Because She Could: The unputdownable debut novel that spans the globe (The Osprey Series Book 1)

by Kaylie Kay

  ‘Brilliant, I hope the others got it.’

  ‘Me too,’ she said, seeing the HKG code. She scanned along – JFK, MCO, SEP. ‘Ugh, I got SEP,’ she complained. ‘Please tell me they put you on that with me.’

  ‘No, mine’s not due till April, and as much as I love you I’m not doing that four months early!’ She laughed.

  Olivia sighed; the last thing she needed right now was having to study those huge manuals and go through three days of exams and practicals. It was the biggest downside to the job, the annual recurrent, but if you didn’t put the work in and pass there was a real danger of losing your job, and people did.

  ‘Well I’m not studying until after Christmas.’ It was early December and Olivia already felt sad about the upcoming holidays; she wasn’t going to make it worse by doing that as well.

  ‘At least we have New York, Orlando and Hong Kong though,’ said Claire. looking over her shoulder.

  ‘Do you fancy getting on a flight over Christmas with me? I don’t think I can bear being at home.’

  ‘Hell yeah, I was dreading spending it with my lot, all arguing!’ Claire had five brothers and sisters and when they all got together it was quite rowdy. The girls had both been fortunate at first to have been rostered Christmas off when so many crew who wanted to be at home were having to fly. It would make someone’s day when they offered to do their flight.

  ‘How about Dubai? There are two crew here with it up for swap.’ Claire was already looking on the swap page.

  ‘Sounds great, a bit of sunshine, get us on it,’ Olivia instructed her friend who set about getting things sorted.

  ‘Done,’ announced Claire ten minutes later, looking pleased with herself.

  Olivia was distracted by the message that had just appeared on her phone from Sam.

  Sarah’s court date has been set for January 10th, thought you might like to know.

  Although she had pleaded guilty, and Olivia didn’t have to go, she knew that she needed to, that she needed to face her. Sarah’s solicitor was putting in a plea of insanity or something akin to that, and Olivia worried that she may walk away free, despite assurances from her own solicitors that this wouldn’t happen. January was going to be one hell of a month. Until it was over though Olivia felt stuck, like she couldn’t move on, couldn’t make any decisions while her head was so full. It really was a case of one day, one flight, at a time.

  Chapter 62

  ‘Are you sure you’re up to this?’ asked Claire. She was looking at Olivia seriously.

  ‘Honestly, I’m fine, I can’t take any more time off.’

  Olivia closed her case and locked it. Despite the bruises that were now turning yellow beneath her uniform, she needed to get away. Being here was torturous, waiting to hear updates and going over and over things in her mind. There was also the money situation; she knew that she needed to start planning for her future, and even if she stayed with Claire for months she couldn’t expect to live there for free. Whilst she would still get her basic salary if she went sick again, it wasn’t very much, and like most crew she needed the extra money she got for each flight she operated. It hadn’t mattered when she was with Tom, but now that she was supporting herself she needed every penny.

  ‘Well let’s go and get some sunshine then,’ declared Claire, walking towards the door.

  Olivia followed, pulling her case which felt light with its contents of summer clothes.

  As they walked across the road to the car Olivia shivered, and wondered whether the wind had actually just picked up or whether it was her memory reminding her of that night. She opened the passenger door of Claire’s car quickly, accepting her friend’s help and letting her take her case to lift into the boot. The pain was bearable, and she wouldn’t let it affect her work, but she was still grateful for the gesture. She wondered who the manager would be, and whether she would be able to mention her injuries, or whether she would have to keep a brave face on all flight lest she was berated for coming to work when she wasn’t truly fit.

  The display on the dashboard read eight degrees centigrade, and thick grey clouds blanketed the sky above them as they drove to the airport. She had been unable to lift herself from feeling as miserable as this day was for so long now, and hoped that the sunshine in St. Lucia would be enough to give her the break that she so needed.

  ‘You’ll all be getting an hour and a half crew rest,’ Camilla paused and looked around at the mute crew, ‘on the bus from the airport to the hotel.’ She laughed, thinking that she had just made a joke, but no one else seemed to find the funny side. It was early, and the flight was nine hours long, so to hear that they weren’t going to get any rest until they had landed just wasn’t funny. It was lost on Camilla though, as she continued to deliver the briefing, completely unaware that the crew were not laughing and contributing as they did with other managers, only knowing what was normal for her flights and having nothing to compare them to, thinking that her way was the best way.

  Camilla Thomas was possibly the most dreaded of all the managers, and Olivia had momentarily considered calling in sick at the last minute when she had seen her name on the crew list at check-in. It would have been so easy to run to the manager on duty and explain to them what had happened, cry a few of the tears that were so readily available lately, and get sent home, but she didn’t. It was just a flight, she told herself, and she needed the two nights away. Anyway, after what she had been through lately she could handle Camilla. As she looked at the faces of the newer, younger girls and boys, she just hoped that they would be ok.

  Olivia could see that Gemma was trying not to cry as she pulled her drinks cart back into the rear galley.

  ‘Don’t let her get to you, hun, she’s just bitter and twisted,’ Olivia said kindly, taking the cart from her and stowing it.

  ‘She just shouted at me in front of the passengers.’ Her voice wobbled.

  Olivia shook her head.

  ‘Honestly, I really don’t know what her problem is, or how she’s still here, she’s been like this as long as I’ve known her. Please don’t take it personally, she’s always like it, hon, don’t let her bring you down.’ It was true, Camilla was notorious. She had been at the company for over twenty years and had forged herself a reputation as one mean lady. Apparently her peers remembered her as being quite sweet in the early days, but something had happened and she had grown bitter and twisted. It was her way to pick on the younger, more beautiful crew, and she wouldn’t leave it until she had broken them. Olivia felt protective, almost maternal for this poor girl who hung her head and turned away, probably to hide the tears.

  As Olivia prepared the carts for the meal service she wondered which of the many rumours were true about why Camilla had turned so mean. Was it the cheating ex, or the traumatic event…? She looked at the poor girl and felt angry; it didn’t matter what had happened, there was no excuse. Nothing gave you the excuse to be horrible to people, to be mean, to hurt them. She rubbed the ribs that were still bruised and tried to calm herself.

  ‘She’s something else,’ said Claire under her breath as she walked in the galley. ‘She’s just told a poor young lad off who got up to use the toilet. Poor thing was terrified, he didn’t notice the seatbelt signs. His parents are fuming.’

  Olivia shook her head, about to reply when Camilla walked into the galley. She was small and wizened, too thin, her face lined and aged with meanness, greying dark hair pulled back too tightly.

  ‘Can we speed things up, girls? This service is taking a very long time.’

  ‘What’s the rush, Camilla? It’s not like we are getting breaks so we may as well take our time and not hurry things.’ Olivia wondered who had said it, and then realised it was herself; the thoughts that had been in her mind had just rolled off her tongue. She saw the look on Camilla’s face, and rushed to find something to say first, to limit the damage. ‘It’s ok, Camilla.’ She forced a smile. ‘All of our passengers are very happy, we’ll be out in just a minute.
Gemma’s just cleared in all of the rubbish and checked the toilets.’ She could see Camilla trying to think of something to say back, but not finding anything to argue.

  ‘Very well, I’m going back up to first class if you need me.’

  ‘Oh, we’re fine thank you, everything in hand down here,’ Olivia called behind her as she left, still with the fake smile fixed to her face as she stuck up her middle finger, and carried on loading the meals from the ovens into boxes. Nothing more needed to be said, but the tension in the air was replaced with suppressed giggles as they all worked.

  Chapter 63

  The crew sat at the back of the coach carrying them from the airport to their hotel in Rodney Bay. It wouldn’t have taken long to cover the distance on a motorway but as the aged vehicle crawled up the steep hills and drove slowly around the twists and turns of the narrow roads, the lush greenery and glimpses of the Caribbean Sea passed them slowly. Those on the crew who were familiar with this route had brought drinks for the journey, to make it go quicker, and they chatted merrily as they topped up their glasses. Even Camilla joined them, still oblivious to how they felt about her, thankfully seating herself next to the captain who was therefore forced to spend the journey talking to her. She seemed to lighten up though, Olivia observed, after a glass of bubbly. Perhaps the old her was still in there somewhere beneath the hard shell she had created for herself.

  They howled with laughter at the game of charades that they were playing, and Olivia felt the warmth inside her, not from the sun that shone brightly in the sky, but from her love of these moments that she never took for granted. She looked around at the bunch of people who had mostly been strangers that morning, laughing like old friends on holiday. No one else outside of this job got to have these times and she felt truly blessed.

  They drove slowly in the traffic through the town, marvelling at the cruise ships floating in the bay, looking so huge compared to the small buildings nestled in the hills behind them, and turned left into the road that led to their destination. They started to put their belongings away, gathering up the empty bottles and cans that lay around. As they drove into the hotel the view through the lobby out to the sea had never been so beautiful.

  The thought hadn’t crossed her mind until she stood in front of the bathroom mirror applying her sun cream the next morning. Her bikini failed completely to cover any of the bruises and she felt shaken and vulnerable again as she was reminded of what had happened. The mottled yellow and grey patches spread from her left shoulder all the way down to the bottom of her ribs, starting again on her hip and thigh. Apparently this was the side on which she had landed, the doctors had concluded, commenting that she had been lucky in some ways that the trauma to her head lay covered by her hair. Olivia was grateful for this, that her face had been spared, not because of vanity, but because she could cover the rest and to the outside world she didn’t look like a victim. There were other, smaller bruises on the other side, probably from where the car had struck her.

  She saw the sympathy in Claire’s eyes as she stood in front of her.

  ‘I can’t go to the beach like this.’ It had all been ok the day before, it had been dusk by the time they had arrived and she had quickly changed into her loose trousers and t-shirt. They had enjoyed happy hour at the bar and she had fallen into bed, not noticing the pain from the bruises anymore, so familiar with it now that it was almost normal. Now though, she was back in her reality again, and she resented that it was even managing to follow her here, tainting her enjoyment, not letting her forget. She saw her friend, ever the solution finder, think for a moment for a way to resolve it.

  ‘I know. We’ll find ourselves a couple of loungers at the end of the beach away from everyone. No one will notice that in your sundress, just take it off when you lay down.’ Olivia knew this was the only option, there was no way she wanted to undress in front of the rest of them, knowing that they would all be shocked and feel awkward, not wanting to ask. She didn’t want to talk about it, explain the whole awful situation to so many people.

  ‘Oh my heavens, Olivia?’

  Olivia had been enjoying the heat from the sun on her skin, listening to the waves and the rustling of the palm trees as the breeze blew their leaves. She had heard the light footsteps in the sand, and felt someone stand over her, but had resisted opening her eyes, hoping it was just a member of hotel staff and that they would just go away. Camilla’s voice was like nails scratching a blackboard, making her wince before taking a deep breath and opening her eyes. ‘What on earth happened to you?’ Camilla looked shocked, but her tone was one that Olivia hadn’t heard her use before, compassionate.

  Claire had already sat up, and appeared ready to ask Camilla to leave, but Olivia looked at her with a smile that said it was ok and sat herself up slowly.

  ‘It’s not as bad as it looks, Camilla. I got hit by a car, that’s all.’

  ‘But darling you surely shouldn’t be at work like that, you must still be in pain?’

  Olivia gave in; she had been deluded to think she could avoid the subject for the whole of her trip, and she found herself telling this person who had been so frosty before, the whole sorry tale. Camilla just listened, never losing the look of sympathy, and nodding in understanding when Olivia justified why she had come to work.

  ‘I wish you had said, we could have made sure you worked an easier position.’ Olivia didn’t like to tell her that her demeanour had not suggested a sympathetic ear.

  Camilla looked like she might cry and to Olivia and Claire’s astonishment proceeded to tell them about how she too had once been covered in bruises, at the hands of a man who had controlled her. She had been trapped for years in an abusive relationship from which she had finally found the courage to leave, but which she never felt truly free from. Olivia wondered if she often opened up, suspecting that she didn’t.

  Once again Olivia felt stronger when she got back from the flight to Claire’s two days later. The sun had tanned her skin, and the bruises had almost gone. She felt almost like her old self, and she had a newfound resolve to take control of her life. Camilla had shown her what happens to those people who allow themselves to be eaten up by events, unable to put them in a box, in their memories, letting it twist them, but Olivia was good at storing memories away when she really needed to. She knew she would have to face the trial, and that she would need to face up to life without Tom in it, but she could start again, and she would.

  Chapter 64

  ‘You can just stay here, let’s get all of this over with and then you can think more clearly about what you want to do,’ said Claire.

  A week had passed since they had got back from St. Lucia, and a quick flight to Boston had come and gone, just like Olivia’s bruises. She still missed Tom terribly but there was no way that she could go back, despite his daily pleas, when all she could think about was Sarah and the upcoming trial. She felt like she needed to take back some control and so was trying to make her plan for the future, mindlessly scrolling through pictures of flats for rent. She had always known she was fortunate to live the lifestyle Tom had given her, and her heart sank as she looked at the small places that she could only just afford on her own. With no savings and a mediocre income it was unlikely she would ever be able to buy anywhere around here, and she wondered if it would be as unbearable as she thought to move back home where prices were much cheaper. Just weeks ago her future had been so certain and now she felt scared at having to start again.

  ‘Thank you,’ she said gratefully, she would much rather stay here with Claire than start again just now. Maybe when she had a clear mind she would be able to find a solution. The door buzzer rang and Claire walked away to answer it, returning moments later with a concerned look on her face.

  ‘It’s Tom, he’s at the door.’

  Olivia hadn’t returned his calls or answered his messages for days, she had become numb to his words, but she felt panicked for a moment, wondering if she was strong enough to see him. She go
t up slowly, and walked tentatively to the front door where he stood with his head hung.

  ‘Hi.’ Tom sounded nervous as he looked up at her. ‘I’m so sorry to just turn up but I needed to see you.’

  ‘What do you want, Tom?’ She didn’t say it harshly, she couldn’t be unkind to someone who looked so sorry.

  ‘I don’t know, I just needed to see you. I miss you so much.’ He rubbed his face and looked up, blinking away the tears. ‘Can I take you out somewhere? Will you come for a coffee, or dinner? Anything you want, but will you just come and be with me for a little while?’

  ‘I can’t, Tom.’ Olivia could feel her voice faltering, and her lips trembled as she felt the emotion overwhelm her. The tears came and she didn’t even wipe them away, and for a moment they stood and looked at each other in mutual despair. Olivia so wanted to fall into his arms, for him to hold her and make her feel better, but he was the one who had caused this so he couldn’t fix it.

  ‘I don’t know what to do without you. Please tell me what I can do to make you come back?’

  Olivia pictured their home, how happy she had been there, and then she pictured Sarah in it.

  ‘I can never come back to the house, Tom, not after she was there.’ Silence prevailed for a moment. ‘It’s over, Tom.’

  Olivia wondered if she had actually just said those three words out loud, knowing that she had when she saw the glimmer of hope in his eyes go out. She moved to close the door.

  ‘I’ll sell the house, we can start afresh somewhere,’ he said in desperation.

  For a moment Olivia saw a solution to one of the hurdles, but it was just one of many, and not enough.

  ‘I’ll always love you, Tom, but I can’t do this. I need to move on, I need to make a fresh start.’

  Tom just nodded, standing steadfastly as Olivia closed the door. She wondered if he heard her sobs as she sank to the floor, and the gentle tones of her friend consoling her, picking her up and leading her away. She wondered if he felt the grief so deeply, suspecting that he did, that he was suffering as much as her.