Learning to Trust

by Ruth Logan Herne

“My mother never got to see me graduate. She died my junior year of college. But if she can see me now, I hope she’s proud. And on a final note, I didn’t mean to lie to the board or the selection committee.” She added this with an aside to a high-school teacher on her left, a man who served on the interview committee.

  “Sealed records are supposed to be kept secret and I never dreamed it would come to light. I apologize if that seems dishonest in any way. I can assure you it wasn’t meant to be and that’s what brought me here tonight. It’s better to be known for the truth than maligned for half-truths. If you have any questions for me, I’ll do my best to answer them at this time.”

  Just as she began answering questions, his phone buzzed.

  Got to see you. Meet me at Walker and Park.

  Renzo never asked for something like this unless it was critical. Tug texted back. On my way.

  He wanted to stay and talk to Christa.

  He couldn’t, and he left that room feeling like a jerk for his quick reaction the previous day. He needed to talk with her, ask for her forgiveness, because a man who prided himself on helping teens find a righteous path should have had more empathy for her history.

  He’d fix it. Somehow, someway, he’d fix what he’d messed up because she deserved someone who would stand beside her in thick and thin, and he wanted to be that someone.

  He pulled into a parking spot on Park Road and got out of his car. Renzo’s truck was two spots up. He came Tug’s way, looked around to make sure they were alone and handed over a picture of Danny Adams.

  Tug looked at the picture, then Renzo. “What’s this for? I know who Danny Adams is.”

  “Meet Mark Adams, Danny’s identical twin brother,” said Renzo. “And Mark has things to tell you. First thing tomorrow, we’re going to the drug treatment center in Ellensburg to meet him, because Mark told me that Danny isn’t Jonah’s father. He is. And he says he’ll swear to it in a court of law because Danny doesn’t want Jonah to raise as his own.”

  “So Danny’s his uncle?” Tug frowned. “He’s still family and the judge might still go that way.”

  Renzo’s expression went hard and flat as he continued. “Mark told me that Danny doesn’t want Jonah for himself. When I explained the situation, he said Danny is trying to fulfill an arrangement he had with Marta before she died. An arrangement to hand Jonah over to a barren Louisiana couple for a very large sum of money, a deal that was arranged several months ago. A deal that Danny Adams is trying to close by pretending to be Jonah’s father.”

  Tug’s gut twisted. The thought that anyone could be that heartless and greedy wasn’t just appalling. It was sickening. “How’d you find this out?”

  “Things weren’t adding up,” Renzo replied.

  Tug understood because he’d felt the same way.

  “So I dug further, and when I turned up a brother who was here, in rehab, I wanted to talk to him. Imagine my surprise when I walked into the house and there was the exact image of Danny Adams sitting at the kitchen table.”

  “He’s sure he’s the father?”

  “Absolutely certain. His brother wasn’t even in the area nine months before Jonah was born. And that’s another thing,” Renzo told him. “The boys’ birthdays were altered to make them seem younger. Younger children bring a higher price on the black market, so they shaved six months off their birthdays and paid to have new birth certificates made up. I double-checked that at county records and the real records show that Jeremy will be five in two weeks and Jonah turned three in June.”

  “And the mother was part of this ruse?”

  Renzo nodded. “She told him she knew she wasn’t good for the boys, and she didn’t want them turned over to social services or foster care, and that if people were willing to pay tens of thousands of dollars for a child, they must be rich enough to give them a good life.”

  The desperation of addiction was an ugly thing and he’d seen people willing to do almost anything to secure that next hit. The temptation of all that money plus a safe place for her children had ended in drastic results. Was Marta’s death involved in this scheme? He didn’t know, but he’d make sure their detective bureau would begin an investigation right away.

  “I don’t know how to thank you, man.” He hugged Renzo. His friend had gone the distance.

  “None needed. Nothing was adding up. I sat in church yesterday morning and turned it over to God because I felt like I was missing the obvious. And as I was walking out of church, it came to me to roll the case backward. When I delved into Danny’s past, it didn’t link to any kind of family, and who doesn’t link to some kind of family these days? That sent up a red flag. And now we know. Our computer expert managed to fly under the radar and remove traces of family from typical internet searches. If nothing else, this should help Christa breathe easier because Jonah’s real father simply wants what’s best for his son but he also recognizes his frailty because this is his third time in rehab. He wants to relinquish his parental rights and name Christa as Jonah’s guardian. And he said he won’t oppose an adoption if she decides to take that route.”

  A huge weight lifted from Tug’s shoulders.

  He’d thought that tomorrow’s election was a big deal.

  It wasn’t compared to this. Whatever happened with the election results, he would still be doing the job he loved. But being able to give Christa this news meant everything. Her well-being and peace of mind ranked higher than his goals and his career. He wanted to rush right over there and tell her now, but that could set her up for another fall if this didn’t work out. He and Renzo would meet with Mark Adams tomorrow. And then he’d inform Christa and Jubilee of what they’d discovered.

  “I’ll see you in the morning.” Renzo gave him a light punch on the arm. “It’s a great way to start your big day.”

  Funny. The election had just taken second place behind Renzo’s discovery. “Tomorrow’s outcome has nothing on the news you just gave me. Knowing Christa can keep Jonah and Jeremy together isn’t just good news. It’s the best news ever. You did great, partner.”

  “Just trying to get in good with the new sheriff.” Renzo winked and moved toward his car.

  Tomorrow’s election was important, yes. He was the best man for the job. Tug believed that. But if it didn’t happen, that was all right because he loved what he did right now, too. And he meant what he’d said to his longtime partner, that the news about Jonah’s father ranked first.

  Because when it came right down to it, weren’t kids the most important thing of all?

  Chapter Seventeen

  Christa dropped the boys at Darla’s the next morning and headed to school. A much-needed good night’s sleep had refreshed her and the short drive gave her time to reflect on the evening before.

  She’d done it.

  She’d been scared at first, but the board members treated her with dignity throughout the evening. That was huge.

  But when Tug left without talking to her, she’d had to re-paste a look of calm on her face.

  She’d done well. But not well enough to appease Tug’s disappointment in her. He’d been making it a habit to greet kids as they arrived at school each morning. With staggered start times he’d go from school to school, high-fiving and shaking hands as kids streamed through the doors.

  There was no sign of him today. Was he hiding away, anxiously awaiting election results? Hoping her past didn’t ruin his goals for the future?

  She wouldn’t blame him if that were the case, but she’d come clean and now the rest was up to Golden Grove schools.

  She went through the day with her chin up, but she checked her phone twice to see if there were any polling numbers on the local stations.

  Nothing.

  She finished the day and crossed the school grounds to the central office wing of the middle school where a vote-here sign pointed to the same room she�
�d been in the night before. She went in, got her name checked off the registry and cast her ballot. And when an elections volunteer gave her an I-voted-today sticker to wear, she peeled off the paper backing and put it on her collar.

  Then she went to pick up the boys.

  Would Tug be at his parents’ house?

  Probably not, and she wasn’t sure if that was good or bad. A part of her wanted to confront him. Scold him for being closed-minded.

  Another part wanted to apologize for keeping her past a secret once they became attracted to one another. She could have opened up then, and she hadn’t. Her fault, totally.

  “I didn’t even see Copper Guy one time today.” Jeremy folded his little arms once they got back to their rental house and scowled. “You know how he picks me up and turns me upside down? And then I laugh at him and he laughs at me?”

  The image made Christa long for more of those sweet moments. “I do. And I’m sure he’ll do that again. He was busy today.”

  “Well, I’m busy every day, but I still like to see him,” Jeremy protested. “Right, Jonah?”

  “Jemmie, I miss him so much!” Always earnest, Jonah added a cute, pleading expression that tipped Christa into overdrive.

  “Guys, it’s been one day. That’s really not all that long,” she reminded them. “I promise you’ll see Tug soon.”

  Jeremy grumbled as he scowled at the bathtub. “Why do we have to take a dumb bath? Because I don’t even want to do that.”

  “Gotta be clean, kid.”

  “I’ll just get dirty again tomorrow,” he declared, but he climbed into the tub and plunked himself down. Two minutes later, he’d forgotten the drama and was having fun racing sharks and dinosaurs around his little brother when the doorbell rang.

  She eyed the boys and the stairs. She couldn’t leave them alone in the tub. But the doorbell rang again. When she didn’t answer, a text came up on her phone. Can I come in?

  Tug.

  Her pulse hiked instantly and she may have caught her breath, but then common sense took over. Giving the boys a bath, sorry.

  I’m good at bathing kids, he texted back. And I got an A in bedtime stories 101.

  He was being charming.

  She loved that about him. Truthfully, there wasn’t a thing she didn’t love about him, but could he forgive her sin of omission? More to the point, should he? And it wasn’t as if she was all too pleased with him at the moment, either. Life hadn’t exactly been a walk in the park for her, but she’d overcome, and no matter what happened, she’d give herself a firm pat on the back for that. Don’t you have election results to watch? she texted.

  In two hours. Plenty of time.

  Mixed emotions flooded her, but she typed Come in quickly because she knew seeing Tug would make the boys’ day. When the big guy strolled into the upstairs bathroom a minute later, Jeremy’s joy confirmed her decision.

  “Copper Guy!”

  “Hey, dude, I thought I’d stop around for bath time and story time. Whaddya say?” He fist-bumped each boy and the adorable little traitors grinned up at him as if their best dreams had all come true. “Anybody ready to get out?”

  “We bofe are.” Jonah stood quickly. He almost tumbled but Christa grabbed hold of his slippery arm and kept him from falling. Then she gathered him into a soft old towel. “You smell amazing,” she told him, and she nuzzled his wet little neck.

  “That tickles!” He giggled and shrieked as Jeremy scrambled out of the tub for time with his hero.

  “He’s a baby.” Jeremy indicated Jonah with a wave of his hand. “Big guys aren’t ticklish, like not even a little.”

  “No?” Tug proved him wrong by blowing raspberry kisses to his neck until he laughed out loud, just like his brother.

  “I thought I was too big for those things!” he exclaimed as Tug wrapped him into a second towel. “Do it again!”

  “One more, then pajamas.”

  “Okay!” he said, and when he was finally done giggling at Tug’s antics, he hugged Tug’s neck. “I’m so glad you came over. I was missing you so much and I was even mad.”

  “Mad at who?” asked Tug as Jeremy slipped into comfy pajama pants and a long-sleeved tee.

  “At everybody because you didn’t even come see us once today.”

  “And now I did,” Tug offered sensibly.

  “I know, so that’s good, right?” Jeremy scrambled into his arms again. “Because friends should always be together. Because they love each other and they want to, that’s why.”

  Tug lifted that heartfelt gaze to her. “Because they love each other and they want to.”

  Her head knew he was simply repeating the boy’s words, but that didn’t stop her heart from racing. She covered by heading downstairs. “You can each pick out two stories.”

  “I know ’zacly which ones I’m picking.” Jeremy had two favorites and he rarely went outside his comfort zone. Jonah was always looking for new stories, even with their somewhat thin selection. He liked things to differ. Brothers, alike in some ways, different in others. They might differ in traits, but the love they shared was sweet and sincere.

  “I’ll read first,” said Tug as he settled into a corner of the couch.

  Christa took the chair opposite.

  Jeremy had been snuggling in next to Tug, but when she sat over there, he straightened in surprise. “Aren’t you going to sit with us?”

  “I can listen just fine from here.” She patted the chair arm and smiled.

  “’Cept you can’t see the pictures,” Jeremy reminded her. “And remember how you said they made really nice pictures to go with the story so people can see the story and listen to the story.”

  “I did say that, but I know what the pictures look like because we’ve read this book dozens of times. You enjoy your time with Copper Guy. Remember how you were missing him?” No way was she about to snuggle next to Tug as if everything were all right, because it wasn’t. And yet she was grateful that he’d taken the time to come see the boys, and on a critical day for him, too. That kindness wasn’t lost on her.

  By the time the four stories were completed, Jeremy was yawning and Jonah was semi-dozing. So sweet. So very special.

  Jeremy grabbed a stuffed bear Darla had given him and walked upstairs while Tug carried Jonah. He tucked the boys in, kissed them good-night and stepped aside so Christa could do the same.

  The past few weeks she’d loved this. Two adults, sharing moments, getting to know one another and having fun with the kids. She’d never dreamed of wealth or glamour growing up.

  She’d dreamed of normal.

  This kind of normal.

  But normal carried its own kind of heartbreak and she’d have to be strong enough to handle whatever came her way. With faith, she’d do just that.

  Tug preceded her downstairs, and when he got to the bottom, he motioned to the couch. “I’ve got some good news for you. Can we talk?”

  She wanted to say yes, because she wanted the election to go well for him, but they didn’t have to share a couch to do that. “You’re leading in the polls?”

  “I promised myself not to look or listen until the results come in, so I have no idea,” he replied. Then he took a seat on the couch and motioned to a folder on the side table. “This is more important and I think it’s going to make you very happy. It’s about Jonah.”

  She moved his way and took a seat. “What about Jonah?”

  He opened the folder and slipped out three pieces of paper. There were two pictures of Danny Adams and one official-looking signed paper. “Did the judge render a decision?” she asked, puzzled.

  “The petition has been dropped,” he told her. “Because this man—” he pointed to one picture “—is Danny Adams and Danny isn’t Jonah’s father.”

  “But the testing showed that he was.” This wasn’t making se
nse. She understood the accuracy of the testing. She’d searched the internet, hoping to find a flaw, but the tests were very reliable.

  “This is Mark Adams.” Tug handed her the next picture. “Danny’s identical twin. He is Jonah’s father. When Renzo couldn’t find any family links to Danny Adams on the web, he dug deeper and discovered Mark’s existence. And when he found Mark in a rehab program in Ellensburg, he contacted him and Mark confirmed that he and Marta had a relationship nine months before Jonah was born. I went to see him this morning.”

  “That’s why you weren’t at the school.”

  He paused and gave her that crooked smile. The one that set her heart to racing. “You missed me?” he asked.

  “I noticed,” she corrected him. “What did Mark Adams say? Why would his brother claim paternity for a nephew? Was he trying to save Jonah for his brother?” He’d said this was good news, but how could finding another relative, the boy’s true father, make things better? She was pretty sure that only made things twice as bad, but then Tug reached out.

  Took her hand.

  And something about the look on his strong, kind face made her almost think everything could be all right, after all.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Tug firmed his jaw and shook his head. “Nothing that gallant. It seems that he’d been helping Marta set up a paid adoption of the boys and Jonah’s was scheduled to go through at the same time Marta disappeared and the boys went off the grid.”

  Christa’s gaze sharpened. “You can’t be serious. She was selling her children?”

  There was no way to soft-peddle this kind of truth. “She knew she wasn’t good for them and she wanted to reestablish her life. Danny had new birth certificates made for the boys, shaving six months off their birthdays. Jonah’s new parents were supposed to pick him up in September, and when the boy wasn’t delivered, they were upset. Danny explained that with the mother deceased, he needed to establish paternity to complete the transaction.”

  “I can’t believe this.” Christa put her face in her hands, trying to make sense of what she was hearing. “What kind of person does something like this? Who tries to sell their own flesh and blood?”