Now Presenting (I'm No Princess Book 1)

by Elizabeth Stevens

  The girls I knew less about. Carolina and Faith were still at school and as far as I knew it was a boarding school that kept them away from the palace most of the year. Lia had gone to a school near Dad’s estate, so hadn’t had a chance to spend much time with them during the year either. The girls were apparently lovely, but could be boisterous and a little naïve. But Dad said I’d get along with them both really well and I was looking forward to meeting them the most.

  My musings and some movies led me through fits of snoozing and a refuel stop in Dubai where snippets of dream were haunted by images of me being stuffed into bouffanty dresses and making a fool of myself in front of an entire country of people. It was probably going to happen, but a reminder was certainly uncalled for.

  So the twenty plus hours passed relatively quickly before Dad’s hand was on my shoulder and the smile on his face told me he’d temporarily forgotten all his worries. The man looked almost perfectly at peace.

  “Welcome home, kiddo,” he said softly and kicked his head over me towards the window.

  I was loathe to take my eyes off the pure contentment on his face, but I turned and looked out the window. Under us were rolling hills. Houses dotted the landscape in the fading sunlight. There was snow on the mountains and copses of trees, and patches across the fields. Lights were already twinkling up at us from cars and buildings and there was something magical about the whole scene, something that hit me deep in a place I didn’t know I had.

  I’d always had a love/hate relationship with thinking of Gallyr as home. For one, I’d never been there, always putting off suggested trips or being too sick to travel. But, it had always held half my heart – first because of Dad and then because of Lia – so I’d always loved it in some way.

  But I’d never realised just how much I loved it until I was looking down on it beside the most important man in my life.

  It really did feel like I’d come home.

  Gallyr had always held half my heart. Now, it seemed it had the whole damned thing.

  Although, I didn’t know yet just how true that realisation was…

  Chapter Two

  When we’d been met on the tarmac by a guy who was quite clearly a bodyguard – who Dad called Sergei – I’ll admit I was impressed and not in the least intimidated. When the car drove through the streets of Albia, the Gallyrian capital, I was even more impressed by the seamless combination of the old quaint and the new hip.

  The old-looking stone buildings had been modernised in a way that looked like the place had been built with modern progress in mind. Flower-filled window baskets sat beside screens like they were made to be there. The people that strolled the cobbled streets were all elegant and refined in their winter finery, the children adorable, the pets well-behaved.

  “Did you bring out the actors for my first day?” I asked.

  Dad laughed, not looking up from his phone where he was dealing with a last-minute email. “It’s just how this part of town is, kiddo.”

  As we sped along, I ogled the place like I’d never seen a town before.

  But that was nothing on when we pulled up to the castle walls and drove under the portcullis through to a huge courtyard. It was like a freaking legitimate castle! I was just being cavalierly let into a freaking castle.

  Whoever had given me my noble license should probably have their qualifications checked and possibly revoked. I already knew I was going to break something a thousand years old and priceless. Then there’d probably be a public execution and I’d somehow manage to accidentally behead the executioner.

  “Welcome to Gallyria Palace, kiddo,” Dad said as the car door was opened.

  I twisted and turned, trying to look at the whole thing at once as I fell out of the car and a hand caught my arm before I ended up with my arse in the snow.

  “Allow me, Lady Tatiana,” a voice said and I looked up to find a stupidly tall guy with average brown hair and average brown eyes but steeped with kindness. Like Sergei, he was wearing a black suit, black shirt and black tie. I could see the earpiece that marked him as a bodyguard, too. That, or I watched too many movies.

  “Uh, thank you.”

  “Ah, Nikolai. Excellent timing,” Dad said as he got out of the other side of the car with a thousand times more grace than I would ever have.

  “Your Grace, good to have you back,” this Nikolai answered as he let go of me and moved to help Sergei with our bags from the boot.

  “It is good to be back, Nikolai.”

  “His Majesty is ready for you in the Great Drawing Room, Your Grace,” another voice said and I turned to see a guy in what looked like formal tails, with a bunch of people standing behind him in equally formal uniforms.

  “Thank you, Medina. Come on, kiddo. Time to meet royalty,” Dad said.

  I turned and found him heading up the steps to the huge front doors. “What?”

  Dad wasn’t the only one who paused what they were doing to look at me in surprise. I blinked and felt my cheeks flush.

  “I mean… Now?” I hissed as I looked down at myself.

  “Rex has spent over eighteen years hearing all about you, Anya. And he’s heard even more since Lia arrived. He knows what to expect.”

  “Yeah, but does everyone else?” I muttered, looking at the staff who were staring at me with barely concealed condescension.

  Medina bowed perfunctorily and followed Dad. I took a step and squealed as I slipped on the wet ground. Nikolai must have been a vampire or something, because the guy was a nanosecond away from saving me. But I felt the impact of the flagstones on my butt and the pain wasn’t the only thing that seeped through my jeans.

  “Ow…” I breathed.

  “Are you all right, Lady Tatiana?” Nikolai asked, crouching down to look me in the eye.

  “Are bodyguards supposed to laugh at ladies, Nikolai?” I asked him, fighting my own smile.

  “I wouldn’t dare, my lady,” he replied, but the corner of his mouth twitched.

  “Anya! Come on, kiddo!” Dad called, sounding exasperated but like he too was hiding a smile.

  I let Nikolai help me up, knowing my hip was going to bruise. “Thanks.”

  “Always, my lady.”

  I rolled my eyes at him, but he hovered by my elbow until I was safely at the front door. And I had to admit I didn’t hate that he might save my other hip if my feet decided to betray me yet again.

  “You good?” Dad asked as he took over Feet Watch.

  “I got my first Gallyrian bruise.” I smiled and he laughed.

  “Never change, kiddo,” he said as he put an arm around my shoulder and kissed my hair, directing me towards a door to the left of the entrance hall.

  “Is that not the whole point of me coming here?” I asked, only half-teasing.

  “I’m sorry–”

  “Dad, don’t do that,” I sighed, knowing I shouldn’t have started it. “I wanted to do this. I wanted to be with you. I get some changes are necessary. I mean I’ll never be Lia with the balls and the dresses and the elegance, but I can deal with a few changes.”

  “Anya, before we go in there, I need to–”

  “Can we just get this over with?” I asked, giving him a smile. “Please. Whatever it is, I promise to deal with it in a proper adult manner after I meet the king.”

  Dad took my shoulders in his hands and looked down into my eyes. “I love you, Tatiana. I am so happy you’re here and I am so proud of you. Remember that.”

  I nodded. My heart beat a little harder, but I could do this. It was only Dad’s oldest friend and his wife and my sister. I took a deep breath and followed Dad into the room. It was beautiful, much like the rest of the place – but of course it was, it was a palace. And inside there were all the people I expected to see.

  Lia was smiling at the queen, looking impeccable in her woven dark olive long-sleeved dress, dark brown tights and matching booties. Her light brown hair – so much like mine – fell aroun
d her shoulders in perfect waves, her makeup looked minimal but I’d seen her without it only a couple of days ago and I knew it was hiding a huge red splotch on her chin, and she held herself like she belonged in this world.

  Dad’s oldest friend, Reginald Amadeus Brevich, His Majesty the King of Gallyr, was tall with brown hair and blue eyes – I recognised him easily from all the pictures dating back to him and Dad in bonnets. He wore a simple dark grey suit, blue shirt and dark blue tie. He laughed with an open, booming laugh that made me smile. If you didn’t know he was the king, then you’d have thought he could be any regular dad, only with excellent fashion taste and a whole lot of money.

  Next to him, his wife Mathilde took his arm as she said something to Lia. She looked like every perfect Disney princess full grown and living her happily ever after with her coifed blonde hair and brown eyes. She wore a pink dress and jacket with matching pumps and a string of perfect pearls at her throat.

  And – HOLY SHIT – there was an unexpected fourth person in the room standing staring into the fireplace, one hand resting on the mantle, the other in his pocket, and one ankle crossed over the other.

  He wore a dark navy suit, the top button of his white shirt was undone and he had a white pocket square. He had dark brown hair that was sitting perfectly and his profile was enough to make my heart stutter and my mouth go dry. As I looked at him, he turned and our eyes locked. And, yep, he was just as gorgeous from the front as he was from the side. Shame his unimpressed, dour expression sort of ruined it and knocked him down the hotness scale about a thousand points.

  I watched as the crown prince of Gallyr – because I’d only spent my whole life seeing pictures of these people (only pictures didn’t seem to do them justice) – pushed himself off the mantle and nodded to Dad. “Max, welcome home,” he said as he stood straight and slid one hand back into a pocket. I think I died a little on the inside at the way his voice slid over my skin. Even though it was flat and monotone, something about it did something ridiculous to my insides.

  “Thank you, Dmitri,” Dad answered as the rest of the room turned to look at us.

  Rex smiled at me like Dad always smiled at me – with nothing but love and affection and like he’d been waiting to meet me forever. Hilde smiled at me like my arrival was the most wonderful thing and not a hint of insincerity on her face. And my dearest big sister gave me a rueful smile at my outfit, but I knew she was pleased to see me.

  If I could have hightailed it out of there and changed… Nope. I so wouldn’t have because the laziness was strong with this one.

  Unlike Lia, I didn’t do the Kate Middleton look. I did the Avril Lavigne video clip reject look. Case in point, I’d travelled half the world in Converse, cargo pants, belt, t-shirt, hoody, hair in a messy…well, bun would be a generous description for the bunch of hair on my head.

  Dad nudged me and I took a step forward. Only to catch my foot on the rug on the floor and nearly face plant. Dad grabbed my arm and managed to keep me vaguely vertical. My face flushed again and I huffed a laugh.

  “Okay. At least no more bruises!” I said as I looked to the king and queen.

  “Tati,” Lia chastised and came over to hug me.

  I put my arms around her and held her tightly. She felt slightly more stilted than usual, but I put that down to having not seen her in a while.

  “Excellent first impression,” she teased.

  “Bitch.”

  “Jerk.”

  I pulled away from her with a smile and saw Dad was talking to the king and queen. Lia tucked a piece of hair behind my ear and beamed at me in a way that I knew she was happy to have me there even if I embarrassed her.

  “Anya, I would like you to finally meet Rex,” Dad said as he held his hand out to me.

  I checked the floor for tripping hazards and stepped forward. I wiped my hands on my pants and smiled at the king. “Nice to meet you, your majesty.”

  Rex smiled and pulled me into a crazy tight hug. “When it’s just us, please call me Rex, Anya. It’s wonderful to have you here.”

  I wasn’t quite sure what to do with my hands, but he pulled away from me before I could make a decision and indicated to his wife.

  “Hilde, she’s finally here,” he said and she gave me that smile that made me feel like they had legitimately been so excited to meet me.

  “I know, Reginald.” Her warm tone made my heart flutter. “Oh, look at you, dear.” As she looked me over, I saw a flicker of surprise in her eyes, but I couldn’t tell if she was disappointed or not. “It is wonderful to finally meet you.”

  She hugged me close as well. When she pulled away, she looked over her shoulder at her eldest child.

  “Mitya, were you going to say hello?” she asked like any chastising mother.

  Dmitri stepped forward. When he was a few paces from me his feet snapped together perfunctorily and he inclined his head. “Lady Tatiana, it is a pleasure to meet you.”

  Something emanated from him. I could see it in his eyes as they stared into mine. His eyes were as dark a brown as his hair and something deep and dark sat in them as he looked me over like I was less than nothing to him. He may as well have been carved from marble by Michelangelo himself the way his face seemed frozen in that cold glare.

  I nodded, totally flabbergasted in the face of such indifference. “Uh, you too, your highness.”

  “Dmitri for friends, Anya,” Rex said with a teasing smile.

  I highly doubted that Dmitri considered anyone a friend, or approved of my calling him anything so familiar. But I nodded again.

  “Of course. Dmitri.”

  Something in his face twitched like he was annoyed, but he just bobbed his head as his eyes looked me over. And I’ll tell you, I was found very wanting. More wanting than if Great Gran had been looking at me.

  “Well,” Rex chuckled and I couldn’t tell if he was dispersing the awkwardness caused by his son and heir or if he was just excited. “Kostin is away on business, Nico is unfortunately not going to be back for a few days, and the girls are still at school, but the seamstress is coming tomorrow.”

  I looked at Lia, expecting she was having some other party or something. But then I realised everyone was looking at me. Dmitri included.

  “Wait what?” I asked.

  “Uh, now. Kiddo, don’t–”

  “You didn’t tell her?” Lia asked, a smile tugging on her lips.

  “Didn’t tell me what?” I hedged.

  “The ball!” Hilde cried, full of smiles.

  “Um…sorry?” I looked around the room, hoping anyone would give me an explanation.

  “It is tradition for the daughter of nobility to be presented to society. As such, you must be presented to society.” Could Dmitri’s voice get any flatter?

  “I’m being what?” my voice rose in a screech and even I winced. “Sorry. But I’m what?”

  “Anya, I was trying to tell you this outside.”

  I shook my head. “No, no, no,” I breathed. “That’s Lia. I’m not… I don’t do… Dad!” I whirled on him. “I can’t get out of a car to meet the king without falling on my arse. How the fu–” I cleared my throat and slid my eyes to the royals in the room. “How am I supposed to manage a ball?”

  “That’s what the lessons are for, dear,” Hilde said as though they did it all the time.

  I blinked. “Lessons? Lessons in what? I just finished my exams. I was hoping for a bit of time off before more lessons!” Oh my God, I was starting to hyperventilate. “Dad, we said okay to the manor and if I had to look like…” I waved at Lia with a ‘no offense’ look, “that. But, a ball? For me? No.”

  “You knew you’d have to go to balls, kiddo…” Dad said slowly.

  I held a hand up to him. “Go to balls, Dad. Not my own ball. I’m supposed to do the sidle into the room, park my butt with a beer and hopefully not spill it on anyone. I’m not… I remember what Lia said about her ball and I…” My voice cut
out and I swallowed hard. “Look at me!” They all did, and Dmitri especially proved my point. “I can’t do that.”

  “It is amazing what you can achieve with a bit of time and money,” Dmitri said in his monotone.

  I looked at him, but there was no support in his tone. It was all condescension and… No, it wasn’t even condescension. He was blank, indifferent, with the smallest bleed of anger and annoyance. I’d been told for years that Konstantin was the robot. Well, seemed to me that he wasn’t the only one.

  Finally, I scoffed. “I think we’ll need more than time or money to fix this mess,” I said.

  Dmitri gave a single nod. “Yes. But we are not magicians.”

  My mouth dropped open as I took a moment to realise that he’d actually just said that.

  Hilde smiled. “Do not worry, Anya. Nico is an accomplished dancer and a decent tutor–”

  Dmitri snapped something in rapid Gallyrian to his mother and my father was the one who answered. Whatever he’d said made Dmitri look at me quickly and say something else. I looked at him expectantly, but no one explained what the exchange was about. When I looked at Lia, she was no help either. Everyone just stood in silence.

  “Okay. So, who wants to tell me when the ball is at least?” I finally asked, pretending they hadn’t just all been having a conversation without me because I was the only one in the room who didn’t speak Gallyrian. Yet, I promised myself.

  “It is on the eighth of December,” Rex answered.

  I blinked. “And we’re definitely doing this then?”

  Rex smiled. “You will be wonderful, Anya.”

  I tried to smile back and decided now was as good a time as any to do that whole being a Lady thing. “I appreciate that, Rex. But you’ve only just met me. You think Lia had a hiccough? You’ll think she was born to this when you see me.”

  Dmitri muttered something in Gallyrian again and I could tell it was nothing complimentary.

  I drew myself up. “I’ll do my best, but I promise nothing.”