“Now tell me, how many of you have been to Violet before?” More than half the audience screams. “Very nice. How many of you have seen our drag show before?” About half the audience screams. “Ok, not bad, not bad. Do we have any Violet Virgins tonight?”
Two of the three little gays from earlier scream from the side of the stage while the little gay birthday boy in blue tries everything he can to hide his face.
Robin notices the three little gays from the stage. “Don’t hide little gay boy. We don’t bite… hard,” she cracks. “Well, we’ll get you up here in a second baby, don’t you worry, but the time has come… for our show. Are you ready?” The audience screams. “I said, are you ready?” The audience screams even louder. “This is… the Fish y Chicks!”
The song “Faded” by Zhu begins to play over the entire club as Momi approaches a female who is visibly excited for the start of the drag show. She taps her on the shoulder and the girl turns around. It’s Simone from the ice cream shop. “Hey! I thought that was you.”
“Oh hey!” Simone says slightly hesitant.
“Did you see Parker at the front bar?” Momi wonders.
“No, actually, there were a lot of people over there when I first came in. I heard one of the drag queens say ‘Come to the stage’ over the microphone, so I just came here instead,” Simone explains.
“I didn’t think you were gonna come. You didn’t text me. Did you have to pay? I could’ve got you in for free,” Momi questions.
“Oh no, I mean yeah, I was going to text you, but when I was outside, one of the bouncers just let me in for free,” Simone describes the situation
“Big guy, kinda looks like a Samoan Shrek?” Momi tries to decipher.
“Yup, that’s the one!” Simone giggles.
“Sam.” Momi is not surprised. “You’re hot, that’s why he let you in. He does that a lot,” Momi explains.
“Oh,” Simone responds. She thought she was getting special treatment.
“Oh, no, that’s not to take anything away from you.” Momi catches herself. “You ARE hot. I mean, look at you. Like really, look at you. How can you blame Sam? I’m just jealous because I wanted to be the one to let you in,” Momi spells it out for Simone. She gets really close to Simone and whispers in her ear “I hope you’ll let me in.”
Simone nervously laughs off Momi’s last statement and tries not to think too much of it. She looks back to the stage just as the curtain is parting. The audience goes wild as the Fish y Chicks begin their routine. The two girls stand next to each other as they watch the queens performance.
“Ok, see the one on the right? That’s Karmen Sense.” Momi gently touches Simone’s arm and begins to describe each of the Fish y Chicks. “She’s all body, no brains; a true blonde. The irony of her name, right? She’s the only trans girl in the group and she’s had a lot of work done to her body in the past year. Oh, here we go, you’ll see all of her new ‘assets’ in 3, 2, 1…”
Karmen tears away her outer costume to reveal she’s only wearing nipple pasties and a G-string underneath. The audience goes crazy. “She’s done enough blow and blown enough guys to win her a medal. She’s the newest to the group, but she’s not that new. Although, she be actin’ brand new some days; saying some racist ass shit.” Momi pauses. “Haole.”
“How-Lee?” Simone doesn’t know the word.
“White… basically. It has a deeper meaning in Hawaiian, but you can look it up later,” Momi educates Simone. “Ok, that one there, on the left, is Arita Bitch.”
“I like her name,” Simone chuckles.
“Yeah, apparently it’s a play on the phrase, ‘I’ll read a bitch’ and boy does she live up to it. She’s Portuguese, so she doesn’t shut the hell up,” Momi continues.
“Is that really a thing?” Simone asks.
“It is in Hawaii,” Momi responds. “See that big mouth of hers? It matches her big hips and it gets her into A LOT of trouble. I can’t tell you how many times Robin almost kicked her out of the show. She’s local, but her fair skin often makes people assume that she’s from the mainland... until she opens her mouth. Full-on pidgin.”
“Pigeon?” Simone imagines birds flying out of Arita’s mouth like a magician.
“Yeah, pidgin. You’ve never heard of it?” Momi remembers that Simone said she just moved to O`ahu. “Man, you really are new to the island, huh? Pidgin is our local version of English; broken English basically.”
“Oohhh.” Simone still wishes birds would fly out of Arita’s mouth.
“And last, but not least, the leader of the pack, the diva with the hot bod, who tucks her hot ‘rod’… Alexus Convertible.” Alexus, at the front and center of the stage, jumps into a split. The crowd roars and showers Alexus with dollar bills.
Simone laughs. “You’re kidding! A Lexus Convertible? Like the car?”
“Yup, that’s her, but she drives a Toyota Camry.” The two girls share a laugh. “She’s the Fish in the Fish y Chicks. She’s the Filipino Beyoncé, while Arita and Karmen are Kelly and Michelle. I’ll let you choose who’s who.” She winks at Simone. “She’s got a million followers on Instagram and it’s rumored that she’s going to be on the next season of that TV show ‘America’s Next Top Drag Queen,’ but no one really knows for sure.”
Simone watches the queens perform their opening number, bopping along to the beat. Feeling like this is the perfect opportunity, Momi grabs Simone from behind. With her hands around Simone’s waist, they groove together to the music. Simone, having never had a female embrace her like this, lets it happen. The two girls dance and get lost in the music, losing focus of the show that’s happening right in front of them.
Momi takes complete advantage of the situation by caressing Simone’s feminine curves. She presses her hips right up against Simone’s butt and smells the sweet scent of her hair. Everything is going according to plan until Momi leans in and kisses the back of Simone’s neck.
Feeling like she just woke up out of a trance, Simone comes back to her senses and freaks out internally. Instantly feeling uncomfortable, she creates an excuse to leave, “Uh, I just remembered, I gotta go.”
“What? But you just got here?” Momi says confused.
“Uh, yeah, I know, but, um, Casper’s at home… by himself… and I… I forgot to take him out to pee before I left, so yeah, I just…I gotta go check on him,” Simone says backing away. She awkwardly waves bye to Momi and heads toward the exit.
“Shit,” Momi mumbles to herself.
On her way out, Simone passes right in front of Parker’s part of the bar. “Hey!” Parker tries to yell over the music, but it’s too loud. Simone continues straight out the door, obviously bothered by something. Parker, not having any clue as to what just happened, chases after her. “Watch the bar,” he says to Chico on the way out.
Parker swings open the front doors in a hurry, almost hitting Malu. “Whoa! What the fuck, Parker?” Malu barks.
“Sorry dude. Hey, did you see a chick about yay high?” Parker gestures to the middle of his chest, “Cute, dark brown hair, big tits?”
“That’s literally every chick that walks in here, bro. Give or take the big tits part,” Malu comments.
“Blue dress, walking out in hurry?” Parker tries again with more information.
“Oh yeah, you mean her?” Malu points to Simone, who is getting into an Uber. She shuts the door and confirms her destination with the driver.
“WAIT! Parker yells trying to stop her, but before he can even start running toward the car, the Uber takes off. “Shit.”
Just then, Momi exits the club looking for Simone herself. She stands next to Parker and asks, “Did you see—” Parker cuts her off by just pointing at the car taking off. “Oh.”
“What happened?” Parker asks his girlfriend.
“Nothing. I didn’t do anything out of the usual,” Momi starts. “I just… kinda gave her the express track.”
“BABE!” Parker exclaims.
“Wh
at? Don’t get mad at me just because you didn’t get to sleep with another chick. I was doing you a favor. It’s not my fault she was a virgin or whatever.” Momi counters aggressively. She walks back into the club. Parker just shakes his head as everyone smoking outside looks at him.
Malu walks up to Parker and asks, “You ok?”
Parker nods, “Yeah, I’m good.”
“Chicks, brah,” Malu relates.
“Chicks, man. For real,” Parker sighs. “Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier to just be gay.”
Back inside, the Fish y Chicks continue to perform their number. Waiting for the show to finish so his go-go shift can start, Lopaka decides to watch the queens to pass the time. From the back of the audience, he observes the way the girls move, how they look and how they interact with the audience. He thinks to himself, I can totally do that, his thirst to try performing in drag starts to grow, and I would do a lot more too!
Finally getting over the hurt he felt earlier, Lopaka looks at his phone and shrugs. As expected, no new messages. Trying to stick to his new motto of “No expectations, no disappointments,” Lopaka keeps calm and carries on. That is, until he looks over to the back bar.
Just in front of where Kaleo is serving drinks, Lopaka sees Ryan flirting with another guy. Lopaka, deciding not to jump to conclusions, stays where he is and just watches from afar. He talks to himself internally, Ok, calm down, Paka. He hasn’t done anything wrong yet. I mean, he didn’t call me when he said he was going to, but PHYSICALLY he hasn’t done anything with this guy yet. Who knows? Maybe they're just friends? Maybe he’s a cousin? Lopaka watches Ryan as he starts to make-out with the other guy. MAYBE HE’S A TWO-FACED DOUBLE-CROSSING SLUT FACE WHO’S ABOUT TO GET HIS DICK RIPPED OFF!!!
Lopaka storms all the way over to Ryan and pushes him from behind. “Who the hell is this?” Lopaka gestures toward the other guy.
“Jeez, what the fuck, Paka,” Ryan quavers.
“Answer the question, Ryan. Who the hell is he?” Lopaka repeats.
“I’m gonna go.” The other guy turns and disappears into the crowd.
“He’s just a friend,” Ryan attests.
“Oh, a friend who’s tongue you just had down your throat?” Lopaka questions sarcastically.
“Calm down, you’re causing a scene.” Ryan looks around and notices that people are starting to pay more attention to the two of them than the Fish y Chicks on stage.
“Good, let them see! Let them see how much of an ASSHOLE you really are!” Lopaka is outraged. “I waited for you. I waited an hour and a half for your ass to text me, call me, send me a fucking letter… ANYTHING! But did you? No.”
“What are you talking about?” Ryan asks.
“Dinner ASSHOLE! We were suppose to go to dinner tonight, remember? Or were you too busy rimming that guys asshole like the asshole that you are. And to bring him to Violet of all places.” Lopaka scoffs. “You’re a real piece of work, you know that?”
“Hey, I didn’t think I’d have to spell this out for you, but here it is: We’re not in a relationship! That was you assuming that we were in one,” Ryan snaps back.
“You know what, Ryan…” Lopaka looks Ryan straight in the eyes, “Fuck. You. I’m done.” He walks away and heads for the entrance.
At that very moment, Momi returns back to the bar. Kaleo, having watched the whole fight happen, but having been too busy serving customers to intervene, finishes up with his last customer and tells Momi and Tisha, “I’ll be right back.”
“Tag team,” Momi says and high fives Kaleo as to say your turn.
Kaleo points at Ryan, who’s now standing alone. “Not cool, Ryan,” he scolds and then chases after his brother.
Outside of Violet, Malu and Parker are still chatting. As the two boys are about to walk back in, they see Lopaka running out in tears.
“Whoa, whoa what’s going on now?” Malu asks his brother, but Lopaka just runs right past them and hops into a cab quicker than they can comprehend. And just like that, Lopaka is gone.
“Damn. We got some fast taxis in Honolulu tonight,” Parker says half jokingly.
“What the hell was that all about?” Malu is completely lost.
A second later, Kaleo comes running out the front doors and yells to the other two boys. “Where’d he go?”
“He just left in a cab.” Parker gestures to the street.
“Can somebody please tell me what the hell is going on tonight?” Malu asks.
“Ryan made out with another guy,” Kaleo informs his brother.
“HE WHAT?!” Malu shouts.
“Yeah, he made out with this random guy, right in front of my bar and Lopaka caught him, so they got into this huge fight and I guess they’re over now.” Kaleo fills in the blanks for his brother and best friend.
Malu starts to head into the club with a determined look. “Watch the door,” he says to the boys as he walks away.
“Where are you going?” Kaleo asks, but Malu doesn’t answer. “Malu. MALU! Don’t do anything stupid, Malu!”
“I’m not,” Malu yells, and then mutters to himself, “I’m gonna do something smart.” He disappears into the club.
“What are you doing out here?” Kaleo asks Parker. “Taking up smoking?”
Parker laughs. “No. Although, I probably should right now.”
“Why? What happened?” Kaleo inquires.
“Nothing big. Momi and I just got into a fight over a girl.”
“Which girl?” Kaleo is interested.
“Just some girl we met earlier. Doesn’t matter, she’s gone now, so…” Parker exhales.
“See, you might as well just be gay,” Kaleo teases.
“I’m thinking about it at this point.” Parker jokes back. The two boys look at each other, then look away and chuckle. They both know, first hand, that Parker has had gay experiences in the past. They stand in silence for a minute until they hear the front doors swing open dramatically as Sam walks out.
“SAM!” Kaleo shouts and starts heading over to the entrance. Parker follows.
“It wasn’t me,” Sam jokes and throws his hands up to prove his innocence.
“Where were you?!” Kaleo asks.
“I had to piss,” Sam explains.
“We just got jumped by a group of Samoans!” Kaleo tries to fool Sam.
“What?! When?” Sam worries.
“Just now! And, they took Kaleo’s wallet.” Parker joins in on the fun.
“Yeah and they called us all a bunch of queers and took off in a taxi!” Kaleo elaborates.
“Yeah and they said ‘Sam is the biggest queer of them all!’” Parker exaggerates the story.
“Yeah and they said ‘Tell Sam we’ll see him at home,’” Kaleo overdramatizes.
“Aaaahhhh you fuckahs! You guys so lie!” Sam finally realizes they’re playing a prank on him. “How can any of that be? My family don’t even know what a ‘queer’ is. Plus, how can a group of Samoans fit in one taxi? They cannot even afford a taxi!” The three boys crack up.
“Alright, we better get back in,” Kaleo says to Parker. The two boys shake hands with Sam and head back to their respective bars.
Inside the club, the Fish y Chicks are still performing for a fully-engaged audience. They’ve already collected a bunch of tips in the short amount of time that they’ve been onstage. Ryan, trying to forget about the drama that just happened, searches through the sea of people to find his ‘friend’ that he was just making out with. Finally spotting him across the room, he waves to him and starts heading over. He makes it halfway before running into Malu.
“Sup Ryan,” Malu says to get Ryan’s attention
“Oh hey Ma—” Ryan starts, but before he can finish his sentence, Malu punches him right in the nose. Ryan falls back, but doesn’t fall down. The crowd of people gasp and jump back as if there was a snake in the middle of the room (even though there are no snakes in Hawaii). Woozy and in pain, Ryan grabs his nose, which is now bleeding.
Just as Ryan gets his nose bashed in, the Fish y Chicks finish their number. They hit their last pose and wait for the audience to go nuts… but it’s silent. The three girls are confused and slightly offended. They look down and realize there’s a commotion going on in front of the stage. Not knowing what to do, and not even exactly sure as to what’s going on, the Fish y Chicks leave the stage unnoticed.
“Oh my God!” A random girl says.
“What the fuck man!” A random guy shouts at Malu.
“Call the security!” Another girl says.
“He is the security.” Robin walks toward the center of the crowd. She shoots a sharp glance at Malu as to say, I’ll deal with you later.
Trying to break the awkward silence in Violet, Robin smiles a fake smile and speaks jovially into the microphone. “Alright guys, girls and everyone in between, the Fish y Chicks will be back to take your bucks after they fix their tucks. So, until then, grab a drink from your favorite bartender and let’s get this dance party started! HIT IT, DJ!” She motions to the DJ to turn the music volume up quickly.
She puts down the mic and puts down the front. Robin’s stern face says it all. She looks at Malu and then at Ryan, “Boys, my office. NOW!” The two boys look at each other with resentment like two elementary school enemies that just got busted by the principal.
Malu and Ryan enter Robin’s office and shut the door. Robin is sitting on her desk facing the door with her arms crossed at her chest. She’s been waiting for them. She throws Ryan an ice pack and asks, “What the fuck was that?!”
“Yeah, tell her, Ryan?” Malu taunts.
“You tell me! I don’t even know. I didn’t do shit to you! I literally was just walking across the room and then you fuckin’ punched me out of nowhere,” Ryan says holding the ice pack to his nose.
“You know why! No act dumb,” Malu says with a serious tone.
“I don’t care what happened. It is NEVER ok to hit another employee.” Robin speaks directly to Malu. Ryan looks at Malu with a smug look on his face.
On the Rocks Page 6