Less Broken

by Eve R. Hart

  I bet he was. His dick was trapped between his body and the bed. He had the extra weight of me pushing down on him, and with every thrust, I was moving his body along with mine.

  Hell, I was seconds away from coming myself. Hearing him moan and whimper from all the things I was doing to him caused my body to feel alive all over. Knowing he was enjoying this as much as I was, drove me wild.

  I pulled back and rolled him over.

  His lids were heavy as he looked up at me. His face was flush. His hair was sticking up in all directions. His chest heaved. All I could do was look down at him, taking it all in.

  Then his hands were on my face. He wasted no time pulling my lips to meet his. He gave me his all and I took. I devoured his mouth as he wrapped his legs around me.

  Our hard cocks rubbed together and the friction of my underwear became too much for my overly sensitive flesh.

  “Fuck, baby,” I hissed out when his hand slipped between our bodies to free my cock. His hand wrapped around my length and with slow, agonizing movements, he dragged it up and down my shaft. I pushed up so I could look between us and watch his movements. My cock looked so big and heavy in his hand. The head angry and nearly purple in color. “Pull yours out, work us together.”

  He released me and then was freeing himself from his briefs. I shifted until we were lined up perfectly and he didn’t hesitate a second longer to take us both in his hand. His movements were slow and lazy as he began to jerk us. The feeling of his cock mashed against mine seemed to make me dizzy. I watched as the pre-cum oozed from both of us and like he could read my mind, he swiped his thumb through it, mixing us together.

  “Fuck, Theon,” I hissed as I wrapped my hand around his and held us firmer. I forced him to move faster because I couldn’t take much more.

  My eyes moved up to meet his gaze. There was a glint in his eyes that told me he knew what he was doing to me. I fucking loved it.

  Theon, my sweet, yet devilish, man.

  That thought caused me to pause for a second. Then it hit me like a ton of damn bricks. Theon was mine. He was made for me. Meant for me. He was a gift and it was all mine.

  That was when I knew I wasn’t ever letting him go. No matter all the shit I’d been through and all that I still had to face, I wouldn’t leave him. I wouldn’t leave him behind and in fact, it was the first time that I wanted to fix all the shit in my head. I wanted to be whole again so that I could be the man Theon deserved. So he would want to call me his own.

  “Theon,” I roared as the first jet of cum shot out of my body.

  His free hand wrapped around the back of my neck, and then my lips were on his again. There was so much passion in this kiss that I nearly felt tears in my eyes.

  A long moan spilled from his lips as he came with me. Our orgasms seemed to go on forever and through it all, we kissed. We were connected on a level that I’d never experienced before.

  I pulled back to see Theon’s shining eyes looking a little wet as they met mine.

  He felt it too.

  There were no words either of us could say to express it.

  There were no words needed.

  With a sexy smirk, he forced my hand away from our spent cocks. Then his long, slender finger dragged up his chest, following the long line of us, mixing it even more. He brought his finger up to his lips and a second later, it disappeared into his mouth. I watched on, jaw slack and in total shock. He’d shown me that he wasn’t afraid of sex, at least not with me, but for some reason, I hadn’t expected this.

  “Kiss me,” he whispered. “Taste us.”

  And so I did.

  Taking his mouth with desperation and force.

  He moaned and his body bowed below me as my tongue rolled over his.

  “I—” I started but my mouth just hung open.

  Theon looked up at me. He was waiting for me to finish but I couldn’t.

  I was scared.

  That had been hard to admit to myself, but it was true.

  What if I said those words and he didn’t feel the same?

  What if it was too soon?

  What if he didn’t believe me?

  “Cade.” He said my name softly as his hands came up to cradle my face. “I expect nothing. I’ll take everything you have to give me. And I’ll cherish it forever.”

  This time the tears did sting my eyes. They welled up but I couldn’t let them fall. I had to be strong. Strong for myself. Strong for him. He seemed to read all of this from my expression and he simply smiled up at me.

  I love you.

  I willed him to see the words I couldn’t yet say.

  “Shower with me,” he said and it was like he knew I needed a way out of this moment. It was too powerful and I was on the verge of breaking. Though I wasn’t sure that was quite right. I was at war with myself inside. I felt like I was being pushed and pulled and run over from all different directions. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t seem to get my feet under me.

  No words were spoken as we climbed out of the bed. The tender way he took my hand and led me to the bathroom was too much for me to handle right now. I was torn between thinking I needed him and not feeling that I was good enough for him.

  But then he kissed me.

  And within that kiss, he told me so much.

  I was the man that he needed.

  I was the one that he wanted.

  I was the one he’d choose time and time again, no matter how broken I was.

  I was the one that held his heart.

  26

  Theon

  “Cade,” I whisper-yelled as I pushed on his shoulder. He let out a grunt but that was the only sign of life I received from him. So, I tried again because the persistent knocking coming from the door was not going away. “Cade!”

  He sat up with a jerk, his eyes wide and wild as he looked around. Realizing there was someone at the door, he got to his feet quickly and pulled out a gun from the side table drawer.

  My entire body went stiff as he stalked over to the door. Even completely naked, he looked ready to kill.

  “The fuck, Reed?” Cade breathed out with irritation clear in his tone as he pulled the door open all the way. “Couldn’t have told me you were coming?”

  He relaxed his stance and came back over to the bed, putting the gun down on the small table that held the lamp. Reed casually strolled in behind Cade.

  “Put some clothes on,” he said to Cade but it was almost as if he was laughing.

  “Don’t fucking come at me first thing in the morning and expect me to be dressed,” Cade playfully shot back.

  He bent over, the perfect view of his thickness disappearing from my line of sight. A tiny frown turned down the corners of my mouth. I needed to wipe the fog away from my brain and remind myself that Reed was in the room.

  Cade shot me a look as he hastily ripped his pants up his legs. It was half angry and half apologetic. Clearly, he hadn’t been expecting Reed to show up and now Cade was pouting because the plan of staying in bed all weekend with me had been put to a halt.

  I was disappointed too, of course, but the sight of Cade acting like an unhappy two-year-old was too funny. The mood lifted as I tried to hold my laughter back.

  “Two weekends in a row, huh?” Cade grumbled as he yanked the shirt down over his head and it was clear he wasn’t expecting Reed to give him any sort of answer. “Is this going to be a regular thing?”

  Reed shrugged, a mischievous smile on his face.

  Again, I felt myself holding back laughter.

  “I was hoping I could take Theon to breakfast.”

  Cade froze. Every muscle in his body went rigid.

  Cade had been with me pretty much every single second of every day for the past week. The only time we were separated was when I forced myself to go to class, and even then, he wasn’t far away.

  “Step outside,” Cade said to Reed as he made his way to the door. “Get dressed, baby.” He tossed the words out over his shoulder at me r
ight before he shoved Reed through the still-open doorway.

  I waited until the two men were out of the room before I crawled out of the bed.

  My body wasn’t happy about all the movement but I did as I was told.

  Then I went into the bathroom to brush my teeth and attempted to tame my hair.

  Once I was as decent looking as I was going to get with the limited time I had, I met the two men outside hoping they were playing nice.

  Cade shot daggers at Reed as he pulled me into his body.

  I knew he wasn’t really grumpy, he was just irritated that his sexy, dirty plans had gotten messed up again.

  “See you in a bit,” he said and then kissed me silly.

  “I’ll bring him back, I promise,” Reed said as he slung his arm around my shoulders. He guided me away from Cade and over to a nice looking car that I assumed was a rental. Reed worked a lot and I imagined that he didn’t have the spare time to drive down here, so I figured he’d flown.

  “You hanging in there?” Reed asked me as he pulled out of the parking space.

  I tossed my hand up and waved at Cade hoping it might be just the thing that calmed him down. His eyes were on me until I could no longer see him.

  “Yes,” I answered.

  I was good. I really didn’t have any complaints.

  Sure, I wasn’t all that thrilled about leaving Cade, but there was also a part of me that knew the time apart would be a good thing. If we kept going like we were, we’d end up suffocating this relationship or whatever it was before it even had a real chance.

  “You seem happy,” Reed said once we were on our way. There was a sense of relief in his tone but I didn’t understand why it was there.

  He kept driving. I hadn’t thought about it before now, but I had no clue where he was taking me. He said breakfast so I’d assumed we’d head to the diner again, but if we were, then we could have just walked there.

  I trusted Reed enough to feel safe. Still, I kind of wanted to know where the heck we were headed.

  “I am,” I told him and I didn’t even care that my face held a huge smile.

  “So things are working out?”

  “Yes,” I replied quickly as I turned my head and narrowed my eyes at him. What was he getting at?

  “I’m glad.” He paused, his lips pressed together tightly and I took it to mean he was thinking. “Cade and I are really good friends.”

  “Reed, I know this.” I gave him a pointed look. “What is it that you’re getting at?”

  “Well, I just don’t want that to get in the way.”

  “Huh?” I was confused. How would that get in the way of whatever was going on between Cade and me?

  “We’re friends. We’ve been through a lot together and stuck by each other’s side. But we’ve never… you know… been together, together. I just wanted to put that out there, you know, so there is nothing weird between us.”

  I barked out an awkward laugh which caused Reed’s head to quickly turn in my direction.

  “I’m sorry, I don’t mean to laugh,” I told him. “It’s just that, I’m not worried. I see how he looks at you. Even how he talks to you. There’s nothing that says he’s all hot-and-bothered there. I’m actually glad you have each other. But I’m not worried about you and him. Gay men can be friends with each other, you know?” I added the last part playfully which caused him to laugh.

  “You’re so right. Shame on me for thinking that everyone wants your man.”

  “Well, he is sexy,” I said causing Reed to scowl. “And good in—”

  “Nope! I don’t need or want to know that.”

  The car came to a stop in front of the coffee shop I was already very familiar with. I was completely clueless as to why he’d driven us all the way across town to have breakfast here, it wasn’t like they had that many options. And they certainly didn’t serve pancakes. Man, I could have really gone for some pancakes right about now. I was famished. However, I wasn’t about to tell him that and take a chance on making him feel bad.

  “I know you come here a lot but Cade said you really like the coffee.”

  “I do. Thank you, Reed.”

  “Plus, I kind of want to see the places you hang out. I know you’re a big college boy and all now,” he said like he’d known me all my life. I actually found it really sweet and heartwarming. “But I can be cool and hang with the hip crowd.”

  I groaned and let my head flop back against the headrest.

  “You’re only like thirty, please don’t start sounding like a grandpa before you have your midlife crisis. And never— I mean ever— offer me those peppermint candies. Those things are just gross.”

  “Agreed,” he said laughing as he popped open the car door.

  We headed inside and Reed appeared to take a long moment to scan over the menu of drinks on the wall. I couldn’t tell if he was nervous about hanging out with me or clueless about what he wanted. Once he seemed like he had it all figured out, we got in line.

  “Cade said to make sure you get decaf.” Reed looked amused as he spoke.

  “He’s never going to let me live that down. At least he didn’t tell you about the painkiller incident.”

  Reed’s brow went up and for a second he looked concerned.

  “Let’s just say, I have no filter between my brain and mouth when I take any kind of strong medication. Honestly, I’m surprised he still wanted to hang out with me after that.”

  “Cade’s a good guy. The best, actually,” Reed jumped in with. “He’s going through some stuff, but I have hope he’ll come out on the other side. I guess that’s kind of one of the things I wanted to talk to you about today.”

  “Just one?” I looked over at him with comically wide eyes.

  He laughed but didn’t say anything else.

  We placed our order and I was glad that Marci wasn’t here. I still felt a tiny bit bad about what Cade had put her through this week. Yes, his caveman needs to let the world know he was mine hadn’t stopped that first day. And even though he wasn’t here right now, I knew everyone that had been around to witness it knew exactly what he was doing. If Marci did have a crush on me like Cade suspected, I wouldn’t want to hurt her feelings. I wasn’t that type of person. But I guess it was a good thing that she knew she didn’t stand a chance now because had she confronted me to ask me out, I might have panicked and told her yes.

  I could see how that might have turned out really bad in the long run.

  We found a table in the back corner that was away from everyone else. I took in a deep breath and waited for him to start the conversation back up.

  “I’m only saying this out of concern. You know I care about you, right, Theon?” I gave him a nod. “The things Cade is going through, I don’t want you to be a Band-Aid for them. I’m not sure of everything that’s going on in his head, but I’ve seen enough to know that he hasn’t been in a good place the last six months.”

  “Since he came back…”

  “Yes.”

  “He blames himself. He—” I paused and took in a deep breath. I didn’t like talking about Cade behind his back but I knew Reed had good intentions here. “He believes he should be dead too.”

  “I know,” Reed said with a sad look and a long sigh.

  He felt as helpless as I did. Even when Cade opened up to me and set it free, I didn’t feel that was enough. I hadn’t been able to give him enough of what he longed for in that moment. And if I were smart, I’d realize that it couldn’t all come from me. Maybe I did know that and that was why I hadn’t shut this conversation down. I wasn’t saying that I couldn’t stand by his side and support him at every turn, and I wanted to. I simply knew that there was no quick fix to ease the pain and anger he felt inside. There wasn’t anything I knew how to do that could get him to actually deal and cope with the memories that haunted him.

  “I don’t want him to become dependent on you,” Reed went on. “I don’t want you to have to feel the weight of that. And I don’t wa
nt him to fall apart should things not…”

  His words trailed off and I knew what he was saying.

  He was right.

  What if I was this temporary fix for Cade and he started riding some kind of high? And then what if we didn’t work out in the long run? He’d crash even harder than he did before.

  I didn’t want that, not for either of us. In a perfect world, I’d tell you that this love bubble was real and it would last forever. But the truth of it was, Cade and I barely knew each other. We’d barely touched on one another’s lives and lived in each other’s worlds. The situation we were in had forced us together. And while there were real, deep feelings there, who could say how they would dull once we came back to the real world?

  I understood everything my brother was saying. It was easy to see that this was hard for him. He felt torn between looking out for me and looking out for his friend. There was no way I could be mad even though the look on his face said he was waiting for it. He was expecting this to be something that might break the growing bond between him and I.

  “I get it, Reed, and you’re right. I’ve thought about it some and I’m not blind in all of this. I want what’s best for Cade and I don’t want to lose myself to his darkness. I wouldn’t be any good to him if I did.”

  “Damn, kid,” he said with a tiny smile and a gleam of pride in his eyes. “So much wiser than your years.”

  “You were worried?”

  “I was,” he admitted with a nod. “I’m rooting for you guys, I am, but that’s why I felt the need to say something.”

  “I promise to give him what I can and find him what he needs.”

  “Thanks, Theon. I knew you were special. I’m just really glad I’m not the only one that gets to see how special you are.”

  “Shut up,” I told him with a roll of my eyes. Someone had to break this tense, emotional moment. I was about to cry and I didn’t want to break down in a place I came to nearly every day. “What else did you want to talk about?”

  “Well, uh,” he said as his hand came up to rub his cheek. He looked a little nervous, which made me nervous. “Don’t be mad at Cade, but he kind of told me that you don’t really like it here.”