by Jen Davis
“You look great, Rob.” Matt gave him a shy smile before tilting his head toward the woman at the counter. “Let me introduce you to Jimmy’s mom.”
Patty’s eyes narrowed as she caught sight of him. Men—and women too, he supposed—had taken his measure many times in his life, but he’d never felt the weight of their assessment the way he did hers. Her gaze catalogued every inch of him, from his barely styled hair, to his blue V-neck shirt, all the way down to his navy jeans and brown knock-off Helm boots.
His initial assessment of her from Closing Time held up fairly well on closer inspection. A red cloth headband held back her short brown hair. It brought out the rich color of her dark skin and matched the shade of her lipstick. She wore a black Alicia Keyes T-shirt and sported at least six green and red fabric bracelets with various designs on her right wrist.
Suppressing the urge to blind her with one of his sunshine smiles, he kept his face neutral as he approached.
Matt broke the ice. “Patty, this is Robby. Rob, Patty.”
He wasn’t sure she would accept his hand, but he offered it anyway. Her grip was cool and firm. It warmed him she accepted the peace offering, but he wouldn’t fool himself; a handshake was a far cry from a sign of approval.
“It’s really great to meet you. Matt says you were the best friend he had growing up.”
She gave nothing away with her silent shrug.
“I respect you wanting to get to know me before accepting me in your son’s life. I want you to know I take it very seriously. I grew up in a family and an environment where children were cherished and lifted up by the community.” As long as they didn’t make the mistake of ending up gay. “I’ve spent a lot of time around kids, and I love them. I’m sure I’ll love your son too.”
Patty’s face softened a little. “Did you grow up around here?”
“No. A small town, not too far away.”
“So, you’re still pretty close with your family.”
Why had he brought up his family? Stupid. “I was. Until they found out I was gay. They…couldn’t reconcile who I am with who they thought I should be. I’ve been on my own ever since.”
She leaned forward, resting her elbows on the counter. “Your family sucks. My mom’s always been there for me, no matter how much I’ve fucked up.”
Matt bumped her shoulder gently with his own. “When you love somebody, you don’t stop loving them just because they disappoint you.”
They shared a meaningful look.
A beat later, her gaze shot back to Robby. “What’s the deal with you and Matty?”
“Pat—” Matt tried to interrupt her, but she shooed him away.
“Because he’s right. I didn’t just stop loving him because he didn’t love me back the way I wanted him to. And maybe I don’t have any right to nose into what’s happening between you, but I’m asking anyway.”
“The deal is…we’re together. We fit.” He chanced a look at Matt, and the smile he found fortified him to continue. “I love him. Not as long as you have, but it doesn’t have to be a competition. I’m not trying to replace you in his heart. There’s room for both of us there.”
“What kind of man are you?”
“I’m loyal. Faithful.” He swallowed. “I work hard. I believe in God. I’m grateful every day for the friends who have become my family. And want to spend every day loving Matt…and hopefully, one day, your son too.”
“He already has two parents who love him.” She stood straight, folding her arms and lifting her chin in challenge.
“I don’t think anyone can have too many people who love them.”
Patty released her arms, but her chin didn’t drop at all. “I’ll think about it.”
“I appreciate it. I’m sure this is weird for you. It probably sucks. So, thank you. For meeting me and for hearing me out.” Robby didn’t offer his hand again. Instead, he ducked his head and turned toward the door.
Matt rested a hand gently on his back and followed him out to the car. “You said you love me.”
“You said it first.” He leaned against the car, with a smile part flirt and part tease.
“I did, huh?” Matt put both hands flat against the roof, caging Robby’s body between them. “Remind me when this happened.”
“At the restaurant. You said this was the first time you’ve ever been in love with someone. Did you think I missed it?” To the contrary, it had rattled around in his head in a near-constant loop ever since.
Matt sucked on his bottom lip. “It’s not like you said anything, and I was acting pretty needy, so…”
Advancing a fraction of an inch, he poked a finger at Matt’s chest. “Stop right there. One.” He held up a finger. “You were not acting needy. You had questions, and they deserved answers.”
A second finger joined the first. “Two. I didn’t say anything because—” He sighed. “I didn’t trust myself to handle it the right way. No one has ever said they loved me before, and it’s like I just froze up for a minute. Then, I didn’t say it back because what if you thought I was just saying it to say it?”
Stupid as the words sounded to his own ears, he could only imagine how dumb they seemed to Matt. Inadequate.
“And even after all my overthinking, I still didn’t do it justice.” He cupped the other man’s face in his hands, feathering his thumbs over the clean-shaven skin. “I love you, Matt York. Not just the best parts of you. Not just the idea of you. You.”
Matt dropped his hands from the car to grip Robby’s hips at the first brush of their mouths.
The intimacy threatened to drown him. Still, he pressed for more, his tongue licking at Matt’s lips, a plea for entry. When the kiss finally deepened, he felt it all the way down to his toes.
Matt pulled away first. “I love you too. God help me, I don’t know what it is you see in me or how I got so lucky, but I’m not going to question it. I’m holding on, you hear me? I’m holding on and I won’t let go.”
Every dream Robby had ever had was coming true. A family. Friends. A calling.
And love.
“Matty.” The light from inside the shop framed Patty as she stood in the doorway. “We need to talk.”
“Coming.” Matt stole one last chaste kiss, then stepped back. “I’ll meet you back at your place in a bit?”
Robby rubbed at the warmth in his chest. “I can’t think of a better way to spend the night.”
In fact, this might just be the best night of his life.
***
Matt
It took every drop of his self-control to walk away from Robby when all Matt really wanted to do was get to the apartment and get skin to skin with the man he loved.
Love.
A little shimmy crept into his walk as he replayed Robby’s confession outside of the car. It seemed inconceivable for him to be the first person to ever tell Robby he loved him. The guy couldn’t have been closer to perfect. Not only was he gorgeous, he was kind and smart and…good.
Maybe all of his paranoia about Robby’s mysterious past was just that—paranoia. Robby dedicated himself to other people and carried his faith close to his heart. Not to mention the amazing things he could do with his body.
Matt’s pulse picked up. Who knew what amazing things Robby would show him tonight? Maybe he’d finally get a glimpse of the rock-hard body his lover kept hidden under all of those clothes.
Oh yeah, he needed to wrap things up with Patty as quickly as possible. Maybe pick up another bouquet of flowers on the way to Robby’s place. He didn’t know whatever happened to the first cluster of daisies, but they’d meant something to Robby, and nothing else mattered.
When he got back inside the shop, Patty stood with Steve and a slender blond man he didn’t recognize. Something about the guy made the hair stand up on the back of his neck.
“Are you sure he’s the same person?” Patty wore the intense, pinched expression she usually saved for a visit from her ultra-conservative Aunt Karen.
&
nbsp; “I’m sure,” the blond guy responded. “I’ve known Robby for years. Could describe every nook and cranny of him, if you need me to.”
He did not like the direction this was going. “Excuse me, but who are you?”
Steve looped an arm around the man’s waist. “This is my new boyfriend, Parker.”
The blond pressed a kiss against Steve’s cheek. “I was in the back when you brought Robby in. I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard my buddy out here.”
“Why didn’t you come out and say hello, then?” Something felt off. Maybe it was the way Parker didn’t look him straight in the eye or the conspiratorial tone in his voice.
“Seemed like a private conversation.”
“But not too private for you to eavesdrop.”
Parker’s features tightened. “You want the skinny on your boy or not?”
“From you? No.”
Patty waved her hand. “Excuse me, but I do.”
The smaller man smirked. “Robby Jordan is the dirtiest, sloppy bottom I’ve ever met in my life. The dude can suck cocaine back like a Hoover, and he whored himself without shame for years.”
“You’re lying.” Matt didn’t even have to think about it. This guy had sleazebag written all over him, from his skin-tight jeggings to the pink harness he wore over his white T-shirt.
Parker stuck out his bottom lip. “It would be easier for you if I was, I’m sure. But if I didn’t know Robby, how could I describe the little birthmark he has an inch away from his dick? How he doesn’t make a sound when he comes?”
He had no idea whether the birthmark was a real thing or not, but he’d never admit it to this asshole. “Are you trying to insinuate you’ve had sex with my boyfriend?”
“Not at all.” Parker stepped out of Steve’s embrace and glided toward Matt. “But I’ve seen him get fucked a million ways from Sunday.” He dropped his voice like he was sharing a secret. “At the parties, you know. And, of course, in the home movies.”
Patty advanced. “You said something about drugs? Matt? You know what drugs did to Shawn.”
Parker fanned his face with his hand. “Oh yeah. I can’t tell you everything he did, because I wasn’t there for all of it, but he did mountains of coke when he lived with John. I mean, really, he’d put anything up his nose.”
John. The ex who showed up at the work site.
Still, Matt refused to let doubt trickle into his heart.
Parker shot him a knowing look. “Ah, you’ve heard of John. Amazing in bed, you know, though he didn’t do all the freaky shit Robby did with other guys.” He fluttered his lashes at Steve. “Couldn’t hold a candle to you, though, sweetheart. Still, our Lambchop broke his heart when he left him in the middle of the night. How could you abandon someone after so long together?” Sighing for maximum effect, he lifted his shoulder. “He found some greener pastures, I guess. Though the little apartment he has now leaves something to be desired.”
Matt hardened his heart against the picture Parker painted. “Even if all of what you say is true, and I’m not saying I believe it is, you’re talking about ancient history. Robby broke up with John years ago.” And he refused to believe this douche had seen the inside of Robby’s apartment.
“True.” Parker blinked. “But I saw them together at Nitro not so long ago, and they looked awfully cozy.”
“John wants to get him back. And?”
“He had his hand in Robby’s pants, sugar. Plus, Robby came back again just a few Saturdays back. We did shots in the party room. He got so drunk, I’m still stunned he could walk out of there.”
The day he showed up at Closing Time. Dread pooled in his stomach at the pinched look on Patty’s face.
“The party room? At Nitro?” Steve thundered. “You hang out there? I am not okay with that, Parker. The cops need to shut the place down.”
Wait. He’d been in Nitro, himself, a few weeks ago. Nothing there stood out as anything immoral or illegal. “I don’t understand.”
“Sex. Drugs. Underage boys.” Steve gritted his teeth. “It’s disgusting.”
“I didn’t see anything of the sort, and I’ve been there in the past month.”
Parker soothed Steve, petting his arm. “I didn’t stay, darling. And you didn’t see it, because you didn’t go to the VIP room. Older men, young boys. If you don’t believe me, I’ll take you there myself. See it with your own eyes, and then ask your precious Robby if he was there. Decide what you can live with once you’ve got all the facts.”
“Fine. Let’s go.” He’d show Patty the place wasn’t so bad. Surely, she wouldn’t find fault with Robby just dancing and hanging out with some friends.
“No can do.” Parker tsked. “Back room is only open on Saturdays. I’ll take you there tomorrow, though. Meet me at five, and I’ll help you take your blinders off.”
“Whatever,” he growled.
Patty grabbed his arm as he turned away. “If even half of this shit is true, you know this freak is going nowhere near my son. And if you’re with him, neither are you. I get that you care about Robby, but don’t even try to come back to me making excuses if what Parker says pans out.”
“I don’t know what he’s talking about, Pat, but I’m going to prove to you, Robby is a good man. And Parker is nothing but a liar.”
His phone buzzed.
Robby: A friend of mine has an emergency. I need to help out. Rain check on 2nite?
Locking his jaw, he considered a dozen different responses. But this was not a conversation they could broach over text.
Matt: Can we get together afterward? I really need to see you.
Robby: I’ve got to get to the hospital. Tomorrow?
Matt: Fine.
Hopefully by then, he’d have put all of Patty’s worries to rest. And he’d be one step closer to the family he’d always wanted.
Chapter
TWENTY-FIVE
Robby
Robby woke up close to noon on the sofa at the Q-Center, his heart still aching over what had happened to Sara the night before. At least now, she was safe and sleeping soundly in her own bed.
He thought about calling Matt but decided against distracting him during a shift at the bar. Besides, he needed to fill in Paul on what had happened.
Willing his tight muscles to move from the couch, he stood and spotted the reverend and his husband peering at a laptop on the wooden table.
“Hey, guys. Why didn’t you wake me?” Robby slid into the chair beside Chris.
“Figured you must’ve had a late night if you crashed here.” Chris turned the computer at an angle so he could better see. “Look. The website is up and running.”
The homepage had a clean look with THE Q-CENTER centered in white text at the top over a navy-blue header. What looked like two hand-drawn LGBT rainbow flags flanked the words on either side. Drop down menus offered an About Us page, Directions, Services, Donations, and Testimonials.
His finger hovered over the mouse pad for a second or two before he took the plunge and clicked on the Testimonial tab. The first video box featured a still image of Sara, and as he scrolled down, box after box showed a thumbnail of one of the kids who looked to this place for help. Marshall, Vin, Meggie.
From there, he clicked on the services tab and found pictures of the new addition, the bathroom, an inside look at Sara’s room. The new bedrooms didn’t have beds in them yet, but he’d bet his last dollar the private floor space would beat the shelter experience for some folks any day.
“If you want to watch the video-clip I took of you, it’s part of the About Us section.” Chris pointed to the screen. “I know you were nervous about it, but it’s really good.”
His stomach protested just thinking about it. “Pass. Thanks, though. I’m sure you did a great job; everything about the site looks amazing.”
Chris puffed out his chest at the praise.
He pushed the computer away, dreading what he needed to say next. “Did anyone tell you what happened last night
?”
The reverend shook his head. “Does this have anything to do with why you spent the night here?”
“Someone hurt Sara. A guy she met at a bar. He, uh, didn’t realize she was trans.” Robby rubbed at the hard knot in his shoulder. “She’s pretty banged up. Her arm’s fractured. She called me from the hospital last night.”
Paul sank into his chair. “What kind of world are we living in?”
It hurt to see the bleak expression on his face. “I thought maybe we could do some outreach today,” Paul continued. “Send some of the kids to the parks and libraries, hand out some cards.”
Chris responded. “We’d asked Sara to help us out with intake for the new wing, kind of serve as a den mother for any new young people looking to bunk down for a while. I think we’ll need to find some temporary help while she recovers.”
“Probably a good idea. In the meantime, I’d like to help with the outreach today too. I could check out a few places I used to haunt. Spread the word.” Staying busy would help keep his mind off what had happened to his friend last night.
Paul slid a few cards his way. “You’re doing God’s work, son. I know He brought you to us for a reason.”
The words turned over in his head as he left the building. Awful as his early years in Atlanta had been, maybe something good could come out of them.
He hit the a few of the tent cities beneath the interstate on-ramps. In the middle of the day, there weren’t too many people around, but he’d learned early, if you had to sleep on the street, it was far safer when the sun was out.
In three stops, he only gave out one card. The slight man was probably younger than eighteen, but if he had any sense, he’d lie to anyone who asked. The guy had firmed his jaw and planted his feet at Robby’s advance, but he took the card. Only time would tell if the kid had enough trust or desperation to seek out the center at nightfall.