Damien’s Dilemma

by Cohen, Julie K.

  She couldn’t see him in the dark, but she knew he could see her. As she closed her eyes, her hands sank into his hair, and she relished having him touch her again. He drew her hard nipple into his mouth, awakening a body that had been denied too long. She missed the intimacy of his touch, how he would scent her as if she were the air he needed to breathe, how those strong muscles of his would wrap around her with utmost care, as if she were made of glass.

  Even now, as his tongue licked a path down her chest to her navel, sending heat through her body, she couldn’t pull away from him, though she needed to. This wasn’t right. He needed to be with Aloe, to blood-bond her and permanently calm his wolf.

  His hands curved over Tess’s hips, holding her still as he scented between her legs and cupped her ass. There was an air about him that was different, as he pulled her tight to him and thrust his face against her jeans. Her breath hitched as wetness slipped from her.

  Every nerve in her body was dancing with anticipation, but Damien stopped moving as he drew in a long breath. It was as if he needed to enjoy the moment, draw her into his body with every one of his senses.

  “Why?” she asked, not sure if she was asking herself why she couldn’t have him or why he had scared her so.

  “You tried to leave me.” He climbed up her body to her other breast. His tongue was masterful, drawing out the taut bud only for him to trap it between his teeth and tug hard enough to send a new type of pleasure through her.

  He released her breast and leaned his head against her stomach. “Watched you sleeping for four days, talked to you. I wasn’t allowed to touch you, except through a damn rubber glove. You wouldn’t wake, no matter what I said or how long I talked.”

  As his lips drew near hers, she turned her head to avoid him. If they kissed, she’d never be able to walk away from him again.

  “I was scared you’d never wake,” he said, his voice losing all strength. “You left me, Tess.”

  “I didn’t want to leave you. I love you,” she said, tears streaming down her face as sunlight began filtering through the window.

  “If you loved me, you wouldn’t push me away.” There was a storm brewing in his eyes, a restlessness that would not release him. The desire to calm him, to help him conquer the wildness inside of him gripped her, but his pack needed their alpha: an alpha who was strong and fair, an alpha who could stand against the likes of the WSSO and Drake without losing his humanity.

  That was an ironic term that Damien would no doubt find offensive and appropriate at the same time, if he were himself. But he wasn’t himself these days, and that was the problem. He wasn’t going to get better until he blood-bonded a strong shifter. He needed Aloe.

  Tess’s fingers lightly traced the contours of his face, his low cheekbones, and strong, square jaw. She wanted to kiss every spot her fingers touched and then move lower, leaving nothing of him unexplored.

  “You’re with Aloe now. Go, be with her.”

  “There’s no one else, but you, Tess.”

  She stilled for a moment, stunned. She thought he had slept with Aloe. The fact that he hadn’t was heartening and disheartening. That’s why he was in this frantic state.

  “I have to leave,” Tess said as her hand cupped his cheek.

  “Is that it, then? You walk away from me? What then? We send each other a card once a year to fill each other in on our lives? Do you think I want to hear about you moving in with another shifter or human, to imagine you fucking another male?”

  “I’m not yours, Damien. Never have been.”

  He unhooked her jeans and slid them down over her thighs very slowly, his hands molding to her body as if he were memorizing her every curve. His hands left behind a tingling that had her longing to explore him. She needed to walk away... now... this very second. He had released her hands, but she couldn’t bring herself to walk away from him. She stared out the window as pre-dawn light filled the small cabin.

  “Want me to stop, Tess?”

  “What I want doesn’t matter, does it?”

  “This is all about you.” He slipped his hand down her very-wet panties and into her folds, owning her in that moment. His fingers played with her clit, finally settling on a rhythm that drew her eyes to him. Two fingers slipped into her channel, all while he rubbed the base of his palm against her mound. The combination brought on the wave of sheer bliss so suddenly she wasn’t prepared for it.

  He pressed his mouth to her ear. “Fuck, you’re so damn sexy. Don’t fight me. Come on my hand.”

  His tongue plunged into her mouth, and it threw her over the top, her walls contracting against his fingers. The wave that crashed over her drew what little energy she had from her muscles, making her falter. He pinned her to the wall with his body, holding her up as he pulled his hand out of her pants and licked off his fingers.

  An arrogant smile filled his face, but it was his determination that scared her. He’d never let her go, and she didn’t want him to. Having his scent fill her, having him holding her and looking at her as if she was his world, created a need so deep within her that she wasn’t sure she was strong enough to walk away from him.

  “Tell me what it will take, and it’s yours,” he said, the desperation in his voice widening the crack in her soul.

  She needed to drive him away, for his own sake. “You’ll never have me, Damien, and there’s nothing you can say or do to change that.”

  His eyes darkened, searing right through her as a growl rose from his throat. Her eyes widened when she realized she’d challenged Damien, an aroused alpha already battling his wolf for control.

  She yelped as he scooped her up and laid her onto the rug in the center of the cabin. Dark eyes loomed over her, unforgiving and determined, as he ripped her jeans and panties from her ankles in one yank, leaving her completely naked. The ratchet of his zipper opening had her clenching her thighs, but it was the way he bared his teeth that made her go completely still. To move now, to run, would give him a chase, and that was the last thing she wanted because she knew how it would end—she’d give in and blood-bond him.

  “You’re mine, Tess,” he said as his cock sprang free. “No more running. I will have you. Here. Now.” She was hot, throbbing, and unable to take her eyes from his huge cock with a bead of pre-cum on the tip. Her words had been careless, but now that she was here on the floor, with him about to claim her, she didn’t want to be anywhere else. She wanted this one moment with him, to feel him inside of her, to know the bliss of being one with Damien in the most base, primal way possible.

  There were no more words or kisses from Damien. He splayed his large hands on her thighs, holding her open, putting her on display as if he owned her. God, she wanted him to own her, more than anything, for him to take control and remove any doubt she had, to tell her she wasn’t allowed to leave and would be his, no matter the consequences.

  He lowered his head to her pussy, took one drawn-out sniff and inhaled, much like a wine connoisseur savoring the bouquet of a treasured vintage before tasting its delicate essence. She was squirming, needing his fingers, his mouth, his cock in her, but she remained quiet. He needed to take, to control, to show her that he was worthy of her. With each squirm of her hips, the sides of his mouth curled up and his hold on her hips tightened.

  For days, weeks maybe, his wolf had been stealing control from Damien bit by bit. Damien, her poor Damien, had been asserting himself more each day, trying to maintain a hold on his pack, to protect them from the WSSO. He had been so protective of her, all without an outlet or time away from the constant battle of his wolf. He needed this, to assert himself as alpha. She wouldn’t fight him, not when she needed him so badly that her soul ached at the thought of leaving him.

  One languid lick of his tongue through her folds had her arching her back. Then he was sucking on her clit, bringing her exquisite pleasure. When she tried to pull away, to give her over-sensitized flesh a chance to calm, he wouldn’t relent, not even for a second. That tongue o
f his was as skilled as his hands, fucking her with wild abandon.

  Her hips were bucking, rising off the floor. When her moans deepened, another orgasm already rising within her, he growled, and she knew he didn’t want her to come. She understood why, as his massive body pressed tight against hers. His weight was not enough to crush her, but to hold her still, as he positioned his cock at her entrance.

  Thinking straight was becoming harder thanks to her own overwhelming need to have him inside of her. “Condom,” she panted despite how wondrous it felt having his cock sliding through her folds. A child would only tie her to him in a way that wouldn’t be fair to anyone, least of all the child. His cock teased her entrance, the tip sliding in and out, a promise of what he intended, demanded… what she wanted.

  “Condom, Damien!”

  He flipped her over, dragged his finger through her pussy and then around her tight bud, coating it. Before she could even register what he was doing, he spread her cheeks and pressed the tip of one finger into her hole.

  She was holding her breath, inadvertently clenching her ass, until he swatted her behind, sending a delicious pleasure to her core. He used the distraction to slide in another half inch. He was working her hole, his finger sliding in and out, when he suddenly disappeared with a growl that sounded like, “Stay.” A single word, but she wasn’t going anywhere. He needed this. Hell, she needed this.

  After a quick thirty seconds of kitchen cabinets slamming open then closed and contents thrown to the floor, he was back, pouring a cool liquid that smelled like olive oil on her ass. Without a word, his finger worked her, easily sliding in and out. She’d relaxed enough, finally accepting that no matter what this was happening. He was going to take her, and she was going to let him, because they both needed it. After this, she could walk away without regret.

  Tess found herself moaning as one finger and then a second entered her. “Damien,” she said as two fingers moved slowly in and out, working her, stretching her. When she tried to lift her head to look at him, he pulled her hips off the ground, leaving her ass in the air. More oil and a third finger were soon added.

  She must have tensed, for he stopped moving. Then his other hand was by her pussy, fingers sliding in, filling her from both sides, drawing such sensations and emotions from her that she wasn’t sure how to handle them. If he had asked her to blood-bond at that moment, she would have said, “Yes,” because she knew she was meant to be his. That had to be the release of endorphins flooding her system.

  The moment his fingers left her pussy she felt the loss, a crushing loss as if he would never be hers. She couldn’t fathom the thought, let alone how she’d survive it. Then his cock was sliding into her ass, deliciously slow, sending pleasure through to her core. In that moment, he owned her, controlled her, and she wanted nothing else than for that to be true. She moaned, the sensations from him sliding into her, wickedly good.

  “My little shifter with the lost wolf likes to be controlled,” he said as he reached around and played with her clit.

  She closed her eyes, focusing on the sensation on both sides now, but especially of how good it felt to have his body wrapped around her, to have him inside her.

  “I told you I would have you, one way or another.”

  She knew this was his need to control talking, and for some odd reason, she clenched her ass cheeks to stop him.

  “Yes, that’s it. Fight me, Tess,” he said as he grabbed her ponytail to hold her still while he continued pumping in and out of her with a steady rhythm that had her pussy dripping. She had nowhere to move, except to back into him, which gave him what he wanted. He finally seated himself to the hilt, filling her, owning her. She was his, but she could never let him know it.

  “Tell me you want to blood-bond me, and I’ll fuck you nice and gentle like you deserve. Or say nothing, and I’ll take you hard.”

  “You’re already fucking me,” she said as he picked up the pace. She could feel the start of an orgasm, one she wasn’t sure she wanted, not with ultimatums.

  “Tell me you want me,” he said again, starting to thrust harder, faster.

  “I want nothing from you.”

  That wasn’t what he wanted to hear. He thrust into her so hard she hoped she wouldn’t split her in two. She wouldn’t beg him to stop, though. God help her, she was enjoying his roughness, his control of her body. He needed to dominate sexually, and she was letting him, but she would not give him what he truly wanted, her promise of a blood-bond.

  With his moans, a primal force within her awoke, and she finally understood her instinct to fight him. He needed her to fight, so he could dominate her and find peace with his wolf, if only for a short while. She’d give him this because it was the only release she could give him. She moved her ass from side to side, to throw his rhythm off, but that only earned her another strike to her ass and a very intense pounding that caused her to fall forward onto her chest.

  “Fight me, Tess,” Damien moaned as he released her ponytail, so he could hold her hips with both hands. She was utterly trapped, his thrusts so hard all she could do was moan and take the pounding. Yet it was freeing and exciting. When his fingers thrust into her pussy, her eyes rolled back into her head from the sheer pleasure. Too much sensation all at once, rising, pulling upward. Then he removed his hand.

  She was so tense, so needy and so helpless, she reached for her clit, but he pulled her hand away. “Need to come,” she said, panting heavily.

  “No,” he growled.

  “Bastard,” she screamed. He had brought her to the edge and left her hanging there, refusing to let her dive into that pool of bliss.

  “You. Are. Mine!” he said, his body slamming into her. “Say it!”

  He controlled every aspect of her body now, down to how and when she could orgasm, but she controlled their fate.

  “I can’t,” she cried as a huge orgasm tore through her entire body, locking her arms, legs, back, and her butt, making moving impossible while the energy coursed through her. Then she felt his cum spilling into her. She laid there, his hands the only brace keeping her up as he finished. When he pulled out, she sank to the rug on her stomach, spent, sated, and unable to move.

  His hands were spreading- wet and warm liquid on her ass and over her back. Damien was marking her with his cum. “You’re mine.” His voice was less frantic now, more like the Damien she knew, yet not entirely. His mien had changed, though she wasn’t sure how exactly. “Say it,” he demanded.

  “Not yours! Never yours!”

  And then he rose. Without a kiss to her back, her neck, or even her head, as he had always done when he touched her in the past. She rolled onto her side, watching him get dressed. He said nothing, and perhaps that’s because there was nothing more to say. He had tried to control her, to make her give in, and he’d failed. Alphas—and especially Damien—didn’t like to fail.

  He headed for the door, leaving her naked on the floor with a shredded bra and unusable t-shirt. “At least give me your shirt to wear. You ruined mine. Or do you expect me to run past your pack half naked?”

  “You said you don’t want anything from me. I’m complying with your wishes.”

  His words, and especially his eyes, were cold. That was all he said before he walked out the door, not even bothering to shut the door behind him. Suddenly, she felt empty, chilled, and utterly alone.

  After resting naked for a long time on the floor and replaying in her mind what had happened with Damien, Tess pulled herself up. She was sore, and no longer felt sated, just drained, physically and emotionally. As long as she was here in this camp, she’d never tear herself from Damien. He’d seek her out time and time again, and eventually she’d give him what he wanted because she wanted him as much as he wanted her. He was her other half, the part that she’d been missing her entire life.

  She pulled on her jeans, but there was nothing left of her shirt and bra. Tess roamed the house topless, debating her choices, before she realized finding a s
hirt would be a good start. She rummaged through Frank’s dresser, until she found a t-shirt that was on the smaller side, one that wouldn’t fall off her bare chest as she walked through camp back to Aloe’s. Laundry day after all. Shoot me now.

  She looked in the mirror at the t-shirt she’d donned. The bright red words against the black background—“What’s Love Got to Do With It?”—mocked her.

  One thing was clear, Damien hadn’t tracked her down to make love to her. He and his wolf had been highly agitated. He had come with a purpose of owning her, keeping her from walking away from him. He’s used every weapon in his arsenal and had been unable to make her cave. So, no, he hadn’t made love to her. He had fucked her, and it seemed to have calmed his wolf and him.

  Damien had finally walked away, as she’d been begging him to do for some time. Maybe now he would finally forget her and blood-bond Aloe to permanently tame his wolf. He’d finally know peace—even if it was with another woman. Tess wanted to curl up in a ball and never talk to anyone ever again.

  Tess left Frank’s house. Without glancing at any of the shifters she passed on the way, she made her way back to Aloe’s house, grabbed the clothing—which was easy considering it was all in one laundry bag—and headed back down to Frank’s. Tess didn’t particularly want to be where she and Damien had had sex, in a cabin that still smelled of him, but it was the last place Damien would show up. He was done with her; that was abundantly clear.

  As she passed the cookhouse, Tess spotted Frank and Blade returning to camp. They were covered in blood and carrying boxes marked with the WSSO’s logo, a pile of dead half-transformed shifters at the feet of a human. The logo made her stomach turn, but somehow the sight of the blood on Frank and Blade lifted her spirits for it meant they’d injured or killed some of the bastards who’d hurt her. At last, she’d found one positive element in her day.

  “Hey, Tess,” Frank said with a reserved smile. “Wait. Is that my shirt?”

  “Don’t ask,” she said as she let her laundry bag fall to the ground with a thud. “I’m moving into your cabin. You can stay or leave, I don’t care. I’ll take the sofa. And no, you don’t get to ask why I’m staying with you. If you have a problem with it, move out.”