True Loves (A Collection of Firsts)

by Michelle A. Valentine

  I make it as far as the large oak tree in the middle of the front yard. I cling to it for support as I bend at the waist. A thick green liquid spews from my mouth. It tastes bitter and sour at the same time and it makes me vomit even harder. My nose runs with clear mucus and my eyes sting.

  Rick holds my hair back as he rubs my back—the same calming circular motion my mom used to do when I was a little kid and got sick. I try to shove him away between heaves, but he doesn’t budge.

  When there’s nothing left, I straighten my posture and take a deep breath. Rick holds out a napkin and a bottle of water for me. I take them with a shaky hand.

  “Thanks.” I wipe my lips and then take a swig of the water. “You just randomly carry napkins and water around with you?”

  He smirks. “I keep a supply in my car. Sometimes deals can take a lot out of you and I wasn’t sure how you’d react, so I brought extra.” He rubs his chin and watches me drink. “Doing deals kind of makes me hungry.”

  I raise an eyebrow. Hungry? That’s just a morbid thing to say after I puke my guts out. I shake my head and think back to the first day I met Rick. “So the time we went out to Drakes and you wolfed down your hamburger in record time…”

  “Just got done with a deal.” He answers me and then winks.

  I finish the last bit of water and then turn to him. “Okay, so let’s get this over with. I don’t know how much longer I can stand being out here in the stink pit.”

  He nods and starts toward the front entrance. We step around all the trash and make it to the stoop. Rick knocks on the faded blue door, and gives me a quick glance before he knocks again. This time when he’s done knocking, Rick gives his hands one firm clap. When the door doesn’t open, Rick gets this annoyed look on his face.

  “What is it?” I ask.

  Rick doesn’t answer me. Instead he bashes in the door with his foot. It flies open and slams into the inside wall. The dust covered pictures on the wall rattle and a couple fall off. Glass shatters all over the dirt covered floor.

  Without an invitation, Rick marches inside the door. Glass crunches under his heavy black boots with each step he takes. I follow behind him and stop in the doorway when I spot a body slumped on the staircase.

  The man has shoulder length red hair and a Grizzly Adams beard that matches the color on his head. Dried leaves poke out from his beard and oil stains cover his wife beater shirt. He looks homeless. And he fits the definition of a dirt bag precisely.

  I stand silent not sure what to do next, waiting on Rick to make the first move. Rick tilts his head from side to side as he glares at the man and a charge stirs in the air.

  Rick takes my hand without breaking his gaze. The contact of his skin on mine sends images of the sins of this man into my brain. My body sways and I squeeze Rick’s hand tight.

  This deal isn’t like the last one. This man, Jeremy Phillips, is an alcoholic-druggie who abuses his wife and keeps her chained in the basement when he’s tired of looking at her. Jeremy beats his wife daily just to see her suffer. He enjoys power and the euphoric rush he gets from others pain.

  An image of Jeremy knocking out his wife’s tooth because she refused to eat a dead rat, sears my brain. I flinch instantly at such an act of cruelty.

  The last vision shows Jeremy taking enough drugs to kill himself. He’s going to die tonight, with or without my help. No sadness for the loss of this man’s life enters my conscious.

  To be honest, I’m glad this man will be damned to hell. No one deserves to torture another living soul the way he does.

  Blood boils in my veins as I see the woman chained in the basement behind my eyelids.

  Rick lets go of my hands and I glare at Jeremy Phillips. “We know what you’ve done to your wife,” I hiss.

  It’s almost like it isn’t me speaking. The tone in my voice is dark and menacing and it scares me for a split second that I am becoming true evil myself.

  The red-headed man opens his eyes and stares at us. He rubs his eyes and grabs the stair railing to pull himself upright.

  Jeremy backs against the wall, his eyes wide. “Who are you people? What the fuck are you doing in my house?”

  I shrug. My soul pulls toward this man like a chain yanking me forward. A familiar hum zings through my bones. Now I know why my body always seeks out the damned. Their souls call to mine, reaching out to me.

  It’s easier than I thought giving into the call. All these years I fought the feeling—fearing it, because I knew a death was inevitable and the demon was close. I never thought about the possibility that I was feeling the victim’s energy, too.

  I assume Rick wants me to take the lead on this soul collection, like I did the last time.

  I push away from the doorway and take a step toward Jeremy. My heart thumps so hard my pulse pounds in my fingertips. The urge to wrap my hands around Jeremy’s neck and crush his windpipe is hard to resist. When a damned person’s soul caused my bones to hum before, I never knew their sin. But now that Rick has shown me what this man has done, anger comes very natural to me.

  A severe need to punish this man flows through my very core and my bones vibrate even harder. “It doesn’t matter who we—” Rick grabs my wrist and stops me mid-sentence.

  “We want to make you a deal.” Rick cuts me off and shakes his head.

  My face twists. What are we waiting for? Let’s nail this guy.

  Jeremy scratches his scraggily red beard and narrows his eyes suspiciously. “What kind of deal?”

  Rick stretches out his hand. “Just shake my hand, promise me your soul, and you’ll be set free of all your financial burdens.”

  Financial burdens? You’ve got to be kidding me. This guy is worried about money? I shake my head and let out a huff.

  Jeremy eyes me. He’s not buying it.

  Rick’s head whips in my direction. “Tell him.” He jerks his head Jeremy’s way. “We can guarantee all of his problems will go away.”

  I hold Rick’s gaze and take a breath. He raises his eyebrows and mouths ‘do it’. I roll my eyes. I can’t believe Rick has to be nice to this guy and pretend to be an Angel of Mercy instead of the Demon of Death I know he is.

  My gaze drills into Jeremy. I want to unleash the anger I feel inside on him. The need to right the wrongs he’s committed fills me. After looking at Rick’s face, I know I can’t. This collection will require me to be nice and use a bit of finesse. “He’s right.” I nod in Rick’s direction. “He has the power to make anything happen.”

  “All you want is my soul?” Jeremy asks. “If I say yes, you’ll give me all the money I need?”

  “I’ll give you more than you’ll ever need.” Rick stretches out his hand further.

  My eyes bounce between Jeremy’s face and Rick’s outstretched hand. The tension in the air swirls around the three of us. If he doesn’t choose to take the deal, I’ll still be short two souls.

  I bite the inside of my cheek as beads of sweat form on my upper lip. A drop rolls into my mouth and I taste the saltiness. Jitters roll through my body when Jeremy starts shaking his head.

  Oh my God. He’s not going to do it.

  Shit.

  My eyes burn and I fight back the tears.

  Jeremy reaches out and firmly grabs Rick’s hand. What the hell? Pain rips through me before I have ttime to think about what made the man change his mind. As soon as they release hands the pain stops and I flex my fingers.

  “Deal,” Jeremy mutters. “Now when do I get my money?”

  Rick’s lips turn into a smug grin. The same evil grin I’ve seen numerous times from him during deals. “Oh you won’t be getting any money.”

  Jeremy’s face twists with anger. “No, money?” Rick shakes his head. “What do I get then?”

  “This,” Rick says, as he snaps his fingers.

  A noose appears out of thin air tied to the banister on the second floor. It dangles over top of us from the second floor balcony.

  Jeremy’s dark eyes turn ha
rd as he looks up at the noose. “I didn’t agree to this.”

  An evil smile stretches across Rick’s face, and his eyes dance with cruel intent. “Yes you did. Your soul is mine. Therefore I’ll take it whenever I want to.”

  “No! You can’t do this!” Jeremy pleads as he turns away from us. “I change my mind.”

  Rick cocks his head to the side. “Too late. Nat, I need you to put that noose around his neck.”

  My job as killer was pretty well defined earlier, so this time I don’t hesitate. The thick ropes are rough against my skin.

  Pointing his index finger at Jeremy, Rick whips his wrist and our victim hovers in the air just inches from me. Jeremy thrashes his feet wildly, trying to break free from the invisible demonic grip.

  “No!” Jeremy cries. “I’ll do better. I’ll be better.”

  I glide the noose around Jeremy’s neck and give it a yank to tighten it. With another flick of Rick’s fingers the rope squeezes even more.

  Tears and snot pour from Jeremy’s face. “Please, God. No!”

  Rick snorts. “God? You should’ve asked him for help when you were hurting your wife.”

  “I’m sorry.” Jeremy’s cries are pathetic. He’s begging, asking for mercy while he showed his wife none.

  “I’m not,” Rick growls before pointing his finger up toward the ceiling.

  The noose yanks on the man’s neck, and a loud audible snap echoes throughout the house. His legs hang freely, swinging slightly from side to side. His tongue protrudes from his mouth, and his eyeballs practically bulge out of his skull.

  After I watch Rick collect the soul, he turns to me and says, “Come on. We have to go.”

  I can’t tear my eyes away from the dead body swaying above me. The thought of leaving him here, hanging like that, seems cruel. But he doesn’t deserve any sympathy. Deep down I know that.

  I turn toward the door, but stop dead in my tracks. His wife is still chained to a wall in the basement. If I don’t set her free, it might be a while before someone finds her. She could die down there.

  Rick touches my hand, urging me outside.

  “We can’t leave yet,” I say.

  He shakes his head. “I know what you’re thinking, but she’s not the one we came for, Natalie.”

  “To hell with that. I know you’re not opposed to breaking the rules when it comes to deals.”

  “I can’t hold time much longer. She can’t see you and tie you to Jeremy’s death.”

  I shake out of his grip and dash down the hallway. I find the door from my visions, the one he’ll never force her into again, and fling it open. I flip on the light switch and tear down the stairs. Jeremy’s wife sits on the floor, frozen in time, surrounded by her own excrement.

  Frantically, I search for the key rack that I saw in the images. I finally locate the pad lock key, hanging on a nail on the opposite side of the room. The woman jars and I freeze. Crap! Rick’s losing his hold on time. She stops moving and I run over to place the key in front of her. Hopefully she’ll see it and assume he just dropped it. This isn’t ideal, but it’ll have to do.

  I quickly climb the steps to the first floor and sunlight from the open door to the outside shines in. Rick leans against the doorframe. A faint smile dances across his lips, almost like he approves of my good deed before he waves me to come on.

  Once outside, Rick claps his hands to restart time and we bolt toward the car.

  My legs fly beneath me and my feet pound the dusty path, stirring up a cloud of dirt behind me. When I reach the safety of the black sports car, I sigh heavily. Sliding into the car, my body quivers with the aftershocks of another intense adrenaline rush.

  Even though the normal reaction when someone dies is sadness, I can’t help but to feel relieved. Not only am I doing the world a service by ridding it of those evil men, but I’m helping myself as well. Two souls down. One to go.

  Rick cranks the car alive and asks, “Are you okay?”

  I nod, speechless for once. Awkward silence fills the car’s interior as Rick turns his car around.

  “You did good back there,” he says as he pulls out onto the road.

  Still shaking, I wrap my arms around my body and stare blankly at the dash.

  He steals a glance at me. “Some deals are more difficult than others.”

  The evil grin of satisfaction he had on his face back there makes me shake harder. “You creeped me out back there. It’s the first time I’ve seen you…”

  He grimaces. “What? Look like a demon?”

  “In this form, yeah,” I whisper. I’d seen him look plenty evil in his boy demon form, but this Rick I know doesn’t always seem so bad. It’s easy to forget he is the same person that tormented me with evil all my life.

  Taking a deep breath. I run my fingers through my hair and try to refocus my energy. “That asshole made me nervous. I started to wonder if he was going to take the deal.”

  “Me too. They always have a choice. That’s the beauty of free will.”

  Free will? I guess I had a choice too, if you count my mother dying in front of me as an option. “But you lied to him.”

  He looks me in the eye. “I didn’t say I played fair.”

  I hope he’s playing fair with me.

  Not wanting to continue this conversation with Rick any further, I turn my head, and gaze out the passenger window. The nature outside zings by as we head back into town. My body feels weak, like I’ve just finished running a long distance marathon, so I close my eyes and allow the blackness to blanket my mind.

  It takes another fifteen minutes to reach campus. Rick parks his car next to mine and cuts the engine. His dark gray eyes fixate on me and a weak smile plays on his lips. He opens his mouth, like he wants to say something, but then quickly shuts it. He scratches the back of his neck and sighs.

  Before he has the chance to say another word, I fling open the door and hop out of the car. Clutching my bag to my chest with one arm, I dig in the pocket of my jeans for my car keys. I hear a car door behind me open, and two seconds later, Rick stands beside me.

  “Everything okay?” he asks.

  I drag my eyes up to meet his face. “Fine. Just getting my keys.”

  “Aren’t you hungry? We could go get something.”

  I shake my head. I need time away from him to process everything I’ve been through today.

  Not only did I participate in two murders, I found an evil part of me that actually enjoyed it. Delivering vengeance to the men that caused so many others pain made each heartbeat pound with pride. Maybe I am evil.

  Waves of nausea roll through my stomach as I think back on the men’s faces. Disgusted with the sick pleasure I got out of our activities today, I dig deeper for my keys, seeking an immediate escape from Rick.

  Finally, I retrieve my keys and unlock the car before throwing my bag in.

  “Natalie, if you want to talk about today…”

  “No!” I whirl around to face Rick. “I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s just get one more soul, so I can be done with all of this.”

  He drops his head and rubs his thumb over his key ring. His long, dark hair masks his face. “This isn’t easy. Doing the things I do…it’s a lot to accept. I know. I’m trying to make this as easy as possible for you, Nat. I really am. I want you to trust me.”

  I sigh, and the scowl drops off my face. “I know, I just don’t know why you waited this long to tell me who you are. If you would’ve told me when we met in the parking lot on the first day of school, I would’ve had weeks to get this done, not days.”

  “I was hoping you’d remember me. It’s crazy. I honestly thought your memory would come back once we spent some time together, and…you’d want to be like me. Be together—forever, just like we planned before,” he whispers.

  He’s still holding on to the hope I’ll love him. It’s all over his face. “Were you planning on telling me once you figured out I didn’t remember?” I try to read his expressions and when he
doesn’t look at me, it hits me. “You weren’t going to tell me, were you?”

  He shrugs. “I wasn’t sure what I was going to do.”

  Heat creeps up my neck and my head feels like it’s about to pop off. “You’re fucking unbelievable!”

  He reaches for me, but I swat his hand away. I leave him standing there as I flop down in my car seat and slam the door. That asshole had no plans of ever telling me he is a demon—my demon. He was just going to let my life lines fade away and leave me with no other alternative but to become a demon and collect souls like him.

  Revving my little four-cylinder and spinning the tires, I fling gravel all over the parking lot. In the rearview mirror, Rick fans the dust away as I tear out of the parking lot.

  My eyes sting as I fight back the millions of tears threatening to spill out of them. I roll down the window, allowing the cool fall air to whirl around my face.

  I make it home and run upstairs without saying a word to Mom. I can’t deal with that scene right now.

  Relief floods my body when I close my bedroom door. I let out a heavy sigh and slide down the door. My breaths feel labored and I grasp my chest. I can’t go on much longer like this.

  Chapter 22

  Last night I had to lie—well not exactly lie—about Rick and me breaking up. Mom’s under the impression he dumped me. It was the only reason I could explain why I locked myself in my room and cried myself to sleep. She’s better off left in the dark about most things, because truthfully, I don’t think she can handle much more drama.

  Dad didn’t come home last night. He probably thinks I told Mom about our little conversation. I think she stayed up and waited up on him for a while. She doesn’t know I heard her crying in her room well into the night.

  I can sympathize with feeling betrayed and heartbroken.

  My Converse shoes squeak on the hard tile floor as I walk to my Statistics class. Alicia would just die if she saw me mixing this skirt with my old sneakers and torn fishnets. I hate wearing the high-heeled shoes she picked out. They kill my feet and they aren’t exactly conducive to soul collecting.