by E Cleveland
“According to the radio, it’s just a short break.” His intense brown eyes meet mine. I feel like what we aren’t saying is more important than what we are. I can see him struggling with our impending reality as much as I am. Sooner or later this storm will be over, and we’ll probably never see each other again.
I distract myself with breakfast. I’m not ready to think about a life without Sawyer in it yet, but I’m happy to think about eating.
“What did you make?” I glance into the bowls and realize I was wrong about the porridge. It looks like rice.
“Oh, I made you today’s special, rice pudding. I’m pretty happy with how it turned out considering.” He holds his hand out at our surroundings and I nod. It’s amazing that he’s been able to make meals, let alone ones that taste as good as his do out here.
Sawyer hands me my bowl, grabs his, and we dig in.
The sweetness explodes on my tongue and I devour my bowl like I haven’t eaten in a week. When I swallow the last mouthful, I lick my lips. “Where did you learn to cook? It’s incredible what you can put together. If I was up here alone, I would’ve starved by now.”
I can see the glimmer of pride flash in his eyes. Sawyer places our bowls back on the little table and looks out the window like he’s looking into another time.
“My parents taught me, mostly,” he answers. “They owned a restaurant, Il Lupi, or The Wolf in English.”
“What language is that?” I tilt my head and scan Sawyer’s features. I’ve never detected any hint of an accent in his voice.
“Italian.” He doesn’t blink, still staring outside.
“Why was it named that?” Thunder rolls over his face and his beard twitches as he struggles to find his words.
“Because the restaurant wasn’t just my parents’—I pretty much grew up in that place. We celebrated our victories there. I had my first heartbreak there. It was the backdrop of our lives. Dad said that without the family, the restaurant was nothing, that we were what breathed the life into that place. He called it Il Lupi because we were so tight, like a wolf pack. We stuck together.” Sawyer frowns and swallows hard, flicking his eyes back to me.
“That’s beautiful,” I whisper. “Why did you leave then?” The words fall from my tongue before I have a chance to think them over. Obviously, if he wanted to tell me what happened, he would’ve by now. I look down at the patchwork on the quilt. “Sorry, I don’t mean to pry.”
“It’s okay. They died.” His voice is flat and hard. “Car accident.”
“I’m so sorry.” I lay my hand on top of his.
“Me too.” He looks up at me. Sawyer stands up and grabs the empty bowls from beside the bed. “Okay, well, speaking of food, I’m going to take advantage of this break in the snow and try to hunt for some more rabbit,” he says it too loudly, like he’s trying to overpower memories by yelling at them.
“Can I come with you?”
He stops in his tracks and looks over his shoulder at me. “Come with me?” He wonders out loud.
“Please? I can help you, or at least keep you company.” I realize my motivation is greedy. I know he won’t be lonely out there without me. He might be a lone wolf now, but I’m not. I can’t stand the idea of being here all day without him.
“What about your floppy-eared bunny and all that? You aren’t going to have a ‘Bambi’s mother’ moment out in the woods when I kill our supper, are you?”
“No, I already ate the stew you made. I know where it came from. I’m good. I might even be able to help,” I offer.
“I don’t know about that.” He smiles. “Sure, fill your boots. If you want to come, I’d love the company.” He walks over to the kitchenette and puts the bowls in the basin and I spring out of bed like he told me it’s Christmas morning. The truth is, I feel more excited than I have for any December twenty-fifth. Not because we’re hunting rabbits, but because he just told me what I’ve been longing to hear. He wants me around him. He doesn’t want to be alone. He said he’d love the company.
Maybe when this is all over there is hope for us after all. Maybe he’ll come with me and enjoy my company for good.
24
Elsie
“Was that a rabbit?” I almost topple over into the snow as I twist around to catch the tail end of a squirrel bounding over to a tree.
“No.” Sawyer keeps his jaw tight and keeps trudging forward.
“Is it weird we haven’t seen any yet? We’ve been out here a while.” I look up at the sky as if I’d have any clue what time of day it is by looking at the sun. Instead of guessing the hour, I get bright spots in my vision that won’t blink away.
“No, it’s not weird. The snowshoe hare molts and grows white fur for the winter, so they’re damned near impossible to see. Even brown rabbits are smart enough to hide under brush and around the base of trees. They know how to survive better than we do.” He keeps his voice hushed as he looks around the forest.
“Well, better than I do. You seem to be doing fine.” I smile.
“I spent some time in the military.” He looks at me like he expects me to react. His body is stiff, and he tilts his head as he waits for me to say something.
“Really? Well, that makes sense. Why did you leave?”
“I just needed to get away.” His voice is tense. I feel like there’s something he’s not sharing, but I don’t want to spoil our day by digging into a story he doesn’t want to tell.
“Anyway,” he clears his throat, his voice returning to normal, “even with my training, I didn’t start out my first year as a natural woodsman. It takes patience, a lot of it,” he admits.
“It sounds boring.” I shrug. “Don’t you ever get tired of how long it takes to do everything? I mean, don’t you miss having a microwave or ordering takeout food?” I try to imagine what his life must be like. Preparing food and keeping things working must take up nearly all his time. A few days ago, that would’ve sounded like the seventh circle of hell, right now it still doesn’t sound appealing, but not like the torture I thought it would be.
“No, I don’t miss it. Sometimes it’s hard work, but sometimes I sit and read all day. Or I go fishing. Or I cook. The work is harder, but I spend most of my days in nature, growing or hunting for the organic food you spend a fortune to get at the grocery store. I don’t need to spend my time coming up with woodworking projects for a hobby, my whole life is a Pinterest project.” He scoffs.
“You know about Pinterest?” My mouth drops open. I don’t know why, but I expected Sawyer to be too removed from modern life to know about girly Internet pages.
“I choose to live in the woods, Elsie. I wasn’t born here. I still know about things going on in the real world, if you want to call it that.” He looks at me and rolls his eyes exaggeratedly.
“Oh.” Of course, he knows about websites. He’s not completely shut off from society. I mean, when he saved me he was heading into town.
“Do you think we’ll find a rabbit soon?” I bring my focus back to the reason we’re marching knee deep in an endless sea of white.
“Not if you keep talking, chatty Cathy.” He smirks.
“What’s a chatty Cathy? Is that a show or something? Or just an expression?” I peer up at him and he sighs.
“I don’t know. I think it was a doll that never shut up and scared away rabbits.” He twists his lips downward and looks around the glistening forest.
The silence is eerie. I can’t hear anything except for our breathing. It’s a far cry from the endless buzzing of the city. The roar of the traffic. The chatter of friends. The constant dinging of people’s cell phones. “When you’re hunting rabbits, you have to be like Elmer Fudd, remember him?” He ignores my blank stare. “You have to be vewy, vewy quiet.”
I can’t help but laugh at the bad impression. “How old are you again? Chatty Cathy? Elmer Fudd? That’s before my time there, old man.” I giggle.
“I’m not old, I’m wise.” He smiles. I feel like I sipped some hot c
ocoa topped with marshmallows, all warmed up from my forehead to my toes.
Sawyer looks at the sky and the smile slips from his lips. “The storm is going to roll in really soon.” He looks back over the trail we’ve left in the snow, then back at the sky. “This old man is wise enough to know that we’re not going to make it back to the cabin before this gets bad.”
“What do you mean?” I bend my head back and stare at the snow tumbling down from the sky. “We have to get back.” I try to push down the panic rising in my chest. Did he save me just so I could freeze anyway?
“No, we need to build a shelter,” he answers firmly and shrugs free from his hiking bag, placing it at his feet.
A shelter? “Like, an igloo?” I’ve seen pictures of them, but never seen one in real life.
“Not really.” Sawyer pulls a small spade out of his bag and yanks on the handle, extending it out. “You see that huge drift there?” He points the retractable shovel at a thick mound of snow.
“Yeah.” I nod.
“We’re going to hunker down inside of that. I’m going to make a snow cave. It’s easier than an igloo, trust me.” He walks over to the snow bank and begins to carve out his plan while I stand and watch the sky darken and the flakes intensify.
Trust him. That’s what he said. It’s funny how, in reality, he’s still a stranger. I don’t know that much about him, really. If we’d met under different circumstances, we wouldn’t have given each other the time of day. And yet, I do trust him. I trust his judgment and I trust his character.
Now, if I could only learn to trust my own heart. Maybe I could figure out a way to keep him in my life.
25
Sawyer
The shelter surrounds us, keeping us out of the elements. However, our hunt was a total bust. There’s got to be a way to forget this hunger gnawing in my gut.
“Come here.” My voice is raspy as I pull her into me tight. I kiss her slowly, but deliberately, allowing my fingers to trail down the side of her neck as my kisses stray across her jawline and farther still, to her collarbone. She shivers in my arms, so I shield her from the wind by turning my back against the breeze swirling around us.
I can forget about my hunger by feeding my starvation for a taste of her.
As my fingers trail over the edge of her pants, I pull on the waistband, slowly inching it down over her plump, round ass. “No, wait, we can’t do this here! It’s too cold,” she weakly protests.
“Not to worry.” I continue tugging the hem away from her body. “I’ll warm you up. Besides, there’s no way I’m waiting until we’re back at the cabin to feel you. I need your body against mine. Right here. Now.” I yank her pants the rest of the way down and draw a thin, invisible line up the inside of her clenched thighs, pushing my fingers between them to her soaking wet center. I smile as her juices coat my fingertips, proof that she’s as turned on as I am right now.
I sink my fingers in my mouth, eager to lick her nectar from them. My mouth is thirsty for her sweet juices.
I wrap my hand around the back of her head, drawing her into my lips. I pull her bottom lip in with my teeth and give it a little tug, making her gasp with desire. Elsie abruptly pulls away, holding my gaze with her blue eyes, and makes quick work of removing her coat and peeling off her shirt, up over her head, in a single tug.
She stands as tall as she can manage in our secluded snow fort. I can see the heat of her breath cling to the air in a cloud of passion as she breathes quick and shallow. She shimmies out of her pants, wiggling her hips as she teases me. It takes all the restraint I have to stop myself from ripping the fabric clean from her body.
A long shiver licks her spine as she stands in front of me naked. She’s a vision. I quickly throw my parka on the floor of our snow cave and unbutton my shirt impatiently, cursing every stupid buttonhole. My pants are a pool of denim on the snow floor not even seconds later.
I wrap my arm around the small of her back and pull her toward me, leaning in and leaving a trail of kisses over her stomach down to the heat of her tight pussy that my mouth waters for. Her natural perfume is making me crazy, and I jab my finger between her wet lips and hold them open, staring at her clit as I lick my lips with anticipation.
Diving my face between her thighs, she giggles as my beard tickles the soft skin between her legs. However, her giggles quickly transform into moans as my tongue swirls from side to side, devouring her sweet juices. I wrap my hands around her round ass and hold her steady as I thrash my tongue over her clit.
Her moans grow louder as she rocks forward by pushing herself up on her tippy toes like she’s torn between trying to escape my tongue and chasing her pleasure. Sucking her clit in past my lips, I flicker my tongue over her sensitive nub relentlessly until her hands are twisting in my hair as her cries of passion are filling my ears.
Elsie slumps down over me, holding herself up by propping her hands on my shoulders. She’s panting in my ear as I feel the trembles of little aftershocks run through her smooth skin.
I’ve taken all the time I can stand. I need to feel her walls clench against me. I need to feel her milk me dry, like her pussy was designed to empty me of every last drop of my seed. To quiver against me as I fill it deeper and harder than she’s ever had before.
Twisting her around, I wrap my arms around her and press my rigid cock up against her bare ass. I let her feel the weight of my girth against her crack, grinding my hips forward. I tease her with what I could take.
“I can’t wait to fuck your tight little pussy again. I want to feel you cum on my cock.” I push her shoulders, lowering her so her hands and knees are on her fur coat. I know she’s cold, but I’m about to make good on my word to warm her up. The frosty nip of the cold on her extremities won’t even register when I’m done with her.
I hold my wide hand between her shoulder blades, kneeling behind her, and gently but firmly push her head down to the floor. Watching her soft, pale ass swaying has me transfixed.
No woman should be this sexy. It’s a crime against men’s restraint. I know I’m throwing mine to the wayside as I admire the rosy flesh exposed inside her lips. Pearly beads of desire have formed in her entrance, enticing me, exciting me. I can’t resist. Seconds later, I’m grabbing hold of my cock and teasingly sliding it up and down, just inside her pussy. I slip the head of my cock from her tight asshole to her clit, smearing her juices over my shaft with my hand as I jerk myself a couple of times.
Her nectar covers my cock, making it easily slide inside her to the core, despite how tight she is. She fits around me like a custom leather glove, her warmth surrounding me.
I fuck her like I’m trying to melt the snow and ice below us. She twists her ass, pushing back against me every time I bottom out inside her, giving me the deepest access to her center possible. Reaching around her hips, I make quick work of finding her sensitive nub hidden in her mound. Pressing just above her button, I move my finger in little circles, easily sliding with her natural lubricant dripping on my fingertip.
Suddenly, she stops moving. Her pussy clenches and trembles around my cock, milking it for my seed as she cries out my name to the forest. Even with the muffling the snow walls of this survival shelter provide, I’m sure every animal in a two-mile radius can hear her screams.
My balls tighten and clench as I slam my cock into her faster. Faster than I think I’ve ever fucked anyone. With her muscles bearing down on me, she feels as tight as a virgin against my thick girth. My balls tighten as I spill my cum into her, filling her with my seed.
When the last tremors stop and I’ve emptied my seed, I lean over her, lying still against her on the wet, cold floor. Neither of us seems to mind the noticeably frigid air swirling around us. The heat of our bodies warms the small space and I pull out of her, lying on my parka with her next to me, and cover us with her fur jacket.
This is perfection. I kiss the back of her neck. “I love you.” The words tumble free from my mouth before I have a chance to thin
k about them. My heart twists with fear that I’ve said too much, too quickly. Surely, she can feel my heartbeat rapidly firing against her back.
“I love you too,” she whispers. There’s no doubt in her sleepy tone. It sounds like the words she was born to say. Like they’re as true as the seasons and as important as the sun.
I let the breath I didn’t realize I was holding out and pull her in tight against me. My eyes feel heavy, but my soul is light. She loves me. Right now, this moment is all that matters. The thoughts I’ve had about whether or not she’ll return with me to my cottage evaporate and are replaced by one swirling, sleepy phrase.
“I love you.”
26
Elsie
My eyes flutter open and I can see a blue glow from our icy hut’s roof. It’s so peaceful inside this shelter with Sawyer, and so much warmer than I expected. Of course, lying tangled up in him, our naked bodies interwoven certainly helps keep the cold at bay. Not to mention all the other ways he kept my blood pumping all night. I’ve never met someone who can fuck me over and over until we’re both exhausted and barely able to utter a single word. He’s a beast. I let my fingertips explore the hair on his chest as I enjoy the silence.
My beast.
I never wake up before Sawyer. I must have really tired him out. I lean over and look at his masculine features. I love how his beard twitches when he’s all worked up. I love how he can be so grizzled on the outside but have such a warm heart. I carefully unwrap his huge arms from around me and shiver as I slide out from under the coats. The cold motivates me to dress quicker than I probably ever have before. I peel my coat from on top of Sawyer and wrap myself in it. I want to take a look outside and see if we still need to stay hunkered down, or if we can head back to the cabin.
I crawl through the small entrance and bump into something hard. Turning around on my belly, I see that it’s the rifle Sawyer brought. A flurry of movement catches my eye from outside and I look up and realize that probably ten feet from the entrance to our snow cave is a huge white rabbit.