True Loves (A Collection of Firsts)

by Michelle A. Valentine

My beautiful sister is greeted with smiles and waves and is fully accepted back into the fold. People clear a path for her like she’s royalty back to rule her kingdom. Suddenly, in her shadow, a tinge of self-consciousness creeps into my body. I fold my arms across my chest. Why did I have to pick tonight to step away from my comforting all black ensemble?

  “I see nothing’s changed,” Alicia says to me. “I still feel like an undergrad student here.”

  I grin. “I’m sure you’ll feel different once you’re all settled into your apartment in Texas. You’ll probably rule there, too.”

  She throws her arm around me and leads me into the house. “Oh, Nat. I’m so going to miss you.”

  Once inside, Alicia grabs a couple red plastic cups, fills them from the keg, and hands one to me. “Let’s go be seen in the living room.”

  I follow her obediently toward the brick fireplace, which is the focal point of the room. She always tells me “you should always stand in the best location to get guys to notice you.” I could learn a lot from her if I was interested in picking up any old loser from this party. She always gets noticed. Her strategy must work for her. But me? I only have one guy on my mind.

  Stewart.

  Bodies fill every inch of the house and they all seem to acknowledge my sister. Most of these people never speak to me and tonight is no exception.

  I’m living proof popularity isn’t genetic.

  People clamor all around Alicia, practically pushing me out of the way to get to her. I was once told by a geeky, science nerd that when Alicia touched his shoulder and said “excuse me” was the best moment in his life. Pathetic, right?

  I fight to stay involved in her social circle for a few minutes, but finally, I give up and sit on the hearth and sip my bitter beer. If I didn’t know better, I’d say she sold her soul to a demon for popularity while I sold mine to save a mother who practically hates me.

  I study my watch. It’s nearly midnight. Where the hell is Stew? He’s the one who wanted to meet here, and it’s not like I’m early or anything. As I scan the room, the warmth of someone’s arm next to mine sends a rush of excitement through me. I can’t help but grin. Stew.

  “Who ya lookin’ for?” My grin immediately fades when I hear the voice. My stomach drops. This is not the voice I expected to hear. Sitting next to me is Stew’s best friend, Trevor Humphreys. Trevor looks good as usual, with his dark hair and eyes. He’s kind of a big man on campus around here, too. Kind of comes with being a college ball player.

  Seeing Trevor is a good thing though, because it means Stew’s somewhere close. But I’m not about to spill the beans to Trevor that I’m looking for him.

  I bite my lip. “No one.”

  He raises his brow. “Well, if you’re lookin’ for Stew…he’s not in the living room.”

  I shake my head. “I wasn’t—”

  He laughs. “Relax, Sugarman. I know…everything.”

  My eyes grow wide. “Everything?”

  He nods and smiles. “Come on. I’ll take you to him.”

  Trevor stands, and I follow suit. I risk a glance over at Alicia. She’s laughing and having a great time. Not wanting to interrupt her fun, I don’t bother telling her where I’m going. I follow behind Trevor through the crowd and then up the stairs. The stairway is crowed and a heavy smell of pot wafts around me. This is some party. Maybe the heavy partiers hang out upstairs, although Stew never said he was into the whole drug scene.

  Trevor goes to a door once we’re on the second floor and knocks. When no one answers, he opens it and motions me through. Trevor is creeping me out a little with the way he’s grinning like a baboon, but if this is what it takes to see Stew, I’ll trust him.

  I step into the darkness of what I can only guess is a bedroom and turn toward Trevor as my eyes adjust a little to the darkness. “Well?” I ask, after looking around the empty room.

  A deep, coarse laugh from Trevor reverberates around me. “Well, what?” My palms start to sweat as he closes the door and locks us both inside. Alone.

  My heart pounds with a nervous flutter as I ask, “Where is he?”

  “Where is who?” He steps close enough for me to smell the bittersweet odor of hard liquor on his breath.

  I swallow the building bile in my throat down as Trevor fingers a loose strand of my hair. “Where’s Stew?”

  He shrugs his shoulders indifferently. “He’s not here.” I take a step away but he moves in even closer. “But I’m here, and I know everything, Sugarman.”

  Taking another step back, I bump into what I imagine is the bed in the room. “Why did you tell me he was up here?”

  He drinks down the last of his beer and tosses his cup on the floor before he wipes his chin. “I wanted to get you alone because I want to be secret friends, too.”

  That’s it! I’m out of here. The way he’s looking at me with lust filled eyes tells me he’s not just talking friendship here. I try to make my way past him, but he blocks my path. His massive frame towers over me like a brick wall. “I’m not having sex with you.”

  He pushes his dark brows over his dark eyes, which makes him look evil and menacing. “Why? You think you’re too good for me? You little Goth freak. You gave it up to Stew, now how about me? We share you know.”

  I so don’t need this crap right now. What I need to do is find Stewart and ask him why the hell he told Trevor Humphrey’s I’m an easy lay. “Fuck you, Trevor.”

  The next few seconds play in slow motion and my brain kind of detaches itself from my body. As I attempt to leave again, Trevor grabs my wrists and pulls my body against his. I struggle to break free from his steel grip, but the more I fight, the angrier he gets.

  “Come on. Don’t fight it,” he slurs before he grinds his mouth against mine.

  My teeth pulverize the meaty flesh of my bottom lip and a metallic taste covers my tongue. I need to get away from him, so I try to worm my hands away from his grasp. Finally, my right hand breaks free from his tentacle-like hold. Instinct takes over and my palm makes contact with his face. My body lunges forward as I smack with all my might.

  “You bitch!” he shouts.

  The back of his hand flies across my cheek, knocking me off guard. I stumble back and cover my face with my hands. Before I have a chance to fully recover, he shoves me onto the bed. The springs coil under my weight, and my head bounces back, rattling my teeth inside my skull. I push myself up with shaky arms. I try to get my bearings because I need to get the hell out of this room.

  Trevor’s face contorts in anger when I make eye contact with him. I open my mouth to tell him to calm down, but before I can get anything out, he tackles me with the full force of his body and knocks the wind from my lungs.

  His two hundred pound frame crushes me into the mattress, and I gasp for breath. He pins my arms above my head with his massive grip, even though I’m fighting against him with all my strength, virtually rendering me helpless. His hands burn against my skin and I twist to get away from him.

  Sheer panic stings my stomach as I struggle to free myself from his clutches. My legs pump wildly as I try to buck him off me. It’s no use. He’s just too damn big. A scream rips up from my throat out of sheer frustration and panic. A growl reverberates in Trevor’s chest, and he uses his free hand to slap me again. The force of his blow knocks my face to the side. Pain shocks my core and my cheek throbs instantly. Blood drips into my mouth from a gash in my lip. The fight from inside of me starts to fade.

  I squeeze my eyes shut. Trevor Humphreys is about to rape me. I always thought I would be tough enough to fight off an attacker if I was ever in this position, but I was dead wrong. My only option now is to beg. Maybe it will make him realize what he’s doing.

  Bile rises up in my throat as I think about what he has planned. “Please, Trevor,” I whimper. “Please. No.”

  Warm tears flow into my hair, and I attempt to get Trevor’s bloodshot brown eyes to focus on me, to realize he’s doing something wrong. No such luck. H
is eyes burn with unfathomable rage—rage he’s ready to take out on me.

  His hand runs roughly up my thigh and reaches under my skirt. My breath catches. His fingers turn into claws as his nails scratch my skin in attempts to pull my panties down.

  “See, Sugarman, I can be just as nice as Masterson,” he says between ragged breaths. He leans in for a kiss, but I whip my face away from him, so instead he kisses my neck.

  His cologne overpowers me, and I grow light headed from the strong stench of spicy musk that crams my nostrils. I breathe through my mouth and shut my eyes. I just want him to stop and go away.

  “Please. I’m begging you. Please, stop.”

  He ignores my pleas, and his sloppy kisses continue to leave a trail of slobbery wetness on my neck. I try to force my brain to take me to another place, far away, so I won’t have to endure the guaranteed torture he has in store for me. I begin to zone out.

  There’s a hard knock on the door. “Natalie?”

  My body tenses at the sound of possible help, and once again I have enough energy to fight back. I open my mouth to scream for help, but Trevor’s massive hand quickly muffles the sound.

  “Natalie?” Rick calls again. “Are you all right?”

  “Get lost, fucker! Sugarman’s busy,” Trevor shouts. His body stills like a statue, allowing a blanket of silence to cover the room. He stares daringly at the door with narrowed eyes.

  “Natalie?” Rick calls, his voice agitated.

  I whimper under Trevor’s disgusting palm and try to squirm away from him. He locks his eyes on me. “Sugarman, I swear to God, you better not say a word.”

  At this point I figure I really only have two choices—lay here and take it, or make a scene and let Rick know I need help. I decide to go for door number two, and before I can think about it I sink my teeth into the fleshy part of Trevor’s palm. Warm blood seeps into my mouth before he jerks his hand away. I know I got him good. Here’s my chance.

  “Rick!” I scream before Trevor raises his hand to smack me yet again. I cover my face to avoid any additional blows.

  There’s a loud crack, and the white six-paneled door nearly flies off the hinges as Rick kicks it in. The light shining from the hallway casts an angelic halo around him, like he’s my own personal savior.

  “What the hell, dude?” Trevor shouts, but the murderous look in Rick’s face tells me he’s not here to discuss the situation.

  Rick storms over and grabs Trevor from behind with the strength of ten men and throws his sick ass to the floor.

  Trevor attempts to stand, but he’s quickly shoved back down and lands with a heavy thud. “Don’t get up until I say you can,” Rick orders.

  Trevor doesn’t listen and tries again. “I think you need to mind your own fucking business!”

  Without warning, Rick springs on Trevor like a wild animal and lands a hard right-handed punch in his face. “She.” Another punch. “Is.” And another. “My business.”

  Rick releases Trevor’s shirt and lets him fall limply to the floor. My knight in shining armor splays his fingers, trying to shake the pain from his hand. Then, he turns to me. “Are you okay?”

  I look down at myself and realize my skirt is still shoved around my waist. I quickly smooth it down. There’s a smear of blood on the back of my hand. My bottom lip still throbs, so I trace it with my fingers. Blood covers my fingertips and I wipe them on my skirt and then run my fingers through my hair. Slowly, I peer up and meet Rick’s intense gray eyes, then quickly break away. Bodies pile into the room to check out the commotion. It seems the entire party has found its way into this enormous bedroom to witness my rescue. “I’m fine. Can we go?”

  He nods, reaches over to take my hand, and then leads me through the gawking crowd. Every couple of seconds through the staircase gauntlet, I hear my name whispered.

  “Can you believe someone would fight over Sugarman?”

  “She’s such a freak.”

  “Rick’s too hot for her.”

  Tears threaten to spill from my eyes at the sound of their words. I let go of Rick’s hand and place my hands over my ears. I follow close behind him and try to block out the world around me. We reach the living room, and I feel the warmth of his hand on the small of my back. He guides me out the door into the cool night air. I drop my hands from my ears, feeling safe from the judgmental whispers in the house. I wipe the fallen tears from my cheek with the palms of my hands.

  Rick grasps my hand in his large, warm fingers. “Are you sure you’re okay? I can always go back in and finish the job on Trevor.”

  I sniff and shake my head. “No, that won’t be necessary. Besides, I think you already did a pretty good job whipping his ass.” I pause and take a shaky breath. “I’m just really glad you showed up when you did. Thank you.”

  He pulls me into a hug beside his car. “Me too,” he whispers. The heat of his body pulsates from him and envelopes me in comfort for some strange reason. “I would’ve killed him if anything did happen.”

  There is an odd feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don’t deserve his kindness, but I appreciate he’s given me a second chance. The thought of disappointing my only friend earlier makes his words sting. “Why are you so nice to me? Especially after how I treated you?”

  He pulls back, and I stare into his charcoal-gray eyes. “Because I care about you, Natalie. And even though you pick that asshole Stewart Masterson over me, I’m still glad you’re my friend.”

  My head drops instantly at the sound of his name. “That’s over.”

  It’s harder than I thought to hear myself admit it out loud. Stewart was using me. Trevor made that quite clear. I know it’s over now. Stewart doesn’t even have the balls to tell me to my face. Instead, he leaves me stranded at this party and made me look like a complete moron.

  Rick frowns, like he’s concerned for me. “Really?”

  I nod. “Yeah, really.”

  Rick’s lips meet my forehead in a gentle kiss and I close my eyes. An electric tingle zings through my entire body. He cradles my face in his hands and his thumbs caress my cheeks, and before I’m ready, he slowly breaks away and I open my eyes.

  “Good,” he whispers. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”

  Chapter 9

  “Natalie?” the voice sounds like it’s down deep in a five gallon bucket somewhere. “Natalie!” This time I roll over to find my sister, drunk and kneeling at my side whispering so loud she might as well announce to Mom and Dad she’s just getting in. “Are you awake?”

  “I am now,” I grumble.

  “Good, because I wanted to talk to you.” She giggles. “So, what’s up with you and that Rick guy? I thought you were dating Steeeeewart,” she slurs his name, stretching it into three syllables instead of just two.

  God, I so don’t want to talk about this. “Yeah, well, he stood me up and apparently he told his douche friend I’m easy. That asshole Trevor tricked me into going upstairs with him and he tried some stuff.”

  She sways as she leans back and grimaces. “Stuff? What kind of stuff?”

  I roll over and pull the comforter over my head. “I really don’t want to talk about it. Nothing happened. Rick made sure of that.” I need a subject change fast because I don’t want her to go nuts over the situation. “How’d you get home anyway? You didn’t drive like that did you?”

  “Of course not!” She sounds appalled.

  I yawn, causing my cheeks to stings and I’m glad it’s really dark in here. I’m sure I look horrendous after taking those smacks from Trevor. Alicia, in her drunken state, would completely freak out and wake up the entire house if she saw me.

  She pulls down my comforter. “I hear Rick kicked Trevor’s ass over you, but no one’s really sure why.”

  Nobody would believe the truth anyway. They think Rick is too good for me. No way would they ever believe I was with Stew. “Hmph. Well now you know. If Stewart would’ve been there like he promised, none of this would’ve happened. I hate him so m
uch.”

  We sit wrapped in dark silence for a couple of minutes, but it doesn’t last long. Alicia is a talker and she babbles constantly when she’s tipsy. “Well, tell me more about this Rick guy. He’s really cute. Someone pointed him out to me before the whole fight thing went down. It was like he came straight to the party to find you or something, because he wasn’t there long. Who knew you were such a hot guy magnet.”

  A smile spreads across my lips. The right side of my face aches with pain, and my grin quickly fades. Rick is cute, but I don’t need to jump into another relationship so soon. It’s going to take a while before I get over Stew and what he did to me.

  What am I thinking? I don’t need to focus on anybody. Only me. It’s not fair to drag a guy into a relationship when I won’t be around much longer. But I am glad Rick cares enough for me to beat the ever-living shit out of Trevor for me.

  Alicia still waits on me to acknowledge my relationship status with Rick to her. I have to give her something. There’s no way I can pretend I don’t know him. “We eat lunch together sometimes. He’s really…nice.”

  “Nice?” Alicia questions. “That’s always what you say when you want to avoid something.”

  I sigh. She’s digging. “Okay, he’s interesting, but I’m not ready to, like, date him or anything.”

  “Natalie.” She leans in close and rests her elbows on my bed. “To hell with Stewart. He’s an ass. You should give Rick a chance. I mean, the guy beat up Trevor Humphreys over you. Besides, what better way to get back at Stewart than date a hottie like Rick?” She taps my arm. “Show old Stewy what he's missing.”

  I shouldn’t care about Stew, but I do. I turn my head toward her. “That could really hurt Stewart, though.”

  Alicia growls in frustration. “Yeah, so? That ass deserves it. Didn’t he hurt you?” Her words feel like another slap in the face. More reminders of all the trouble Stew caused me tonight.

  “Yes,” I whisper. It’s hard to admit it to her as well as to myself. Stew’s betrayal sends waves of nausea through my belly. This was his second chance and he blew it. He never really cared for me after all.