ring to it, like she wouldn’t be alone. A hand sifted through her hair from behind, and she found herself leaning her head against Damien’s thigh. Soft denim rubbed against her cheek. He’d brought his clothing and dressed already. It was nice that he didn’t want her to feel uncomfortable around him.

  “I should have healed by now.”

  “Weak shifters always take longer to shift, to heal. It’s the way things are.”

  Why did he think she was weak? Other than the obvious problem of not being able to shift, heal, smell, see, and hear long distance… Oh, God, she was weak. But not human weak, not yet. Or was she? No, she couldn’t be, because Damien was right. Her wolf was a part of who she was. She had to be in there, and it was up to Tess to find her.

  Damien held out his hand to her, a silent question hanging between them. Did she trust him enough to go back with him, to let herself heal with his pack instead of going home to family? From the first moment she had looked up from that cage into his stunning gray eyes, she’d seen a gentleness that she’d never seen in anyone else. That was the moment she knew she could trust him.

  Tess slipped her hand into his and they walked in silence for a half mile before she leaned into him and held out her wrist with the tattoo.

  “Canine Lupus Shifter. That’s what the CLS stands for. I didn’t lie about anything else. I don’t know what happened to the others, or why I was separated from them. As for my pack, maybe my alpha and the others searched but couldn’t find me. My alpha isn’t exactly the most dedicated or astute. He probably gave up looking for me a while ago.”

  “Then he doesn’t deserve to be alpha. The pack is his responsibility. Giving up is not an option.”

  There were times like this that Damien could be so sweet, without even realizing it. She reached up and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

  He arched a brow as he drew her tight to him. Her breasts pressed against his hard chest, and she could feel another hardness of his, much lower. Her body heated all too easily at his touch. Having him hold her, his arms snugly wrapped around her, made her feel safe like she was home. She’d stay in this position forever if she could, but she would have to leave his pack soon, before the trouble started. Whether Damien realized it or not, there would be trouble. A new member in a pack always caused problems, even if unintentionally.

  “Not that I’d ever turn down a kiss, but what was that for?” He looked all cocky and proud of himself, as if he’d just bested a challenger in a fight, and she was his prize. She liked the idea of being his prize.

  “Just because.”

  He drew a finger down her jaw, letting it glide back and forth until she closed her eyes. Whether it was his scent or how easy he was to talk to, there was something about him that felt right, as right as that hand skimming over her throat and down to her breast, awakening every nerve in her body. Warmth and excitement spread through her, wrapping around her soul.

  “That’s not fair,” she said, between heavy breaths as the pad of his thumb brushed over one nipple again and again, drawing it into a hard peak.

  “Shall I stop?” he asked, as his fingers dipped under her bra, caressing the side of her breast, teasing her, making her want more with him.

  His mouth captured hers. His velvety tongue glided over her lips and into her mouth with a force that said he was not to be denied. She loved that, needed that, right now. The chance to feel, luxuriate in his touch, to be fully alive again.

  Her hands wove through his thick hair with a wanton thought that he would be hers someday. Or maybe that thought came from his hand that found her ass and was pulling her tight against his body. The pulsing between her legs drove her hips forward. His groan ignited a fire in her. She began grinding against his hardness as his hand slipped between her tight bra and her sensitized flesh, making her too aware of the layers between them.

  Damien didn’t hold back, which was something she liked about him. He pushed her blouse up and over her head. The cool air struck heated skin, making her already hard nipples press even harder against her bra. Damien pushed the bra down, exposing both breasts.

  He lowered his mouth to a nipple. First a flick of his tongue, then little teasing nips caused heat to pool at her core. Her hands fisted his hair as she arched her back, offering herself to him. A slight chuckle escaped him as he moved to the other breast.

  “So not fair,” she managed to say as he flicked his tongue against her nipple before finally latching on and sucking hard, really hard. Damien liked it rough, apparently. That was the good thing about being a shifter. She could handle rough. Or she could before… What if she wasn’t shifter anymore? She was sure her wolf was still there, but what if Damien was wrong?

  “Tess? Come back to me, Sweetness.”

  He was holding her head between his palms. Her skin was damp with tears.

  “Talk to me,” he urged, nudging her head enough so that she would meet his eyes. When she refused, he released her.

  “Did I hurt you?” he asked, his voice wavering between concern and anger.

  She was messing everything up. She adjusted her bra and pulled her blouse on. Her sore shoulder made getting dressed a pitiful display of gracelessness. That was yet another reminder that she wasn’t the shifter she used to be. Maybe she wasn’t a shifter at all, now.

  As if he could read her thoughts, as if he knew what she needed, Damien wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin against the top of her head. “Your wolf needs a chance to heal, like the rest of you.”

  A desperate cry tore from her throat and her entire body shook, but he held her tighter, stroking her hair and repeating in her ear that everything would be fine. She had been holding it all in for days, weeks, months, without anyone to talk to, anyone to tell her it would be all right. She had no reason to believe him. Her wolf hadn’t shown herself in nearly a year. Even that underlying spirit that gave Tess strength and confidence when she needed it most was gone. She hoped Damien knew what he was talking about and that her wolf would return in time.

  Chapter Seven

  DAMIEN

  “I think I found it,” Blade said as he approached. Damien was conferring with Hayden as they waited for the last twenty adults to arrive. Only about seventy of the pack had gathered in the clearing for the pack meeting. It wasn’t the full pack, but the stragglers still had a few minutes to arrive before the meeting began. Eight to ten shifters plus the older teens would be hosting a Night Under The Stars outing for the younger kids, while a group of five watched the infants at one of the houses. Another twenty or more were patrolling the perimeter. Callen had increased security after the recent abductions. Having a WSSO lab only thirty miles away was too close for anyone’s comfort.

  “What did you find?” Damien asked, as he searched the crowd for Pryce and Tess. Pryce was to escort her here and watch over her while Damien led the meeting. Callen was conspicuously absent, which annoyed Damien more than it concerned him. He liked to have his top shifters at general meetings, so the pack would be assured that everything was fine. A disjointed pack made shifters nervous, and that’s the last thing he needed with the alphas from the other packs coming in less than two days.

  “Her pack.” Blade placed his back to the rock wall behind them and scanned the crowd. Blade was constantly seeking anything out of place, always expecting the worst to happen. Damien couldn’t blame him after what had happened to his birth-pack. “She said Florida, right?”

  “Apopka,” Hayden said. “That’s central Florida, I believe.”

  “I couldn’t find any information about any packs even living in Florida, but there was something in the news nine months back. Police reports of a mass murder-suicide in a state park. Rock Springs Run State Reserve. All the names you gave me, the ones she mentioned, were on the list of dead they found. Some of the bodies had been eaten by gators by the ti
me anyone discovered the site. Her entire pack was wiped out.”

  Damien turned his back to the gathering crowd. This was not the place to discuss this, not within shifters’ hearing. He lowered his voice as much as possible.

  “Not a suicide. The WSSO got to them. Revenge for whatever damage her pack did to their facilities, perhaps. Whatever the reason, it’s not a coincidence.”

  Hayden’s face was stone cold. “No one searched for her or spread news of her disappearance because there was no one alive who knew she was missing.”

  “Not a word of this to her,” Damien ordered.

  “She needs to know. It’s her pack.”

  Blade had said it as if Damien didn’t understand the emotional pain behind losing a pack. Well, he couldn’t know it in the same way as Blade, but he knew Tess well enough to know the news would decimate her.

  “She’s still recovering, and her wolf… there are problems.” Except for Hayden, he hadn’t told anyone that she couldn’t shift. He wanted to keep the pressure off of her as long as possible, to give Tess and her wolf a chance to recover.

  “Damien—” Hayden began.

  “I’ll tell her before the meeting with Liam and Drake. I can’t hide any news involving the WSSO.”

  “You’re actually going to tell them about Tess?” Blade asked.

  Damien knew what Blade was warning him about. Telling Drake about Tess could put her in further danger. “I’m undecided about that. I may mention the attack in Florida and leave her out of it.”

  “He already knows about Tess,” Hayden said. “His shifters we rescued would have told him about her though they’ll believe her human, as we did.”

  “I’m moving the meeting to the clearing. I don’t want him anywhere near her. As for you Hayden,” Damien hated what he was about to do, but he couldn’t afford to piss off Drake. Damien and Liam needed Drake, if they were going to take on the WSSO. “You’ll stay in camp as well.”

  Hayden growled and stepped away. When it came to Drake, Hayden’s brother and alpha of Hayden’s former pack, he had trouble remaining calm. Keeping him away from the meeting wasn’t fair to Hayden, and it didn’t help his standing with the shifters in Damien’s pack, given how many of them still weren’t sure if they could trust him. Hayden would come to understand the decision for what it was, in time.

  Once the last shifters arrived, Damien began the meeting, going through general business starting with the changes in state guidelines on education. He emphasized how all parents were expected to ensure their kids spend as much time studying the human-based curriculum as they did the shifter-based one. Even though they lived apart from humans, shifters still needed to be able to blend in and understand the human world. Uneducated shifters weakened the pack.

  By the time Damien finished updating everyone on the changes in security for when the other alphas and their contingents arrived, the pack was restless and agitated.

  The shifters knew what topic was next: Tess. The adults all knew of the raid on the research facility. Damien and his top shifters had rescued eight of their own that night, as well as several from Liam’s and Drake’s packs. Many more hadn’t survived. His pack had lost three, an older shifter who worked maintenance and two young females who worked in the cookhouse. All had been well liked, and all still had family in the pack. Bringing a human back—someone the shifters believed was human—had angered them. The area wreaked of the crowd’s anxiety and hatred. He shouldn’t have waited this long to speak with his pack.

  As soon as Damien gave the overview of why he’d brought Tess back, the questions started. Where was she from? Why did he bring a human here? Would she bring the WSSO back if the pack let her leave?

  He should have led with the fact that she was a shifter, but telling them that the WSSO had robbed her of her ability to shift would cause panic. Tess and Damien still didn’t know the cause behind her inability to shift. Until he had answers to give, he had to let the pack believe she was human.

  “Kill her before she endangers the pack.”

  “Who said that?” Damien demanded, his voice brimming with rage.

  Rinn, one of the wolves on the sanitation crew, stepped forward. “You’ve said it yourself, Damien. Humans are dangerous. We can’t risk having them here. If she finds out we’re shifters, she’ll tell the authorities, and you know what happens then.”

  He did. All too well. Stealth teams would come in during the night, slit as many throats as they could while the shifters slept. Once the alarm was raised, snipers in the trees would pick off the runners. He’d heard the stories from all over the U.S. and Europe, even seen the aftermath in one pack in North Dakota last year. While the U.S. government hadn’t declared war or approved of the slaughter of innocent shifters, there were independent groups like the WSSO who took it upon themselves to cleanse the country of shifters whenever they were located.

  Murmurs ran through the pack like wildfire. Damien could feel the tension growing, as well as the whispers of “kill her” and “make an example of her.” It was time to end this.

  Damien shifted. His silver wolf howled long and hard, gaining the pack’s full attention. That’s when he scented honey and flowers in the air. His Tess had arrived.

  A male shifter in the back yelled, “That’s the human who killed our people,” and all hell broke loose. Growls and snarls echoed off of the mountains, as everyone started shifting. Everyone that is, except Tess.

  Damien’s wolf leaped over the heads of a dozen shifters and plowed through scores more, as he raced toward Tess. Pryce had already shifted and was standing in front of her, ready to defend her. Blade, Hayden, and Frank intercepted three males who were heading straight for her, but the guards had missed the tan wolf who had lowered his head and was slowly creeping up behind her. Damien leaped onto the shifter’s back, sending them both into a roll.

  “Enough!” The command reverberated through the crowd as loud as any howl could have. With dark brown-red hair whipping in the wind and light green eyes that held a fire of their own, Tess stood high up on a boulder for everyone to see.

  Damien bounded toward the rock, not caring which shifters he knocked over in the process. Their behavior was outrageous, and when he discovered who the asshole was that yelled the inciting comment, Damien would be picking fur out of his teeth for a week.

  “I realize you don’t know me, and maybe you don’t want to,” she said from atop the boulder. “But I am a shifter, a red wolf, at least on my mother’s side. I’m only here because your alpha rescued me the same night he rescued your packmates. I’m not here to cause trouble, and I’ll be leaving soon.”

  “Prove it. Shift!”

  Tess stood there, likely stunned by the challenge. From here, he could sense her grief. Damien, still in his wolf form, leapt up beside Tess. Her hand slipped to his head, sinking into his fur, as if she needed to touch him.

  “I’m still healing from my captivity.”

  He could tell from how her voice shook that she didn’t believe her own words. He was so very proud of how she stood up to the rioters, like an alpha, giving the shifters information they could believe without having to lie. It would do the pack no good to know that the WSSO could break a shifter, steal his or her ability to shift. His pack would learn the truth in due course, but this wasn’t the time or place.

  “Go home, human!”

  The bastard who’d shouted that was hiding in the back. Damien growled so loud in that direction that the shifters parted, exposing the male. Whoever this faded silver wolf was, he had shifted to his wolf quickly, which meant his strength could match or exceed Damien’s.

  The wolf showed no sign of backing down as Damien bared his teeth. The faded silver drew his gums back, flashing very white and sharp teeth. The crowd of wolves and shifters formed a ring around Damien and his challenger.

  The faded silver snarled and lunged, too low to do more than strike Damien’s flank and send him off-balance, but that could be an effective tactic if fo
llowed up with claws to the throat. Damien let his wolf take over, making a minuscule adjustment to his angle and then leaping higher than the faded silver. Damien’s wolf body-slammed the other wolf, forcing him to the ground in one move.

  Damien clamped his jaws on the challenger’s neck, pinning him. The faded silver shifted into a large man with curly brown hair. Now Damien recognized him; he was one of three new shifters he’d accepted into the pack over the winter. Callen had vetted this one. Thomas, Tim, something like that. It didn’t matter anymore. The shifter would be dead in a minute.

  That’s when a hand sifted through the fur behind Damien’s ears, stroking him in a way that called to him, reminding him that there were others watching, that his decision would impact the entire pack. Damien’s wolf was not pleased at the interference; he wanted the shifter’s blood.

  With one leg on the shifter’s neck, Damien shifted to his human form. Tim, Thomas, whatever, remained on the ground, breathing heavily, fully expecting Damien to end him. That’s when Damien noticed the unease, anger, even confusion in the faces of his pack, the males and females who knew he could rip the shifter’s throat out, even in human form. They were nervous for the shifter they’d already accepted as one of their own.

  Damien had read the reports, heard the comments of various parents about how this new addition to their pack had been a great boon. A skilled teacher who had already connected with several of the more troubled teenaged shifters as they were coming into their wolves for the first time. It would be a loss for the pack if Damien ended him. And here he had been asking the families to invest more time and heart into their children’s education.

  Tess stroked Damien’s fur once more. Her calming influence allowed him to consider the ramifications, something he would not have been able to do had she not been there. Then her hand fell away, and she stepped back, making it clear to him and the pack that the final decision was Damien’s and that he was their leader. It’s what Blade and Hayden had been telling Damien, that he needed to lead, not scare or beat his shifters into submission like Drake and even Damien’s own father had done. Tess knew what Damien needed to do, too, and she tempered him long enough to act like the leader he wanted to be.