Healing Hearts 8: Teach Me What Love Is

by Dixie Lynn Dwyer

  Now her mind was on Rocky and the fact that he didn’t tell her he had a kid, was once involved with Hailey and that he obviously was still involved in their lives. He was probably like forty, older and sure, shit happens, but as they talked about many things this last week she’d have thought he would have mentioned a kid. It made her wonder what other secrets they had, and whether he still had feelings for Hailey. She was jealous, very, very jealous and meanwhile she hadn’t shared everything about herself either or about Andrew and the attack. Not to mention being a virgin, and that was going to come up soon.

  How could she tell them? They were obviously way more experienced than she was and there was an ex, probably many and a kid, too? Jesus, what was she doing? Was she looking for a father figure in her life because she really didn’t have one? Was she searching for some knight in shining armor that would make all the bad things disappear? She was at her wits’ end. She was tired, in a lot of pain and needed that bath and maybe vodka instead of wine tonight.

  As she grabbed her things and started to say good-bye to Peter and his mom, who would be released shortly to other family assisting them, one of the nurses came in.

  “Faith, there’s a really good-looking guy out here asking for you. Says the name is Hendrick.”

  She nodded. “Thanks.”

  She said goodnight and then walked out of the room. Hendrick stood there, no longer in his uniform but in jeans and a T-shirt with his bulging muscles and tattoos, and she couldn’t help but to feel aroused.

  “You look exhausted,” he said and reached for her bags.

  “You didn’t have to come,” she whispered, feeling hurt still by seeing Rocky with Brianna and then hugging Hailey. Her insecurities and scars from the past were making her have bad thoughts and thinking these men couldn’t be trusted. Her head was pounding and it bordered on becoming a migraine.

  “Paulie and Rocky are in the truck. One of them will drive your car back to your place and we’ll follow.” He went to place his arm around her and she stepped forward and gasped.

  “Shit, did you get your back checked out?”

  “I iced it. It’s ugly and hurts a lot.”

  “Fuck,” he whispered.

  She turned toward him as they entered the elevator. She held his gaze and she leaned her head back. “You didn’t need to come.”

  “Yes, we all did because we care about you.” She looked away from him and rubbed her temples.

  “Headache?”

  “Migraine.”

  “We’ll get you home in no time and help you to relax,” he said and looked her over. The elevator doors opened and they exited. She was really feeling the exhaustion and everything hurt, never mind the ache in her heart. She felt like she didn’t even have the energy to converse with them, to listen to any lies, or any information on Brianna and Hailey. She was spent. She gave her all and then some and she was on empty.

  When they headed outside she saw Paulie and Rocky standing by the truck. Paulie went to pull her into his arms but she pressed her hand against his chest.

  “Hey, we’ve been worried about you and about what happened.”

  “Everything hurts. I have a migraine, too. Just need to get home,” she said, squinting her eyes.

  “Let’s get her into the truck,” Rocky said and Paulie lifted her up and placed her onto the seat. She slid along it and right next to Rocky, who was driving. She didn’t look at him and sat forward, with her hands against her face and leaned on her elbows.

  “Sit back, sweetie,” Hendrick said to her.

  “Can’t. It hurts too much,” she said and then moaned.

  “Did they look at your back at all?” Rocky asked.

  “What do you think?” she snapped at him.

  “Damn it, Faith, we need to talk. You’re pissed at me and there’s no need to be.”

  “Really? Hmm.”

  “Hailey is Brianna’s mother. We had a brother, Keith, and Brianna is his daughter.”

  She looked at him, her head hurting so badly she started to feel sick to her stomach. Her vision blurred.

  “Brother?”

  “Keith died five years ago. He was drunk, crashed his car and was killed. We didn’t even know Hailey was pregnant and then she tells us at his funeral. She was a mess and in love with him but the jackass had an addiction to alcohol. I couldn’t save him. I had no idea.”

  “It wasn’t your fault, Rocky. We didn’t know either,” Paulie said to him.

  “You guys were still active duty. You were getting ready to settle into civilian life. I was out of the military and should have noticed the changes in him.”

  “He was a grown man. He’s gone and there isn’t anything we can do to bring him back. But we can help to make sure our niece and Hailey are okay,” Hendrick said.

  Now Faith felt like shit. She reached over and placed her hand on Rocky’s thigh. “I’m sorry I thought the worst and assumed you were cheating and that Brianna was your daughter. Not that it would have bothered me if she was your daughter, it was the cheating part. Ahh…forget it. It hurts to think, my headache is so bad right now.”

  Rocky covered her hand with his and then told her to lay her head on his lap and her back wouldn’t hit the seat. She did as he stopped the truck by the school parking lot.

  “Keys, sweetie?” Hendrick asked.

  “Purse, inside right pocket.”

  She heard the door open and then close then Hendrick’s palm on her thigh, caressing it. “We’ll take good care of you, Faith,” Hendrick said and just as she started to focus on being calm and relaxed, and inhaling their cologne, the truck stopped again. She didn’t want to move.

  “We’re here, at your place,” Rocky said to her and caressed her hair.

  “I’ll stay right here.” They both chuckled and then she heard her car and the lights illuminated the side of the truck because the door was opened.

  “I’ll carry you. Come on. You’ll feel better after a nice bath, some relaxing clothes and—”

  “Vodka,” she said and Hendrick laughed.

  She eased up from Rocky’s lap and winced. Hendrick pulled her to the edge of the seat and then lifted her up into his arms. She laid her head against his chest and he carried her into her house. Paulie had already opened the door and when they went inside and started turning on lights, she moaned.

  “Dark room, painkillers.”

  “Food, painkillers, hot bath, and bed,” Rocky said and that’s when she smelled something delicious. She lifted her head and saw the wrapped sandwiches.

  “Is that a cheesesteak sandwich from Gordon’s?” she asked. Paulie chuckled.

  “So Brook was right. She said you eat these as a cheat food,” Rocky said and Hendrick placed her down on the stool by the island. Rocky opened her refrigerator and got her a water bottle.

  “Ibuprofen?” Rocky asked, looking in cabinets.

  “Left cabinet by the sink,” she said and Hendrick started to unwrap her sandwich. “Oh, hands. I need to wash them.”

  “Don’t move,” Paulie said and then went to the sink and grabbed paper towels, ran them under water, added soap and then brought them to her. She used them to wash her hands and he handed her dry ones.

  “You’re spoiling me.”

  “You deserve better. What happened today was upsetting, to say the least,” Rocky said firmly as he leaned against the counter, arms crossed. Hendrick moved the two pills toward her that Rocky placed down by her water. She took them, held his gaze and then began to eat. Just a few bites she got past the nausea and then took a few more. She ate half and then drank more water.

  “Better?” Paulie asked.

  She nodded. “I’ll save this for another day,” she said. Paulie wrapped it up good and placed it into her refrigerator and then Hendrick lifted her up into his arms.

  “What are you doing?”

  “Getting you ready for shower, bath, whatever and bed, but first we check out the injuries.”

  “Hendrick.”
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  “No arguing. We touched on rules last week. We’re in charge. Your safety, your well-being is our priority.” He set her feet down on the rug and turned her around to face the bed.

  She felt the zipper come down on the back of her dress.

  “Bath or shower?” Paulie asked, standing by her bathroom door.

  “Shower is faster,” she said to him.

  “Mother fucker,” Rocky said and Hendrick’s hands stilled, then she felt his lips press against her lower back.

  “Jesus, baby, what the fuck did that asshole do?” Paulie asked.

  “Slammed me into the metal door. Right against the long push bar. I wasn’t letting him get to Peter. No way,” she said and she felt the tears in her eyes.

  Rocky clenched her chin. “He is lucky that you’re his teacher and that you paid attention.”

  “He’s just a child. I found out at the hospital that his stepdad was being abusive for a while. He threatened to hurt Peter’s mom and that’s why he stayed silent and didn’t tell me or anyone else. I saw it in his eyes, Hendrick,” she said to him.

  “Too many kids aren’t lucky enough to get saved. Some survive, the scars and bruises heal, but the pain lasts forever,” Hendrick told her. She squinted at him.

  “You sound like you understand. You’ve seen this type of thing with work?”

  He was silent and then pressed his lips to her shoulder, slid his palm along her ass.

  “We were schooled with a belt to our backs. Learned respect, discipline, and fear at the hands of a man who should have been a protector,” he whispered and she was shocked as tears spilled from her eyes, and she turned and hugged him, despite the pain. She tilted up and kissed his neck. He slid her dress off of her and she let it fall.

  “You’re an angel, Faith. Our angel,” Rocky said to her and caressed her hair. Paulie moved close to her, too. He kissed her shoulders and undid her bra.

  “I’ll start the shower,” he said and Hendrick pulled back and helped her get completely undressed.

  “Mother fucker. Glad that dick is behind bars. Hope he stays there,” Rocky said with his hands on her hips, stroking her hip bones.

  Rocky kissed her neck and pressed up against her. “Shower and then we’ll tuck you in,” he said and his words were filled with promises. Her heart raced and she felt needy, and then a bit guilty. She had made assumptions about them and they were wrong. They hadn’t lied to her that she knew of, and she truly believed that they wouldn’t. She would have to tell them about never having sex, and maybe she wouldn’t have to tell them how bad things actually were with Andrew. They would freak out if they knew he texted this week. She didn’t want them thinking she had baggage. Tonight was enough and she knew they worried about her safety and what she did to protect Peter. She didn’t want them to know about being a victim. They had experienced true abuse as children and she sustained one beating from a man she thought she loved and nearly gave her body and soul, too. There was no need to tell them. It was too embarrassing to reveal such weakness.

  She walked into the bathroom and Paulie watched her step into the shower. She was careful not to wet her hair. She didn’t think she had the strength to wash it anyway or to lift her arms.

  “You okay?” he asked.

  “I’m so tired, but I think the painkillers are kicking in. My head feels numb.”

  “Well, your bed is waiting for you, along with me and my brothers,” Paulie told her.

  She washed up best she could, and then rinsed and turned off the water. Paulie was there with a towel to wrap her up in. She laid her head against his chest as he dried her off. “I’m so tired. Emotionally drained.”

  “I know, sweetie. We’re not going anywhere. We’ll stay the night,” he whispered and her heart really began to pound. Could she let them? Would it be enough to just hold her or would they want more? Would they want to have sex? Did she want to have sex for the first time with three men? Suddenly holding on to her virginity for so many years seemed stupid to her. She didn’t have thoughts of this being a mistake with them or suffering a broken heart when they left her, or got angry and struck her. Oh God.

  When they entered the bedroom Rocky and Hendrick had their shirts off. She had palpitations. “Oh God, you’re gorgeous,” she whispered. Their expressions were hard, serious.

  “You’re the gorgeous one,” Paulie told her and laid her on the bed, discarded the towel and knelt one knee between her legs as he loomed over her. She didn’t even care about the pain in her back. She felt numb right now and lost in Paulie’s dark blue eyes. He trailed a finger along her breast, making the nipple harden. She inhaled.

  The bed dipped and Rocky now stood beside Paulie as Hendrick leaned along the mattress next to her. She glanced at him and then back at Rocky and Paulie.

  “We aren’t going anywhere,” Hendrick said to her.

  “You’ll stay and just hold me tonight?”

  “We care about you so much, Faith. Whatever you need, we have your back. You’re our woman, and we’re your men,” Paulie said and leaned down and kissed her lips.

  They readjusted their positions on the bed, Rocky behind her, she snuggled up against Paulie’s chest, and Hendrick lay across the bottom of the bed.

  She closed her eyes and relished in the feel of being in their arms. The protective sensations that eased all those negative thoughts and brought her the peace and safety to drift off into sleep.

  * * * *

  Faith awoke to the feel of lips against her shoulder. The warm embrace of a blanket of masculinity encased her completely. She felt content, at ease, as she blinked her eyes open and looked at Paulie.

  “Good morning, sweetie. How are you feeling?” he asked.

  “Good.”

  “No pain?” Rocky asked. She glanced at him and shook her head. Looking at Paulie’s chest, those hard, sexy muscles, she couldn’t resist caressing him. He closed his eyes as if her touch was too much to handle. It made her feel confident, capable, and like he felt what she did when he or his brothers touched her.

  “We want you, Faith. Want to make you our woman. Want to make love to you, get lost inside of you, protect you and have you as a part of us. Tell us you want that, too. Let us in,” Rocky said to her. He knelt one leg on the bed took her hand and brought it to his lips. He kissed her knuckles.

  Tears filled her eyes. She absorbed their muscles, their manliness, their hardcore attitudes, the fact that they were soldiers, were capable of hurting her in more ways than just physically and she knew she wouldn’t survive if they attacked. A tear fell from her eye. Rocky and Paulie squinted at her.

  “I’m scared to.”

  “Don’t be scared of us. Not ever,” Paulie told her.

  Her heart continued to race. Rocky somehow slid next to her, placed his arm above her head as he lay on his side and he softly kissed her breast. “Don’t you know how much you mean to us already?” he whispered and kissed her breast again. Paulie slid his palm up her thigh, opening her up to their view as Hendrick slid his palm along her belly and right to her pussy. Three men were touching her and she never felt so much. Never felt so incredibly perfect. She had to tell them the truth.

  She placed her hand over Hendrick’s fingers as he slid two digits up into her.

  She tilted her head back and moaned.

  “Hendrick, wait.” She hissed. She felt Rocky’s mouth suckle harder on her nipple and breast and Paulie slid his palm to her ass cheek and a finger stroked her asshole back and forth. She was hot, aroused and she wanted more.

  “We’re going to fill you up with cock, baby, and claim every inch of you ours. Every beautiful fucking inch,” Paulie declared and then lifted her thigh higher as he lowered and began to kiss her inner calf while Hendrick thrust fingers faster, deeper. She was coming hard, and feeling so much.

  “You want us, right? You want this, to be our woman and for us to be your men?” Rocky asked and she moaned but didn’t reply. He tugged on her nipple. Hard.

 
“Oh.”

  “Answer him. Tell us you want us to make love to you,” Hendrick said.

  “Oh God, I don’t know. I’m so scared. I…I don’t want to get hurt again.”

  They stopped what they were doing. She felt the loss of Hendrick’s thick fingers stroking her cunt and how easily Rocky played her body like an instrument.

  She was panting for breath.

  “Put him out of your head. Put every lover you’ve ever had out of your head. With us it’s new, it’s special and none of the others matter,” Rocky said with such vigor and seriousness.

  They thought she had multiple lovers. Holy God.

  “What the hell is going through that head of yours, woman?” Hendrick asked with a serious expression.

  “Some things happened in my life. Things I didn’t really go into. Things that had me closing up my heart and making me never truly give fully of myself. Not to any person, definitely not to any man, and with you I want to give it all. It’s just such a risk. You’re all so big and capable, and soldiers with huge muscles, and Jesus, the experiences you must have under your belt with women is beyond intimidating, and then there’s your capabilities as soldiers, as trained men, and I’m scared you could hurt me, lash out at me, maybe strike me in anger and I don’t have much to go by here and it’s—”

  “Whoa, my God, sweetie, you’re overthinking it all. These muscles, our capabilities are tools to protect you. We will be so possessive of you because you will belong to us. It’s pretty fucking simple. Do you want us to be your men, and do you want to be our woman? No one else for any of us. No other men, no other women,” Rocky asked her.