by Jen Davis
Before he could break the tension with some awkward backtracking, Robby spoke. “I like that. Being a bunch of firsts for you. I’m not sure I have many firsts left for me. I’ve, uh.” He let out a breath. “I’ve done a lot…of stuff. But it’s never felt like it did with you. Not with anyone else.”
“Good.” Not as good as an I love you too, but Matt would take it.
“I want to meet your son.”
“Jimmy?” Matt probably should’ve thought about it before. If this was going to be the kind of relationship he thought it would, he couldn’t keep one part of his life separate from the other.
“Yeah. I know he’s the most important thing in your life. I respect the fact you’re a package deal, and I want to get to know him.” Robby shrank back a little. “Unless you don’t want me to.”
“No. I do. I have to talk to Patty, though.” Matt tilted his head back and stared at the ceiling. “Our conversation should be interesting.” Who knew how she would react? Would it make her ditch the offer to talk about custody? God, he hoped not.
“Okay.”
Matt released Robby’s hand long enough to put two twenties on the table. “C’mon. I’ll walk you to your car. Since I didn’t give you a special hello, I need to make sure you get a special goodbye.”
Chapter
TWENTY-THREE
Matt
As much as Matt looked forward to giving Robby an exceptional greeting the next morning, he settled for a soft smile. Like he’d said before, public displays weren’t high on his to-do list. Besides, he and Robby had dinner plans at Brick’s Thursday night. Well, Robby had plans. Hopefully, no one would mind him crashing the party.
Tuesday night, he went to his computer class, then went home and finished his final project. He’d need to decide soon if he could spare the money for a summer session.
But it was a question for another day. Tonight, while Robby went to the Q-Center, he’d tackle a different problem: Patty.
He’d hoped to talk at her apartment, but when he called, she told him she was working. So, he’d kill two birds with one stone, checking out the tattoo parlor she loved so much and break it to her about Robby at the same time. No telling if she’d be livid or heartbroken or maybe even a little happy for him. Only one way to find out.
Fantasy Ink took up one space in a glass-fronted strip mall, not too far from Closing Time. A neon sign sporting the name of the place hung next to the door, surrounded by colorful hand-drawn dragons, eagles, and snakes, amid a lush, verdant landscape, and a jewel blue painted sky.
The door brushed over an old-fashioned bell, which tinkled as he walked in. Not one person looked his way. A young white couple sat with their heads together, flipping through a book of designs. A Hispanic man with muscular arms, sleeved in tattoos, fiddled with a needle gun over the shoulder of a slender woman with skin the color of milky tea. Patty took notes on a small pad, a cordless phone crammed between her ear and her shoulder.
He walked through the modest, open lobby type area, needing less than a dozen steps to reach the small desk and computer area where Patty stood.
“Yes. I’ve got all your information. Like I said, Steve is pretty booked up, and the kind of work you’re looking for is going to take a while. He’s going to have to call you back to set something up.” She set the notepad next to the computer. “Yes, sir. Y—yes. Okay. Bye.”
Hanging up the phone on the wall mount, she groused under her breath before she looked up and caught Matt’s eye. “Never expected to see you here. You must really want to talk.”
She motioned him to follow her toward the tattoo area, where only one of three stations had a customer. “Steve, I need to take five.”
Her boss grunted and kept working.
Patty motioned for him to sit on the one of the chairs, and she pulled up a stool in front of him. “So, where’s the fire? Is this about Jimmy?”
Straight to the point as always. Patty looked good tonight, her hair pulled back in a tight bun and just a hint of make-up coloring her cheeks. She also looked impatient, keeping only one eye on him as she checked her phone and swiped her thumb over the screen.
“Sort of.” He took a deep breath. “I’m seeing someone.”
She dropped the phone, and it bounced once on the emerald green tile. Thank goodness she had a case on it, or it would’ve been a goner. “Seeing? As in, dating?”
He couldn’t read her voice. “Yes. I am dating someone. A guy I work with. It’s serious.”
Patty retrieved her phone from the floor, then turned it over slowly in her hands. “What does this have to do with me?” Her voice was guarded…and cold.
“You’re always going to be part of my life. Even if we can’t make it being friends again, we’ll always be Jimmy’s parents.” He wiped his sweaty palms together. “Robby is going to be a part of my life too. I want him to meet my son.”
“Our son,” she snapped.
No. This could not go downhill, not so quickly. “Of course, our son. It’s why I’m here. I want your blessing to introduce them.”
Her left thumb tapped against her leg as she blinked her eyes rapidly. “What’s so special about this guy? Robby.” She seemed to catch her nervous hand movement and gripped her leg instead. “I’ve known you, what, eight years? You never so much as looked at anyone. But with this guy, it’s serious? What does the word even mean for you?”
“It means I’d like to keep him around long-term.” The red vinyl chair creaked as he tried to get more comfortable. Though to be fair, his discomfort had little to do with the furniture. “As for what’s special about him?” He shrugged. “Everything.”
She produced a fingernail file, seemingly out of nowhere, and suddenly grew very focused on shaping her stubby nails. “He’s in construction? A roughneck, then. You know, they say the musclebound guys all have little dicks, but maybe you don’t want to pack too much meat up your ass.”
With her overloud declaration, every person in the room swiveled their heads to stare in their direction. Everyone, including Patty’s boss, who growled low in his throat. “You want to take it outside, guys?”
“Sorry, Steve. We’ll keep it down.” Patty clenched the file tightly in her hand before stuffing it into her back pocket. “I shouldn’t have said that. It was a knee-jerk reaction.”
Matt leaned toward her. “He’s not part of the crew. He’s the foreman’s assistant. I get this is hard for you, but you don’t need to take it out on him. He’s a really nice guy. Tries to help other people. Volunteers. The kind of guy I hope you can find. Someone I’d be proud to introduce to our son.”
She folded her arms across her chest. “He doesn’t meet Jimmy until he meets me first.”
For Pete’s sake. Who knew what she would pull if she met Robby face-to-face?
“I’m his mama. As much as you’d like it to be otherwise. You want Jimmy around your boyfriend—you want to keep this whole custody thing out of court—you’ll do what I ask.”
Steve approached them, his customer presumably gone. “This the famous Matt I’ve heard so much about?”
“In the flesh.” He stuck out his hand, fully prepared for a brush off, but Steve took it in a firm grip and shook.
“My mom spoke highly of you. You and Patty both were always nice to her. It was a time in my life I’m not very proud of, so I appreciate you guys were around when I wasn’t very much.” Steve shot a reproachful look at Patty. “You need to stop giving him shit about the guy he’s dating.”
Patty huffed. “I have a right to know the people he is bringing around our child.”
“Is it about his partner being a stranger or about it being another man? Because you know I don’t tolerate bigoted bullshit in my shop, no matter what kind of history you have with my mother.”
“You know I don’t have a problem with you being gay, Steve.”
Matt laughed darkly. “You just have a problem with me being gay. Hell, woman, you’ve said it yourself for long enough. O
r were you just trying to get under my skin?”
“It’s hard, okay? To think about you with anyone. I said I’d meet him, though, and I won’t be an asshole. All right?”
“All right.” He climbed out of the chair and headed for the door. The couple returned their attention to the design book so quickly, he almost missed their shameless eavesdropping on the conversation. Almost.
“Hey, Matty.”
He turned and looked over his shoulder.
“I want you to be happy.”
Despite the way she lashed out at first, he let himself believe her. Even a gamer-geek, single dad with two jobs and a terrible track record with love deserved a shot at a happy ending. Right?
***
Robby
Robby squeezed Matt’s hand, hoping to calm the nervous clenching and unclenching of his fingers as they stood on Brick’s front porch, waiting for someone to answer the bell. “Take a deep breath, hon. We’re not entering enemy territory. These are our friends.”
“They’re your friends,” Matt murmured. “They barely even know me.”
True, but Robby hoped to change that, starting tonight.
Liv opened the door before he could continue his pep talk. She flashed a welcoming smile, then lifted her brow at their entwined hands. “I didn’t know you’d be joining us, Matt, but I’m glad you’re here. Please come in. We have plenty of burgers.”
Matt returned his squeeze, then let go to follow her into the house.
Brick came into the kitchen from the back door on the other side of the room, a plate full of steaming burgers on a big plate. Kane stood over the counter, salting a platter of French fries. Amanda laid out a tray filled with lettuce, tomato, and onion.
“I hope it’s okay I brought a date.”
Everyone froze in place, except to whip their heads in his direction in a move so synchronized, it looked rehearsed.
Kane snapped out of it first, chuckling as he positioned the fries next to the hamburger fixings. “You may want to watch how you phrase things, brother. You’re gonna give people the wrong idea.”
“Or the right one,” Matt murmured.
And they froze again.
Robby snapped his fingers in the air, three times in quick succession. “Guys. Hey. Wake up. I’m trying to tell you I’ve got a boyfriend. The customary thing to do would be to congratulate me.”
“Holy fucking shit!” Kane whooped.
“Not exactly what I was going for, but I’ll take it.” Robby laughed as Kane gripped his right shoulder and shook it.
“I’ll be damned,” Brick murmured. “Congratulations. To both of you.”
Liv pulled an extra plate from the cabinet and quickly added a place setting to the sixth seat at the table. “I, for one, think it’s long overdue. I saw the way you both looked at each other the night we went to Moe’s.” She glanced at the three incredulous faces around her. “What? Are you guys blind? Matt was looking at Robby like he was a prime rib.”
Matt made a choking sound, and the rest of the table relaxed into laughter as they filled their plates.
“How are you feeling, Amanda?” Matt changed the subject. “You’re in your, what, fifth month now?”
“Almost, yeah. I’m doing great, actually. I’ve finally got some energy again.”
Matt smeared some mayo on his bun. “For sure. I remember, in Patty’s first trimester, she said it felt like Jimmy was sucking all the life out of her like a high-powered hose. Plus, she had terrible morning sickness. I think around her twentieth week, she got her second wind.”
Though Matt seemed oblivious, Robby noticed the awkward silence following the reminder Matt had a Baby Mama somewhere out there in the world. Kane opened his mouth and closed it, then did it again, his better angels apparently stopping him from whatever he wanted to say.
“Go ahead and ask.” Better to get it all out on the table.
Matt looked up from assembling his hamburger, eyebrows furrowed.
But Kane knew exactly what he meant. “What’s the deal with her? You said Patty’s her name? I’ve got to say, this seems like a change of pace for you, going from the whole nuclear family thing to getting freaky-deaky with Robby here.”
Kane’s wince and flinch away from his wife made it clear something happened under the table. “Or not, dude. It’s cool.”
Amanda cleared her throat. “Forgive my husband. You don’t have to respond to his interrogation.”
“Actually,” Brick put both his hands down flat on either side of his plate, “I’d like it if you would.” He scooted his chair back and stood, his big frame towering over everyone. “Kane’s manners may be for shit, but he’s not wrong, and maybe it makes me an asshole too. So be it. Robby is family, and we look out for our own.”
Aw crap. What was Robby supposed to do with that?
The only way to meet it was head-on. He held out a hand, holding off Matt’s reply, then stood to face his best friend. “I don’t need you to look out for me. Not this time.”
Brick opened his mouth, but this was too important to let him interrupt.
Robby hardened his voice. “I love you. We’re family, and it means everything you want to slay dragons for me. But I don’t need protection from this. Even if you don’t trust Matt, you have to trust me and accept my choice. Respect me enough to show him some respect.”
His friend silently returned to his seat.
“Damn, Robby.” Kane whistled. “When did you grow such a big set of balls, brother?”
“If you want a look at my balls, brother, all you have to do is ask.” He cocked his head and lifted his chin in challenge.
It was Amanda of all people who broke the tension with a bark of laughter, and her mirth spread like wildfire. In a matter of seconds, everyone at the table was laughing.
Everyone but Matt. When Kane coughed out his last chortle, he spoke up. “I get it. You guys don’t know me very well. To be real, sometimes, I’m not sure I know myself. I do know I’m not looking to hurt Robby. I’m in this one hundred percent.”
Matt looked at Kane, then Brick. “I’m not with Jimmy’s mom. I never have been. We were friends who gave it a one-time shot at something more. It didn’t work out, but it gave me my son, so I am never going to regret it. Patty may always be in my life, but she isn’t my future. Robby is.” He sat up ramrod straight. “I’d love your blessing, but we’re going to be together whether you give it or not.”
Both big men gaped, but Brick recovered first. “Does he make you happy, Robby?”
Happy? His heart could burst right now after Matt’s little speech. “Yeah. He does.” And he planned to keep him as long as he possibly could.
“Good enough for me. Now somebody better start eating these hamburgers before they get cold. No way I’m letting all this fucking meat go to waste.”
Kane waited until Robby took a bite and started chewing before he leaned forward. “Just for the record, I don’t want to see your balls, bro. I’m sure they’re nice and all, but my own nuts are more than enough to behold every day.”
His wife nudged him with her shoulder. “You just keep telling yourself that, baby.”
And this time when the laughter started, everyone joined in.
Chapter
TWENTY-FOUR
Robby
Tonight would be the night.
Robby ran his hand over the stubble on his jaw and nodded resolutely at his reflection in the mirror. It was time to drop the last of his walls. One by one, he’d shed the layers he’d built to insulate himself from the outside world.
He’d cut the long bangs and ditched the thrift store Oxfords that made him look like a teenager taking his grandma out to lunch.
He’d stopped smiling when he didn’t mean it. Stopped agreeing with everything. Stopped hoping for people to fight his battles.
And with every new side he exposed of himself, he’d given the people he loved an opportunity to turn away, to reject him. Only, they hadn’t.
B
rick had said he liked the haircut and clothes right away. He’d said confidence looked good on him.
Kane had laughed when he stood up for himself and made a crack about his balls.
And when he’d lost his mind a little with the cameras at the Q-Center, no one batted an eye over the fact he couldn’t bring himself to smile. If anything, being real had brought them all closer.
Now all he had left to reveal were the dark, oily secrets writhing beneath his skin…and the scars they’d left behind. He couldn’t hide them forever. It had been a miracle he’d managed this long.
Besides, their acceptance pumped like a drug through his veins. The more he got, the more he craved. With every smile, every hug, every touch, he got a little closer to flying. God wouldn’t bring him this far only to get rejected in the end.
No. This time someone would see him—all of him—and want him anyway.
He dipped his hand in the running water from the faucet and ran it through his hair, making it stand up in short spikes. With one last satisfied look in the mirror, he left to join Matt at the tattoo parlor.
Finally, he would meet the infamous Patty, which he both dreaded and looked forward to in equal measure. On one hand, she’d been the best friend Matt had ever had. She was a window into his history, and Robby hungered for every new piece of the man available to discover.
At the same time, though, she might hate him on principle. She’d wanted the kind of relationship with Matt he had. Could she be happy for them? If she wanted to, she could keep him away from her son, which could draw a wedge between him and Matt in a way he might never overcome.
He shut down the bubbling anxiety as he parked the car in front of the shop. Either she’d like him, or she wouldn’t.
Though a short prayer never hurt anyone.
A quick petition to the Almighty later, he threw back his shoulders and strode inside. Matt waited in the seat immediately to the left of the door and popped to his feet when the bell sounded overhead.