by Chloe Blake
His frosty glare pushed her back a step. “Are you going to tell me after listening to Monroe speak, after what you’ve learned over the years, that you really believe that?”
Her sock-covered feet on the light beige carpet came into view when her neck could no longer support her head. Denial hadn’t lasted long. “No.”
“I’ll book us a flight back for tomorrow. You should prepare your letter of resignation. The bastards don’t deserve it, but you don’t want to burn any bridges.”
She hadn’t heard correctly. “What? Why would we leave tomorrow? The Singletons are coming.”
Large hands braced narrow hips. “What does it matter? We no longer have a job to do for the firm.”
Would he really leave the couple in the lurch? “We have an obligation to the Singletons. To let them know about what’s going on right in front of them.”
“Don’t be ridiculous, Kamilla. Warning them will mean you’ll be headed to jail when they go.”
Her nostrils flared. “I don’t appreciate you taking that condescending tone with me. And besides, the Singletons are innocent.”
“You’re not getting involved.”
She narrowed her eyes. “I don’t know who the hell you’re talking to as if she were a five-year-old, but I know it’s not me. You need to calm your ass down and think for a minute. The Singletons are not involved in this scam. You’ve met them. You know their reputation.” She threw her hands up and let them fall onto her lap. “There’s no one who loves America more than they do. They sent us a damn flag cake on the Fourth of July. And didn’t Mr. Singleton lose a nephew on 9/11?” She shook her head. “There’s no way I can believe they’d help terrorists in any way. Not at all.”
She’d leave out the part where her instincts told her they weren’t involved. He’d only laugh at her when she needed his support.
“We have no idea if the money is for terrorist activities.” Leonardo sighed. “But you’re right, they’re good people. At least from what I know about them. It still doesn’t mean we have to get involved or that we won’t report it.”
She swayed to the left with a sudden onset of dizziness. Leonardo caught her before she hit the ground, made her lie down and then encouraged her to take a drink of the water he’d brought earlier.
Scowling brows over concerned eyes met her gaze as a gentle hand stroked down the side of her face, leaving a trail of heat and awareness. If they’d left well enough alone, they could’ve been making love.
Instead they had to turn in the nicest people she’d ever worked with, she’d lost her job and there was a chance she’d have to go to court to testify. Wishing she could turn off her brain, Kamilla rested her head against the back of the couch and closed her eyes.
She shot straight up when an idea hit her. She ignored the spinning of the room. “We’re still their lawyers. Can’t we present the information we’ve found and let them figure it out? I’m sure they’d report their subsidiary that same day, if only to protect their own asses. Then we’d be out of the loop.”
Leonardo shook his head. “What you’re suggesting is too risky. I like being a lawyer. I’m damn good at it and no one is going to take my license away for collusion. I say we be the ones to report them.”
“Even though they’re most likely innocent? Their business reputation will be ruined.”
He shrugged. “Not my problem. Let the feds sort it out.”
She tapped her chest. “I can’t live with that. I need to help when I can.”
“And get yourself banned from the bar association in the process? It makes no sense.”
Had she really thought Leonardo had a heart? That he’d changed from the hard man she’d gotten to know over the years? She’d been a fool to believe it. No matter how much pro bono work he’d ever done, he was and always would be out for himself. She would’ve been better off staying away from him.
Wobbly when she got to her feet, she headed for her room.
He followed her into the short hallway. “I’ll arrange a flight for tomorrow.”
With her back to him, she tried to make sure her voice didn’t tremble but failed. “Make it for one, because I won’t be on it. I’ll be meeting with the Singletons. If not tomorrow then on Wednesday. They need to be made aware.” Then she turned to him. “I know you don’t care about anyone but yourself, but can you please give me two days before you turn them in?”
Pain flashed in his eyes as his head jerked back. Had she been wrong? Please let me have underestimated him.
“I love you, Kamilla, but you’re being unreasonable. Think about your future.”
A childlike temper tantrum took over as she stomped her foot in an effort to release the pain that had built up behind her chest. “Don’t you ever say those words to me again!” she said through gritted teeth. “You don’t love me, Astacio. You’re too self-absorbed to love.” She combed her fingers through her short strands. “For a moment I was fool enough to believe you.” To realize I’d fallen in love with you.
She backed away when he reached for her shoulder. He fisted his hand before dropping it to his side. “Because it’s the truth, Kamilla. But love isn’t blind. I can’t sit around and watch you ruin the career you’ve worked so hard for.”
God help her, she believed him and it tore her apart. What she wouldn’t give to fall into his arms and put everything behind them. No matter how badly she wanted to be with him, she couldn’t betray her conscience. “I can’t let them take the fall. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I didn’t do something to help.”
She’d been reaching for the stars when she’d thought they’d had a chance of ever being together. They were much too different. Where she cared about other people, he only sought to protect his own.
“I can’t believe you’re willing to do this!” Had his voice cracked? Did he realize they’d reached the end of their short relationship, too? “You have so much to offer the world, Kamilla. Don’t give it up. Don’t give up on us.”
She’d have a panic attack and cry her eyes out about losing the man she loved and her job on the same day. Later. “Nothing you say can change my mind, Leonardo. I know what I have to do. My gut tells me it’s the right thing, so I’ll follow it.” She studied the tightness around his eyes and mouth, which revealed his frustration. She swallowed down the tears threatening to choke her. “Have a safe flight home tomorrow. And take care of yourself.”
Hand shaking as she opened her door, she let herself in before he could say another word. Crumbling to the floor as a sob tore through her, one question roared in her mind. What have I done?
Chapter 24
Kamilla stiffened at the soft knock on her door in the morning. Did she need to hear him say goodbye or to tell her how stupid she’d be if she went through with meeting the Singletons. A second louder rap followed. “Open up, Kamilla. We need to talk.”
On principle of hating being told what to do, she took delight in not opening the door. Then she remembered she detested passive aggressive behavior even more. Slinking to the threshold, she refused to look into the mirror, knowing just what she’d see. A zombie-like shell of a woman with red puffy eyes. She didn’t doubt her nose held a pinkish tint to it.
Crying all night over something she should’ve known would’ve never worked out proved fruitless. On a normal day she’d run to the bathroom, splash water on her face and smooth down her hair. Maybe grab a sweater and swing it over her head to cover her face.
What did it matter if she looked awful since he’d be leaving her?
At the flick of her wrist, the doorknob unlocked and she opened the rich dark wood panel. Her gritty eyes went wide. He looked as bad as she felt, with a dark tinge under his eyes and unusually ashen skin. Her heart hurt for him. The decisions they’d made hadn’t been easy for either of them.
A tight frown appeared as his gaze roamed her face “
Can we talk?”
Body too heavy to hold up on her own, she slumped against the threshold. “I think we’ve said everything we’re going to. Neither of us will change our mind. Have a safe journey.” And a wonderful life.
As if he hadn’t heard a word she’d torn out of her raw throat, he reached for her hand and pulled her into the living room. Fatigue, not his energizing touch, made her follow his lead rather than resist.
When they’d settled onto the couch, he held her hand between both of his. She waited for a long-winded speech, but nothing came for a few moments.
“I can’t support your decision to inform the Singletons. Lord knows I wish I could, but I can’t. It’s not a good career move. Hell, it’s illegal in the sight of the law. If you go through with it, not only could they take away your license, but you could be fined and go to jail.” His eyes pleaded with her. “Please don’t take the risk.”
Sorrow stabbed her in the chest as she slid her hand out of his. He still didn’t understand and doubted she could make him, but she’d try. One last time with the absolute truth. “You are such an arrogant ass sometimes. You think everything is black and white. Stacked in neat little piles. Life is either a yes or no.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry to have to school you, Leonardo, but there are more grays and maybes out there than your judgmental mind can comprehend. And to be honest, I don’t blame you. I’d love to have grown up in such a straight and narrow type of world. It would definitely make a lot of things easier.”
She raised her hand to stop him from speaking when he opened his mouth. “At the age of twelve, on my way home from school, I got a strange feeling as if someone was following me. When I turned around, nothing looked suspicious. A few minutes later, this man pulled up beside me and parked his car.”
The memory glimmered in her mind as if it had happened yesterday. “The guy behind the wheel got out and without a word walked with me. My father had turned up for the first time since he’d left me.”
Leonardo’s mouth gaped. At any other time she may have been entertained by the surprised expression. Now she fought for his acceptance. “For four blocks neither of us spoke. When I reached the steps of my foster home, I turned, looked him in his eyes and said, ‘It’s okay, Daddy. I loved Mama, too.’ He sank to his knees and bowed his head low as if before a priest, seeking absolution.”
She swallowed hard and reached forward, just as she’d done that day and touched Leonardo’s shoulder. “I told him, ‘I’m happy. Better than when I was with you. I eat every day and there’s always someone around to help me. I’m not scared of noises on the street anymore because I’m never alone like I was with you.’” She swiped a tear from her face. “It hadn’t taken me long as a child to realize the gift he’d bestowed on me by leaving. He’d been too self-absorbed in his grief to know how to care for a young child. He dealt with it by drinking, which led to my neglect and near starvation. Leaving me had been the best thing he could’ve done as an ill-equipped parent. It told me how much he truly loved me.”
Leonardo ducked his head and rubbed a hand under his nose with a sniffle. “You came to this realization at the age of twelve?”
“Earlier, when I started hearing about the wretched things some of the other foster kids had gone through while they’d still lived with their parents or family members, I considered myself blessed that he’d come to the realization that he couldn’t take care of me.”
“It still sounds selfish.”
Kamilla shrugged. “Or selfless. Depends on how you look at it. I understand why you don’t want me to tell the Singletons. I do.” She inhaled a deep breath. “But I have to.”
He blinked at her. They’d come to an impasse. He’d never see her side of the chasm as anything good to cross over to. “Okay.”
“Okay,” she said past the recurring tightening of her throat as she stood, knowing he’d still leave her. “Have a safe flight home.” She ticked her lips up into a brief smile. “At least it’ll be peaceful without me trying to break your hand.”
With a wave she walked to her room with her head high and tears held at bay. She’d learned a long time ago that being the leaver hurt a lot less than being left. Not much of a victory, because in the end she’d be alone in the big gray world.
* * *
The sliced cucumbers she’d ordered and placed over her eyes had felt good until she’d started crying again and had to remove them. Damn him. Damn him for loving her, yet not being able to support her. Didn’t that reveal the depth of his love? As shallow as a few drops in a sink and worth nothing.
Then why couldn’t she make the pain in her chest go away or stop allowing thoughts of him to depress her. She’d never see him again. One day she’d look back and send up a prayer of gratitude for his decision. Today she’d let the agony rage through her and try to survive. Ragged after shedding tears all morning and afternoon, she’d gotten out of bed to get ready for the encounter with the Singletons.
No man was worth giving up what she believed in, even if she had to forgo his love. If things could’ve gone differently, she—
Stopping the thought, she outlined her lips with a red lip liner, which she filled in with a similar color matte lipstick to draw attention away from her eyes. Ha. Maybe she’d meant to match them.
The smile she displayed in the mirror wobbled as she blinked back tears. “No regrets.”
She glanced at her watch. Six o’clock. According to the agenda Monroe had given them, the Singletons always had dinner at their special table at this time. Had they even arrived? She’d been wallowing in so much self-pity that she’d neglected to sit in the lobby to catch their appearance.
Now she wished she could’ve gotten it over with in the afternoon, but she hadn’t been in her right mind. Still wasn’t.
She grabbed her attaché case, with their file tucked inside, and left her room. At the sight of Leonardo’s closed door, she stopped and fought the tears threatening. Damn him.
Principles. She’d do the right thing even if it killed her. A lifetime of relying on her instincts had never steered her wrong.
A short trip along the picturesque snow-cleared path and she stood in the dining room. Scanning the area, she searched for the older African American couple, who appeared to be more in their early fifties than their sixties. After a couple of minutes, she located them, but they weren’t alone. When she recognized the third party, every muscle in her body went limp and the attaché case tumbled to the floor. If she hadn’t caught herself by leaning against a railing, she would’ve, too.
Chapter 25
Leonardo had never understood the word empathy. How could someone share the feelings of another without being that person? After hearing Kamilla’s story about her father, the meaning had slithered into his heart and clawed.
Rather than taking his packed bags and leaving immediately to allow her to deal with the situation she insisted on placing herself in, he’d put on his coat, rented a pair of snowshoes and trekked the woods. The peace and solitude of the quiet environment relaxed him as he thought. And felt.
Throughout his life he would set goals and maintain a singular course to obtain them. Deviations had been unnecessary because of impeccable planning and timing. And then Kamilla slammed into his life and shook up his world. Now he noticed what he’d never dared to look at before. Could he have been wrong? A rarity, but possible.
If he were to testify on a Bible, he’d state what he knew to be the apparent truth. He didn’t think the Singletons had anything to do with the money laundering. So why hadn’t he been willing to side with Kamilla?
Self-preservation. Where she’d made her decision with her mind and heart, he’d done it with fear as the catalyst.
He’d always thought of himself as strong. Yet where he’d be classified as steel, she possessed the qualities of titanium mixed with diamonds, and yet still possessed enough flexibility for change
. Kamilla Gordon was a more powerful individual than he’d ever known himself to be.
After acknowledging how right she’d been, he’d hiked his way back to the resort and waited in the lobby for the Singletons to arrive. The time had seemed to drag on for days rather than sixty minutes. The whole time, he hoped Kamilla’s plan didn’t involve intercepting the couple before they settled into their room.
Once they arrived he had explained the extreme importance of meeting them and they’d escorted him to their room. If anything were to happen with this case, he, not Kamilla, would take the fall.
He knew he loved her, but being willing to give up his career for her proved to him, and hopefully it would her, just how deep it went.
Taking a sip of whiskey, Leonardo felt Kamilla’s presence before he saw her. When he turned toward the entrance, his stomach plunged to his feet. She appeared ready to fall, looking worse than in the morning, when she’d left him sitting in the living room. Had she taken their disagreement that hard?
After excusing himself from the couple at the table, he rushed to her side and grasped her elbow.
In typical Kamilla fashion, she snatched her arm away and bent to retrieve her bag. “What are you doing here?” She turned her back to the Singletons and scowled. “You were supposed to be on a plane to Cleveland.”
For the first time since making the dramatic gesture of self-sacrifice, he had doubts. Had he done the right thing by leaving her uninformed? Yes. She wasn’t the only one who could do right. “I didn’t go. Instead I caught up with the Singletons and told them what was going on with their jewelry company. Either they’re damn good actors or they really didn’t know anything about it.”
“Just like I said.” How had she gotten the words out through gritted teeth, and how come her smile of gratitude hadn’t appeared?