by Brynn Ford
In my head, I imagined she had added, “Sir” behind that, “Understood.”
I imagined she was mine.
It was a dangerous waking fantasy.
Chapter 4
Ris
"You're shaking, honey, come here," I said, pulling Desi into an awkward side hug with my one good arm just outside the courtroom doors.
It was the day of Vaughn's sentencing hearing, a week to the day after my accident, and Desi was a holy wreck. Her eyes were wide, muscles strained, trembling from head to toe.
I understood her anxiety. The stakes were high. I'd been clear with her on the reality of what we were facing. Vaughn's no contest plea to the aggravated assault charges could carry a sentence of as much as five years behind bars. She knew that he was more likely to be given a harsh sentence because of his priors of the same charge.
Frankly, I was anxious, too.
I stepped back as soon as I spotted Law heading in our direction, approaching from behind Desi. I nudged her shoulder, encouraging her to turn and face him as he got within reaching distance, his arms open wide and welcoming. He pulled her into his embrace and held her close as he kissed the top of her head.
"I was worried you weren't going to make it," Desi said with a sigh, a visible release of tension.
"I wouldn't miss being here with you for any reason."
"Where were you?" she asked.
He pulled her away and shook his head, "Just a business thing. Not important."
She nodded.
I grabbed Desi's hand, "Ready?"
"No," she said, "But we don't have a choice, do we?"
I gave a sympathetic look, "No, we don't. So let's go in there and be strong for Vaughn, okay? This is harder for him than for any of us."
She swallowed hard, “Okay."
The three of us entered the courtroom together and I lead Desi to the front bench row seat just behind the defendant's chair. Hazel and Milo, Vaughn’s sister and brother-in-law, were already seated there in the second row, newborn baby and two adopted sons in tow. Desi had introduced us briefly when we all had arrived, but they went in ahead of us so Desi and I could have a moment and wait for Law.
I had done this before, been this person before. I had walked the family members of my team's defendants to this very spot in the courtroom so many times before. I had said the same words, offered the same support and encouragement. But never had I felt what they were feeling so profoundly.
I could feel Desi's terror in the way she gripped my hand. She was afraid, truly afraid of what the outcome might be. I could only imagine her mind was running a mile a minute.
We only had to sit in tense silence, waiting for the hearing to begin, for just a few minutes. The jury door opened and the bailiff entered, Vaughn walking behind in handcuffs. I had brought in a suit for him to wear. I always brought in clothes for my clients to wear at their hearings as it made them more sympathetic to judges and juries. No one trusted a person in prison garb.
Vaughn looked sharp, mostly well groomed, though his beard was a bit overgrown. I inwardly kicked myself for not requesting a trim on the grounds of presentability for the hearing. All in all, he looked good. His tattoos were covered by the sleeves of his dark blue suit jacket and it was cut well, fitting him nicely. He scanned the room as soon as he crossed the threshold, undoubtedly looking for his wife.
Desi nearly jumped out of her seat when she saw him. I let go of her hand and put mine on her thigh, instead, to keep her still. I didn't need her to get emotional and cause a scene that could be costly for Vaughn.
Appearance was everything.
When Vaughn found her with his eyes, he smiled broadly, tragically romantic. He winked at her as the bailiff walked him to the defendant's table directly in front of us and unlocked the cuffs.
Desi and Vaughn's eyes never left each other’s, and the look of their love was so beautiful that I felt as though it might rip me down the middle.
My colleague, teammate, and friend, Carl, was standing in for me as Vaughn's attorney. I wasn’t well enough to stand in front of the judge with Vaughn, but I was thankful I was mostly back on my feet and could be here with Desi. Carl hadn't made a single decision without my approval, but I trusted him to stand in front of the judge and speak for me. It would have been a conflict of interest for me to do it anyway.
Carl stood to shake Vaughn's hand and I took the opportunity to stand Desi up quickly, tapping under her elbow. I stepped forward under the guise of sharing counsel with Carl, but with my hand on the small of her back, pushed her forward to give her the brief opportunity to hug her husband before the hearing began.
She understood without me saying a word and while I leaned in to say something to Carl, Desi swept in and wrapped her arms around his neck. Vaughn bent, squeezing her around the middle, kissing her cheek twice before taking a beat to savor the feel of her in his arms.
Dammit, these two and their perfect, naïve love.
I pulled at Desi's arm when I needed her to let go, and thankfully, she did without a fight. But not before Vaughn snuck in a quick kiss on the lips.
"I love you," she said, as I pulled her back to sit.
He mouthed the words, "Love you," and smiled at her with longing.
He looked beyond her and waved, presumably at his sister Hazel behind us before turning to take his seat. It was just another minute later when the judge entered the courtroom. Before long, it was time to know Vaughn's fate.
Desi's fate.
All of our fates.
Why does it feel like all four of us are being sentenced?
Like we’re all in this together?
Desi grabbed my hand and gripped it tightly as the judge entered and began the proceedings. I was so thankful I was able to push Vaughn’s hearing back a few days, not only so I could be here with Desi, but also so that we could get Judge Walker.
Judge Monaghan, who had presided over Vaughn’s arraignment, was a total prick. He never liked me, for some reason, and I knew he and Asher played golf together on occasion. I wouldn’t have put it past Asher to have played his manipulative hand there in getting him to deny Vaughn’s bail.
In any case, Judge Walker was our best shot at a fair, and hopefully lenient, sentence.
They read through Vaughn’s charges and affirmed his “no contest” plea. When they asked him to rise, I felt sick to my stomach.
I glanced over at Desi and it looked as though she was hyperventilating, her chest was rising and falling sharply as she took in short, rapid breaths. She looked panicked as her free hand landed on her heart. Law caught my eye from beside her and he looked simply heartbroken for her state. I understood it because I felt it, too. I had been scared for my clients before at sentencing, worried a corrupt justice system would fail them, but never had I been through something so personal.
Vaughn was being sentenced because he stepped up to save me. He’d been hot-headed, impulsive, and took his defense of me way too far, nearly beating Asher to oblivion. But in my eyes, he was a hero for standing up for me. I was grateful for what he did, but terrified for the price he’d have to pay for it now.
Please be lenient.
Please, please be lenient.
Judge Walker was a man of the law, but he was passionate about true justice. He knew the truth that I knew, that prison wasn’t a rehabilitation system.
It failed in that regard.
I knew that if Judge Walker saw the truth and honesty in Vaughn’s eyes, if he could know Vaughn’s contrition for his actions, he would be fair with his sentence.
“The court recognizes your right to speak on your own behalf, Mr. Cooper. Would you like to say anything for the record before I declare your sentencing?”
I had managed to visit Vaughn in jail the day before, despite my injuries and God-awful pain, to coach him through what he should say now.
“Yes, your honor,” Vaughn began, “Thank you for letting me address the court.”
Desi was a pulsing a
ura of nerves beside me.
“I’m aware of my actions that night and I take full responsibility for the physical harm and injury I caused to Dr. Asher Fallon. While it does not serve to excuse the extent of my violence, the actions I took were in defense of Ms. Christine Warren who was being harmed by Dr. Fallon. I acted initially in defense of Ms. Warren, with the intent to separate and neutralize the threat on her life. But my anger got the best of me and I let it win. Rather than subduing Dr. Fallon until police could arrive to take him, I took action and caused him harm.
“I am sorry for letting my anger get the best of me and for not making a wiser choice. But I am not sorry for acting in defense of Ms. Warren. I know my priors indicate a pattern of impulsive violence, but I implore you to consider all of the details of those events, your honor. In all cases, I did become more violent than I should have, yes. But I was always acting in defense of women I loved, women who were being harmed by truly despicable men.
“I cannot regret acting in defense of the helpless. But I do regret that I’ve let my emotions control my decision making in those events. I understand my responsibility to work on being better, to find ways to control my impulsiveness, to make better decisions in the heat of the moment. And I can assure you, your honor, that I will do that. I owe it to the court and I owe it to myself. But more than anything, I owe it to my wife. I refuse to put her through the pain of our separation ever again. She deserves better than this and I promise I will put in the work to make sure this never happens again. I am asking for leniency though I know it is undeserved. Thank you, your honor.”
I guess I’d been holding my breath.
Vaughn lowered to his seat, turning his head to look back at Desi. He gave a sorrow filled smile, one filled with fear for whatever sentence was about to be handed to him.
A sob broke free from Desi and I quickly wrapped my arm around her shoulder, pulling her tight into my side. Law grabbed her hand from her chest and held it in his lap. She took a deep breath to steady herself. When she pressed her eyes shut, it pushed out the tears that had welled up there and they ran down her cheeks. I leaned my head against the side of hers in a show of support.
I could feel her breaking and I held her tighter, hoping I could keep her from falling apart entirely.
“Mr. Cooper,” Judge Walker began, “I’ve reviewed your case files with care. All of the past and present charges issued against you are legitimate and fair given your violent actions. I want you to recognize that the court has been more than fair given your pattern of behavior. That being said, the circumstances of the case in question are unique. I must take into account the actions of the victim that led to your violent outburst. I also feel compelled to consider the actions of the victim pursuant to the assault you committed. As I understand it, he has continued his own attacks on Ms. Warren’s life. In light of this information, I am inclined to issue a sentence designed to be punitive of your excessive force and violence while taking into consideration that you were provoked to act in self-defense of someone who was unable to defend herself at the time.”
Less than five years.
Less than two years.
Please, please, please.
“Mr. Cooper, please rise for sentencing.”
Vaughn cleared his throat and pushed to his feet, straightening his jacket.
“I can’t,” Desi whispered, “I can’t take this.”
“I’m here for you,” I whispered back.
“On the charge of aggravated assault and battery on the night of December 31st, 2018, the court sentences Vaughn Cooper to six months in county jail minus time served, followed by one year of probation, mandatory weekly counseling, and group anger management sessions to be attended bi-weekly during probation. I sincerely wish you and your family the best, Mr. Cooper. Adjourned.”
We all rose with the judge as he left the courtroom before chatter broke the silence wall around us.
Words couldn’t describe my relief.
I wanted to jump for joy at this sentencing. Vaughn turned to face us, smiling broadly. I stepped forward and pulled him into a hug with my one good arm before the bailiff came over.
“This is better than we could ever have hoped for,” I told him.
He kissed my cheek, “I can’t fucking believe it. Thank you, Ris, thank you. Home in less than six months.”
We were all thrilled at this outcome, but Desi was crying. It was an excellent outcome from a sentencing standpoint, but for her, it meant another six months of separation, another six months without her husband, another six months of hell.
She pushed forward and I moved out of the way so she could grab Vaughn, holding on tightly around his neck.
“I love you,” she said, “I love you so much.”
“I love you, Holly Blue,” Vaughn melted in her hold.
He bent to capture her lips, kissing her with all the passion and pain of a man in love about to be taken from his girl. His forehead wrinkled with the seriousness of the moment, his face showing the hurt he held for the both of them.
The bailiff appeared and their kiss ended as his arms were pulled behind him to be cuffed.
Desi wiped at her cheeks, “I’m yours, V.”
That twisted a dagger in my heart for them.
“I know, baby. You let Law and Ris take care of you, okay? It’s only six months, baby. Only six months. I’ll call you tonight.”
Desi forced a smile for his benefit and nodded, “We’ll talk tonight, baby,” she blew him a kiss and then he was gone.
* * * * *
Law brought our coffee orders back to the table in the corner we got at a nearby coffee shop. Desi had finally stopped crying but she was stuck in her head, understandably so.
“Thank you,” I smiled at Law as he sat down beside me.
“I know I should be glad. I know it could’ve been so much worse, but six months still feels like a damn lifetime.”
I nodded, “It will feel that way until he’s home, Desi. But the important thing to remember is that he will be coming home to you. So much sooner than I thought.”
“Tell me the truth,” she asked me, “How much time did you think he would get?”
“I thought he might get two years given his priors. I think it really helped his case that Judge Walker knows me. It’s unfortunate that social politics plays a role in our justice system, but in this case, I’m glad it did. Judge Monaghan is a real piece of work. I still can’t believe he denied bail at Vaughn’s arraignment,” I shook my head, “I just know it in my gut that Asher pulled some strings there just to spite me,” I sighed, “It doesn’t matter now. I know it’s still gut wrenching for you to know you can’t be with your man for another six months, honey. That hurts me, too. But honestly? I want to jump for joy right now and I kind of feel like we should all be celebrating.”
Desi looked down at her coffee, “Two years would’ve been,” she sighed, “God, I can’t even imagine that long without him. Vaughn and I haven’t even been together that long,” her eyebrows rose, “He’ll be out in time for our first wedding anniversary. Right? I mean, it’ll actually be less than six months with time served, won’t it?”
For the first time all day, she smiled genuinely.
“When is it? Ris and I will throw you a party,” Law said.
I grinned at him, “A kinky party at Black Ties?”
“Hell yes,” he smirked at me and his hand landed on my thigh beneath the table.
I hadn’t expected his touch and it sent a spark of electricity straight through to my core. I’d been on edge all day and there was something comforting, familiar, fire-starting about the warmth of his hand on me. Inadvertently, I angled toward him, inviting and welcome to his presence.
His eyes found my lips and I saw a flicker of confusion there. He pulled his hand away in a snap. It was strange that he had. He’d never felt discomfort from touching me before, even as friends. For crying out loud, he’d played with me in front of Asher before.
“Independence Day,” Desi said, “So I would expect fireworks.”
“Oh, I’m sure you’ll get fireworks at Black Ties with your husband on your wedding anniversary. Probably not the kind you’re talking about,” I laughed, “But way better. He should be getting out pretty close to that time, so it’s definitely something to look forward to, hon.”
I could feel Law’s eyes on me, so I turned to look at him. I caught him smiling at me and it gave me this sudden, singular awareness of his presence beside me. I didn’t know how to take it when he cleared his throat and looked away, turning his attention back to Desi.
“Let’s talk about your living arrangement, Blue.”
“What?” she replied.
“Now?” I scolded.
Law nodded and returned his hand to my thigh without looking at me. It felt heavy and hot.
“Yes, now. I found someone who needs a sublet, so I’m making arrangements to move you in with me next Wednesday.”
“Next Wednesday?” Desi and I both said in unison.
“He needs immediate occupancy. You can’t afford to stay there alone for the next six months while Vaughn’s in jail.”
Desi’s brown eyes were wide, trying to take in all the new information that had been thrown at her over the past several hours.
“I…I don’t know…” she hesitated.
“What don’t you know? Vaughn asked you to do this. I’m telling you we’re doing it. So, it’s happening. End of discussion,” he sipped his drink and his fingers squeezed on my thigh.
A wave of wanting rolled through my stomach.
What the ever-loving hell is happening?
Desi looked back and forth between me and Law, but her eyes finally landed on mine, pleading for someone to tell her what to do about this. With Law’s hand gripping my thigh and his heat pressing against my side, I was left completely powerless to argue against his wishes.
I could have.
If I really wanted to.
That moment found me wanting to submit to his wishes.
“He’s right, Desi,” I agreed, “You can’t afford to stay there alone. It makes sense to move in with Law. Take the money you would’ve put toward rent and save it for when Vaughn gets out. You’ll have a tiny nest egg to help get him back on his feet then. I’d take you in myself, but with mom and Callen here taking care of me, there just isn’t the space.”