“We have about thirty minutes until we meet them for dinner,” Brain said as he pulled out of the lot. “Enough time to get you settled in and walk back.”
“She was too young, when we dated before. We’ve never…” McGyver sighed. “I haven’t been nervous about having sex with someone in so long, I…” he sighed again. “This isn’t the way I’d have set things up. Our first time should’ve just been something that happened, and this feels scripted.”
“Then script the fuck out of it.”
“What do you mean?”
“Stop in the gift shop and buy some massage oil, or start a game of strip poker, or just tease her until she’s ready to beg for relief before you give her what she wants. Whatever works, but you get to write the script, so do it on your terms.”
McGyver blew out a breath. “Yeah. She hasn’t been terribly active on social media until recently, but others were, and it looks like she’s been with more than her share of rich playboys. Royalty, too. She was in the gossip rags for a while when she had a thing going with the crown prince of an eastern European damned country. The only thing we have in common is a few months together in high school, but I swear I don’t think this is about going against her daddy this time.”
“Was it before?”
“I’m pretty sure it started out that way, but it turned into more. She used to say I saw her, when everyone else only saw her name, or her clothes, or who she was supposed to be.”
“And do you still see her, or the person she’s expected to be?”
“You know the answer to that. The wolf is only ever going to see the person, and the human’s never given a flying fuck about society’s stupid rules. I follow them when it’s smart to, but not because I respect them.”
“Then make sure she knows you still see her, and not the outer trappings. Her mother was listed as one of the most beautiful people in the world, year after year, and I think Iris is even more striking. She’s used to people admiring her beauty.”
“Yeah. The club survived the media spotlight when Hailey became Suli, so we can survive if it comes out she’s dating a biker, right?”
Brain pulled into a parking spot in front of a nice cabin and turned the engine off. “We’ll figure it out, brother. Her dad could cause problems for us, no doubt about it, but we’ll deal with whatever happens. There isn’t a doubt in my mind she’s yours, and that means she’s ours.” He shrugged. “The ol’ladies have already accepted her. It’s possible you’re just along for the ride at this point.”
Harmony told Iris their men had already passed through the hallway heading to the on-site restaurant, and sure enough, the maître d’ walked them straight to the back of the restaurant, where the men were already seated. Harmony was a wolf too, and it seemed their sense of smell was, indeed, damned good.
Both men stood and gave them a proper greeting. Iris had preordered the wine she wanted, and it was brought out while the foursome took their seats.
They couldn’t talk until the production of opening and pouring the wine was over, and then the women told the men about all the pampering they’d had so far. The next day it was facials, a full body exfoliation, mud baths, and yet another massage. The men were going to hike to a nearby mountaintop. At first, she’d thought they meant to do it as wolves, but she’d been informed they couldn’t do that in areas with a lot of hikers, and especially not in daylight.
Dinner was exquisite, and the conversation was relaxed and comfortable.
And real.
Iris was used to fancy dinners with the social elite, but not with friends. She’d been friendly with people and thought it was the same, but it wasn’t.
There was no small talk. No pat phrases. No one-upping each other.
As dinner ended, Danny arranged for two slices of blueberry cheesecake to be sent to their room in a few hours, and she rolled her eyes at him, but couldn’t help her grin. He knew how to make her happy.
McGyver considered Brain’s advice from every direction, and realized he needed more information from his Iris before they had sex.
Too many times, he’d scented fear off her when it didn’t make sense. Someone had hurt his Blueberry and he needed details.
The resort boasted online about having their own herb garden, which was how they made their oils and candles and such, as well as the seasonings in their restaurant. Online, one could see a large atrium area with an artificial waterfall and planting areas, so he told her he wanted to walk their dinner off a little before they headed to the room.
They sat on a bench about fifteen yards from the waterfall, and it felt like a warm spring evening, despite the chilly air outside.
“A couple of times,” he told her, “you’ve smelled of fear when arousal would’ve made more sense. I want to take you to our cabin and ravish you until you no longer know your name, but I need to understand the fear before I can do that.”
Iris shook her head and looked away, and he smelled grief, followed by anger, and then pure desolation.
She folded her arms around herself and bowed her shoulders in. “I complain about people seeing who they want me to be, without really seeing me. They see my money and my name, and never understand who I am on the inside, but it’s possible I’ve done the same to others. I mean, I’ve never felt like I was in love with anyone, not like I was with you, but I’ve liked them enough so we kind of accidentally fell into something that looked like a relationship, and one of those times…”
She shuddered and hunched over further. “The law doesn’t apply to him. He’s…” She shook her head. “I broke up with him in person, when no one else was around. I didn’t need my security because his security was so intense, but they would never step in and stop him from…” She squeezed her eyes closed. “It was my fault. I was stupid. I haven’t been stupid since.”
If he hadn’t done so much digging into her past, he might not have understood.
“Here’s what I think,” he told her. “You became a playgirl, once you got to college and had some freedom. You rebelled against daddy and did the sex, drugs, and rock-n-roll thing, except it was society people instead of rock stars. A prince fell for you and wanted to make you his princess, which probably sounded like a good idea at first, but then you freaked and tried to back out, and he raped you.”
“How do you know?” It was barely a whisper, and he heard the sentiment more than the words.
“Just putting pieces together. You haven’t been in the gossip rags much since the two of you stopped being a thing.”
“I haven’t had sex since he…” She finally met his gaze. “But before him, if you’ve gone back and read, then you know there were scandals. Daddy tried to cover them up and have legitimate reasons for me to be out of the spotlight when the rags said I was in rehab, but…” She shuddered and curled into herself again. “I was out of control. I was a mess. If you don’t want me, I’ll understand. I’m damaged goods, Danny. I try to pretend I’m not, but…”
A sob tore from her throat, and he was glad the sound of the waterfall gave them some privacy. He didn’t smell anyone close, thank goodness.
“I don’t give a flying fuck what you’ve done, Blueberry. Once you get used to me, I’m going to want to get downright nasty behind closed doors, so whatever you’ve learned will work in your favor.” He caught her chin and forced eye contact. “You are my Blueberry. There’s nothing you can tell me that will make me think you’re dirty or naughty or damaged goods. You let two men fuck you? Three? Fine. Whatever. I hope you had explosive orgasms.”
And the prince was going to pay for hurting her, but Iris didn’t need to know that until it was done. He had no idea how he’d do it, but he’d find a way.
He pulled her to him and cradled her head to his chest. “What did he do to you? Did he rape you? Slap you? Punch you?”
She spoke so softly, he needed a little extra help from his wolf to hear her. “He nearly killed me. Punched, kicked. It was awful. And then he choked me while he
was raping me. His security must’ve only been under orders to keep him from killing someone, because they didn’t stop him until I was nearly dead. We’d been on his yacht. Just the two of us, and we got in a fight, and I realized I was done with him, so I broke up with him. Bad timing, but I’d had no idea he’d…”
She stood, took a few steps away from him, and faced the waterfall as she spoke. He’d have never been able to hear her without his wolf.
“That was my last stint in rehab. Mostly, they took me because I needed medical treatment and a place to heal. He broke my jaw, and it had to be wired shut. A few ribs were broken, my face was a mess, and my right knee was screwed up. The high dollar rehab places know how to keep a secret, so they patched me up and gave me time to heal, and the bonus was that I got clean. Again.”
She turned to face him, and her expression was so sad, it broke his heart. “I’m not an addict. I can drink, and I can smoke weed, without worry of going off the deep end. I can even do blow here and there, so long as I don’t do it more than once every four or five days. If I get on the cycle of one drug to keep me going during the day and different drugs to bring me down and let me sleep, I need rehab to get clean. I haven’t done anything stronger than weed in a while, though. I mostly only did the strong stuff when I partied, and I’ve had my nose to the grindstone since school started in the fall.”
“Is cocaine the strongest thing you’ve done?”
She shook her head. “I’ve been clean nearly a year this time. I mean, I’ve done a little blow at a party a few times, and I’ve smoked pot plenty, and you know I drink when I’m away from campus, but...” she shrugged. “I haven’t done anything stronger than alcohol since school started back, and since I can’t have wine in my apartment, I haven’t even drank as much as I normally would. I like to have a glass of wine at night to help me sleep, but I couldn’t risk getting caught with it in student housing.”
“I know you’re clean. Completely clean. My wolf would smell anything still affecting your metabolism, and sometimes even after someone thinks they’re clean, he can pick up on it.” He stood and walked to her — slowly, so he wouldn’t scare her. The wolf was on board with making sure she felt safe and secure. He wanted to claim her even worse than the man, but he wouldn’t scare her.
He touched her shoulders first, and gently pulled her into his embrace. “We’ll go slow. We have two nights, and nothing says we need to have sex this weekend. Lots of kissing and touch, and we’ll see where things go. I’m most looking forward to sleeping in the same bed with you and waking beside you. The sex will happen in its own time.”
She shook her head, and he scented… embarrassment? Not quite shame, but perhaps not far from it.
“My first sexual experience was good, but then, for about a year, it was awful and I almost gave up on it. It was boring and awful and it gave me the heebie-jeebies. Then I had sex with an asshole who was rough with me, and I had so many orgasms I thought I might die. I learned that only the assholes can give me orgasms.” She took a breath and blew it out. “You can’t be gentle with me. It won’t work. That’s why I haven’t jumped back in the saddle again, because nice sex doesn’t do anything for me, but I can’t trust assholes.”
“I love that you know what you want and can express your needs.” He pulled back enough for eye contact. “We’ll figure it out, Blueberry. I promise. You’re the perfect woman for me in every damned way imaginable, and now I find out you prefer down and dirty rough sex? It’s all gonna work out. We’ll figure out a way over the initial hump, and we’re going to have so much damned fun together.”
Chapter 13
Iris wasn’t sure what to think. Danny hadn’t seemed disgusted, and she’d always thought anyone who’d still want her if they knew the truth probably wouldn’t be worth having.
But he was a biker, and they had a reputation for sex and drugs… except Danny told her they didn’t deal drugs and they didn’t allow the drug dealers to peddle them in the RTMC territory. He’d also said his wolf would smell them on her if she wasn’t clean, so it’s possible they didn’t do drugs because they were werewolves. They raised their own cattle so they’d have beef without antibiotics or hormones, so it made sense they wouldn’t put drugs straight into their bodies.
He’d insisted it was too cold for her to walk to the cabin, and that he already knew how to get to it, so he was driving her car. “Technically,” she warned, “it’s in Daddy’s name, and he didn’t give you permission to drive it, so if you wreck it, he’ll probably file charges saying you stole it.”
“Back roads. Just a few miles. We’ll be fine.”
“I’m a good driver.”
“I know. I looked up your driving record. One wreck, and it wasn’t your fault. And with the levels of security you’re under, I’m guessing you’ve been sent to some high dollar driving courses designed to teach you to evade someone trying to chase you. I’m guessing you’re a damned good driver.”
“You know more about me than you should.”
“Since you came back into my life, I’ve made it my business to know everything I can, Blueberry.” He sighed. “And I realize that sounds creepy, but I don’t really give a shit. You want me out of your life, say the word and I’m gone, but as long as I’m welcome in it, I need to be able to help keep you safe.”
“Is that a wolf thing?”
“Partly. Honestly, I’m not sure how much of it’s who I’d be without the wolf, since I’ve had him with me since puberty. It’s possible I’d still feel the same if I were completely human, but maybe not.” He blew out a breath. “Awkward question, but do you need to talk to Kenny? I mean, we may not have sex, but if we do, and if it gets rough…” He turned off the road onto a one-lane driveway, and the headlights showed only the next curve with forest all around them. “Do you need to warn him off, so he doesn’t come barging in? I don’t know what your protocol is, but…”
Iris’s insides heated at the possibilities, her clit came to life in her panties, and she tried to breathe through the burst of hunger and need she felt. She’d been thoroughly pampered for hours before dinner, and she’d been totally chilled, but now, her nervous system practically buzzed.
“I’ve already told them to stay out. He insisted on giving me a safeword, and he told me if he scents true distress, he’ll come in whether I say it or not.”
He pulled into a parking space and put the car in park but didn’t turn it off. “Have you ever played with a safeword before?”
“Yeah, but that isn’t really my thing. I mean, I understand the concept, but it made it seem…” She shrugged. She didn’t want to talk about this, but knew Danny wasn’t going to let it drop. “Artificial? I don’t know how to explain it. I just wanted to fuck, back then. When I was high, the two just went together, you know? Blow and orgasms.” Another shrug, because she didn’t want to say it again, but she wasn’t sure he’d fully understood when she explained before. “I did outrageous things in search of the best orgasm possible. The highest of highs. Those moments of bliss you get right at the peak. I’m not your pure and innocent Blueberry anymore. Not by a long shot.”
He turned in his seat and she saw frustration reflected in his eyes, but not disgust.
“I have no idea how many women I’ve fucked. Four hundred, maybe? No, that’s way too low. I’m reasonably sure it’s less than two thousand, and certain it’s more than six hundred. Werewolves can’t catch diseases, so I was bare most of the time I was in their throats or asses. I always cover up when I’m in a pussy though — don’t want little werewolf babies running around. My point is that I’m not pure and innocent either. We’ve both gone out into the world and had our experiences, and now we’re here, just the two of us, finally getting the opportunity to experience each other.”
He stroked her cheek. “Whether you’ve been with fifty men or a few thousand men doesn’t matter, so long as you’re healthy. I can’t catch anything, but I need you to live a long, healthy life.”
How many men had she been with? She had no idea, either. It was probably less than his six hundred minimum, though.
“Two thousand? Really?”
He shrugged. “I’ve been sexually active ten years. Figure two hundred a year, you get two thousand, and I’m pretty sure I did NOT hit that many, so that’s my upper limit. If I took the time to do the math...” He growled. “Is this really important?”
She laughed. “No, it doesn’t seem to be. I mean, knowing you can’t catch diseases means it isn’t at all important. I wasn’t always as careful about condom use as I should’ve been, but I was tested regularly, and never caught anything a few rounds of antibiotics wouldn’t get rid of. My IUD is still in and active, so I can’t get pregnant. This one lasts five years, and I got it when I was twenty-two.” She shook her head. “The point is, I can’t get pregnant, and I don’t have much of a period. Can we go in?”
He turned the ignition off and opened the door. Her keys were still in her purse, so no need to give them back. With the push button ignition, he hadn’t had to wrestle them from her — he’d just needed to get to the driver’s side first.
But she’d let him drive. She had options. She could’ve refused to get in the passenger seat, or she could’ve asked her security to remove him, but she didn’t want to do either. She’d secretly kind of liked the fact he wanted to drive her.
But she couldn’t let him do it again. It was too risky.
“Sit still, so I can open your door.” He was out and around the car wolf fast, which told her both members of her security team knew about him. It didn’t mean they were both werewolves, but she thought it upped the chances.
She’d seen their vehicle parked in the woods when they’d neared the cabin. Were the guards in it, or would they be in the woods all night? She didn’t know. What must it be like to have to sit in the woods, alert, six hours at a time? Sometimes, her teams worked twelve-hour shifts when she was out of town, other times they preferred to swap out every six hours. This weekend, they were rotating on the shorter schedule.
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