Didn't I Say to Make My Abilities Average in the Next Life?! Volume 6

by Funa

  “Um, I was thinking that it might be good for you to put some countermeasures in place, to avoid anything like this happening again later on…”

  Mile explained her plans:

  First, she suggested that he hold some educational conferences in order to teach the villagers a few basics about the country and the tax system, and about what would happen if they tried to disrupt that, using the ruined foreign village as an example.

  Second, she advised him to carefully select some villagers and hire them as information gatherers—in other words, spies. Set them up three to a village, with each of them assuming that they’re the only one there.

  Third, Mile said, in villages where there was still a bit of resistance, the lord might send an appointed agitator who could knock the wind out of the villagers with a little “controlled tension,” as well as bring any other dangerous parties to light.

  Fourth…

  Mile went on and on. The lord had initially been delighted to meet her, having been told that she was an “honest girl with a strong sense of justice, who was wise and skilled with a sword.” However, as their talk drew on, the smile on his face began to twitch. Of course, Mile only continued, not noticing a thing. And then…

  “Young lady, what would you think of becoming my family’s vassal?”

  Already, the invitations had started.

  “Oh no! I’m really just a normal, average girl. To have such a high status would be…”

  “Well then, what of becoming my adopted daughter?”

  “Oh no! I’m really just a normal, average girl. To have such a high status would be…”

  Desperately she turned down one offer after another.

  “Oh!”

  Finally, Mile had a realization: this was the fifth and final day of her vacation.

  It wouldn’t do her any good to return too late. At the very least, she needed to get back before dinner, and already the sun was beginning to set.

  “Crap! If I just run normally, I’ll never make it in time!”

  And so, Mile made the decision to use the special “emergency measure” that she had thought up on the off chance of just such a situation.

  “Nanos, if you would!”

  RIGHT AWAY!

  Cancel gravity! Yes, just like the gravity-neutralizing material cavorite…

  As Mile pictured the effect of the magic she wanted in her head, she issued a verbal command to the nanomachines as well.

  “Negate gravity in the perimeter!”

  At the moment when she could no longer feel the weight of her own body, Mile kicked off from the ground. She shot steeply upward until she was higher than the highest mountains in the region.

  “Distort lower gravity, change horizontal movement to the direction of the capital, and then release the selective gravitational canceling. Now beginning countdown: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, go!”

  She began to fall in the opposite direction from which she had ascended. Directly toward the ground.

  “Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!! Th-the wind pressure! My clothes! My clothes are gonna fly right off!!! B-barrier! Barrieeeeeeeeeeeerrr!!!”

  “I don’t know what I was thinking…”

  It was thus that Mile returned to the inn where her companions were waiting, with only a story as her souvenir, not knowing that she was to be harshly rebuked for all that she had done without the rest of her party.

  Side Story:

  Kurihara Misato’s

  Otaku Life

  “Where’s big sis?” Misato’s younger sister Keiko asked her mother one day.

  “The usual place,” her mother replied. When it came to Misato’s whereabouts, the only places she could ever be found besides her room and the “usual place,” were the toilet and the bath.

  The usual place. This was the Kurihara family’s study. Her father thought of the room as belonging to him, but in truth, Misato was the one who spent far more time there. When her father, who did not get home from work very early, was not around, Misato could most often be found there. When she was not at school, of course.

  You see, this room contained her parents’ collection: an immense library of books, manga, Blu-ray discs, DVDs, CD-Rs, laser discs, video tapes (both VHS and Betamax), U-matics, and various other video player formats with the videos to match, as well as every game system starting from the first-generation Famicom and the games to go with them (including the total shovelware that most wouldn’t deem even worth keeping around). All of it was crammed tight onto a set of crank-operated shelves.

  Indeed, the weight of this collection was so immense that it had to be accounted for in the very blueprints of the house, with countless concrete piles driven down into the bedrock underneath it when the house was constructed. The compensation they’d had to offer the neighbors was apparently equally immense. After all, it would have caused quite a lot of noise and vibration.

  Naturally, this room also contained large television screens and projectors for displaying those movies and games. When Misato wanted to flip through something alone or look at something that she did not want her family to see—or when her father was home—she would watch things in her room. However, when that was not the case, it was much preferable to watch shows and play games on the big screen, sitting back in a nice, comfy chair. At times, Keiko joined her, and there were even times when Keiko wished to watch things independently, but unlike Misato, Keiko had little fascination with vintage works and garbage games. She was more interested in modern productions, so more often than not, Misato was left entirely to her own devices.

  After a short while, Misato emerged from her “usual place.” She was wearing a set of hooded cat pajamas. They were much comfier than normal clothes, so Misato usually wore them at home. When guests came over, she simply refused to emerge from her room—not even to go to the bathroom.

  Misato also had dog, bear, and bunny-patterned pajamas. She had a set of bird-patterned ones as well, but the arms were blocked up by wing shapes, and she was unable to use her hands while wearing them, which was a problem when she needed to turn the pages of a book or manipulate a controller. For that reason, those remained perennially packed away.

  “What were you watching today?” her mother asked.

  “Rainbow Sentai Robin. Oh, I wish I could ride Pegasus along with Bell…” Misato replied.

  Incidentally, the “Pegasus” she was referring to was not an actual winged horse but a rocket-powered transforming robot by the same name. Bell was a cat-shaped robot in charge of the radar.

  “Wouldn’t you rather ride along with Robin?”

  “There’s not enough room inside of Pegasus for us both. Plus, Robin should be with Lili!”

  “My, my… Still, you should at least watch something in color instead of black and white… How many times have you watched that now, anyway?”

  “Talk about something that I can understaaaaaand!!” Keiko complained, as Misato and their mother jabbered away. The girls’ father would have been able to understand the conversation perfectly, but all of their references were going well over Keiko’s head.

  “Well, that’s why I keep saying you should watch…” Misato started.

  “Do you think I have time for that?!” Keiko yelled. “I have to study twice as hard as you do just to get the same marks, Misato! I get compared to you all the time! Just try putting yourself in my shoes!”

  “Should I lower my exam scores, then?”

  “Don’t make me even more pathetiiiiiiic!!!”

  Though she was shouting angrily, this conversation was a regular one, a practiced bit of theirs. While she did not score in the top percentile of nationwide exam scores like Misato did, Keiko was still in the top of her class at school, a rightful honors student. Plus, unlike Misato, who fell incredibly short in areas outside of her exceptional grades, Keiko, who was chock-full of common sense and was the conscientious class-rep type, was popular—among boys and girls alike.

  However, whenever Misato pointed this out, Keiko would
wince and change the subject…

  The next day.

  “Handkerchief, tissues, cell phone, wallet, lunch box. Do you have everything? Ahh! Your hair’s sticking up! Here, bend down a bit!”

  As she did every morning, Keiko was busying herself with Misato’s pre-school check. To those outside of their family, Misato seemed like the perfect girl, but it was all a sham.

  In truth, she was very much a fixer-upper, outside of her scholarly and physical capabilities. Perhaps because she was always off in her head daydreaming, she was incredibly absentminded when it came to her surroundings, constantly losing or dropping things. Plus, she was indifferent when it came to her personal appearance. Her personal hygiene was just fine, but she was uninterested in hair, makeup, and all the other things that girls typically did to try and “improve” their appearance.

  This had been fine when she was in elementary school, but it was unacceptable once she reached middle school and beyond, so eventually Keiko had ended up taking charge of her outfits and general beauty routine.

  “All right, let’s get going… Wait, where’s your backpack?!?!”

  “Oh…”

  “I swear, Misato! You’d be better off inventing some fourth-dimensional pocket and stashing all your stuff in that! Then at least it’d be with you wherever you go…”

  Even the cell phone that Misato had with her was what you’d call a “feature phone”—there was no way she could ever have a smartphone. Why, you ask? She had no idea how to use one, even though she could use a computer just fine. Anyway, the only numbers she had programmed in her phone were those of her family members.

  “All right, I’m off. I want you to head straight to your classroom. If someone who isn’t one of your classmates starts talking to you and you don’t know them, then deal with them appropriately. We don’t need you agreeing to something weird and going along with some stranger like last time!”

  “O-okay…” Misato set off at a leisurely pace while Keiko rushed off to the building that housed her classroom.

  Though she had let herself move along in a carefree daze while she was with Keiko, the moment she was alone, Misato quickly put on a serious face. It was not that her demeanor up until now had been an act—it was merely that she was lonesome by herself, and her caution had shot to max levels as it always did.

  Given Misato’s tendency to mild face-blindness, there were plenty of situations where someone whom Misato was speaking to knew who she was, but she did not know them. Keiko had berated her on multiple occasions for the number of times she almost went along with stalkers, as her face was well known both at school and around town. If someone were to suddenly speak to her, she had no idea if it was an acquaintance or a complete stranger. Thus, she was now constantly on edge whenever she was alone.

  Seeing how alert she was, others would look at her and think, “What a splendid young lady! Look how sharp and good-looking she is!” However, in truth, Misato herself would never have thought such a thing.

  “All the best!”

  When Misato entered the classroom, she was greeted by the class representative. For some reason, “Gokigenyo,”—or in English, “All the best”—a phrase best used when parting from someone—had become popular as the main greeting for the girls of this school. When used in parting, they would say it while gently waving their hands at waist level. From the wrist only.

  Speaking of the greeting…

  There was a television program called Raion no Gokigenyo, or “A Lion’s Well Wishes.” On the show, an actress once went to Africa, got attacked by a lion, and was brutally injured, according to the news reports. Shortly after, the chairman was quoted as saying, “I guess that was a greeting from the lion!”

  Whether it was true or an urban legend, Misato had no idea, but suddenly recalling that phrase, she wanted ever so desperately to say it, so much so she could burst, but she refrained.

  “All the best…”

  At least Misato could distinguish between her classmates. Misato was especially grateful to the class rep, who worried the most out of them over the solitary Misato.

  “Um…”

  “What’s up?”

  “No, it’s nothing.”

  Misato stopped herself from saying what she wanted to before she could even open her mouth, a slightly dark expression on her face.

  That’s our Kurihara-san! She always keeps her worries to herself with a cool expression. Such a graceful manner! She’s so mature…

  As they watched the exchange between the two, Misato’s classmates’ thoughts ran wild.

  The topic that had suddenly crossed Misato’s mind—which she was on the verge of bringing up—was, “The first real breakout magical girl was Megu-chan, wasn’t it?” That was the question she had wished to ask, utterly without expression.

  Even if I had said it, she probably wouldn’t understand…

  The thought was a sad and lonesome one.

  Even during their lessons, there were always many gazes that turned Misato’s way—especially from the boys. However, when it came to break time, no one dared speak to her.

  She was a brilliant flower blooming out of reach, whom no one could actually speak to.

  Plus, even if anyone did work up the courage to say something, there would be a mob waiting for him afterward, ready to put the presumptuous fellow back in his place.

  Misato was everyone’s dream, a prize of the highest honor. In other words, she was communal property.

  Plus, even if they did try to talk to her…

  “U-um, Kurihara-san, who are your favorite actors and performers?”

  “Vic Morrow and Kurizuka Asahi.”

  “What about your favorite TV show…?”

  “I Dream of Jeannie.”

  “Do you watch anime or things like that? What are your favorite—”

  “Kimba the White Lion and Princess Knight.”

  “Did you see the AKB event yesterday?”

  “Did something happen in the formerly Soviet Russia?”

  “No, I’m talking about AKB48…”

  “Is that an improvement on the AK-47 model? Is it 5.45mm caliber?”

  Their conversations would not align in the slightest.

  Her parents’ media collection did not contain many recent offerings. And as Misato herself had no interest in recent productions and did not watch anything in real time, she had only watched the older works from said collection. It was the same whether it came to movies or dramas or anime or games.

  Furthermore, Misato had never acquired the high level art of steering her own topics of conversation to match that of her partner. As a result, it was rare that anyone spoke to her in the first place, and even when they occasionally did, the interaction was rarely a success.

  Anyway, anyone who would try to talk to her outside of school was either a flirt, a suspicious talent scout, a stalker, or some other member of the rogues’ gallery.

  Truthfully, there were probably some earnest students mixed in among the “flirts,” but as far as Misato was concerned, they were all unknown subjects between whom she could make no distinctions.

  “You didn’t run into anyone strange today, did you, sis?”

  “No. I only had a university student and some forty-year-old who was a higher-up at some company or other try to talk to me.”

  “And you don’t think that qualifies as ‘strange’?!”

  If only everyone knew of Misato’s manner and her general shabby state while at home. Perhaps they might have seen her as more approachable and come to think of her as a normal high school girl, just like them.

  Well, no. Had that happened, she would have simply had even more girls and boys flocking around her, and Misato’s peaceful existence during her time at school would have vanished. Perhaps it was because Keiko sensed this that she never shared the truth about Misato with others…

  “Ah, Mom said she was gonna be home late tonight.”

  “Oh, should I make dinner, then?”
/>   Cooking was another of Misato’s talents.

  Following a recipe to the letter was just like applying a mathematical formula, or a physics or chemistry experiment. If you followed the steps correctly, you’d achieve the correct result. With those principles and reasoning, as well as a little thought, she could unravel any puzzle, so she was generally able to produce a meal without difficulty or mishap.

  That said, when she tried to recreate the peculiar dishes that she saw in manga or anime, her success rate was only about 50-50.

  “S-so what’s our menu for tonight, then?” Keiko cautiously inquired.

  Misato, who had been rummaging through the refrigerator, turned and declared with a smile, “Hanada Kousaku, the Curry General’s famous Black Curry!”

  “Gaaaaaaaah!!!”

  ***

  And then, she awoke in another world.

  After her reawakening as Misato, Adele’s consciousness was a mix of Misato’s memories along with the ten years of life that she had lived as a young noble girl, both swirled together in a memory stew. Therefore, when it came to Misato’s weak points—her inability to deal competently with others—the part of her that was Adele, the ten-year-old girl, and not the part of her that was Misato—took the lead. This girl was far better than Misato when it came to such things, after all…

  And if Misato, influenced by Adele’s spirit, did things like a ten-year-old girl would, no one would think it strange. The body she was currently in was that of a ten-year-old girl, anyway.

  Adele, who conducted herself like a ten-year-old girl when it came to conversation with others, blended right in with her classmates at the academy… Well, actually, she was still a bit young for her age, but the others sensed this, treating her like a little sister. Indeed, there was not a single person there who thought that Adele was more serious or mature than the rest.

  And of course Misato, who had led a lonesome, solitary school life the first time around, enjoyed this time to her fullest.