by Brynn Ford
"It's too personal."
"It's too personal?" he chuckled.
He let his hands fall to my thighs, trailing upward, gripping my hips, and pulling me toward him to the edge of the desk.
"It's too personal for me to kiss you, but you'll let me fuck you?"
"Kissing is far more personal than fucking, honey."
He tossed my hair over my shoulder and ducked his head, pressing soft lips to the crook of my neck, "So this is okay?"
Oh, God. Oh, God. Oh, God.
I haven’t felt like this, so wanted, in a long damn time.
I exhaled softly, tilting my head to give him better access, "Yes, Sir."
He kissed his way up the side of my neck to my ear lobe, "All of this is okay?" he murmured, lips moving down my jawline toward my chin.
"Yes, Sir."
He hooked his thumb over my bottom lip, pulling it down and forcing my lips to part. A sensual gasp rushed out of me on exhale.
"But you're going to deny me the privilege of kissing these perfect, soft, pink lips?" he licked his own lips, staring at my mouth, and I nearly wanted to cave.
"That's correct, Sir."
"Hmm," he considered.
His fingers drew from across my hip, along the top of my thigh, and in between my open legs. Two fingers stretched down and dug in over the fabric of my comfortable sweatpants, pushing hard against my pussy.
"But will you let me kiss you down here? " he asked, his chest rising and falling in rapid breaths.
I nodded, "Yes, Sir."
He shook his head, "I really don't understand this limit, but I'll respect it.
"Thank you, Sir."
He wiggled his fingers against me, "We need to make up this contract. But, fuck, now I just wanna play with you, Angel."
I was feeling a little breathless at his touch. I wanted to play with him, too, but I was a strong advocate of getting the work done first so I could focus on the joy of play.
"I wanna play with you, too. But it'll be more fun if we wait. If we get the work done. Talk to Desi and Vaughn about it. Set up a proper scene. Let's do it the right way."
He tilted his head, "I was always impressed with your level of discipline and self-control, sweetheart.”
He swiftly lifted his hand and shoved it down my pants, pushing down hard and finding my entrance. He dragged his middle finger across my pussy, pressing inside just enough to tease me as he gathered dampness already pooling there for him.
I jolted at his sudden touch and moaned in wanting.
His touch ended as swiftly as it began. He pulled his hand back out and brought his finger, now glistening with my wetness, to his lips, sucking it clean.
"You're right, we should do this the right way. I just needed to see how wet you were for it."
My head fell back and I chuckled at the tease, "You're a sick bastard, you know that?"
He smirked mischievously, "Yes, ma'am."
Fuck.
Get on your knees for me.
"That sounds so good coming from you. Do you want to put a provision in the contract for you to play submissive for me, too?"
"I'm no submissive. You know that."
I conceded, letting it go since he was at least allowing me the ability to switch and play both dominant to Desi and submissive to him. The best of both worlds with two people I absolutely adored.
"Let's get it in the goddamn contract then, honey.”
I slipped off the desk and moved across the room. I lowered to sit on the leather loveseat by the back wall that was lined with books from floor to ceiling.
The physical separation allowed us enough focus to work through the logistics of a complex contract, but the energy still sparked and sizzled throughout the space between us.
He sat back down behind the desk as I settled in comfortably, “While we’re on the subject, Angel, talk to me about birth control.”
I curled a leg beneath me, “I can’t get pregnant. I got my tubes tied last year.”
He straightened, looking over the top of his laptop screen at me, “What?”
“Tubal litigation, sweetie.”
“I knew you didn’t want kids, but that seems odd at your age.”
“I don’t think so. Besides, it seemed like the right time since all of my birth control pills kept going missing.”
“Did you misplace them?”
“I may thrive in chaos, but I’m not that disorganized. They went missing. And so did the replacement pack. And the next. Not really a coincidence.”
He pursed his lips through a frustrated smile of acknowledgement, “Asher.”
“Asher,” I confirmed.
Law ran a hand through his hair, “But why would he take them? He never wanted a family.”
“No,” I replied, “But getting me pregnant would have been a mighty fine way of locking us together for the rest of my life. He wanted to control me in every way he could. So I took the control away from him and went in for voluntary sterilization.”
His brow dipped in consideration, “There’s more to that story, isn’t there? You wouldn’t just go and get your tubes tied like that.”
I shook my head, “I’d really rather not get into it.”
He stood abruptly, but didn’t move, “Tell me. You can’t keep secrets from me if we’re going to be contracted. I won’t allow it.”
He stared me down and I found that I really couldn’t deny him when he looked at me that way. That way that said, “I’ll tear you to pieces to find the truth and you’ll enjoy it so much you’ll want me to rip you to shreds again every time you mend yourself.”
I sighed, “You know how I like to drink chamomile tea before bed?”
“Yes.”
“Asher was putting crushed up sleeping pills in my drink.”
“Shit.”
“It happened for a little over a week last year before I realized it,” I hesitated, then pushed through, “I was waking up wet in the morning, down there.”
His face tightened in anger and he kicked his rolling chair back, “Fuck,” his hands dug into his hair as he spun all the way around, finally stopping to face me again, “He was fucking raping you in your sleep?”
I swallowed, not surprised by his reaction, but shaken by it.
I nodded, “Yep. But I don’t remember anything, of the act, I mean.”
His hand came to his mouth, resting there for a beat before swiping away the look of shock on his face. When he spoke, it sounded as though it was more to himself than to me.
“That evil son-of-a-bitch. The fucking Devil trying to destroy my Angel.”
My Angel.
I inhaled and the air got trapped inside my lungs when he said that.
My Angel.
It took me a moment, but I finally exhaled and waved a nonchalant hand, “In a really fucked up way, I suppose it was good on some level that it all happened. When I realized what he’d been doing, it got me to the doctor in time.”
“In time?”
“I went in to see my gynecologist about getting an IUD. I knew that was one form of birth control he couldn’t mess with. That exam was how I found out that I had ovarian cancer.”
His face went through the entire range of human emotions, but he remained still, unmoving, not speaking.
I went on, “I knew I was never going to have kids and I didn’t want to go through the chemo. The doctor was confident that removing the ovary with the cancerous tissue would work, so, I went for efficiency and had them do tubal litigation on the other side while they were at it.”
He still hadn’t spoken a word. He just watched me. His forehead crinkled as silence fell between us.
“I’ve never told anyone about the things Asher’s done to me, how his actions have impacted so much of my life,” I swallowed, looking down at the floor, “It’s been a lonely couple of years for me, Jasper. I just want to move past it.”
I looked up to see him coming toward me. He held a hand out to me and I took it. He pulled m
e to stand in front of him, putting his hands on my cheeks.
His blue eyes met mine, “I am so, so sorry, for everything that happened to you,” he sighed as his hands snaked around behind me, pulling me into a close embrace, “And I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you through it all. But he can’t hurt you anymore and I’m here for you now.”
I hugged him back, “Thank you. Really, thank you, Sir.”
I fought to steady my breathing as he held me for minutes, but there was no point in trying to hide my reactions. He could feel my heart thudding against my ribcage for his closeness. We both felt the natural lust that swelled between us, as it would with any two attractive people who held each other this way.
Any two.
Not just between us.
Right?
We parted after a few minutes and got back to work on the contract. I felt better focusing on the logistics of a complicated power exchange relationship. It also helped to start looking forward to all the sexy possibilities with Law that were to come.
Fuck Asher.
He doesn’t get to take up space in my mind here.
I challenged myself to put the creep out of my head and focus on my future, and for the time being, it worked.
Two hours of sly, sexy smiles and suggestive comments passed and we had drafted a contract that would satisfy all of our needs fully.
Law and me and Desi.
The dominant, the switch, and the submissive.
Chapter 12
Ris
I slept in Desi’s bed that night since she was soundly asleep on Law’s couch. Early that morning, I awakened to the bed shifting beside me and the soft, sleepy moans of sweet Desi settling in beside me. She’d brought her pillow and bed comforter back upstairs with her and hugged it around herself snuggly, pulling it up under her chin. Law had given me a blanket from his room, but I tossed it off and lifted Desi’s comforter instead, scooting beneath it and cozying up beside her.
This girl truly had become my best friend. She took that spot with the way she cared for me in the hospital. I had lots of visitors during that time, friends who had come by to wish me well, brought flowers or balloons, told me, “Let me know if you need anything.”
They were all kind and meant well, but none of them did for me what Desi did. She spent nearly all her waking hours by my side. She entertained me with girl talk, brought me magazines, went to my apartment to gather my beauty products, comfortable clothes, everything I needed.
She helped me with my makeup and hair, knowing it was important to me to keep up appearances, even during my healing. Never once did she judge or question me for it, even though Desi wasn’t much herself for excessive daytime grooming. She didn’t need it at her age, anyway, but as I told her, the further you get into your thirties, the more imperfections you’ve got to hide, and it probably just gets worse from there.
In any case, she was with me through it all, no questions asked. She was loyal to me, kind, concerned, helpful, doting, and because of that, there was no doubt in my mind she would be my best friend forever. I also knew that because of that, she would probably make the best submissive I’ve ever had. I just knew I needed to be careful with her because I wouldn’t allow anything to harm our friendship.
“Morning,” Desi murmured.
“Hey, sweetie, you sleep okay?”
She nodded a little, “Yeah, but I have a headache. Think I drank a little too much.”
“You probably did,” I agreed.
“Did I fall asleep first?” she asked, pressing her eyes shut and rolling to curl up on her side next to me.
“Yep. You left me and Law all alone.”
Desi’s eyes snapped open and met mine, “What does that mean? Did something happen between you guys?”
I chuckled, “Maybe a little something happened, but not exactly what you think.”
“What do you think I think happened? Maybe it’s exactly what I’m thinking? Oh, my God,” she groaned and closed her eyes again, “It’s too early for this level of excitement.”
I smiled, “Go back to sleep, honey, I promise I’ll tell you everything when you wake up.”
“Promise?” her voice was quiet, already drifting back to sleep.
“Promise.”
When Desi and I got up a few hours later, Law was still asleep. Normally, he worked nights and slept during the day, but since taking time off to be with me and Desi, his sleeping hours were a little unpredictable.
I showered and dressed, changing into a simple, comfortable yet stylish, navy blue shift dress from my overnight bag. Desi blow dried and straightened my hair at my request, my little way of shifting her into sub mode to be more open for the conversation ahead. I still couldn’t lift my left arm very high without discomfort, anyway.
I encouraged Desi to put in a little more effort grooming herself, knowing we’d be discussing the contract with Law that evening. I knew he’d want us both looking our best and I was eager to please, so I had to make sure Desi was at her best.
I think she had an inkling of what was up when I picked out clothes for her, a pair of dark skinny jeans, a silky black blouse, and cute black ankle boots. She protested initially when I told her I didn’t want her wearing one of Vaughn’s oversized shirts to dinner. It was all she’d been wearing since he was arrested. But eventually she conceded, or more appropriately, I should say she submitted.
Downstairs that evening, I coached her through making Law’s favorite dinner. At least, it was his favorite dinner when I was his. Over two years later, his tastes may have changed.
By the time Law had woken up and come downstairs, we had dinner on the table. He was wearing a sharp black suit, white button down, open at the collar without a tie, and sleek black, dress shoes. Law always looked like a goddamn runway model and he looked better and better as he aged. I silently cursed him for that because I got drier skin and wrinkles as I got older.
I met him at the bottom of the spiral staircase, leaving Desi to sit at the dinner table alone and wonder what the fuck was going on.
I gave him a pleasant smile, “Should I tell you good morning or good evening, Sir?”
He pulled me into a hug, wrapping his arms gently around my waist, sparing my bruised and healing ribs, “Good anything, Angel. Any time of day is good when I get to see you.”
Aww.
“Always the charmer, Sir. Thank you. We made you dinner.”
“Smells great.” he looked over at Desi, sitting quietly at the table with her back to us, “Did you tell her without me? She looks awfully submissive over there.”
“That’s just because she’s awfully submissive when she’s vulnerable, Sir. I haven’t told her anything, but I think she senses something is up. I made sure she looked pretty for you.”
He grinned, “Pretty for us. Don’t forget, she’ll be yours, too, if she agrees to our terms.”
I nodded, “She will. She needs this, Sir.”
He kissed my cheek, “Let’s have dinner and discuss. Go. Sit. Eat.”
“Yes, Sir,” I agreed, going to sit across from Desi at the table.
Law followed behind, taking his seat at the head of the table, me and Desi at his right and left.
The moment we’d settled quietly into our seats, Desi spoke, “Will someone please tell me what’s going on? What happened with you two last night? Why are we being so formal?”
“We have a lot to discuss,” Law said, “But please, go ahead and eat. Both of you. We’ll talk while we eat.”
“Yes, Sir. Thank you, Sir,” I said, picking up my steak knife and slicing into the perfectly cooked meat.
Desi looked back and forth between the two of us, the room silent aside from the sound of utensils clanging against porcelain dishes.
“I feel like I’m in a horror movie right now and you’re about to tell me this steak is made from the flesh of my brother or something,” Desi said with a grimace.
I scrunched up my face in disbelief that she’d just said that out l
oud, “You don’t even have a brother.”
“That’s not the point –” she shook her head, looking down at her plate, “Nevermind, sorry, that was weird. There’s just a weird vibe here right now and I just went on ahead and took us right on down into Awkwardville.”
“Des,” I said, fighting my smile, “Be quiet, sweetie. Just eat.”
She sighed and nodded, “Yeah, that sounds like a good idea.”
Law grinned at me then spoke to both of us, “Ris and I have something we’d like to share with you.”
Desi’s mouth dropped open as she gaped at me, “Are you his again, Ris? Oh, my God, are you his?” she looked equally shocked and excited.
I granted her a small smile of acknowledgment but didn't look up from my plate. I was still suffering pain throughout my left arm, both from the dislocated shoulder that was still healing and from a solid bruise that had formed along the inside of my wrist. It was some kind of miracle that I hadn’t sprained or broken my arm. I struggled to grip my fork and Law picked up on that right away.
"Give me that, Angel," he held out his hand and I gave him my utensils, pushing the plate over to him as well.
"Thank you, Sir," I said.
He graciously cut my food for me with a smile and a wink, “Come here,” he told me, “On your knees.”
I rose from my seat without a moment’s hesitation and lowered to my knees at his side. He turned toward me in his chair, gathering a bite of steak onto my fork.
“Open your mouth,” he ordered, and I did.
He fed me the bite and I bit it from the fork slowly, granting him a smile of gratitude as I chewed.
Desi was still as a statue, "Shut the front door. What is happening?"
He turned toward the table again so he could address Desi while I finished my bite, "Ris and I drafted a contract last night after you fell asleep. But it's not exactly what you're thinking. You know we both love you and care about you very much. We both want to see you grow, heal, become the strongest version of you possible. We also want to prepare you as a submissive for your husband when he's released. You both decided you wanted to live this lifestyle but know very little about how it all works in real life. We want to help you."