Lost in Carmel

by Terri Lee

  He was the same old Nico. No games. No guile. A little voice told her to be cautious, it was too soon. But her heart got in the way. She’d spent too many nights dreaming of this moment, of them finding one another again, only to have the morning light come riding in with a harsh reality. But he was here now. Beside her. Telling her he loved her and had never stopped loving her. Words so delicious she could taste them. It was better than a dream.

  “I never stopped loving you,” she said, her eyes filling with tears. “I think I’ve been in a holding pattern. Circling. Waiting. Living life only on the edges. I—”

  His lips pressed against hers, soft and sweet, leaving no room for words, and she fell headlong into his kiss. Leaned in as souls reconnected in a divine recognition. When she opened her eyes, she was staring into the dark hazel depths that had come to save her on so many lonely nights.

  “Shall we continue this conversation upstairs? I just need to hold you.” Nico pressed his forehead against hers. “Come lie next to me, we’ll talk until we run out of words.”

  Her, “yes” was all he needed to hear. He threw a generous tip on the table and grabbed her hand as if he were afraid second thoughts might spirit her away.

  They snuggled close in the elevator to the eleventh floor and walked hand in hand down the plush carpeting, grinning like a couple of elicit lovers grabbing at an afternoon rendezvous. Once inside the room they dropped their coats and pretense on the floor. They were in one another’s arms. He kissed her so hard she felt the air leave her body. Surviving on his breath, like tandem scuba divers sharing one tank. Long, strong fingers were on the small of her back and soon lips could not satisfy the hunger, belly deep.

  When they fell together on the bed, old embers whipped up a new fire. Fresh flames licked at her soul. Her body remembered him. Her mouth remembered the taste of him. Ten years were erased in an instant as the two of them pressed together in a rhythm born in her bones.

  Her arms slid up and around his shoulders, fingers threading through the hair that curled at the back of his neck. He was the feeling she’d been missing as legs hooked around hips, knees parted, and she drew him deep inside. She had the mad desire to fuck him like an animal, all grinding hips and head thrown back in abandon, yet caress every inch of his body with the tenderest of care.

  Later, she would tell Monty that she was sure she left her body and went to meet the gods. She was crying and flying, unrestrained. Unfolding beneath him, tears tracked down her cheeks as emotions crowded around, rolling over her in a wave. With eyes closed, she let them run free. Owning it all. The trembling. The ecstasy. The euphoria and the sadness. She was in and out of reality. At times, unable to grasp the fact that it was Nico’s flesh pressed against hers. His tongue teasing and tempting and warm.

  With hands in her tangled hair, his gravity pulled her in; she was a helpless satellite in a pre-determined orbit around the sun. Yet beneath the whirl of sensations was the certainty that she was where she was meant to be. That somehow, on this clumsy journey she’d found her way home.

  They were hungry explorers in search of remembered treasures. A scar here, a freckle there. Bathed in the milky light from the bedside table, Nico’s lazy finger traced the length of her spine where it reached her derriere.

  “This. This spot right here.” He leaned down to kiss the indentation. “Is the most beautiful thing in the world. I’ve had dreams about your gorgeous bottom.”

  Natalie laughed out loud.

  Sex was a beast pawing at the ground, impatient and greedy, but it was partnered with honied lovemaking, cradling one another as breaths and heartbeats slowed to a whisper. All their appetites colliding and collapsing into one space, behind the door of room eleven-nineteen.

  They wore one another out, laughed, and rested until their appetites roused them again. They made love until the only thing left was his name on her bruised lips. Finally, sleep claimed their exhausted bodies, wrapping them together in a cocoon of arms and legs and sated breath.

  60 Tomorrow

  “Tell me again,” Monty said. “And don't leave out any of the juicy stuff.”

  “Pervert.”

  She'd already filled him in with every detail, every look, every sigh. But a best friend knows the need to tell it again. And again. She'd gladly tell the story a million times and never tire of hearing the words. She told it to herself every night before she fell asleep. Reliving each moment in the telling. Moving the experience from the dream-like state to reality with each rendition. Nico was back.

  Like honeymooners they'd spent the weekend at The Bradbury, living off room service, and adrenaline. They were the last of the human race surviving on a planet the size of a California King.

  “That devious little twat,” Monty said upon hearing about Caterina's interference.

  “I know.” Natalie rolled her eyes. “Believe me, part of me wants to strangle her until her face turns blue, but the mother in me can acknowledge she was suffering. She was damaged. In her warped understanding she believed she was doing the right thing. Nico said it was her idea that he should try to find me again after all these years, that's why she finally told him.”

  “Well, there's that,” Monty conceded.

  “Yes. I suppose I might be able to find it in me to forgive her.”

  “You're a better man than me.” Monty took a drag on his cigarette.

  The two of them were sitting on their favorite bench looking out to the sea.

  “I thought you said you were going to quit smoking.” Natalie gave him a sideways glance.

  “I was. But I changed mind. It’s my only vice after all.”

  Natalie choked around her laughter. “Excuse me?”

  “Well, that and hot young bartenders. Give me a break.”

  “Every time I think about walking into that courtroom with Tess next week, I wish I hadn’t giving up smoking.”

  Monty handed her his cigarette and Natalie placed it between her index and middle finger, remembering the feel of it on her skin. She inhaled deeply, held it, then blew a pale ribbon of smoke over their heads.

  “That’s what a good friend does.” She coughed. “Drag you over to the dark side with them.”

  “You’re welcome.” Monty nodded solemnly. “So, what have you heard about the case?”

  “Nothing more than the last time we spoke. Lew feels pretty confident about a deal with the DA. No jail time. Thank God. A five-year supervised probation with regular drug tests and a hundred and twenty hours of community service. If… the judge agrees.”

  “Why wouldn’t he?”

  “One never knows about these things. Lew says not to worry. But you know me. Worry is my middle name.”

  “This whole thing is about to be put behind you,” Monty said. “Tess is one lucky girl.”

  “Don’t I know it. This could have gone so wrong.”

  “You’ll have your daughter, your lover, and the movie of your dreams all in the palm of your hand. You deserve it all, baby.”

  “I don’t know about deserve, but I’ll take it.”

  Lew’s word was a good as gold. Tess was home free. Brad was still awaiting his trial and would more than likely face some jail time. Natalie, Stan, and Tess celebrated her freedom with a family dinner. As the threesome sat around the table at Antonio’s, each of them had a reason to be thankful for more than the giant plates of spaghetti.

  “You’ve been given a chance to wipe the slate clean, Tessie. Use it wisely.” Natalie reached over and squeezed her daughter’s hand.

  Tess squeezed back. “I’m going to spend the next five years proving you were right not to give up on me.” She turned to her dad. “And I’m going to pay back every cent you spent on Lew.”

  Stan waved her away. “You just spend the next five years staying healthy and that will be payback enough.”

  “Seriously, I owe you guys everything. I’m sorry I’ve been such a shit kid.”

  “No one at this table is above making mistakes,”
Natalie cautioned. “The hard part is owning up to things and then turning them around. You’ve done that. We’re so proud of you. Your future is yours to write.”

  “To the future.” Tess lifted her water glass in a salute.

  “To the future.” The words echoed around the table.

  “Everything is so right, I’m a little afraid,” Natalie said, her head resting on Nico’s bare shoulder, the sheet pulled up to their hips. “I’ve always been the kind of person waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

  “There are no more shoes.” Nico chuckled. “We’re all barefoot. No more worries out of you.” He reached down and cupped her chin in his hand. “This is our time.”

  “Our time,” she whispered. “I like the sound of that.”

  “Speaking of time…” Nico rolled over on his side, facing her. “We’ve lost so much; it hurts to look back. But we have tomorrow. I don’t want to waste another minute. Marry me, Natalie Hampton. Give me all of your tomorrow’s and I’ll spend the rest of my days keeping them safe.”

  Marry Me wrapped its arms around her as she leaned into the possibility. They’d spent every minute they could snatch out of a twenty-four-hour day since Nico showed up a month ago. Every good-bye tore at her soul. And every hello was brand-new. Of course, she would marry him. She’d run away in the back of a gypsy caravan if he asked.

  She nodded slowly, tears tracking down her cheeks. “Yes, my darling Nico, I’ll marry you.”

  He wrapped her tightly in both arms, his eyes closed, breathing deeply as her yes settled in the space between them. “I love you Mia cara. I love you. I love you.”

  He smothered her with kisses. Her lips, her face, her neck… until laughter bubbled up between them.

  “Let’s get married tomorrow.” Nico rose up on one elbow. “I don’t want to wait another day.”

  Natalie grinned. “I understand what you’re saying. I want to marry you this minute. But…”

  “But what?” Nico’s brow came together.

  “You know Stan and I ran off to Reno to get married and though it was fun… part of me thinks maybe we never took the marriage seriously because of how it began. This time I want the people I love around me. Nothing fancy; a simple backyard wedding will do. But I want to celebrate our love and share it with everyone.”

  “You’re right, of course.” Nico reached over and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. “You have it any way you want it. Just tell me where and when. I have only one request…don’t make me wait too long.”

  “I promise.” Natalie leaned in and planted a soft kiss on his pouting lips.

  * * *

  We Do

  But we wouldn’t want to do it without you.

  Please join us at sunset on May 20, 1989

  At Boxwood Cottage,

  Carmel-by-the-Sea, CA 93921

  * * *

  P. S. There’ll be cake

  61 Come Rain or Shine

  “I was robbed once, of my chance to be a bridesmaid, when you and Stan decided to sneak off to Reno,” Monty said. “I won’t be sidelined again.”

  “No bridesmaids, Mont.”

  “Seriously?” Monty’s jaw dropped. “What kind of wedding is this?”

  “The simple kind.” Natalie shook her head at her old pal.

  Monty folded his arms across his chest in a playful pout. “You’re no damn fun.”

  “I’m plenty of damn fun.”

  “You’re just full of yourself, lately, aren’t you? Well, I suppose I could walk you down the aisle. But then there’s always the chance my dress might upstage yours.”

  “Oh my God, would you stop?”

  “On second thought,” Monty dug in deeper, “I would never be able to answer the preacher when he says, ‘who gives this bride’. I’d have to say, I won’t give her away, but I’ll loan her to Nico.”

  “I love you, you big goof.” Natalie grabbed at her friend, pulling him in a giant bear hug. “And I am full of myself. Full of joy. Full of love. Full of everything.”

  “I love you, too.”

  “Besides,” Natalie continued as she pulled back, “I don’t need anyone to give me away. Nico and I will stand at the altar, as two equals.”

  “How modern of you.”

  “Indeed. But as a consolation prize, you can help me pick out my dress.”

  “Thank God.” Monty brightened at the offer. “No frills or buckets of lace, madam.”

  “Of course not, I’m too old for that, anyway. I’m looking for something… sleek, simple. Maybe tea length.”

  “You’re going to be one perfect bride.”

  “Bride.” Natalie tried on the word like a wedding veil, letting it drift over her shoulders. “Can you believe it? I’m going to be a bride. Nico’s bride.”

  “It’s about damn time.”

  Between Nora, Tess, and Monty, Natalie had all the help she could possibly hope for. Before she knew it, it was the day before her wedding and the only thing left to worry about was the weather. The forecast was calling for a slight chance of rain.

  Surely, Mother Nature won’t pick tomorrow to throw a temper tantrum, Natalie thought. Even if she did decide to throw an inch or two of water on the party, Natalie was determined to not let anything dampen her spirits. She was marrying the love of her life, come rain or shine.

  But first, she had one difficult task in front of her. Caterina.

  Of course, Nico wanted his children and grandchildren at the wedding. Caterina and Marius had arrived in Carmel yesterday, with spouses and children in tow. Tonight, she would come face to face with the young woman at the helm of her undoing all those years ago.

  “Wear your highest heels, they make for an excellent weapon,” Monty had offered upon hearing the news. “A high heel straight to the eyeball will show her who’s in charge.”

  Ignoring Monty’s advice, Natalie dressed comfortably, opting for flats in case she decided to run. Nico had said, that Caterina was nervous about meeting her.

  No kidding?

  All kidding aside, Natalie was aware that tonight was about reconciliation.

  The restaurant was busy and parking was at a premium. Natalie had to circle the area twice to find a spot nearby. Gathering her purse from the passenger seat, she took a deep breath to steady her nerves as she closed the car door behind her.

  The DiNatale family was seated at a large table in a private room. Nico was all smiles and stood to greet her as she entered. As they hugged, she caught sight of Caterina over his shoulder. Her dark eyes were wide in anticipation and the pale undertone to her normally olive complexion told Natalie all she needed to know. Nerves on both sides would level the playing field.

  Leandro and Alessa were there too, along with Angelina and her husband, Thomas. And all the kids. Leandro’s children were now teenagers. Angelina’s Pietro was a man in his thirties and still adorable. The little ones belonged to Caterina. And of course, there was Marius, beaming at her from the other end of the table, his arm thrown around the shoulders of his fiancé. The entire room was bursting with Italian conversation and laughter. Little Italy in Carmel.

  Natalie made her way around the room, gathering hugs and kisses like bouquets along the way. Leandro stood, pulling her to him and enfolded her in a pair of powerful arms. “I never gave up on the two of you. Love always finds a way.”

  “Yes, it does.” Natalie leaned back in his arms. “But sometimes it takes the scenic route, getting there.” She patted his shoulder and moved on to the next pair arms outstretched toward her.

  She was the prodigal child welcomed home with a feast; the eye in the center of an Italian tornado. Kisses on both cheeks, hugs, and hands reaching out to grab her attention had her turning this way and that.

  Finally, it was Caterina’s turn. She rose from her chair, placing her napkin on her seat. Gone was the impudent, cynical glare that had accompanied Natalie’s memories of the young girl. Standing before her now, was a young woman. A wife. A mother. Long, dark hair still flowed
over her shoulders, but there was a new softness to her, a Madonna quality that immediately caught Natalie’s attention. Both women made a move as they came together, but neither seemed to know what to do with their hands.

  Caterina took a deep breath in an apparent leap of faith as she opened her arms to Natalie.

  Natalie stepped inside the circle and accepted what was offered. There was nothing hiding behind Caterina’s nervous smile, and Natalie could feel her own guardrail give way.

  Caterina leaned in towards Natalie’s ear. “I’m so sorry. I have so much to apologize for, I hope we can talk later.”

  Natalie placed her hand on Caterina’s arm; she could feel her heart melting toward Nico’s daughter. “We will. We have all the time in the world.”

  Dinner was a typical Italian affair. Plates of pasta passed back and forth. Lots of good-natured teasing and everyone talking over one another. Through it all ran a ribbon of love like a river through the valley and Natalie’s heart swelled at the realization that these people were now her family. She belonged to them and they belonged to her, and that river of love would sweep her along in its current.

  While dessert was being served, Caterina leaned over to Natalie. “Would you mind joining me on the patio while I smoke?”

  “Sure.” Natalie pushed back from the table. “I’ll be right back,” she said to Nico.

  “I hardly know where to begin.” The young woman fumbled with her pack of cigarettes. “I’ve rehearsed this so many times. Now I can’t seem to find the right words.”

  “Don’t worry about finding the right words, just speak from the heart.”

  Caterina nodded, blowing a smoke ring out over the potted ferns that lined the patio.

  “I can’t tell you how sorry I am for my behavior, for the pain I caused you and my father, your daughter… everyone. I deserve your scorn. All of it. There really is no excuse.”

  Natalie sat on a concrete bench and patted the seat next to her.