Lovewrecked

by Halle, Karina

  Tai grunts, avoids my eyes.

  “Babe?” I repeat.

  “Don’t think I haven’t been asking about you,” Cam goes on, clearly drunk. “I said, oy, mate, who is the American ranga? Introduce me to her. And you know what? This fucker wouldn’t do it.”

  “What’s a ranga?”

  “It means redhead here,” Tai says warily. “Though I prefer Gingersnap.”

  “And so the real question on all our minds,” Cam says, leering at me, “is…”

  Oh boy.

  Here it comes.

  “…does the carpet match the drapes?”

  I roll my eyes just as Tai winds up and smacks Cam across the back of his head, so hard that Cam’s drink flies out of his hands, narrowly missing me.

  “Get some fucking manners, you cockweasel,” Tai roars at him.

  “For fuck’s sake, Tai,” Cam says, holding the back of his head. “I’m not a punching bag.”

  “You are when you start talking like a prick. Now fuck off and think about what you’ve done.”

  Cam stares at him, bewildered, as Tai makes the motion for Cam to run along.

  To my surprise, Cam does so, with his tail between his legs.

  Then Tai makes a huffing sound and starts marching off toward the beach.

  As usual, I run after him.

  “You didn’t have to hit him so hard,” I tell him. “I can handle myself. I’m used to it.”

  “I didn’t hit him that hard,” he says, glancing at me quickly. “Believe me, I was holding back. And that’s pretty fucking sad that you’re used to that.”

  “It’s just a stupid question,” I tell him. I’m playing it off like it’s no big deal, when actually the question always made my skin crawl. It’s pretty disgusting, if I’m being honest with myself.

  And if I’m being honest with myself, there was something very thrilling in a primal way to see Tai react like that. It was like he was in full-on protective caveman mode, and I didn’t mind one bit.

  Tai growls in disapproval. “Well then, perhaps I should have introduced the two of you when he asked.”

  Hmmm. I see. Back to acting like he doesn’t give a shit. Or maybe the protective part was the acting.

  “No, thank you,” I tell him.

  “How are you holding up, anyway?”

  “How am I holding up? Why? I’m fine.”

  He shrugs but there’s more to it.

  “There you are,” Mara says as she walks over to us. “I thought maybe I would take a couple of pics of the two of you together before we do the entire wedding party. You’re such an attractive couple.”

  Both Tai and I laugh in unison.

  Awkward.

  She gets us to stand where we are and link our arms together, posing with the reception in the background, our drinks raised. We do a few of these types of photos before she calls over the bride and groom and the rest of the wedding party.

  Tai and I unlink arms and I turn to him. We’re still in such close proximity that I’m practically right up against him and he’s not moving back. He’s built like a cedar, roots in deep.

  I glance up at him, brushing a loose strand of hair out of my face. “What did you mean, how am I holding up?”

  A dark brow raises. “Does it matter? You said you were fine.” His voice is low, in a murmur, and we’re so close I can smell his breath. Whisky and mint.

  “And why wouldn’t I be fine?”

  “You’re awfully defensive, Gingersnap,” he says, eyeing me for a moment before looking away.

  “Don’t call me that. And I’m not defensive.”

  His lips twitch. “I just know you’ve been having a go lately, with your ex-boyfriend and all. Thought maybe you weren’t handling the wedding very well. The celebration of love, everyone coupled up, etcetera, etcetera.”

  Don’t act defensive, don’t act defensive.

  I have to repeat this in my head because the first thing I want to do is lash out.

  I paste a smile on my face and look at him calmly. “Who said I don’t love being single? After all, I’m the one who broke up with him. And you’re single too, aren’t you? How come weddings are only supposed to be hell for single girls and not for single guys?”

  Something dark comes over his gaze, and for a moment there I’m afraid that he actually isn’t single. I mean, he could totally have a girlfriend…one that’s away and couldn’t be here.

  “You have a fair point,” he says after a moment.

  Then he walks off toward Richard and Lacey.

  Meanwhile, I try to brush off what he said, but I can’t.

  I need a drink.

  * * *

  For the second time in a handful of days, I’ve woken up massively hungover.

  Thankfully, it’s not as bad as the other time.

  Least I don’t think.

  Let’s see.

  I slowly sit up in bed—Tai’s bed—and try to assess the damage.

  My head aches.

  My mouth tastes sour.

  There’s a mysterious bruise on my arm.

  I’m wearing my nightshirt backwards.

  The light coming in through the windows tells me I’ve slept in, which I must have needed.

  I close my eyes, and try to remember the last thing that happened. I don’t even think I remember going to bed.

  Oh.

  Oh wait.

  There’s a fragment of a memory, grainy, like an old photograph.

  Someone carried me up the stairs.

  And gently placed me in bed.

  I remember the gentle part the most, just the feeling of it, because it reminded me of my father when he’d pick me up from when I fell asleep in the car and take me to my bedroom. I was always in a half-awake, half-asleep state. Comforted and cradled.

  Ugh. Did my dad have to do that last night because I was so drunk?

  I can feel my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. Shit. So much for trying to make my dad proud of me. Hi, I’m Daisy, I’m twenty-eight years old and my dad has to put me to bed.

  I exhale slowly and pick up my phone from the bedside table. It’s noon and there’s a text from Laura, one of my friends back home, wondering how the wedding was. But other than that, no one has asked if I’m okay or has tried to wake me up, which makes me feel even more uneasy.

  How much of a wreck was I?

  I open my phone and go straight to the photos because I’m the type of girl who brings her phone out when she’s drunk and tries to take selfies with everyone.

  And there I am, in drunken Daisy mode, just as I thought.

  I’m in a selfie with Lacey, whose one eye is half-closed, a sign that she’s drunk too. We look happy though, which is nice. Like real sisters should.

  Then I’m posing with Richard, who has somehow slicked his hair off his forehead and is wrinkling his brow like a wannabe De Niro. It’s creepy.

  I’m also in a photo with my parents, with Eaton, with Jana, with Eaton and Jana together, all of us drinking wine at once, then I’m with Tai’s parents, then I’m with some of Tai’s friends, then I’m with someone’s grandmother doing a funky dance, then I’m back with Richard and Lacey yelling happily about something. I’m getting progressively drunker and sloppier in each photo, but then again, so is everyone else.

  Then I come across a photo I hoped I wouldn’t see.

  A photo of Tai.

  I’ve taken a picture of him from the side. He’s got a drink in hand, the bow tie on his tux has been loosened and the collar unbuttoned, showing a nice slice of dark skin. He’s laughing at something someone has said off-camera and his expression takes my breath away. There’s something so loose and freeing and…happy about him here. For a moment I wonder what it would be like to be the one that makes him laugh like that.

  I pause on that picture for a long time, studying it.

  Then I flip to the next one.

  In this picture Tai is looking at me and, naturally, his expression has totally changed. He’s f
rowning, lips pressed together as if he must not ever smile. The Great Extreme Grump. Guess I really must do that to him.

  I sigh and scroll to the next one on the roll.

  It’s a blurry selfie of the two of us.

  My arm is around his neck, holding him down to my height.

  He’s looking deep into the camera, frowning to the extreme.

  My mouth is open, smiling, all teeth, loving this.

  The next photo my arm around his neck is even tighter and I’m pressing my thumb between his brow as if to stop him from frowning. In this photo, his eyes are dancing and it looks like he’s trying not to smile.

  Then there’s the next photo, where I’ve pulled him right to me, like literally right on top of my boobs, and he’s laughing and I’m kissing the top of his head.

  Oh my god.

  This photo.

  Not only did I get him to laugh, I’m actually kissing him, with his head on my boobs. Granted it looked to be in a non-intimate kind of way considering there are people in the background of this photo. But still.

  Then there’s the next photo, which is a selfie of just me, making a dramatic sad face, my hair all messy, my lipstick smeared.

  Oh wait, I can see Tai in the background, walking away.

  That was the last photo.

  Thank god.

  I put the phone back down, feeling that guilty, shameful and anxious mix of feelings that you get the day after you’ve had too much to drink and have made a fool of yourself, but can’t quite remember. I just hope that the photos were the worst of it and I didn’t do anything stupid.

  I sigh loudly and decide I can’t hide in my room any longer.

  I get dressed into a simple white sundress and then head over to the bathroom across the hall to do my business and apply a little bit of makeup. I don’t hear anything in the house, which is strange. Perhaps they all went somewhere and left me here.

  Oh, I know what it is. They probably took Lacey and Richard to the marina to see them off. Shit, I would have liked to have at least said goodbye.

  After I’ve done my best to cover up the hangover on my face, I step back into the hall. I poke my head into my parent’s room and see all their luggage. The door to the Wakefield’s bedroom is open and when I call out, no one answers. There’s one more room that has always been shut and I’m tempted to open it, but instead I look inside Lacey and Richard’s.

  To my puzzlement, all their luggage is still here. In fact, one duffel bag is on the bed, half-packed.

  That’s weird.

  I head downstairs, still finding no one, and then finally head out the back.

  Sitting at the patio table in the backyard are Lacey and Richard, with Tai leaning against the house, a beer in hand. There’s a laptop open in front of them, and everyone’s phones are out.

  “Hey,” I say to them. “I thought you left without saying goodbye.”

  Lacey looks up at me, tears running down her face.

  Oh shit.

  “Oh my god, what happened?” I ask her, quickly coming over. My heart jolts in my chest, thinking the worst. “Are mom and dad okay?”

  “Your parents are in town getting provisions,” Richard says calmly. “We’ve had some unexpected bad news.”

  Then both Richard and Lacey look at Tai.

  He gives them a chagrined smile. “I’m telling you, we can work this out.”

  “So, what happened?” I ask, pulling out a chair and sitting down. I have to remember that Lacey does cry over the slightest thing. She has two moods: resting bitch face, and crying.

  “Intrepid, the boat that they were supposed to charter,” Tai explains with a long sigh, “has a problem. A big problem. The last people who chartered the boat put in bad fuel. Meaning, water got in the tank. And I wasn’t here to check on them, so now the boat is fucked and draining the tanks is going to take a few days, at the least. Might even need to bring it out of the water.”

  “My honeymoon is ruined,” Lacey wails, throwing her head back and sniffling into a tissue.

  “It’s not ruined, angel boo,” Richard says, and I cringe inwardly at the nickname. “We’re still going to go sailing.”

  “Isn’t there, like, a shitload of other boats you can charter?” I ask. “I mean, what about all these boats.” With a bold sweep of my arm I gesture to the bay, which has at least a dozen of them at anchor. “They’re everywhere. And they aren’t being used.”

  “Those are private boats and they’re out of the question,” Tai says. “Unless you feel like being arrested for theft. As for chartering, it’s peak season right now, all over the country. Everyone is trying to get their last trip in before autumn comes. Some are available later in the week but…”

  “But we need to leave today or tomorrow in order to make it to Fiji, and then fly back to Dunedin in time for work,” Richard explains. “It’s just not feasible otherwise.”

  “Well, shit,” I say, crossing my arms.

  “But there’s a solution,” Richard adds, eyeing his new bride. “Lacey isn’t too sold on this particular proposition.”

  “What is it?”

  “I still have a boat,” Tai informs me. “My boat. I’m talking my pride and joy. I don’t charter her out. She’s just for me.”

  Richard nods solemnly, then gives me a smile. “Tai has graciously offered to captain the ship to Fiji for us.”

  “Oh,” I say. “Well, that’s great.”

  “He doesn’t trust me with it,” Richard adds under his breath.

  “You’re right, I don’t,” Tai says.

  I give Tai an impressed look. “Well, that’s awfully generous of you to do that for them. I can’t imagine this will be easy.”

  “You’re right. It won’t be easy,” he says. “But it’s something I’ve always wanted to do, and they can consider this an extra wedding present.”

  “You mean you haven’t sailed to Fiji before?” Richard asks, his voice going to a higher frequency.

  Tai has an easy sip of his beer and gives him a dismissive wave. “Relax. It’s a piece of cake.”

  “Fine,” Lacey suddenly says, tossing a rumpled Kleenex into the middle of the table. “Fine, we’ll go on Tai’s boat.” Then her eyes meet mine and there’s some sort of look in them that I don’t like. “But only if Daisy comes with us.”

  I blink at her. “Sorry, what?”

  Meanwhile Tai and Richard both break out into laughter, Richard doing that annoying slapping his knee thing. Who does that?

  “Your sister? On a boat?” Richard can hardly breathe.

  “Yeah, so what?” Lacey asks.

  I mean, Richard has a point, but even so.

  “Lacey,” I say carefully. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

  And I’m absolutely shocked that she’d actually invite me. Since when has she wanted to do any kind of bonding? Maybe getting married is making her turn a new leaf, maybe…

  Then I recognize that look in her eyes.

  This isn’t about bonding.

  This is a challenge.

  “Oh, please,” Lacey says, reaching across the table and putting her hand on mine. “It would be so good for us to finally get to spend some quality time together. You and me, sister to sister.”

  She’s really laying it on thick.

  “Besides,” she adds. “With Tai, that’s an uneven number. I hate uneven numbers. With you it would be four.”

  “I don’t know…” I say. There’s a part of me that is actually considering the idea, just because I’m secretly afraid to go back home to my life of nothing.

  There’s another part of me that feels like I’m stepping into a trap.

  And there’s another part that wants to prove that I can do this.

  “She won’t last a day,” Tai says with a dry chuckle.

  I glare at him, hackles rising. “Excuse me?”

  Tai gives me a wicked grin. Stupid sexy smile.

  “You yourself admitted to me that drinking cocktails at the d
ock is your kind of sailing. You won’t last a day.”

  “I suppose you’re right,” Lacey says with a sigh.

  “Wait, what?” I protest. “Just because I like some cocktails—"

  “Last night you definitely proved that,” Tai mutters.

  I feel my cheeks flame as I try to ignore that. “It doesn’t mean that I’m not up for a little adventure. Don’t you remember me as a kid, Lacey? I wanted to be a marine biologist. I wanted to be one so badly that I used to steal rides on the fishing boats out of Newport. I volunteered at the Newport Aquarium every summer. I was obsessed. The ocean never scared me, it fascinated me.”

  “Every girl wants to be a marine biologist as a child,” Richard comments.

  Lacey nods. “And one day you just decided to give up on that idea and move onto something less hard.”

  “Okay, whoa. Things are getting a little personal now,” I tell her.

  “Look,” Tai says, coming over to us, raising his hands for a moment. “If Daisy really thinks she can handle it, I say the more the merrier.”

  I give him a look. Oh do you now?

  “Where are you going to sleep?” Richard asks him. “There are only two cabins.”

  “Two cabins?” I repeat. “How small is this boat?”

  Tai glowers at me. “It’s not small. It’s a forty-two-foot Tayana.” He looks to Richard. “And I’ll sleep on the couch. I’ve had naps on it before, it’s comfortable enough.”

  “Enough for a ten day voyage?” Lacey asks. “Maybe Daisy should have the couch since we’re going to need the captain operating at his best.”

  Everyone is looking at me.

  I shrug. “Fine, I’ll take the couch. Whatever.”

  “You will not take the couch,” Tai tells me.

  “So does this actually mean you’re coming?” Lacey asks.

  “What about your flight home?” questions Richard.

  “I guess I’ll look into changing it.”

  “Air New Zealand does flights out of Fiji,” says Tai. “You’ll probably be able to fly straight home from there.”

  “Good,” I say. “Then it’s settled.” I look at everyone. “Isn’t it?”

  They all exchange glances, brows raised, and at that moment I can tell that I was never meant to come, that I wasn’t part of the plan.

  But none of this was part of the plan, was it?